watermelon sugar
VIP Member
I used to work in a pub and literally everyone was shagging in the cellar. It was such an inbred place
No comment on whether I participated
No comment on whether I participated
- Notice
Holidaybobs
VIP Member
At my first job when I was 18, there was the usual shagging and dick pics sent around. One woman was having an affair with her friends partner and she used to sit with her as she would cry about him. She had an idea he was cheating but, had no proof. Little did she know the bitch who was comforting her was shagging her bf in the disabled toilets.
In my job after that a very high up lawyer got caught pulling himself off by a porter in the reprographics room.
I sometimes used to work until 8 and around 6pm every night there would be a shit left in the women’s toilet with no toilet paper. The stench was so bad it’d bring tears to your eyes. I was fascinated by it and decided to find out who it was. I asked could I look at cctv but, obviously they said no
So I decided to ‘cover’ reception a few times to write down everyone that went in and out. I finally figured out who the phantom shitter was and was utterly surprised as she was a lovely woman. Dirty bitch for not wiping though.
In my job after that a very high up lawyer got caught pulling himself off by a porter in the reprographics room.
I sometimes used to work until 8 and around 6pm every night there would be a shit left in the women’s toilet with no toilet paper. The stench was so bad it’d bring tears to your eyes. I was fascinated by it and decided to find out who it was. I asked could I look at cctv but, obviously they said no
So I decided to ‘cover’ reception a few times to write down everyone that went in and out. I finally figured out who the phantom shitter was and was utterly surprised as she was a lovely woman. Dirty bitch for not wiping though.We had a guy who would wear a cape on dress down days. The same guy created a calendar of some of the women in the office photoshopped onto sexy elves bodies. It was very disturbing but, tastefully done. He sent all the girls included one for Christmas. It was hard to explain to my family on Christmas morning.
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Irrch
Chatty Member
Sounds like the time I worked for weatherspoonsI used to work in a pub and literally everyone was shagging in the cellar. It was such an inbred place
No comment on whether I participated
loving this thread. Christmas parties ah they are missed this year.
best I can remember is finding out the man we worked with was one of those giant babies, someone else saw it on one of those channel 5 programmes and that’s how it we exposed.
Still can’t look at him slurping his cuppa. Cannot.unsee.the.nappy.and.dummy.
Maybe I'm just a prude but I honestly don't know how people can share a workplace with their partner or spouse and have the audacity to be having an affair with a mutual colleague! Absolute cheek of it!
ETA - I'm not saying it makes it any more acceptable if it's with someone the other person doesn't know, but to do it with a mutual colleague to me is another level of prick
ETA - I'm not saying it makes it any more acceptable if it's with someone the other person doesn't know, but to do it with a mutual colleague to me is another level of prick
Jellybean79
VIP Member
We had a member of staff who was a porn star. Once she was found out (her husband was too, and he was a z list celeb so it was in the papers) she quit. She was a stuck up cow.
My boss was having a long term affair with one of the managers at work. when I say everyone knew, literally everyone at work knew. Their partners didn’t seem to know but they were so sloppy it was amazing they didn’t get caught out.
I caught them together on a good handful of occasions, at work and in public. I caught them in the pub, caught them parked in his car outside work, caught them at Christmas parties, oh my god the list goes on he wasn’t in the office every single day but when he was, oh boy we knew about it cause her skirts were suddenly shorter and she always wore sexy blouses. When he wasn’t due in the office, she looked like a tramp it was hilarious.
it went on for a good 8 years, it cooled down a lot earlier this year because I think someone caught them out and threatened to tell their partners. Got no idea if it’s still going on now as their job role means they work from home.
I caught them together on a good handful of occasions, at work and in public. I caught them in the pub, caught them parked in his car outside work, caught them at Christmas parties, oh my god the list goes on
he wasn’t in the office every single day but when he was, oh boy we knew about it cause her skirts were suddenly shorter and she always wore sexy blouses. When he wasn’t due in the office, she looked like a tramp it was hilarious. it went on for a good 8 years, it cooled down a lot earlier this year because I think someone caught them out and threatened to tell their partners. Got no idea if it’s still going on now as their job role means they work from home.
Giggling Squid
VIP Member
Mini pavlovas could work- mini meringue nests with a little whipped cream and some fruit
Banana bread is also a great shout
Banana bread is also a great shout
prinnygrace
VIP Member
There’s a woman in her 60s who has a very big fondness of a lad who is 23. They’ve always been friends and I thought nothing of it. I’m close to him so said to him you and.. let’s call her Sue... have been very close recently and then he showed me messages that she had sent him on Facebook that are sooo weird!!! She tried to get him to go for a meal with just her that she would pay for saying that she would “wine and dine him at Buckingham palace if she could” and when they went on holiday (separately lol) she said “we have to compare tan lines... now that would be flirting!!”. She always calls him a “gem” and says that he’s the best part of the job. He finds it so weird but was friends with her so finds it awkward. I occasionally look at the screenshots just to have a chuckle but now whenever I see them talking in work it’s so weird!!! She also always cooks for him and will bring him in breakfast rolls or portions of food for his lunch.. or will nip to M&S and just buy him something. So weird.
