Pregnancy #67

[LittleMy]

38 weeks today and the “are you in labour yet” messages have begun did anyone else find their mum a bit insufferable or am I just a miserable cow?

My mum uses the baby’s name SO much in conversation that I think I now hate it and he’s not even born. I miss one video call because i’m walking the dog and I get a frantic voice note of “if you’re in labour you HAVE to tell me”. I’m scared of how overbearing she’s going to be, and it sounds awful because I know she’s excited, but it’s taking away from my excitement to have someone so in your face about it all the time.

My mum is exactly like this, it makes me dread telling her any time I’ve been pregnant (this is our third and nobody knows yet). She took the huff with us after my second son was born via elective c-section because my husband didn’t call her immediately after to let her know he was born etc. Sorry but I think he was a bit busy helping me with recovery/taking care of the baby ffs. Calling anyone wasn’t our highest priority at that moment. She’s such a critical pain in the arse too, I never told her chosen baby names until my kids were born either because she would’ve just put me right off them by being judgemental. MIL is the opposite and just happy to hear the news/doesn’t overly involve herself which I prefer tbh (although she’s got a whole lot of other issues I won’t get into).

I had my booking appointment with the midwife today and it all went well despite me not feeling so great the last few days mentally and going in sort of dreading it. Midwife was lovely and she’ll be the one I see throughout my pregnancy (last two times it was a different person almost every appointment). I have the date for my first scan in two weeks which has made us both really excited/nervous. It’s starting to feel real and I’m trying to prepare myself for telling our boys the news once that’s done.

 

[Curly]

Week 21 and I am eating like an actual animal. From someone who was repulsed by everything in the first trimester, baby boy now wants meat at every meal time + copious amounts of chocolate fingers. I’m gonna be a whale 🥲

This has been me the past few weeks. I have been soooo hungry. I have been craving fresh crispy salads with a side of sour sweets balance I suppose

 

[Luisa18]

I’ve had 3 bags of crisps today … 3 !!!!

Nowt wrong with that - baby just wanted a smorgasbord of crisps today, extending its palate.

 

[Tuesdaysdoll14]

Hi all, joining for the first time. I’m 14 weeks exactly today! Started getting bad pelvic bone pain this morning? It’s gone now but not sure if should be concerned or anything?

also did a sneak peak blood test from home at 7 weeks which came back boy. So we’ve been planning a world around our new son, calling him by his name etc and then last two scans sonographer has made comments it looks like a girl so not sure what to think. Does anyone have any experience with these at home blood tests? I didn’t wipe my arm before I attached it so now I’m worried!

 

[disneys]

Hi all - not sure if this is the right place to post. Will delete if not!

I'm 31, found out I'm pregnant 10 days ago. I'm 5+4 today. My husband and I are deciding what to do next as this is an unplanned pregnancy. We've been married 6 months; I work a stable job with decent pay, he works a day rate.

Financially, we can afford a baby without really compromising our savings goals to buy a house.

However, the emotional side is another matter. I come from a big extended family who are largely supportive (give or take the requisite drama!). My husband comes from a very small family where his father was distant and eventually abandoned the family, his mother is mentally unstable and abused him, and his brother is codependent with their mum. My husband's parents were estranged from their own families. My husband has recently (in the last 2 months) made the decision to estranged himself from his mother and brother due their ongoing abusive treatment towards him.

I was the result of an unplanned pregnancy, as my parents thought they couldn't have kids. Very much wanted and loved. My husband was planned, his brother unplanned, and obviously has a difficult relationship with 'family.'

When I found out I was pregnant, he looked shellshocked and petrified. I rushed to say we could terminate without thinking about my feelings, but we've spoken lots since and I feel excited and curious about the experience of pregnancy and being a mother. My husband feels no connection to this pregnancy, a serious concern for my health, and he feels like it's too soon.

I have poor fertility due to health issues in my early 20s, which is another consideration for us.

All of this to ask if there's anyone here who's been in a similar situation or had a partner who weren't immediately connected to their pregnancy?

Right now, my husband has said he would continue the pregnancy to make me happy, and I've asked him to think for a few days about how that would actually make him feel.

Hello lovely 🩷

I was 27 when I found out that I was unexpectedly pregnant with my son . My partner (now my husband) and I were completely shell shocked . I was on the pill , we had only just moved into our first home , and it wasn’t on the cards at all . Financially we’d just wiped ourselves out buying our first home and not where we’d wanted to be at all . Whilst I was excited and had always wanted to be a mum , my husband was very nervous and stressed coming to terms with it and working out how we’d be able to afford it

but eventually he calmed down , came around , and was the most supportive partner . After the first scan was when things really changed for him , he saw that little baby in there and told me something flipped in his brain and he didn’t know how we’d do it but he vowed we absolutely would do it for that little baby . And we have ! My son turns 7 in a few weeks and I am pregnant with our third and final baby .

