Ruby Granger #36 Pumpkin Bread Activity

[StatusWoe]

I can’t help but feel that if this were real life, Erimentha would be regarded by the school as a major PITA and the scholarship would be quietly withdrawn.

Just while we're on this topic, scholarship students don't need to be low-income. It basically just means they're given a fee reduction because they're talented in one or more areas. It's not usually a very large deduction either - like 25% and rarely more than 50% of fees. If Ruby's trying to write about a poor character at a posh school, the term she wants is 'bursary' because they're the things that are means-tested. Apologies for this highly specific tangent lol.

“They don’t offer psychology in year 7 but I still made the GCSE teacher a pamphlet about the changes in mental health care, from Plath’s time in McLean Hospital up until the present day. The historical element means that I can also show Mr Aldridge – I expect that he’d find that interesting”

You'd expect that, would you?

“I am actually thrilled – sitting so close to the teacher means that we can converse about Cambodia and mental health care while my peers chatter seamlessly about lip gloss, social media and pop music”

First of all, this is horrible. Surely Ruby intended this to be comedy?? Second, I'm not sure 'seamlessly' is the word Ruby's looking for in this context. Maybe incessantly?

"I will continue doing extension projects, even if it means sneaking them to my teachers in the dead of night as though I am part of some clandestine organisation"

This image is killing me. Erimentha Ruby breaking and entering in the middle of the night, trying to deliver her ASSAY on mental health care in 1960s Cambodia. Wow I hope this isn't autobiographical lmao.

 

[GoinDowntown]

RuB or not RuB

 

[paulpercy666]

Isn’t there a rule about living within 25 miles of the uni for Oxbridge? Years ago, I thought about applying for the MEd at Cambridge and one of the things that put me off was the rule about living within a specific distance of the university and I realised how much more expensive that was going to make it. Maybe it’s changed post-Covid but that seems like something Ruby maybe hasn’t thought of.

Not to worry - Mother Granger is unemployed and afaik you can evade tax from anywhere in the country so Daddy Bones is under no obligation to stay at home. They can move in with Roobs

 

[scrantonstrangler]

When I was in uni certain professors told us NOT to use books except for the assigned or approved books because research is constantly changing and you don't know how up-to-date certain information and data is. Though I suppose it doesn't matter for her now because she's not seriously learning, she's essentially playing school with her stuffed animals in her bedroom, and she can put Dr Suess books in her bibliography as she pleases

 

[gossip_guy]

With every video her accent gets worse and it sounds more and more like one of those videos where they try to show what English sounds like to people who don't speak it. Like, I've heard most of those syllable sounds before, and sometimes they even make a real word, but she sure as hell isn't speaking any language I've ever heard before. It's like Cockney Simlish.

 

[DrinaM]

"I purse my lips and try to keep my face level with hers, which is tricky because she is a couple inches taller than me. Mind you her poor posture does make her rather a lot shorter"

"I hold her gaze for a few seconds, my eyes steady and controlled, hers dull and brown"

This is so judgemental and unkind. No wonder she gets bullied. And what's wrong with having brown eyes? Erimentha is so incredibly unlikeable and snooty. Literally what was Ruby thinking, writing shit like this? Does she think its acceptable to talk about others this way? What a revolting little brat.
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thank you, @LostGhosts, for including Quotes, it's hard to believe this is a real book anyway

and yes, thank you to @LostGhosts for the selected quotes.

 

[gossip_guy]

Her list for “work” at school:
Book club poster
?Quizlet set?
Mr G meeting
Mrs E email

Is she working in admin?!

She also claims to be marking a tonne of essays, but that just seems like bullshit she's added on to make her "job" seem more important. I'd be flabbergasted if the school trusted someone with no qualifications, training or understanding of English who'd been there for 5 seconds to grade everyone's essays.

Also she's been talking about this Quizlets thing for years and I've never known anyone else to actually use it. Is that an actual thing used in schools or is this just Ruby trying to act like she's revolutionising the learning process with her usual pointless, outdated crap? Or does she just think flash cards are called Quizlets because of her withered raisin brain?
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One hundred planner giveaway...and three classes will apparently win and split those between them...