Giggling Squid
VIP Member
Apple In My Pie
VIP Member
I’m in my first job after finishing uni... office culture came as a huge huge shocknot taking from experience at all)
someone’s face off DON’T
snog someone’s face offi’m learning, guys, I’m learning
1001 others
VIP Member
I used to work with a lady who would phone in sick nearly every Friday and every Monday which really annoyed the team as we were on a roster to mind Reception when she was on her breaks and off work (they were reluctant to get temps in because they cost too much). It was obvious she was hung over or just couldn't be bothered coming into work on those days, which made everyone's feelings towards her worse (she was a nice lady but was just there to collect her pay and really didn't want to be there). She had been with this organisation for 20+ years and had friends in very high places so getting rid of her wasn't an option.
One woman in my team was especially strange, and took a huge dislike to this woman, so tried to get her into trouble over things. Thank goodness it was in the days before social media (and the internet for that matter). I remember one day she caught a bus to this woman's house in her lunch hour, peered through the windows and took photos of all that she saw (which was booze bottles and mess), before showing our boss. She also rummaged through her bin at the end of the day to see what she'd been up to and told our boss she smelt and didn't wash her hands after going to the bathroom. I would have thought our boss - who was also a nice lady - would have given this weird woman a stern warning of sorts, but she absolutely thrived on knowing all the details, which she'd always start meetings with me by divulging (being quite young, I didn't have the guts to say, "Stop it!"). It was such a horrible environment. I left for a better job in the end; I have no idea what ever happened to any of the people there.
One woman in my team was especially strange, and took a huge dislike to this woman, so tried to get her into trouble over things. Thank goodness it was in the days before social media (and the internet for that matter). I remember one day she caught a bus to this woman's house in her lunch hour, peered through the windows and took photos of all that she saw (which was booze bottles and mess), before showing our boss. She also rummaged through her bin at the end of the day to see what she'd been up to and told our boss she smelt and didn't wash her hands after going to the bathroom. I would have thought our boss - who was also a nice lady - would have given this weird woman a stern warning of sorts, but she absolutely thrived on knowing all the details, which she'd always start meetings with me by divulging (being quite young, I didn't have the guts to say, "Stop it!"). It was such a horrible environment. I left for a better job in the end; I have no idea what ever happened to any of the people there.
HubIreLovesMnD
Active member
Baahahahah stop you're killing me here !
RedMagnolia
VIP Member
When I worked in an office, my hours were 9 - 5 Monday to Friday, but one time I was offered overtime to go in on Saturday morning to do some auditing. For time and a half, I agreed, and set off for work. When I walked in, I noticed the burglar alarm was switched off but thought nothing of it - maybe the last one to leave on Friday had forgotten to set it.
But no...the office manager and the CEO (both married to other people who also worked there) were at it, up against the wall. Their backs were to me, so I quickly left and after 20 minutes or so, walked back in, banging the door loudly and generally announcing my presence. Fortunately their shagathon had finished and both were dressed and chatting over a cuppa.
I don't think either of them realised I had caught them in the act and I never let on. I felt very awkward after that, when the CEO and his wife and the office manager and her husband were all working together and all pretending to be friends.
But no...the office manager and the CEO (both married to other people who also worked there) were at it, up against the wall. Their backs were to me, so I quickly left and after 20 minutes or so, walked back in, banging the door loudly and generally announcing my presence. Fortunately their shagathon had finished and both were dressed and chatting over a cuppa.
I don't think either of them realised I had caught them in the act and I never let on. I felt very awkward after that, when the CEO and his wife and the office manager and her husband were all working together and all pretending to be friends.
prinnygrace
VIP Member
I’m in my first job after finishing uni... office culture came as a huge huge shockBeing a student I have not yet worked a day in my life and so have nothing of note to contribute, salacious or otherwise. This is eye opening.
*writes notes* ...everyone
Hm. Quite looking forward to starting work now.
prepare yourself for the first Christmas night out and don’t be the one to snog someone’s face off (I LOVE this thread! I wish I could post the biggest scandals that happened in my workplace but they would be very easy for anyone to identify me I think...