our family has complications too . My husband has a difficult relationship with his father , and also his brother . And I find his mother completely overbearing ! I wonder if that and his unhappy childhood gave him more anxiety than me in those early weeks of my first pregnancy

but as you can see we’ve gone on to have one more child and now another is on the way , and neither of us would trade being parents for anything . I won’t lie to you , it has its challenging days , but it is worth it . As one poster above me said , it’s an enhancement to your life you never thought was possible . I always say to people that our lives before were like a delicious meal and having a baby was like having dessert . We didn’t need to have it , and we probably would’ve been okay without it , but my god it was so delicious and enhanced the meal in so many ways that it was absolutely worth the extra money and the slight momentary , tummy ache

it is so nerve wracking for so many reasons when you find out you’re expecting your first , especially if it wasn’t planned , but I wouldn’t change how my life has worked out for anything 🩷

 

[Bec3007]

Thanks ladies for your kind words

The emotional rollercoaster of pregnancy and parenthood is something else. Oh to be a man for a day

 

[georgiecait]

I much preferred digital notes. When I lost my first baby I had to give them my folder and it was like turning the knife in the wound

 

[Lyricallie]

Hi everyone, very excited to be joining you on here. First test the other day came out as positive and estimates are coming out about 5 1/2 weeks.

Just me and my husband know, as way too early, I don't think I'll believe it until I speak to the midwife team. I am a little bit nervous as I live in a very remote place in Scotland and right now all our papers have been full with how bad the maternity services are. Our closest proper hospital (with a maternity unit) is a 2.5h drive away

However no point worrying about something I can't change. I can't wait to tell my friends as one is a obs and gynae doctor. She's going to be sick of me messaging her lol.

I am a little bit worried as I have a bit of cramping and (tmi) brown spotting. However as it's so early I doubt there would be anything they can do. I keep doing tests to feel better and the spotting has calmed down. Looking to call the GP tomorrow and get booked in for an appointment.

Obviously I have loads of trips planned and events that I will be "not drinking for lent" at. However that excuse only lasts so long lol!

 

[yankydoo]

I’m 37w and 1d and just feeling so frustrated and fed up now.

Anyone else just not have the nesting instinct kick in at all due to pure exhaustion? I’m sleeping probably 6-7 hours a night (often broken up) and then have a further 2 or 3 naps during the day. I can’t bear the thought of doing any cleaning or washing - my husband has been doing everything. I spend the majority of my day sleeping or in extreme pelvic pain. I literally feel like I’m carrying a bowling ball on my perineum. I’m only leaving the house for hospital monitoring or midwife appointments.

I feel so incredibly guilty and like a shit parent because I can’t be bothered to even organise the nursery! I keep worrying thinking I won’t cope when baby is here because I’m so tired and unmotivated.

Somebody please tell me things will get better when I give birth!

It gets better! I was a zombie when pregnant due to the worst insomnia and generally feeling crap. I’m almost 3 weeks post partum with my second baby and I am a different person! I feel more well rested with a newborn and toddler now than I did when pregnant. My sleep is broken but it’s a proper sleep and I feel so light and like I can actually move. So please hang in there and don’t feel guilty. Also things like nursery can wait. The baby will be sleeping in your room and won’t need much at all at the beginning

 

[Elltee]

Opinions please

so since I’ve announced this pregnancy , I have been having a lot of questions from people in my life about whether or not I’m having a baby shower . I didn’t have a baby shower for either of my other two babies , no judgement to anyone who has had them and likes them but they’re just not really my thing . But it’s made me feel all warm and fuzzy that people in my life want to celebrate me and my baby and now I’m starting to think I would like to

would it be weird for me to organise like an afternoon tea with my close girlfriends , my mum , my sister etc ? Is it strange if I organise this for myself ? I don’t want to put the burden on anyone else and also if I do it , it’s stops it veering into a proper baby shower with games and stuff . I’m just not sure what’s the done thing. It feels a bit arrogant to organise something to celebrate myself

This is what I want also, just a nice meal and some good company, a baby shower is my worst nightmare as I hate any kind of attention lol.
I also think it's good to organise something yourself, you know what you like and dislike x

 

[disneys]

Just checking in to see how everyone is doing 🫶

I’m 11 weeks today and there is light at the end of the first trimester tunnel . I’m feeling more energised (though still ready for bed at 7.30) , less sick . We’ve had our dating scan through and it’s on 6th May I’m feeling really anxious about it even though we saw a heartbeat at 7w4d and my symptoms have continued to be strong and present . But I know this anxiety never goes away … just got to roll with it

 

[disneys]

For those who drank the raspberry leaf tea, do you think it helped? Looking to hopefully have a VBAC so researching as much as I can and see so many mixed reviews on it

I started drinking it at around 34 weeks in my second pregnancy as I wanted a VBAC . Whether it helped or not it’s hard to say , but I did manage to have a VBAC and am hoping for another vaginal birth this time around . I also did some of the stretching massages . I did tear a bit but compared to the recovery from a c section it was bliss

 

[Lyricallie]

@Lyricallie 2.5 hours away from a hospital gives me heart palpitations, the A road to our hospital is closed from the start of June over night until the second week of June and I’ve already armed my husband with 5 different ways to get to the hospital XD

Couldn’t sleep again last night, so I sat up and painted my nails. At least I have nice nails now.

