I do feel very sad about the way he speaks to Di. He is very nasty and unkind but she still tries so hard with him, always calling him ‘love’ and ‘my boy’.
She may have made mistakes but she actually acknowledges it all the time because she is repeatedly reminded for the whole to see so god only knows what he says to her when the cameras aren’t rolling but I’d imagine it wouldn’t be nice.
I would have loved a kind, caring Mum around me and someone that had an interest in my life. We have to remember that she had him young and I really don’t believe she was half as bad as he makes ok.
take care Di (if you ever read this) as you’re not looking too great.
I'm with you on this one Tracie he is just punishing his mother it doesn't serve any real purpose apart from making him feel better and the fact that he does this while she is aging and having health struggles (and no longer a perceived threat he likes her vulnerable in my opinion) just shows what a nasty small minded jerk he is.
In constantly bringing up the past he is blocking progress and treatment and healing.
It just gives him power to lord it over others he is very controlling and she is taking the bait.
I agree diane is a smart intelligent lady with a lot of experience of life and its so hard to see her reduced to this.
She is begging for affection and guess what the more she gives it the less she gets it back.
Thats why you can never win with a narcissist they turn the tables on you every time they turn your love and concern into fuel for their own hatred and sense of vengeance (which they serve back to you).
They bring you down (on their level) thats all they do?
The sad sad thing in all of this is that often narcissists are often witty beguilling people often well read or charismatic or interesting even intelligent people (on an intellectual level at least but no real empathy).
From personal experience i will say that the one method they use that is very very effective is the little boy/girl lost routine.
They are experts at pulling on the old heart strings the story runs along these lines..
Poor ###### if only his/her wife hadn't cheated if only he/she hadn't been kicked out of school i can't believe ##### the bad luck ###### is sick can't pay his/her rent hasn't got food to eat doesn't know where they left their bank card!!
Has been stolen from, is in hospital, had a breakdown....drinks/takes drugs/gambles/ but aww they can't help it....
(mark emoji!)
they've just had their 10th nervous breakdown (their mental health according to them is always bad and much worse than anyone elses)....no one understands...(but you might be the one person who does? just feel responsible give them access to your heart your bank balance and your self confidence all of which they will deplete)...
Oh and they are in an unhappy marriage (these people are always in an unhappy marriage!)...you see nobody loved them or understood them obviously that person wasn't special enough because a narc expects special treatment from special people turns out the last one was a bit of a dud...but look here they come with the puppy dog eyes...awww (bit like in puss in boots where his eyes dilate) say aaww most of all they need to be saved/rescued....
I've been around it all my life i know it better than the back of my hand these saboteurs of happiness these energy psychic vampires (because make no mistake they always drain others of just about everything) and they always have a history of trauma and trauma always follows them around (hence why they are so plausible about asking for help?)
They appeal to everything that is good in others if anything you will notice how well they get treated by others (even spoiled and indulged) people get pulled into their webs and after giving everything they have long for just a tiny bit of returned affection or even acknowledgement which they sadly never get.
So why should a narcisssist give up their horrible manipulation of others when you give nothing and you get everything back in return?
When you treat others badly and get treated like a demi god?
Whats in it for them everything
Whats in it for you nothing but enabling?
So thats what diane does she tries everything but nothing works..so she does the one thing that he will accept.
She reinforces his view of himself as special or superior (his ego) its the only language he understands but as she does this unfortunately all she is doing is creating more distance all the while trying to be close but it does not work and it will never work but its all she has got (and its all on his terms) but forget equality thats impossible with a narc they are special and others are just there to serve them.
Mark gets what he needs from diane thats what he wants and what about her wants and needs i would say in all honesty that he has never even considered those and he probably never will because other people are just objects to him to be moved around like chess pieces depending and where he will move them next.
Checkmate more like stalemate and thats exactly how they like it.