PTWM #164 "You’re a thief and I’m a bent, sacked copper” - Joshua Marshall; 5 January 2023

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Far and away the most popular thread title was from @chickenshopcharlie we've had a whip round via PayPal, and we've got you the REBL (without a clue) tracksuits in every colour, you're going to look so lush

Last thread recap:
- Rachaele Louise Hambleton is a massive, lying, scamming cunt
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- Joshua Marshall was dismissed without notice from Devon and Cornwall Police for improperly accessing the police database, and using a false identity to contact members of the public.
- the last thread ended with the Devon Live article detailing police officers who have been dismissed, including one which appears to fit the timeline of when Sacked Off Steve started his "career break", and the discussion amongst Tattlers carried on. It was noted that the hearing took place on 20 May, the same day which BV Babs said that her and Sloshy had been "crying in the kitchen all day" but never said why. The inclusion of the officer not being named publicly due to their mental health would also fit with the timeline of paying for an autism diagnosis for Wilbert (enabling him to claim an impact on his mental health due to having to deal with a "severely autistic" child), as well as Rumbaba making a point of saying that he had been having therapy.
- as always, whenever there is any discussion on Tattle that Robotramp doesn't like, she reverts to her old story about being trolled only on PatreCON though, because she's still "taking a break" from the normal PTWM page. This time she's got a shit hot detective on the case, who she's let onto her Patreon without paying so she can sniff out the traitors. This person apparently "caught" one over Christmas, and has messaged Rabies with details of another 2 she's found out. One had "never messaged me, just paid her money every month, but was also on Tattle", the other has an autistic son and has messaged her before, appearing really lovely, but has also been on Tattle slagging off the hallway. Neither situation actually fits the definition of trolling, as neither person has contacted her directly with malicious intent, but that won't stop old Cystitis Celia from saying one of their names on the PatreCON, and then sharing it (including the email address). Yet another round of doxing Rango, you should know by now that it's illegal
- later on, there was some more doxing, this time of someone who's "trolled constantly since 2019", but has now ordered a tracksuit just so they can complain about it which has given her the address and postcode so she can report it to the police (THAT WOULD BE THE SAME POLICE FORCE THAT SACKED YOUR HUSBAND RATSHIT).
- despite staying off social media to be more present, Rumblestrip was replying to comments on Mrs Hinch's post about her book, doing the exact same thing she is accusing others of
- one of Arsetrid's daughters has moved house, and Ramble "can't". Can't what? String a sentence together? Take a shit without filming herself? Bring her kids up? The list is endless.
- BeKind is coming home for 6 days, which makes you wonder why BV Barbara spent all that money renting a shithole dosshouse the other week to see her. On a side note, when your hideous tracksuits don't even look good on an 18 year old, it's probably time to give up.
- Queen Lateetha took a selfie in the gigantic mirror and tagged where she got her ridiculous cardigan from, didn't bother tagging her Jimmy Choo boots at just over £1000 though, did she?
- Secret Filming Stacey is at it again, with Sloshy in the car whining and picking at Seb for not having a job. His nasally voice was even more irritating than usual as he laid into his first born child because he only goes to college 3 days a week - "I was working full time at your age, then I joined the army". He went on to tell him his money will run out and "you're getting zero from us". Rancid was smirking away like the smug cunt she is. The irony of notaPC Noballs, who got the sack from the police, and now fills his days being his wife's lapdog, telling Seb (who is at college and studying) that he needs to get a job. Maybe it's Foreskin Free Fred who needs a job, so he doesn't need to bully kis kids to feel important.
- FINALLY a Facebook post, pretending to be mum of the year to Wiblet, and praising him for sleeping in his bed and using the potty. Not bad for a violent, severely autistic child
- she did a question box asking "what you want to see more of in 2023". Seeing as you asked, Thieving Thelma, we'd love to see actual proof that the money you've been scamming for years has actually gone towards anything that you said it would, and not on your collection of designer clothes, shoes and bags. Thanks, hun!
- on PatreCON, Joyce announced that "I'm a sacked, bent copper". Yes, we know. You were dismissed without notice mate, well done for admitting it. Sloshy also talked about getting trolled for "Wilby developing so much since he's been at nursery, this is the fourth kid I've raised at this age and they all develop a lot when they start nursery". Yes they do, but the change in Wilbert has been exceptional, because he was so ignored by you and your thicko wife for the first 3 years of his life. He also went off on one about someone trolling and how he has their address and is coming for them. Crack on mate, you couldn't argue your way out of a wet paper bag.
- still on Patreon, she claimed that Eat That Frog had gone (not true) and instead she wants to have a community fridge that people can come and get food from (did she not have that at the launderette?).
