Things that I took away from her recent video.
1. Still cannot strike a match or light a candle properly.
2. Peanut butter looks like watery diarrhea. Lovely.
3. Can't pour things without spilling it all over the place.
4. Spends a ridiculous amount of time explaining why she reads while brushing her teeth. Doesn't matter. We brush our teeth to remove food, bacteria and plaque. She is splashing those things all over her books. That is disgusting. Absolutely revolting.
5. Still doesn't create an appropriate title for her video. Halfway through she is into a non-working morning routine.
6. Doesn't have time to do a routine, so why bother in the first place?
7. Is fascinated with her messy bed and her new stuffed animals. Get a grip, woman.
8. Completely avoids how she gets back and forth to work, which we all know is her Mommy.
9. Acts as though she has the most amazing makeup routine. She hardly wears any. Just two drops spread across her fake freckles.
10. Fake freckle application getting out of hand. Looks more like the measles now.
11. Reads 5 minutes here, 5 minutes there, filming it all, never truly absorbed in a book, because it is all performance. But she LOVES reading.
12. Is fascinated with dead plants. Still.
13. Throws in some time with her dog, very half-heartedly. You hear it in her voice and by the way her dog always walks away from her.
14. Now she needs to research something every day. What happened to reading some Philosophy every morning? Oh, yeah, more performance.
15. Entire video seems random, choppy, lackluster and incredibly phony. Isn't it time to just grow up and get an actual life, Rubes?