Office Gossip

[Justwishfulthinking]

This thread is brilliant x

 

[Reverend]

I did organise a leaving do for a female colleague, and we got a (male) kiss-a-gram in. The female colleague loved it, as did everyone else in the room. However, my Vice-Chancellor worked through the door to say goodbye to the lady, and looked startled when he saw her oiling down a muscular guy. I suddenly thought 'Oh shit, I'm fired!' , but then he started laughing uproariously!

 

[Reverend]

I need the Tea on these ones !!

There were two types. I went on 4 that was mainly 16-21 year olds ( that was my age at the time), and I also did 3 that had 20-40 age range.

The former was alcohol fuelled and on-fire teenage hormones(mine included). Basically quite a lot of bed swapping went on, and the conductor of the band said he was going to write a book about some of the stuff we got up to and waiting to see what happened 9 months after the tour (although I don;t remember any pregnancies, but i wouldn't have been surprised!).

The second was alcohol, drugs (mostly E and charlie - although as I suffer from depression and anxiety I didn't do anything other than alcohol) and a fair bit of bed-swapping including people who were married and the partners weren't with them. That said, the final tour I did was horrible. There was a lot of bullying ( i got a bit of that, but wasn't the only one), and I started seeing people in their late 30's and 40's getting drunk and falling into swimming pool, and i thought that that is beginning to look very tragic. I quit after that, and didn't look back.

 

[HubIreLovesMnD]

There were two types. I went on 4 that was mainly 16-21 year olds ( that was my age at the time), and I also did 3 that had 20-40 age range.

The former was alcohol fuelled and on-fire teenage hormones(mine included). Basically quite a lot of bed swapping went on, and the conductor of the band said he was going to write a book about some of the stuff we got up to and waiting to see what happened 9 months after the tour (although I don;t remember any pregnancies, but i wouldn't have been surprised!).

The second was alcohol, drugs (mostly E and charlie - although as I suffer from depression and anxiety I didn't do anything other than alcohol) and a fair bit of bed-swapping including people who were married and the partners weren't with them. That said, the final tour I did was horrible. There was a lot of bullying ( i got a bit of that, but wasn't the only one), and I started seeing people in their late 30's and 40's getting drunk and falling into swimming pool, and i thought that that is beginning to look very tragic. I quit after that, and didn't look back.

Wow that's mad, was it brass bands you were with or Orchestras ?

 

[HubIreLovesMnD]

The famous quote from Alyson Hannigan in American Pie? Yep! It has happened!

Have to be honest, that I did take advantage of a few clarinet players more than once, but they didn't complain!

Is clarinet player a euphamism !!

 

[Tublet83]

My husbands work alway used to have great Christmas parties.

The chief exec turned up one year and stayed for a few drinks, during that an admin assistant gave him a lap dance (and the chief exec later said that he never wanted to be in the same room as her again), another member of staff vomited in the Christmas buffet and the behaviour was generally so banned they were banned from having parties again in this particular hotel

 

[Book]

My work place is full of shall we say characters I can’t name a manager to date that hasn’t had their sticky fingers in the till so to speak. Last one kept doing it in when I took over leaving me wide open to blame. I had enough told him and our witchy supervisor that I new what was going on and it better stop involving me. Supervisor who previously hated manager but always crawls up the arses of management by apparently being soooo professional was also doing it and making me take over from her too, leaving me in any firing line. Anyways I told them and she went like a robot and started saying deny deny deny deny over and over to the point I thought she was having a seizure. Manager tried sucking up to me txting me n stuff erm no thankyou. Anyway he got sacked eventually think supervisor helped that along the sly old witch but good riddance just wish her sly mask would slip Manger was also buying cocaine and weed from other staff members got himself into debt with other staff never dared asked me for money though Another manager allowed a staff member to bring her crop in and store it in a cupboard stunk the whole bloody place outOh also the manger I first spoke about was having some sordid affair with some poor bloke that was a resident with alcoholism and got soo drunk with him one time tried his luck to far with him and they ended up fighting on my shift. Manager then moved in with this poor bloke who eventually checked himself into rehab. Manger told me he had been told by poor blokes councillor that he was abusing said alcoholic and taking advantage.I thought yeh damn right you are. Anyways I have loads more crazy weird place I work

 

[Mulholland Drive]

Oh the post Xmas party shame/fear. Walking back into the office is a treat. I do this to myself all too often. I never frigging learn.

I noticed this everytime the company I worked for would re-open after the Christmas break. All those drunk men & women, snogging and/or shagging during the party festivities, looked decidedly sheepish on the first day back into the office and had to do the "walk of shame" back to their desks.

Some of them were probably embarrassed at who they got involved with at the party (the beer goggles effect, lol)
And some were keenly aware that if they weren't shagging someone, they were gobbing off with some very choice words/indiscreet stories about some of their colleagues. Which obviously was digested and stored away by the office gossips for later.

Obviously, I was not included in such sordid/debauched/salacious activities

 

[CherryAcid]

She is probably very forward and direct, and some men like that.

The trouble is that unlike women, men are a lot superficial and once past 30's many men aren't interested in having a relationship with someone over 40. Yes, there is the cougar thing, but often those don't last.

I had a boss like this, she wasnt much to look at but she was so cringingly forward with men she would be fighting them off.

 

[Reverend]

This is just awful but it provided so much gossip for ages.

A woman joined our office. On her very first day, she told one of the quieter guys in the office that she was unhappy in her marriage and loathed having children, and asked whether he wanted to make her an offer. I kid you not. She said this to him in the kitchen, in front of several people. She hadn't even been introduced to him!

