Eek! Would switching to a tongue scraper for a single sweeping motion help? Or maybe laying off the tongue scrubbing for extra time swishing mouthwash about? I’ve been ok with teeth cleaning, but crazy acts like bending over to pick something up/loading the dishwasher after eating is very risky business for me. Bodies are wild!Anyone else struggling with brushing their teeth at night? In the first tri it was doing my back teeth that would set me off retching and now I can do those but I struggle so much with my tongue. Then I retch so much I’m actually sick a bit - completely voiding the tooth brushing I just did
Pregnancy #64
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It’s so odd. I’m definitely more retchy with this baby than my first. And wow the changing in my bump - one day I’ll not feel anything and the next day I look 7 months pregnant. It’s wild! Tongue scraper is a good idea. I don’t actually die mouthwash - my dentist said they’re overhyped unless you need to use cordosyl for a few days because of medical reasons.
I could have written this. I’m from the TTC thread and found out last week I am expecting after over a year of trying. After finding out, and initially being overjoyed, it’s like I’ve sunk into a state of despair and doom that I cannot shake and I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me. My family is thrilled, my partner is thrilled and deep down I know this is what I want but I am also conscious that my life as it was was perfect, which is all about to change, and I just have this overwhelming feeling of dread like I’ve made a huge mistake. I’m trying to give myself a break over it and realise that right now my body is being pumped with a tit tonne of hormones. The rational part of my brain knows that everything will be fine and this is what I wanted, but the moments of panic are very real and make me feel so guilty
Welcome! And congratulations! It is scary. Somehow it feels scarier when it’s all you’ve focussed your brain on for 18 months or more. And when you don’t feel deliriously happy you feel like you’re letting your buddies from the TTC thread who are waiting for their two lines down or something. But you’re not! You’re allowed to feel whatever you need to, there’s so much at play here, hormones being a major one. I’m grateful every day for my miracle little pomegranate, but it doesn’t mean I’m not also tired, a bit scared, overwhelmed and wondering how I make all the ‘life’ things work in the future.
Oh, congrats! Probably sounds very weird, but I had noticed you over on the TTC thread (fellow Irish person) recently! I had wondered if those little twinges were indeed going to lead to a BFP as hadn't seen you post more recently!!
I've been a lurker over on that thread for some months. Joining this one to my own massive surprise now and still very much feeling I'm jinxing it by doing that.
My own story, briefly. 37, been with my partner long term but for various life reasons, didn't start trying until last summer. Sort of immediately just knew there were going to be issues. Been berating myself for not trying years earlier. Got referred to the HSE Fertility Hub due to very low AMH (which I absolutely sprialled over), my age. Got my appointment, which was all of five minutes and the doctor basically just read out the forms we had filled out back to us. My partner's sperm count and motility were both great, morphology only 2%, but she just told him to take Proceive (and from Googling, I believe morphology is the least concerning of the sperm factors). We were told we'd be straight to ICSI but I needed to drop weight (which I knew was the criteria in advance but most frustrating and discriminatory I feel). Had already started that process but very slow progress. So I was dispatched with a business card with a phone number and told to ring that when I'd hit the weight goal and would be booked in for a scan to start the process. Found it really odd that no scan was done in the initial appointment to check for any anatomical issues.
That was mid February. Went off and started to be more aggressive with my diet and exercise (yet have still only dropped about 11/12 pounds). Now seem to have fallen pregnant naturally in my March cycle. I noticed a weird cramping (implantation?) pain which I had never experienced before one evening and checking the dates I was thinking "it couldn't be happening, could it?!". Did my usual pregnancy test on the day my period was due and my partner actually came into the loo (we were running late for something) and looked at it before me and told me there was definitely a faint cross! I actually thought he was winding me up as I had sort of just resigned myself to not ever seeing one. I do think I may have been ovulating earlier than my apps were telling me/not ovulating regularly. Clinic didn't seem interested in looking into any of that before referring me straight for IVF, interestingly.
Anyway, had a bit of fatigue and some aches, sore boobs for a few days after the positive test (at 4 weeks 2 days). But since about week 5, I literally have zero symptoms and it is really causing me so much anxiety. I am 7 weeks 4 days today and I do not feel remotely any different to my usual self. I've been trying to reassure myself that this can be totally normal, but I just can't help thinking that it's all too good to be true and it must be a MMC. Have my first scan at 10 weeks with Consultant.
Woops, apologies for the thesis!
Ah massive congrats to you too! That’s fabulous newsOh, congrats! Probably sounds very weird, but I had noticed you over on the TTC thread (fellow Irish person) recently! I had wondered if those little twinges were indeed going to lead to a BFP as hadn't seen you post more recently!!
I've been a lurker over on that thread for some months. Joining this one to my own massive surprise now and still very much feeling I'm jinxing it by doing that.
