Amazin title and recap again,New thread title thanks to @Lucyinthesky88your own bogey-green tracksuit (#adbutnotanadorisit) is on the way to you, along with Joyce's jumper with bird tit down the arm!
Last thread recap:
- Racquet is a massive bleep.
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- Nail-clipping Neil made a return, trimming Wilby's nails while he was in his high chair with food in front of himcrumpet with a side of nail clippings, anyone?
- Rancho filmed Wilby running around the garden looking at the birds. She did engage with him a bit, but mostly by repeating what he was saying, and asking "do you love it". She also keeps referring to him "side eyeing" everything, you'd think a mum of 4 would know that every toddler ever has a habit of walking around not looking where they're going, but ot course for Prince Wilbert it has to be a "thing"Sloshua was looking resplendent in tight red trackies, a prison grey sweatshirt, and a baseball cap. As he explained his plans for changing things around with his bird cages, the combination of his outfit and his monotone voice made everyone's vagina close up. Nice to see him being allowed to indulge in his passion though, even if he's not allowed to go and look at wild birds any more.
- Betsy and Seb engaged in a very bizarre interaction - a trade of a back crack for a foot rub. Seb lay on the floor and Betsy straddled him and cracked his back, then he sat in front of her and she put her leg over his shoulder so he could rub her foot while she rubbed his shoulder. Very odd and uncomfortable to watch, not normal sibling behaviour (remember she says there's no step or half in their house, they're just a big happy family), and all the time Raq was filming it ready to put on the 'gram. Tattlers everywhere were creeped out by the strange display.
- The launderette is open! Only for Emily to fart around trying to do latte art, and for Rancho to talk about a toastie maker that some hun sent by accident.
- Back at the hamster cage house, Sloshy is designing himself a new shed. Ooh the excitement!
- Racquet shared the weirdest photo, taken on her phone in the stupid mirror, of herself straddling Joyce on the new footstool. Yet again, trying to prove that they love each other the hardest ever by acting like a pair of stupid teenagers
- Mangina Malcolm talked us through the plans for his new shed, which will be "near Seb's door" (that'll be the door she said was being closed up but never was), meaning it will be on the front of the house. As if the outside doesn't look like a shithole already... Reacharound could be seen holding a second phone, the one she uses to troll herself on, perhaps? She wants a pot bellied pig, is that so there's something in the house that snorts more than she does?
- Rawhide shared a quote about "if you're not kind on the internet, you're not kind". No Raq, you're definitely not kind on or off the internet
- Next up was a clip of her and Nostrils McGee talking about raising teens (what knowledge Emily has is debatable, seeing as her kid has only just started primary school). She tagged in another instatwat, who had done a post about her kid being caught with weed, and Raq had commented saying "had this so many times in the last 18 months". So how many times have YOU been caught Ratchet, and blamed it on one of the kids?
-Nice bit of non-safeguarding as she photograhed Lula and Edie asleep in bed.
- full time key worker Sloshua had yet another mid week day off, and Raq filmed herself complaining as he was shoving large bits of tree into the car. She said "if anyone came down here they'd think "they're having sex in that car", even though she was sat inside the car and Joyce was outside putting stuff in the boot. Not everyone associates being in the woods with having sneaky sex because you're having an affair Raqthen she "lives for Joyce's stories", even though they're boring as duck (this time about a man who wore a big overcoat even in summer), and his monotone voice could put anyone to sleep. Back at the Patchwork Shithole, Monotone Michael talked through his plans for the shed (and Seb's door that was being bricked up was clearly in view).
- on the sofa, Raq was still in her coat, she wanted Joyce to pretend he's an influencer and talk to the camera like she does. I cringed so hard my hole closed up!
- Rawhide went off on a drive with Arsetrid, probably cleverly organised because Astrid was featured in The Times, so would probably be getting a lot of traffic to her page. Unfortunately, Astrid abandoned her usual persona, and instead lowered herself to Rancho's level, swearing like a trooper and looking at the camera instead of the road. That'll look great for your new followers, Astrid! Over on the Patchwork tat shop page, it was shown that their road trip was to see an artist who's going to do the window for the shop. I wonder if she accepts payment in Costa vouchers and fluffy clouds?
- in a surprising twist, Racquet sat with Wilby as he played with a George Pig and encouraged him to make the dinosaur noise! He then clearly said "daddy", will that be the next word to go on a jumper?
- Ratchet went to get her eyebrows done, and uploaded an extremely unflattering photo showing off her lips that have DEFINITELY not had filler in
- then she showed a notification from Twitter about plans for dealing with internet trolls. If only you had some real trolls to worry about, Ratshit!
- her and Stabby Jo have been for a Costa, did she pay or did she use the vouchers she begged off her followers?
- some hun has made Wilbert a scrapbook of pictures of palm trees. Ok hun.