Haha tell me about it! I literally haven’t even given the actual birth bit much thought as I’m still so focussed on the actual getting there nonsense. My own fault for working in the arse end of nowhere ha. But at least the air is fresh

———-
I think I’m actually starting to get a bit of a bump and I’m so excited. I can’t wait to start feeling them kicking. Consultant appointment today but I think it’ll just be around upping my thyroid medication so hopefully not too scary!

 

[WeepingCassandra]

@f0xmulder first of all, sending hugs! It is a huge moment whether you’re planning, trying or it just happens out of the blue and it’s totally valid to have lots of different emotions. You don’t have to answer but - Before you got married did you talk about kids much? What do you on a personal level want and where do kids sit in that? Did your husband see you having children at any point?

You’ve got the benefit of finding out early on, and the other added benefit that you’re with someone you love who obviously cares for you and your wellbeing. 10 days is very early days to take on this news particularly if you weren’t expecting it.

I must admit, with my first we weren‘t preventing but we were shocked at how fast it happened and it took me a good long time to get my head around being pregnant and how my life was going to change. 3.5 years on and toddlerWC is my whole world.

The way I describe having kids to my friends who aren’t sure - before we had ToddlerWC, our life was comfortable and safe. We could’ve carried on the same path, no issues and we’d have had a lovely life together. But having him added extra to our life, it didn’t take it away. It’s like having an extra room unlocked that gives you access to so much more (but also sometimes punches you in the face, because lets not lie and say it’s easy having kids, they have an uncanny knack of pushing all your buttons!).

 

[OOOOR]

It’s so shit when the food aversions hit! I’ve basically been living off of bread and butter. I felt so guilty as we had all these hello fresh meals. Husband just had them for lunch and dinner haha. I’m sure your husband understands and more leftovers for the family haha.

The food aversions are DIRE. My baby has so far been made entirely out of full fat coca cola and crackers

 

[Gossipgal.x]

Morning girls. I’m 12w4d and got my NHS scan this week I’m so nervous for it. I’ve already had 4 scans privately but I’m so anxious for this one, especially the downs and Edward testing

 

[OOOOR]

It sounds so stupid I know because I’m creating a whole new life but I’m really struggling with the thought of weight gain this pregnancy. Before I found out, I’d lost 3 stone in a year and finally started feeling good about myself. I weighed myself today and at 36 weeks I’ve gained 11-12lbs which I know is pretty good going considering but the thought of feeling so crap about myself after birth scares me, especially in the lead up to summer as well.

I could have written this myself. Had a big ol’ cry today because I feel so awful in my body, am constantly hungry and feel faint at any minor exertion and I just know i’m going to feel horrendous by full term. All we can do is keep telling ourselves we’re creating life and our body isn’t really our own right now!
I often feel bad because I wanted nothing more than to get pregnant and as soon as I did my mental health went in the bin and i’ve been unhappy the whole time.

I hope you’re able to give yourself some grace, and know that you’ll lose the baby weight and have your old body back soon

 

[Bec3007]

Feeling so mentally crap the last few days. I’m currently quite overdue now and absolutely nothing is happening except horrific lightning crotch which has been going on for weeks and cramps here and there. I was induced the first time round and wanted to avoid it this time but it’s looking very likely. Feels pathetic saying it but I feel like my body is just failing me.

 

[WeepingCassandra]

Turns out last weeks palava was highly likely to just be another fucking UTI (that’s the 4th one in 2 months I think) and I’ve got thrush again.

I couldn't sleep at all last night, too hot, fell asleep out of exhaustion at about 2am and woke up at 6:45am when toddler started shouting. If I go back to sleep now I won’t be able to sleep tonight (even though it’s only just gone 8am).

Toddlers and our room were already 29 degrees last night.

 

[polkadotsandleopardprint]

Hi all! Just plonking myself in here (albeit tentatively at the moment) as I found out last Tuesday that I'm pregnant for the first time after my period was a no-show. According to the date of my last period the app I've downloaded has me at 5 weeks and 3 days. I'm desperately trying not to get too excited as I'm so conscious of something bad happening.

Since finding out last week, I've had a fair few symptoms including an evening of nausea, breathlessness when doing the simplest things like just going up the stairs, but the absolute worst part is the insane bloating!

I'm no skinny-mini at size 14/16 but going out and about this weekend I found it so hard to find something semi-flattering and/or comfortable! Really hope the bloating goes down as I'm seeing friends and family next week and dreading deciding what clothes to take! My friends are all going to guess right away anyway as I love my wine so as soon as they see me glugging water instead of wine it'll give the game away