If it was constant I'd either ring the police or social services because its not on or normal for a child to be knocking on their neighbours doors constantly and asking for food/barging their way in
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In the immediate short term I'd let her in and feed her. I'd then on Monday morning contact her school and flag my concerns to them. The same advice has been given numerous times
In the nicest possible way people HAVE told you what they would do, either talk to the parents or phone social services
I've seen plenty of strange threads on here with someone posting a situation and letting it grow arms and legs. That's why it comes across as fabricated. A lot of people have chipped in with good advice. All it really needed was a quick chat with her parents, if you weren't comfortable then I'm sure your husband could help out. Absolutely no need to be putting up 7ft fences
Honestly if you thought something was amiss then you'd report it to the relevant people and leave it there.
I see what you mean sorry if this thread has come across that way.I am thankful for everyone's advice, I really am. I know I keep repeating it over again but I am just scared to get someone into trouble when they've most likely done nothing wrong, that's all. I think I need to just grow a pair and speak to the parents. I can't believe I am worried about it but you're all absolutely right, it's a simple bloody thing that I should be doing for everyones sake.I've seen plenty of strange threads on here with someone posting a situation and letting it grow arms and legs. That's why it comes across as fabricated. A lot of people have chipped in with good advice. All it really needed was a quick chat with her parents, if you weren't comfortable then I'm sure your husband could help out. Absolutely no need to be putting up 7ft fences
Honestly if you thought something was amiss then you'd report it to the relevant people and leave it there.
I think you are trying to kid yourself now that because she has said she’s had dinner at home today, that there is nothing to be concerned about. There is still cause for concern. I know you will be worried about the what ifs if you do report this to the school or social services but what is it going to take for you to do this? Imagine if something bad happened to this girl and the guilt you would feel because you wish you had done something. I know it must be a tough situation for you but you really need to report this.
If they haven’t done anything wrong. Then they won’t get in trouble. Don’t worry about that
It could be something as simple as both parents working shifts and miscommunication with them both about what time their kids have eaten or where they are.
If you don’t do anything about it then the situation won’t change.
If you want the situation to change then you and your husband need to do something about it. Nothing drastic just speak politely to the parents and try and build some kind of rapport. If you are uncomfortable with this then speak to your children’s teachers. They will be trained in safeguarding and they will advise you on the next appropriate action.
Anything that screams abuse or neglect. Contact social services or the police ASAP.
You dont get in trouble if you've done nothing wrong. Reporting concerns doesnt mean a kids going to be dragged from their home. It could mean the child, and the parents, get some support if needed.
I would seriously be worried about children in your house/garden when your not friendly or on good speaking terms with her parents… the child could go home and tell her parents absolutely anything and you and your family could be left stuck in a very, very serious situation. Aside from that, please ring the school and make them aware of your concerns. You shouldn’t be worrying about “getting someone in trouble”. If they are treating their children they way they should be then they won’t have anything to worry about.
Have your husband talk to them if you can't. Honestly, you are an adult, God forbid this child is in real danger....
You are a grown up, if you have even the slightest concern about a child/children being neglected it’s your duty to report this to the appropriate authorities, instead of worrying about getting the parents in trouble. sorry to be blunt, but you need to grow a pair and report them, no responsible parent let’s their six year old wander around to someone’s house late in the evening without checking on them, that’s just ridiculous. So you need to think about that child and what is possibly happening to her and make sure she is safe and cared for, which unfortunately doesn’t sound like the case here! You cannot turn a blind eye to this, people have been telling you constantly to report and you haven’t, you NEED TO REPORT THIS!!!
I'm with a few others here. it's not ringing true. as soon as the thread took a different turn you say you offered her food.. (isn't the problem that she keeps asking for food?) and she says no she isn't hungry and has a lovely meal. Then all is well with the world. either this thread is compleat BS, or you made the last bit up so the thread would go away and you didn't have to do anything.
I'm going with the former due to the drip, drip,drip-feeding.
If it is true then in the future deal with things as they occur, you are an adult what are you teaching your son if you cannot even speak to another adult without fear. Your other thread about a different neighbour was the same.