I see she's about as good at math as she is English.

 

[DrinaM]

She's a robot just beginning to recognise humans are, in fact, alive.

Does she know that a 'community' is a group of people? And yes, alive people do in fact breathe. When I hear her describe things, I can picture the expressions on the faces of the interviewers at her Oxford undergrad interview lol.

 

[berkeleymoon87]

Regarding that TikTok, her fans are defending her saying that she's changed, but her whole brand is literally PUMPKIN PRODUCTIVITY. She sells planners and bases her entire personality on a bunch of routines and how much she does and reads in a day. Her latest video is about how she read 17 books in a month while supposedly balancing a job. The only reason why she suddenly started talking about the toxicity of hustle culture and grades is because she wasn't doing much after she graduated. It made her feel better about herself. I guarantee that if she gets accepted to Oxford, she'll make "17 hour study day at Oxford" videos. Plus, the fact that she never shows her whole personality. It went from Harry Potter, to Cottage Core, to Dark Academia, to Emily Dickinson, and now part-time teacher. And every time it's just marketing for whatever she's selling/promoting.

 

[pineconez]

I thought I was mishearing things, but apparently the closed captions also agreed that we should crave breast

 

[ghostly_prince]

Her recent reads. The crap Hunger Games prequel gets the same rating as Brothers Karamazov (did not contain as many brothers as I thought it would, 4 stars). Tuesdays with Morrie, of which someone on gr says ”it was like stapling together 80 greeting cards and reading them straight through,” gets 5 stars.

I find it hilarious that she painfully shoved her reading of Brothers Karamazov down everyone's throat to appear intelligent yet took ages to read it. But for the hunger games book (which is a pretty long book as well...over 500 pages) she just adds to her goodreads with no indication of her actually reading it the last however long. She just has to up her book/page count for goodreads.

She probably rated Tusedays with Morrie 5 stars because of all the ✨️kINdNesS✨️ in it. It's a good book but not a 5 star literary masterpiece in my opinion.

 

[Griftwood]

Ooh time for engagement definitely not at all repetitive

 

[LostGhosts]

Erimentha Parker Chapters 8 and 9:

Plot -
- After all the build up to the stupid volcano experiment we just get told it is a "realistic and impressive eruption" and that is the end of that
- She does some more work teachers didn't ask for so she can be top pupil
- Before bed Ruby reorganises her candles and uses her ruler to make sure they are evenly spaced"
- Her and her mum talk about going to a museum and Ruby's mum praises her for being interested when most other kids just complained about being bored. Ruby then says "you mean Nathan". Clearly no one in this family likes Nathan, poor kid
- The next day in form the class get assigned their sets for maths and English
- The bullies behind her call her pick-me Parker since she always puts her hand up. Ruby turns around to tell them off and Mr Aldridge asks her to not talk during class. The ordeal of being told off makes her cry
- Ruby thinks about the fact that Simone and self help books said to tell a teacher about bullying but she doesn't want to ruin her "near-perfect image"
- We also learn that alongside her book of to do lists, and book of facts she also has a book of quotations. How many books does this girl carry around in one go
- The girls are all assigned school email accounts and have set all the passwords to nightingale for now and need to be changed tonight. Ruby would have done it straight away but she had a tennis lesson after school
- When she gets home Ruby goes to change her password and finds 6 unread emails. The first one is from her head of year saying how disappointed she is with her and will be punished for her inappropriate behaviour. And even worse, she is going to tell her parents. We are left on a cliff-hanger as to what has happened but it is pretty obvious

Quotes -
- "The project is nowhere near as bulky as I would have liked and when Simone leaves I spend two hours writing out a 6 page essay"
- "It's beautifully aesthetic and I can see why Maria so adored brown paper packages tied up with string"
- "As a tribute of sorts to my Geography teacher, I have made my own in and out tray, just like hers, out of old cereal boxes"
- "With her hand always in the air, she's pretty difficult to ignore. There's a reason she's called 'Pick-me Parker after all"
- "Some of the pictures especially in the autumn and winter months, are just so quintessential that save them for scrapbooking"

 

[MissTomato]

you wrote a more substantial and meaningful poem than any of these post-post modern poets do. i hate this "genre" of instapoetry so so much as well. like dudes, go on twitter and write a tweet. there is no need to put arbitrary line breaks and waste paper to print these on.

