Neighbour’s annoying kid - help!

[newtoyou]

Good luck - I hate social dilemmas like that and can get obsessed by them. We moved recently but at our old house the neighbours children had a trampoline in the front garden and were on it constantly. In all weather and times and with many friends. The noise levels of shrieking and shouting were (to me) appalling. 11 at night sometimes and early morning with parents nowhere to be seen. I was obsessed and upset by it but my OH barely noticed and even said how nice it was to see children outside playing. I actually hated him a little bit after that!
In your case I am still baffled as to why the parents let a vulnerable child roam around doing this. You are obviously a nice person but so many aren't and things could get nasty in many ways with other people.

11 at night! That’s crazy, you had every right to be annoyed. There’s a lot of loud kids around here but they go inside at a decent time.

The above posters are right, you need to speak to the parents. Special educational needs or not he needs to learn boundaries sooner rather than later before something happens, and it's not your job to try and teach him these things - it's theirs.

You're entitled to your personal space and to expect your things not to be touched or rooted through. Quick question, if the parents hasn't said he has SEN, would you feel so apprehensive to bring it up? (I'm asking because you've not really said whether they seem the type to use that to excuse behaviour or if they were letting you know in case he displays odd habits)

If that's what's making you apprehensive just know it's better to treat him like you would any other kid. Talking from experience (sister with mild learning disability, work with autistic people myself) the only way to learn boundaries and manners is to have people willing to teach you them, and not act like disability needs are an excuse all for bad behaviour you wouldn't otherwise accept.

Once you speak to the parents I would stick to firm, one word answers/short replies for a while like telling him no or you're too busy. It might be he's acting this way with you because he feels he can get away with it more with you than the other neighbours.

Either way I hope this is sorted out for you soon.

Mmm that’s a difficult one because I kind of suspected that there were some development issues by his size and speech ability before they told me. So it’s kind of hard to answer but I think I would actually be less willing to say anything if he was “normal” because at least with this, the parents are aware that he’s incredibly nosy and has issues with taking instructions. I’m more reluctant cos I feel bad for the parents cos they have another teen child who can’t dress himself etc. Also the dad is quite mean to the younger one, I hear him calling him names and stuff. So that’s also what’s holding me back cos I don’t want the kid to get screamed at cos he’s obv scared of his dad.

I’m off to cut my grass and I can hear him so I’ll report back if there’s any developments

 

[Web30]

Is thier not a gate on the garden you can lock? I couldnt cope!
Hopefully as winter gets going itll be to cold for him to go out, but his parents need a talking to, tbh if my child had extra needs i wouldnt be letting them out on the street like he sounds to be allowed, they prob do it for some peace but its not fair on you.