- while doing her make up, she said that Lula had a "really bad day" at school, wonder why that could be? Nothing at all to do with the fact her mum shared that she'd passed a blood clot "the size of a fist" and implied that she was sexually active, and possibly fell pregnant and suffered a miscarriage? Nah, definitely can't be that Bullying Barry joined in to say she's such a "dramatic crier". Or she's possibly neurodiverse, and home is her "safe place" where she can relax after masking at school all day?
- Raffle's found a new Emily! Some hun who sent her a voice note late at night, and is overwhelmed that the Patreon Saint herself replied. Run for the hills Caitlin, before you end up working in the Patchwork tat shop and babysitting the feral kids. Interestingly, she asked how trolls can say Rancho doesn't help anyone, yet in the same post says that she had "put her in touch with others". So not actually helped you herself then, has she
- Bratsy arrived home and sat outside the house obnoxiously honking her car horn. I bet the neighbours LOVED that
- there's trouble in paradise! Slosh 'n' Wrecks had a massive row, because he was banging on the door and shouting while Edie was in the shower. Oooh, big hard man, shouting at a little girl until she cries so Rumbaba was "raging" and weighed in to tell him to stop it. There seems to be a theme over the last couple of days where she's let him bully a kid, then swooped in to the rescue. Meanwhile, Edie has been bullied online by a bunch of girls so is upset about that (here's a parenting tip Ratchet Flaps - try not letting your 9 year old have unrestricted and unsupervised internet access).
- Scamela Anderson and PA Jo the doormat have come up with the lushest name for their community fridge bollocks - Patchwork Pantry they want to get a Caddy van to drive around in ("when we can afford it", looks like another raffle with no winners is incoming).
- it seems like Sock Tagging Steve is joining Ratshit for her regular loft waffling. She was "raging" because she was in bed hungry, and thought he was bringing her some food but he didn't, he just got into bed. Get your lazy arse scooting across the carpet, down the stepladder stairs, across the ugly landing, stairs and hallway, and get yourself something to eat! Fuck me, she wants us to believe she's rescuing women left, right and centre, but she can't even get herself a snack
- it's Joyce's nephew's birthday (Mannah's son), so of course old Fungus Flaps had to do several stories, all about me, me, me. My house is more fun, I bought you trainers, blah blah blah. Because "happy birthday" is never enough.
- while in a pet shop Wilberforce was looking at fish, and Bumbag Barry asked the most beautiful woman in his world whether she thought he would like a fish tank in his room. Seeing as he's in there unsupervised for hours at a time, probably best not to eh. He was carting around 2 backpacks full of Wobbler's animals - tell me you're scared of saying "no" to your son without telling me you're scared of saying "no" to your son. Some hun messaged to say "you're so lucky to be able to take him out, I could never do this with my ASD child". Which gave Exaggerating Ellie an opportunity to say that she doesn't show the difficulties, that transitions take her and Joyce, that because Isaac wa going to a party the meltdown that Wobbly had leaving the house was hideous, he scratched his face until it bled (although he must heal really bloody quick because there's not a mark on him in any of the photos or videos), and Rambo ended up crying "fat sobs", whatever the fuck that means, and Limp Dick Lionel "sat with his head in his hands". No doubt while Wilbert was still kicking the shit out of himself
- HOLD THE FRONT PAGE! Someone thanked the Snatchwork Mean Girls for their raffle prize so that makes a total of one, what about the rest from 3 different raffles?
- YTS Alan has obviously told her she needs to be more relatable, as she complained about the electricity bill having doubled. Maybe if you encouraged your family to wear some clothes once in a while, instead of wandering around in booty shorts and crop tops, you might not need the heating on to the max all the time
- Betsy brought home a whole entourage of mates ("like she's Beyonce"), who all used the shower - wonder if Limp Dick Leonard stood outside hammering on the door like he did to Edie? They went out, then all came back to stay and nicked all the cushions off the sofa.
- Wilby's doing really well with potty training, but don't ask her how because she doesn't know what to do (despite him being her 4th child) and has just let him take the lead. She started taking him into the toilet with her, because he's never "sin" anyone using the toilet, and probably thinks everyone wears nappies and is just curling out shit all over the place. Anyway, she got him involved by saying "bye bye" to Mummy's shit, and flushing the toilet. She then went on to talk about how her and Sloshy's shitting habits are different - she can only shit at home or her mum's house (even though she hasn't lived with her mum since she was 4), but Joyce prefers shitting in public toilets (we know hun, he deploys off to Sainsbury's so he doesn't have you standing outside the door with a glass up against it, trying to hear his turds hit the water, you absolute fucking freak).
- Sunday came and the gruesome twosome headed off round to Arsetrid's for a boozy, adults only lunch. Bratsy's only back for 6 days, and Ramble has missed her "so much", but she couldn't wait for dump Wilbert on her and piss off to neck wine and fizzy cat's piss with her Instagram mate.