One manager, at her first xmas party, (in a company where probably half of the staff didn't drink alcohol at all), got so wasted she was sick all over the floor, attempted to get with an employee who wasn't single, and had to be put in a cab home as she was too drunk to give her address. On Monday she thanked someone (who hadn't been there) for helping her into a taxi
One manager, at her first xmas party, (in a company where probably half of the staff didn't drink alcohol at all), got so wasted she was sick all over the floor, attempted to get with an employee who wasn't single, and had to be put in a cab home as she was too drunk to give her address. On Monday she thanked someone (who hadn't been there) for helping her into a taxi
LadyLockdown
VIP Member
Maybe topical given the current energy crisis....
I worked for a very well known global corporation in the energy industry for over a decade.
During that period, I worked in the executive office where I was warned by a senior member of the HR management team to be very wary around a particular male member of the executive management team. I was told he (the executive manager) had twice been formerly accused of sexual harassment and in both instances the company had paid off the women who had raised the claims.
Apparently both women were thought to be unknown to each other, from entirely different countries, during totally different time periods. The nature of my job meant I met with this man on numerous occasions, often on my own, and whilst he was definitely an entitled arsehole he never made a move on me. That said, I definitely believe he has / had form for what I was told.
I was also involved in the processing of business expense claims for the same company. It wasn't unusual to see very questionable claims being submitted by the sales team, which had been approved by their manager, for expenses from known gentlemen clubs in London for thousands of pounds. Within the same batch of expenses there would quite often be separate receipts with the same date for "masseuse services" for more than your average massage cost, if you get my drift.
During that same period, a senior manager who was from South America but based in one of the London offices, flew over about 6 of his own polo horses from Argentina for a team building event. This was submitted as a business expense, approved and the cost covered by the business! I don't recall the exact figure but it was an insane amount of money.
The business also used to receive 7-10 days notification informing when the external auditors were incoming and advised of which files they wanted to review. Those files would then be pulled to ensure everything was in order and if not, and it couldn't be "fixed", the file would simply be "lost".
I could go on and on and on...
I worked for a very well known global corporation in the energy industry for over a decade.
During that period, I worked in the executive office where I was warned by a senior member of the HR management team to be very wary around a particular male member of the executive management team. I was told he (the executive manager) had twice been formerly accused of sexual harassment and in both instances the company had paid off the women who had raised the claims.
Apparently both women were thought to be unknown to each other, from entirely different countries, during totally different time periods. The nature of my job meant I met with this man on numerous occasions, often on my own, and whilst he was definitely an entitled arsehole he never made a move on me. That said, I definitely believe he has / had form for what I was told.
I was also involved in the processing of business expense claims for the same company. It wasn't unusual to see very questionable claims being submitted by the sales team, which had been approved by their manager, for expenses from known gentlemen clubs in London for thousands of pounds. Within the same batch of expenses there would quite often be separate receipts with the same date for "masseuse services" for more than your average massage cost, if you get my drift.
During that same period, a senior manager who was from South America but based in one of the London offices, flew over about 6 of his own polo horses from Argentina for a team building event. This was submitted as a business expense, approved and the cost covered by the business! I don't recall the exact figure but it was an insane amount of money.
The business also used to receive 7-10 days notification informing when the external auditors were incoming and advised of which files they wanted to review. Those files would then be pulled to ensure everything was in order and if not, and it couldn't be "fixed", the file would simply be "lost".
I could go on and on and on...
cococookie
Chatty Member
Can we resurrect this thread? some of these stories are pure comedy gold!
jarv
VIP Member
Worked at a law firm and so many of them were shagging about. Not long after I left there was a work Christmas do. One of the solicitors got a blowjob from a young office assistant (I think she may have only been 17), a few people caught them going into a bathroom together and coming out looking dishevelled, she told a few people what had happened but it wasnt that bad because it was just a blowjob 
. The man has a wife and three smal kids ffs, there's no excuse from him.
. The man has a wife and three smal kids ffs, there's no excuse from him.
Kthxbye
Chatty Member
At one place I worked, two managers (both married to other people who also worked there) were caught shagging in the toilets at the Christmas party. It made the local papers
Another married senior sales manager was having an affair with a more junior female assistant. It was an open secret in the company for years.
His wife had no idea, until the assistant got pregnant...
When we moved to another office building across town, and various cupboards and lockers were emptied, so much porn and cocaine was found (not all in the same place!)
Glad I don't work there anymore, because it was toxic, but I do miss the gossip!
Another married senior sales manager was having an affair with a more junior female assistant. It was an open secret in the company for years.
His wife had no idea, until the assistant got pregnant...
When we moved to another office building across town, and various cupboards and lockers were emptied, so much porn and cocaine was found (not all in the same place!)
Glad I don't work there anymore, because it was toxic, but I do miss the gossip!