I'm going with the former due to the drip, drip,drip-feeding.
If it is true then in the future deal with things as they occur, you are an adult what are you teaching your son if you cannot even speak to another adult without fear. Your other thread about a different neighbour was the same.
I have a 6 year old and live in a quiet street. My child is Never out of the house without my supervision. They would NEVER go into someones house without me speaking to the parents and arranging it ahead of time and arranging a drop off and pick up time. Even if they are playing in the street I am supervising.
It is neglect not to know where your child is. Report it!!!!!
It is neglect not to know where your child is. Report it!!!!!
If you cant go round to tell the parents they are climbing your fence what will you do if they break your fence?
OP failed to acknowledge the plethora of advice given on here and simply comes back to add more the story and vilify the child to come across as the "victim".
OP, you're an adult. You're not a victim, especially to a child's behavior. If you won't take control of the situation which would be the adult thing to do to protect yourself, your household and particularly your child; then no advice will solve the situation.
What's strange is that plenty of people (including me) have asked whether the parents ever come looking for the kid(s) and OP never responded.
There's something fishy because OP is avoiding most questions about interactions with the parents.
OP, you're an adult. You're not a victim, especially to a child's behavior. If you won't take control of the situation which would be the adult thing to do to protect yourself, your household and particularly your child; then no advice will solve the situation.
What's strange is that plenty of people (including me) have asked whether the parents ever come looking for the kid(s) and OP never responded.
There's something fishy because OP is avoiding most questions about interactions with the parents.
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Exactly. They said they were going on holiday last week but the kids still seemed to be coming round, so who knows what's true and what isn't.
If a 6 year old child was in your house at 8pm, you'd return them to their parents, no questions asked. If your kids have befriended neighbour's kids, you'd at least have a few interactions with their parents. Based on the information here, I actually don't think there's any need to be calling social services because to me, it sounds like kids being cheeky. But this is why they need to suss out the parents. They'd probably be mortified if they knew what was going on.
What will you do if the kid falls and hurts herself climbing the fence ? Will this be reason to finally go round to the parents and confront the issue?
Sorry to sound harsh, but I hadn't checked this thread in a while and I'm surprised the issue is ongoing. OP you are the authority figure here, the adult: this is a six-year-old child. If you don't want her in your house, tell her no. Firmly. Children need rules and boundaries. On the fence issue, speak to her parents. She could get hurt and this has to stop. According to your posts it seems like these people don't know what the hell is going on with their child. I don't know anyone who would let a child stay out until 8pm - hanging out all day in the house of someone who is pretty much a stranger to them.
If you don't feel comfortable speaking to child protection services, speak to the school.
You said the child called round after 6pm and you offered her food - she didn't ask. You are encouraging the problem by doing this.
Sorry to sound harsh, but I hadn't checked this thread in a while and I'm surprised the issue is ongoing. OP you are the authority figure here, the adult: this is a six-year-old child. If you don't want her in your house, tell her no. Firmly. Children need rules and boundaries. On the fence issue, speak to her parents. She could get hurt and this has to stop. According to your posts it seems like these people don't know what the hell is going on with their child. I don't know anyone who would let a child stay out until 8pm - hanging out all day in the house of someone who is pretty much a stranger to them.
If you don't feel comfortable speaking to child protection services, speak to the school.
You said the child called round after 6pm and you offered her food - she didn't ask. You are encouraging the problem by doing this.
I wonder if the child has told their parents they have arranged to go to the op's house for tea ? The parents know where child is, they might be as reluctant to meet as op is.
I can also understand why op doesn't want to contact social services. For a start, nobody wants to be seen as being a grass. And it could be innocent, ss could be letting vulnerable children slip through the gaps while investigating a streetwise child who isn't shy in asking for things.
I can also understand why op doesn't want to contact social services. For a start, nobody wants to be seen as being a grass. And it could be innocent, ss could be letting vulnerable children slip through the gaps while investigating a streetwise child who isn't shy in asking for things.
I must have lived in rough areas cos at my last 2 houses I would see rather small children playing out all day around our estate, their parents couldn't possibly know exactly where they were.
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