Step 1: determine how much of an insufferable narcissist you are, on a scale of 1 to Urkaa
Step 2: decide on a theme that reflects your level of basic
witch
Step 3: find a venue that can support both your dizzying notions and your love of mashed potato
Step 4: find a photographer - previous experience of taking group boys V girls shots at teenage discos a distinct advantage
Step 5: buy a madly expinsive dress that looks identical to many of your existing expinsive dresses. Ditto expinsive shoes: so so nice.
Step 6: coach your longterm partner on suitable poses to be used on the night, the aim being to appear as distant as possible. If he can make it look like ye are cousins, so much the better.
Step 7: guest list. Don't be discouraged by not having friends! Just invite any acquaintances you can think of who are the same age and nationality as yourself. Feel free to invite some of your sibling's friends to make up numbers.
Step 8: talk about it for
bleeping AGES. Seriously, tear the hole out of it. You might as well.