Running total of overnight breaks away since Joyce started his career break on 15 June:
Night at Herpes Lodge (midweek)
Night in Exeter (Saturday)
Night in London (midweek)
July:
Joyce's birthday - one night at Boringdon Hall (midweek), then two nights (Friday and Saturday) in a lodge in Cornwall with Arsetrid and Simon.
October:
Herpes Lodge (weekend), night in London (mid week in half term), Friday night in Southampton
November - 2 nights in London (Sunday and Monday)
December - 5 nights in Jubai


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    Reactions: 79
    Thread Title - Excellent
    Recap - Brilliant
    Josh's face when Simon assassinated him with that James Bond comment - PRICELESS

     
    Reactions: 71
    Lovely recap @DipsyDoodle , appreciate the time it takes you to do them! Fancy being a bestselling Sunday times author?!

    One thing I wondered during her rambling about toilet training W, is she said he’d never seen anyone go to the toilet. I couldn’t breathe without my son being in my space, he’s followed me into the loo since he could crawl - what kind of sh*t parenting are they doing in that house?! W really is left to parent himself with his iPad if he doesn’t know people use the loo not a nappy!
     
    Reactions: 44
    Agreed- I can genuinely count on one hand how many times I’ve been to the loo alone since my daughter learnt how to crawl/walk/otherwise manoeuvre herself into my space
     
    Reactions: 25
    Parking, I don’t get why they don’t go to Astrids on an evening once W is in bed and leave B to just chill out at home? Then they could have spent the afternoon as a family still? It just seems a shame that she won’t be there for long and it’s a wkend then all the others are back at school? She will have B to herself once they are in school.

    I also don’t know how her and J survive spending so much time together, it’s so full on and unhealthy. I love spending the wkend as a family but we are also glad to have our own social lives.

    Another thing I was thinking about is we never see Jo’s other half, I take it she is with someone but it just seems strange that given her and R go way back, we never see her socialise with Jo and her bloke?
     
    Reactions: 46
    Brilliant recap, never disappoints!

    Cor that must have been a hell of a lot of PayPal donations to get a REBL tracksuit in every colour, the price of those monstrosities!

    Not to be ungrateful but I’d not be seen dead in them so I offered them to the local homeless shelter and they laughed in my face. They said maybe they’d use them as tents but surely no one actually wears them!
     
    Reactions: 29
    I'm just wondering why it says 25th December on the wall (or is it a clock) in Astrids House? Prerecorded they hardly fucked off on Christmas day to have a child free dinner
     
    Reactions: 9
    The filming in Arsetrid's house.....her husband is ex Met Police, probably did more important roles that PC Hedgehog and probably pissed of a lot of criminals etc. Arsetrid has already done a shit job of privacy by showing the area in which they live and now Rach has given people a house plan
    Yet again, great safeguarding
     
    Reactions: 46
    Brilliant recap and title

    I just can’t believe how thick the both are, wouldnt you lie about the dates your husband was on a “career break” when he was actually sacked

    Doesn’t take a scientist to work out the dates match up.

    Dickheads
     
    Reactions: 30
    Agreed, when mine were younger it would not be unusual for me to have 4 kids and 2 dogs watching me do my business!

    There was talk recently of W’s nursery teacher’s babysitting wasn’t there? What’s the betting that this teacher did the potty training.
     
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    Reactions: 25
    The whole shower argument about Edie. I think that's probably her deflecting blame onto Josh because she knows Edies dad won't take any of her crap. Something happened, she knows Edie will tell dad, so she does a weird Josh blame story so the spies or whoever she is paranoid about will get it back to him.
    If I was her dad I'd 100% have someone watching that shit show for me.
    ETA I think she is scared of Edies dad as she knows he can probably make moves to cause her a lot of problems.
     
    Reactions: 30
    You can really hear the disdain from Simon can't you

    it was like a pissing contest watching that, sloshy really wanted Simon to fail.

    Would love to have been a fly on the wall in astrids once they had left to hear the post meal analysis from Simon
     
    Reactions: 27
    Thanks @DipsyDoodle for recap @chickenshopcharlie excellent thread title I have tried not to look at her stories today, I have PMT (tmi) I know But I think I would literally explode hearing twit and twats voice today
     
    Reactions: 18
    Another thing I was thinking about is we never see Jo’s other half, I take it she is with someone but it just seems strange that given her and R go way back, we never see her socialise with Jo and her bloke?
    A thing I noticed the other day on her live (the day Bekind came home) was they were talking with Linda and R was telling Jo that Linda used to have long really curly hair. Jo was saying "wow, did you really?". Now correct me if I'm wrong but R runs on the narrative that her and PA Jo have been best friends since they were 5 so why would Jo not know what her Foster mother (cough) looked like when she lived with her at 15?
     
    Reactions: 32
    The filming of Arsetrids house was just weird. Did A know about it? And if she did how weird to let R post it (surely it would make content for A?).

    I want to have respect for Simple Simon but he does seem to go along with it.
     
    Reactions: 23
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