- #couplegoals Ranch and Slosh are out without kids again, with Raq filming herself berating Joyce for losing his keys. Not like she lost about 6 sets of keys for the "safe space" launderette, is it?
- busy mum of 6 and saviour Raq has been for a nap. Slosh is working lates this week, so starts at 1pm. Which she hates, because she can't deal with the kids without him. Edie is scared of the devil (but she told the exact same story on her Patreon about 2 weeks ago). She's going to reveal the date for opening the online tat shop, and has paid for the exploitative jumpers to be made. Saturday is going to be spent on a date day with Joyce, Stabby Jo is looking after the kids. Again. Then Edie came in, after being picked up from school by Sloshy, even though he was supposed to be starting work at 1pm
- She shared a message off some hun who reckons a school was "raving" about the launderette. No idea what a school would be contacting a launderette that's never open for
- Betsy's gone to a party but forgot her bra (wtf?!) so St Raq is taking it to her. What a difference to that time Seb accidentally put Isaac's trousers on and had to wear them all day at school. She later shared a photo of Betsy and her friends, and Betsy didn't appear to be wearing the bra Rack had shown
- Rancid shared a photo of herself and Slosh taken in the mirror, he was apparently on a Very Important Work Call (although he was pouting and posed perfectly to show off his £5k watch)
- she shared some CCTV footage of Betsy coming home with 2 lads in the middle of the night. Presumably the lads didn't consent to being shown on Instagram
- Yet more footage of Wilby looking at trees. He's cute, but it's exactly the same, all the time.
- Then she filmed Sloshy singing in the car, and bragging that "I bet without Shazam nobody can guess who sings this". Joyce, you're not cool or special mate, get over yourself!
- She followed up a repeat of an Iconic ad with a screenshot of an order, saying she'd influenced herself with her own discount code, and "adsoyoudontallhaveashitfit". Proving again that Tattle lives rent free in her head
- she's apparently off to the NEC this week for "work" (aka on the beg for stuff for the tat shop), will she take any of the "patchwork girls", or will full time key worker Sloshua find time in his busy shift pattern to accompany her?
- Busy mum of 6 Racquelle had a lie in, until Wilby came up the stepladder stairs seemingly by himself. Then he was shown looking out of the window and talking about various things he could see.
- Rancho showed off that she'd only fake tanned one hand, oooh she's so ditsy!
- the Clampitts are off out for a family meal, all dressed to impress in their finest tracksuits. Stabby Jo was along as well, because Rancho and PC Titwank can't be expected to entertain all 6 children by themselves, can they? In the pub, Betsy was sitting on Raq's lap, and complaining as usual. Joyce talked about when he can retire to Spain and ignore all the kids. Seb commented that Wilby's "with you for a lifetime" and Rack said "no he won't be", while Edie was shouting in the background "are we having another baby?"
- Back at the film studio/launderette, and Raq is delighted to announce that it's going to be on social media. There's a "huge small team", and they now have a deputy manager, safeguarding lead and compliance manager. Raq and Nostrils McGee have recorded a podcast which you can listen to by donating yet more money to another bleeping Patreon, with all the money going straight to the centre
it'll just "rest" in Racket's bank account on the way, I'm sure. Clips include Emily talking about her relationship with her son's father, Raq saying that she wants to talk to parents of other teens to find out whether smoking weed and having sex is normal, Emily saying that she'll say to the women in the centre that their children are arseholes, being trolled OF COURSE (on a hate site that they don't visit
- STOP THE PRESS - Rancid has gone to the Spring Fair at the NEC with Arsetrid and Stabby and NO JOYCE! I repeat NO SLOSHY! First time ever of going on a "work thing" and not dragging her wet lettuce husband along. Who's looking after the kids if childminder Stabby Jo isn't there? Is Wilby just wandering the house unsupervised in his dirty nappy, munching on firelighters n
- she shared a screenshot of a list of unanswered calls and texts from Edie (9 calls and 4 texts), spanning from 8.17am to 7pm. Showing how you're completely ignoring an 8 year old little girl, how lush is that babe. What a Cunty Claire.
- Meanwhile, over on Facebook, comedian Jason Manford posted that he wanted to donate a triple bunk bed that his kids had grown out of. Among lots of many very good suggestions of worthy causes, some huns suggested Racket, with some saying she "runs a charity", and others saying she "opened a refuge". Others then replied setting the story straight, which blew up into the usual shitshow that erupts whenever Rancid is mentioned, she was probably at home with Rescue Remedy in one hand and a joint in the other!
- Sloshua's day of being a Key Worker involved being shat on by a gull, and taking a picture of it, and then lounging in the new chair in front of the mirror, thinking he looks cool when actually he looks like a massive prick.
Photo added "because I can"
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I now need some Rescue Remedy as Im laughing and hyperventilating simultaneously
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