My own story, briefly. 37, been with my partner long term but for various life reasons, didn't start trying until last summer. Sort of immediately just knew there were going to be issues. Been berating myself for not trying years earlier. Got referred to the HSE Fertility Hub due to very low AMH (which I absolutely sprialled over), my age. Got my appointment, which was all of five minutes and the doctor basically just read out the forms we had filled out back to us. My partner's sperm count and motility were both great, morphology only 2%, but she just told him to take Proceive (and from Googling, I believe morphology is the least concerning of the sperm factors). We were told we'd be straight to ICSI but I needed to drop weight (which I knew was the criteria in advance but most frustrating and discriminatory I feel). Had already started that process but very slow progress. So I was dispatched with a business card with a phone number and told to ring that when I'd hit the weight goal and would be booked in for a scan to start the process. Found it really odd that no scan was done in the initial appointment to check for any anatomical issues.
That was mid February. Went off and started to be more aggressive with my diet and exercise (yet have still only dropped about 11/12 pounds). Now seem to have fallen pregnant naturally in my March cycle. I noticed a weird cramping (implantation?) pain which I had never experienced before one evening and checking the dates I was thinking "it couldn't be happening, could it?!". Did my usual pregnancy test on the day my period was due and my partner actually came into the loo (we were running late for something) and looked at it before me and told me there was definitely a faint cross! I actually thought he was winding me up as I had sort of just resigned myself to not ever seeing one. I do think I may have been ovulating earlier than my apps were telling me/not ovulating regularly. Clinic didn't seem interested in looking into any of that before referring me straight for IVF, interestingly.
Anyway, had a bit of fatigue and some aches, sore boobs for a few days after the positive test (at 4 weeks 2 days). But since about week 5, I literally have zero symptoms and it is really causing me so much anxiety. I am 7 weeks 4 days today and I do not feel remotely any different to my usual self. I've been trying to reassure myself that this can be totally normal, but I just can't help thinking that it's all too good to be true and it must be a MMC. Have my first scan at 10 weeks with Consultant.
Woops, apologies for the thesis!
It’s a lot to comprehend isn’t it. Granted I’m literally 3 seconds pregnant but I’m not really having many symptoms either. After what I think was implantation cramping which lasted about an afternoon, my body has gone completely silent on me and I feel nothing at all. My mood has taken the biggest hit, but physically I feel nothing at all. The odd twinge here and there but I said to my partner yesterday that I felt more ‘pregnant’ when I wasn’t pregnant as I was always complaining about bloating or some kind of cramping or pain. If anything my stomach looks flatter now than ever (still have a bit of a pouch of course lol) but I’m now realising that what I always assumed was IBS was actually PMS, and since finding out I’m preggers my symptoms have gone into hiding completely. I’m expecting things to ramp up as time goes on but right now I feel nothing at all. I’m like, shouldn’t my uterus be stretching and stuff? Shouldn’t I feel the placenta start to grow?! How is it normal to feel not one single thing, apart from feeling like want to murder everyone in sight
I did say it to my doc and she said that it’s entirely possible to go through many weeks and not feel anything at all. There’s a reason why so many women don’t realise they’re pregnant for months so try not to overthink it
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Moved my GP appointment to today as I had a rough rough weekend mental health wise. She was really good and is going to see about a referral to the perinatal MH team and reassured me about my meds. I mentioned that I'd had some spotting and cramping yesterday and the day before (which suspect is nothing) but she told me to call the EPAU anyway for reassurance so now I'm waiting for a triage call back from them after an hour trying to get through, they said it'd be before 6 
oh well
oh well
Not sure if this is the right thread.
I’m 28 and fell pregnant unexpectedly. I think I’m about 5 weeks? I’m in a 2.5 year relationship. We’ve made our decision to abort but we are both absolutely heartbroken.
We don’t earn loads of money. My partner earns less than me. He’s had financial difficulties in the past and has only just found a job he likes, with possibilities to move up in the future.
We rent a tiny one bedroom flat in an expensive area. We still have a temporary sofa, and wardrobes without doors. We have been using our money to slowly build the flat up.
We don’t see a way we can make it work. If we move to a cheaper area, we lose what little support system we already have.
Sadly our families can’t support us financially.
Partners paternity package is appalling (2 weeks statutory pay) and mine is 8 weeks full pay and then 16 weeks half pay.
We can’t live off just one of our salaries or even part of our salaries. We’d have to have the baby straight into childcare which is horrible anyway, and we couldn’t afford. We can’t really afford anywhere bigger just yet.
I completely understand and agree, but I’m so resentful and upset at the state of the world. We both work full time and we can’t afford to have a child - it’s so unfair.
We wanted the time to be exciting and not stressful.
My partner suggested that we spend the next year or two taking it really seriously and saving money so that we are better prepared. He said we set a deadline (say, two years time) and even if we are in the same position, we start trying again anyway. At least we will be prepared.