He took up with her "for fun"; when she became clingy and annoying he distanced himself from her, at which point she threatened to tell his wife about them if he didn't leave her. He thought she was bluffing so didn't do a thing; next thing, his wife turned up at work with all his clothes and personal effects, called him from the carpark and told him to go to the window, and then proceeded to drive over everything, back and forth ... ruining everything in the process. He didn't have anywhere else to go so moved in with the fling at this point.

Fast forward a couple of years and several of us had left this place of employment by that stage, but several people still kept in contact with the guy. It turned out that the woman seemed intent on ruining his life for goodness knows what reason. Not only did she break up his marriage and pretty much halt any sort of contact he had with his kids, but she also framed him for embezzlement (at this point, they were running a small business together). He actually served time and because he can't prove his innocence, he is stuck with a record. He does have a job, but because of his criminal history his professional reputation is in tatters.

This woman, meanwhile, has gone on to marry someone who used to be one of the managers at our old place of employment, who was fully aware of all that happened - how stupid is he?! This woman has a certain prowess that men find hypnotic; it'll be only a matter of time before she ruins this guy's life too for whatever reason she dreams up, and moves on to her next victim. So far she's been married 3 times and has 4 children, who she never sees. And she's only mid-30s!

She is NOT attractive, which is the weird part! She is quite short and dumpy-looking, but wears shortish skirts and matching (tight) suit jackets and extremely high heels with black stockings - it's her uniform. She has this air of arrogance about her and wears her hair super short - not cute and pixie-like; more frumpy-and-I-don't-care style. She doesn't even wear make-up. Sorry if this all sounds bitchy but I just do not get what men see in her. If she was gorgeous I would absolutely understand.

She is probably very forward and direct, and some men like that.

The trouble is that unlike women, men are a lot superficial and once past 30's many men aren't interested in having a relationship with someone over 40. Yes, there is the cougar thing, but often those don't last.

 

[Reverend]

I used to work with a lady who would phone in sick nearly every Friday and every Monday which really annoyed the team as we were on a roster to mind Reception when she was on her breaks and off work (they were reluctant to get temps in because they cost too much). It was obvious she was hung over or just couldn't be bothered coming into work on those days, which made everyone's feelings towards her worse (she was a nice lady but was just there to collect her pay and really didn't want to be there). She had been with this organisation for 20+ years and had friends in very high places so getting rid of her wasn't an option.

I had someone in my office like that. I was her supervisor, but not her manager. The others got more and more annoyed with her, and one week when I was away an almighty row broke out, with two people walking out. Unbelievably, the day after I got back in, the manager sent for me, and said to me to find out what happened!!!! He'd been there the whole time, just couldn't be bothered to do anything!

 

[Petulant_vlogger]

I used to work in a pub and literally everyone was shagging in the cellar. It was such an inbred place

No comment on whether I participated

Oh yes! Cellars are a great place. I would NOT recommend a walk in freezer however. It gets cold very quickly

 

[Giggling Squid]

My workplace is so dull!! There’s been the occasional inappropriate kiss at a work do but aside from that, nothing! Either that, or they’re particularly good at hiding it my industry is very male dominated so I think it’s probably the latter

 

[HowlOwl]

I worked for a photocopier company and there were so many affairs going on, that a prankster sent home a flyer with their weekly sales results etc (all paper-based in those days), with photos of various male/female members of staff and the caption, “Who’s zooming who?” (borrowed from the copier zoom term). This did not go down well with spouses or partners, as you can imagine!

 

[Flowergirl14]

My boss at a previous company stole £1m, I had no idea and thought he was a good guy. Another worked in customer services, and credited his credit card with customer refunds, was discovered after 6 weeks after month end reconciliations. He had a drink problem. In another company, a manager credited dummy dealers and paid himself their commissions, got 2 years in prison. A colleague told told me about, a former colleague whose husband bought her an Audi etc, turned out he was fiddling the company and had told her it was work bonuses. Divorce swiftly followed!

 

[chandlercheesecake]

When I was doing an apprenticeship in an office, I walked in on my office mate (30 year old woman) looking at a porn website.

When I worked in a warehouse there were loads of rumours of affairs, and girls offering managers BJs in exchange for progressing further in the company. Nobody ever said any names though so I never found out who.

There was one manager that was quite predatory towards young foreign girls. He got reported a few times for walking up to girls and hugging them. I remember there was this new girl who was quite upset about something, so he took her out to the yard to console her. Just thought it was a bit creepy. He also looked exactly like Derek Zoolander.

When I did nights at a supermarket, there was a manager that kept implying that the team leader did cocaine in the toilets during her shifts. He would say stuff about it in a jokey way. I remember thinking her pupils were always dilated, so it could be true.

 

[Hinchhater1442]

My first office shin dig, straight out of college, I’d only worked there approx. 2 months and it was a leaving do for a couple that worked on the team.
Long story short, I upset the female half of the couple as she felt I was flirting with the boyfriend she was just about to spent 3 months travelling with except instead I ended up going home with the team leader who unknowingly to me had a girlfriend.. they’re married now

 

[Flowergirl14]

This is my favourite thread! More gossip please!!

 

[HubIreLovesMnD]

Wind bands ( which are brass bands, with stuff like Clarinets, Saxophones, etc. added on).

That is so funny in a way.
You would not expect clarinet and bassoon players to be debauched bed-hoppers!

It's like the band camp from American Pie!

 

[Belulah]

What? 'I made money from men's indecent acts towards me'?

I bumped into her in a bar she farted over and asked if I worked at the establishment. When I said she did she said “I’m the girl whose arse was smacked by VP!”
My friend who had worked there for a long time said she had been very proud of the whole thing. VP was married at the time.