 

[SharyBobbins]

P.s. I wouldn't be surprised if Ruby's diet was leading to low iron. You need to be careful with vegan diets. Anaemia has a few causes, but the primary symptom in each type is extreme fatigue. I've had iron-deficiency anaemia before and it was totally debilitating until I figured out the cause. So Ruby, if you're reading here, please get a blood test.

I am iron deficient (combination of vegetarian diet for years and menorrhagia). It didn't show up in a full blood test as my red and white cells were just in the normal range but my ferritin and transferrin levels were tested and they were extremely low. For a long time before it was found, I had low moods, each day I'd wake up and mentally say "I can't" as soon as I opened my eyes, my hair was dry so I was always trying new conditioners, the brain fog was embarrassing- I kept forgetting things off my to-do lists at work, and above all I was so tired. I'd come home from work and cry sometimes.

I'm feeling more normal now but the iron tablets aren't fun. And yes, I think Ruby may be iron deficient too given her diet and how she's so tired and struggling with her mental health. I hope she finds out the cause and gets better.

 

[ammie]

She might just be doing the odd lesson or lunchtime tuition but even working part time you will work a full day or half day at the least not 3 hours... I wish I had ruby's free time

 

[gossip_guy]

It's an academic application and English lit is not a vocational degree, they don't care if you come across as 'sheltered' or if you haven't had a real job before. Lots of people who do masters/phds have never worked a day in their lives (especially in subjects like English where most students are wealthy - most working class undergrad English students don't have the privilege of forking out to do a masters in a subject with so few career prospects).
They care that you have a good undergraduate transcript, letters of recommendation, decent writing skills and potential to succeed. Ruby was more than capable of cobbling together essays made up of other peoples ideas to convince Exeter lecturers to give her firsts, so there's really no reason why she wouldn't also convince Oxford to let her in. Her little side projects she's done over her gap yah are only filler to bulk up her application and for her to show she has an interest.

Would they not be looking at her CV and general work/academic history as an indication of what kind of candidate she is, though? (Genuine question, I have no history with Oxford admissions.) I assume there's a reason they ask for a CV as part of the supporting documents for non-vocational degrees as well, especially if she's likely to be highlighting "work" roles in her personal statement to try to boost her chances.

She also had the benefit of Exeter's well-publicised grade inflation on her side there. If the essays and writing she's shown are any indication of what she'll be offering up as her academic samples and proposal, I'd be shocked if she managed to bullshit her way past Oxford admissions with that kind of crap. I'm guessing at post-grad there's much more value placed on original proposals instead of rehashed ideas that have been explored countless times in academic research, which has never been her strong suit, so I'm not optimistic about her chances.

But maybe that's why she's off skiing, to celebrate her acceptance and "accidentally" nudge Martha off a mountain to come home an only child.

 

[gossip_guy]

Let’s take a moment to appreciate the pretentious way she titles her journal entries

View attachment 1994167View attachment 1994170

Ahh, yes, the Kimpton Fit2Roy. What a wonderful place.
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We all know she won't be returning either pair

Going full Erimentha, keeping a spare ski outfit in her bag in case bullies toss water and/or undulating flour on her out on the slopes.

 

[Redrose97]

I had a look on Blakeney's LinkedIn and it's amazing to see how much she has done in comparison to Ruby while she was at university, she's worked while doing a full time degree and she volunteered ect, and is working, and really seemed to make the most out of uni and got a first, while Ruby regressed into a child over her time at uni.

Does anyone remember when Ruby ran out of her house when vlogging when home alone as there was a noise? I'm trying to think of my strangest Ruby moments, it's that or the cabbage porridge. What's everyone's?

 

[rubysdeadfly]

“I am actually thrilled – sitting so close to the teacher means that we can converse about Cambodia and mental health care while my peers chatter seamlessly about lip gloss, social media and pop music”

I am the peer that chatters about lip gloss, social media and pop music lmao me in class applying my dior lip oil as I talk about elphabas latest meltdown