I am so heartbroken and just wanted to vent I guess..
I’m 28 and fell pregnant unexpectedly. I think I’m about 5 weeks? I’m in a 2.5 year relationship. We’ve made our decision to abort but we are both absolutely heartbroken.
We don’t earn loads of money. My partner earns less than me. He’s had financial difficulties in the past and has only just found a job he likes, with possibilities to move up in the future.
We rent a tiny one bedroom flat in an expensive area. We still have a temporary sofa, and wardrobes without doors. We have been using our money to slowly build the flat up.
We don’t see a way we can make it work. If we move to a cheaper area, we lose what little support system we already have.
Sadly our families can’t support us financially.
Partners paternity package is appalling (2 weeks statutory pay) and mine is 8 weeks full pay and then 16 weeks half pay.
We can’t live off just one of our salaries or even part of our salaries. We’d have to have the baby straight into childcare which is horrible anyway, and we couldn’t afford. We can’t really afford anywhere bigger just yet.
I completely understand and agree, but I’m so resentful and upset at the state of the world. We both work full time and we can’t afford to have a child - it’s so unfair.
We wanted the time to be exciting and not stressful.
My partner suggested that we spend the next year or two taking it really seriously and saving money so that we are better prepared. He said we set a deadline (say, two years time) and even if we are in the same position, we start trying again anyway. At least we will be prepared.
I am so heartbroken and just wanted to vent I guess..
I'm so sorry, this is just heartbreaking for you. Sounds like you both have a good head on to make the decision that is right for you. Sending love
oh love. I can’t even begin to imagine the anguish. You are right, it isn’t fair. If you have discussed all your options and been open and honest then you’ve come to the right conclusion for you as a couple. I terminated a pregnancy when I was about 19. I was on the pill and it failed. I was absolutely not ready to become a mother so young. I don’t regret it (I lived a pretty superb life afterwards) so I wanted to reassure you that should you be in a better place in 2 years, your termination will not affect your fertility. It was one of the first questions I asked my gp when we were deciding to start a family a few years ago. Someone much smarter than me may be able to advise you financially but I am so sorry that your hand has felt forced. Sending you so much love
I really hope you are ok and it sounds like you have your partners support and your decision is solely your decision
I’d look into grants / sure start / child support as I know if you are on a lower income they can claim other benefits as well as SMP for in the future xx
I am so sorry I can't even imagine how you must be feeling and this is so heartbreaking. It seems like you've really thought everything through to make the decision that's right for you at this time. Also sending love
@ahtisyourself my period was 7 days late and I had zero symptoms. I was just angry that my cycle appeared to be ducked. I did tests through the week, all negative (I now understand it was too early). I don’t even know why I tested on the Sunday when I got my positive, I think I was probably torturing myself! Initially I had some minor cramps which were less severe than period cramps and nothing else. Next came a wild tiredness, I’d be asleep on the sofa at 8pm. Then came the more classic tender boobs and nausea and what have you later on.
@anonesk223 hello and welcome. My heart really goes out to you and your partner. You’ve clearly given this a lot of thought, I just want to say that your local CAB would be able to run a check for any possible benefits you’d be entitled to and/or help find grants for furniture etc, or whether you’d had any entitlement to apply to your local authority for housing/support with housing. I don’t know anything about your situation and I am not prying, nor do I want to come across as a random person trying to make you change your mind. Just, if you weren’t aware they can do this, I wanted to make you aware. They can do something called ‘what if’ calculations so they can check your entitlement based on your situation as a couple and your situation if you had a child. And pretty much any and every scenario you could think of. But, again, you’ve clearly spent a lot of time considering this and it’s obviously been so hard. You have my love and support
@lilykestrel thanks for the update, I’ve been thinking about you! I’m glad your GP has been supportive. It’s always ok to phone the EPU. It’s their job to triage and decide whether to see you or not, and they can’t do that unless you call. Hope all is ok.
I’ve had complete baby brain today. I’ve left my work laptop at work. Which is an hour’s drive away. I was SO looking forward to working from home tomorrow, having a bit of a lie in/gentle start to the day. Wearing pyjamas. I’m flying solo this week as Mr DN is away for work so I had arranged two working from home days to make my life easier and now I’ve buggered up my chance of one of them, and re-added a two hour round commute to my day
I also think I left a Vinted parcel full of baby clothes in my office. Which isn’t a big deal but I wanted to admire them! 18 weeks tomorrow. I don’t hold out much hope that my brain can survive till my Mat Leave kicks in. Which I still haven’t figured out. Pahhhhhj.
@anonesk223 hello and welcome. My heart really goes out to you and your partner. You’ve clearly given this a lot of thought, I just want to say that your local CAB would be able to run a check for any possible benefits you’d be entitled to and/or help find grants for furniture etc, or whether you’d had any entitlement to apply to your local authority for housing/support with housing. I don’t know anything about your situation and I am not prying, nor do I want to come across as a random person trying to make you change your mind. Just, if you weren’t aware they can do this, I wanted to make you aware. They can do something called ‘what if’ calculations so they can check your entitlement based on your situation as a couple and your situation if you had a child. And pretty much any and every scenario you could think of. But, again, you’ve clearly spent a lot of time considering this and it’s obviously been so hard. You have my love and support
@lilykestrel thanks for the update, I’ve been thinking about you! I’m glad your GP has been supportive. It’s always ok to phone the EPU. It’s their job to triage and decide whether to see you or not, and they can’t do that unless you call. Hope all is ok.
I’ve had complete baby brain today. I’ve left my work laptop at work. Which is an hour’s drive away. I was SO looking forward to working from home tomorrow, having a bit of a lie in/gentle start to the day. Wearing pyjamas. I’m flying solo this week as Mr DN is away for work so I had arranged two working from home days to make my life easier and now I’ve buggered up my chance of one of them, and re-added a two hour round commute to my day
I also think I left a Vinted parcel full of baby clothes in my office. Which isn’t a big deal but I wanted to admire them! 18 weeks tomorrow. I don’t hold out much hope that my brain can survive till my Mat Leave kicks in. Which I still haven’t figured out. Pahhhhhj.I’m 7 weeks now and the nausea has hit my like a train. Having a 1 year old and being in the first trimester is so rough, getting signed off tomorrow for 2 weeks and praying for some good anti sickness meds too 🥲
I've just had a bit of emotional breakdown this evening I am just feeling very overwhelmed. People keep making comments about my bump and how I'm not showing much etc etc, like I know people aren't meaning harm by these comments but it's adding to my anxiety that there is something wrong with the baby. Even my osteopath today though was like have your midwives said anything about the size of the baby as you haven't got much of a bump. Rationally everything was developing fine at my 20 week scan and I am naturally quite petite anyway my next midwife appointment is Friday, I am 25 weeks now and I know everyone shows differently as well.
And I went to put some pyjamas on this evening and nothing fits which isn't in the wash so that just started me off crying.
Also I find everyone keeps asking me questions about the baby and what we've got what we still need to get etc and never my partner which is just frustrating
This is a pointless post I just needed to let it all out sorry! Ah mental health and hormones are fun!
And I went to put some pyjamas on this evening and nothing fits which isn't in the wash so that just started me off crying.
Also I find everyone keeps asking me questions about the baby and what we've got what we still need to get etc and never my partner which is just frustrating
This is a pointless post I just needed to let it all out sorry! Ah mental health and hormones are fun!
31 weeks and I am so ready to just give birth I love pregnancy but I also just want to meet my baby now!
side note - when can I start drinking raspberry leaf tea? Is it okay to start from 32 weeks?
I love pregnancy but I also just want to meet my baby now!side note - when can I start drinking raspberry leaf tea? Is it okay to start from 32 weeks?
I hear you and I feel the same! I’m 23 weeks and not showing a great deal and people comment on how small the bump is which makes you worry!I've just had a bit of emotional breakdown this evening I am just feeling very overwhelmed. People keep making comments about my bump and how I'm not showing much etc etc, like I know people aren't meaning harm by these comments but it's adding to my anxiety that there is something wrong with the baby. Even my osteopath today though was like have your midwives said anything about the size of the baby as you haven't got much of a bump. Rationally everything was developing fine at my 20 week scan and I am naturally quite petite anyway my next midwife appointment is Friday, I am 25 weeks now and I know everyone shows differently as well.
And I went to put some pyjamas on this evening and nothing fits which isn't in the wash so that just started me off crying.
Also I find everyone keeps asking me questions about the baby and what we've got what we still need to get etc and never my partner which is just frustrating
This is a pointless post I just needed to let it all out sorry! Ah mental health and hormones are fun!
I don’t think anyone should comment on the size of the bump small, big, normal anything!!!
Sending love and hope you feel better tomorrow
Thank you and i'm sorry you've been experiencing this too! I completely agree people shouldn't comment on size at all and I always find it weird they feel the need to!
I know I'm just tired and emotional but Its hard not to worry, I wish I could just see inside sometimes and check that she's doing ok in there!
I know I'm just tired and emotional but Its hard not to worry, I wish I could just see inside sometimes and check that she's doing ok in there!
Saaaaaaame! I want to try do everything to get baby here on time this time. First time I was 42+1. I’m going to do it all- raspberry leaf tea, dates, colostrum harvesting, sex. But going to wait until 38 weeks as my husband is on a golf trip just before then!31 weeks and I am so ready to just give birth
side note - when can I start drinking raspberry leaf tea? Is it okay to start from 32 weeks?
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