Mrs Hinch #574 We might be Nusty Trolls and Arsenal holes but at least us fat hens don't have to sell our souls

[Pumpkins1506]

Mrs Hinch #574 We might be Nusty Trolls and Arsenal holes but at least us fat hens don't have to sell our souls

Last thread was a goldmine for hilarious titles, but someone had to win it. Well done to @Parry1988 for the top suggestion.

Thankfully we've filled the thread at a more respectable hour this time, so what has happened since?

Fredayahoo took to Instagram to defend her ickle Soph. In doing so, she let slip that the house "is very much lived in I'm fank you". She also seems to think it's akin to The Winter Palace (in St Petersburg you uncultured trolls) as it's been an adventure for the boys to explore the rooms.

There was more """styling"""" (so many quotation marks because what she's doing is so far removed from the actual definition of the word) of a bedside cabinet. The only person sleeping in that guest room is Stretch Armstrong with that distance from the bed.
Then again, she thought that being on the end of the bridesmaid row was by SSS side so I can forgive her a little for thinking that a bedside cabinet goes as far away from the bed as possible.

She fed the alpacas...basic animal care there, nowt to be proud of.

More """styling""" in the utility, aka putting tat up on hooks to collect dust.

Nana Rose (named at birth, did not add it in her teens like some ) popped round to marvel at how that house was now in the family and to have the alpacas forced on her after Soph threw a load of carrots down at her feet.

Then it was time to sit and recite colours with Ron in the chicken run. Don't forget...Sunday is Hen Day. Monday is clean up the mess the fox made day.
And with that it was off to bed with some child endangerment in the form of a cot set far too high for a toddler.

Saturday was Mop Day, filling the bucket from the hob tap and not the utility tap. Poor Soph has all these taps and sinks but can't work out what each one is for. #brag
On cue, despite not reading Tattle since the first giant redwoods were seedlings, there was a hen house reveal. Unfortunately it's a case of all the gear and no idea, as there was far too much stimulation for rescue hens and far too little in the way of fox proofing. Despite her claims of having fox proofed twice over, there were obvious flaws in the fencing and hedges that are the perfect hen viewing platform height for Mr Todd. Not to mention the excessive food which will only encourage Sammy Whiskers into the coop with his extended family.
(I know you love a bit of Beatrix Potter, Soph, so I've put it in a way you can understand)

Oh and according to one of the sheep, we're all arsenal holes

Sophie Rose (added it in her teens) can't help but brag and neck McFlurrys
Jimbob is desperate to be noticed by Arsenal (the football team not nusty hens. Though probably also us nusty hens tbh)
Fredayahoo is can't decide if she punctuates with a space either side of a comma or not.
Al, hope you're well and safe.

Report her to the ASA for not declaring ads: https://www.asa.org.uk/make-a-complaint.html

Read the wonderful thread 500:

Mrs Hinch #500 Sophie Hinchliffe: This is Me; Life in Lists (of Lies) - The Tattle Truths

Mrs Hinch #500 Sophie Hinchliffe: This is Me; Life in Lists (of Lies) - The Tattle Truths Mrs Hinch - or Sophie Hinchliffe - is without doubt the most talked about person here on Tattle Life. She has twice as many threads as the next highest person. Contrary to what she, or other...

tattle.life

Last word missed off the title

 

[Pollyanna263]

I absolutely love all of your ‘Soph hasn’t read tattle since…’ @Pumpkins1506

I keep meaning to say this!

 

[Pearla]

Sophie’s chickens are coming home to roost
If only !
How long before she decides they’re just not chicken people eh ?
What next a Pony, Sheep, cows horse flies, bluebottles, rats so cute.
Just wait until reality kicks in.

 

[Pumpkins1506]

Quick critique of this, aside from the fox problems...

1. The drinker (red and white, on the floor) is going to get tit in and full of hay and woodchip within minutes. Hang it for god's sake Soph

2. I've mentioned the dust bath. @Justapeep raises the good point that a dust bath isn't literally dust. They'll make their own in the soil if they're not on hardstanding. That looks like the diatomaceous earth she uses for the WWs which can cause respiratory problems as it's so fine. Should be used in the housing to prevent mites.

3. I've no idea what that weird wicker nest like thing is, will just get tit on.

4. If she's planning on keeping all that stuff behind the housing stored inside the pen then it needs to be lidded securely, and the bedding needs to be put into a waterproof container. Or she could just store it somewhere sensible.

5. I hope she's got a tarp or other similar covering handy for the 7/8 months of the year they'll be confined to the coop when bird flu is rife and they're required to be under shelter if they can't be indoors.

 

[Pollyanna263]

View attachment 1495414

Quick critique of this, aside from the fox problems...

1. The drinker (red and white, on the floor) is going to get tit in and full of hay and woodchip within minutes. Hang it for god's sake Soph

2. I've mentioned the dust bath. @Justapeep raises the good point that a dust bath isn't literally dust. They'll make their own in the soil if they're not on hardstanding. That looks like the diatomaceous earth she uses for the WWs which can cause respiratory problems as it's so fine. Should be used in the housing to prevent mites.

3. I've no idea what that weird wicker nest like thing is, will just get tit on.

4. If she's planning on keeping all that stuff behind the housing stored inside the pen then it needs to be lidded securely, and the bedding needs to be put into a waterproof container. Or she could just store it somewhere sensible.

5. I hope she's got a tarp or other similar covering handy for the 7/8 months of the year they'll be confined to the coop when bird flu is rife and they're required to be under shelter if they can't be indoors.

Point 4 - all that stuff if it’s bedding and/or 4 that’s going to attract the

 

[Yel]

Ha, I assumed that was holes missed off the title and wondered just what was happening in hinch HQ

 

[EJK85]

Am I going mad but I’m near on positive you can hear a hen at the end of the story where she sticks her finger in the grit.

 

[Pollyanna263]

Ha, I assumed that was holes missed off the title and wondered just what was happening in hinch HQ

Well with their new bedroom looking like a sex dungeon, and a pestle and mortar on the bedside (ish) table, who knows

 

[Tomi2015]

Post about her in the local news acting like she’s the second coming of Koan Of Arc, to which I replied in the negative. Going to be hilarious when her brainwashed sheep start bleating at me

 

[ChunkyMonkey90]

A few of those 'toys' she hung on the coop, we have them for our hamster
Why can't people just tell her no for a change. Those poor kids can't have free range of the garden because it's taken over by alpaca tit, hen tit and Hens tit. She is so far from reality and so far up her own arse.
And they way she goes all high pitched when she talks and the squeals that she does. She sounds like a child.

 

[HoratioHoohah]

Am I going mad but I’m near on positive you can hear a hen at the end of the story where she sticks her finger in the grit.

I’m not an expert (though I expect I’d likely know more than sofa), but yes, it does.

 

[GimmieSauceage]

She will be blocking the rats in with garden furniture and calling RSPCA like the poor hedgehog

 

[Wize Owl]

I absolutely loveeeee the thread title @Parry1988 You clevvvvva nusty hen

As for Sopha’s poor henzz, she may have watched many YouTube vlogs, but they won’t prepare her for what’s ahead, she’s got a shock coming to her! Best read this Sopha, reality! Welcome @LittleMissOnions

Mrs Hinch #573 Moving house, but what's the hurry? Time to stop for a secret McFlurry.

I can’t wait for the utter chaos! The woman has no idea what she’s in for on her tend farm!! Exactly can you imagine trying to find a rat in thast house, a lived in house with lots to explore🤭🤭🤭🤭

tattle.life

 

[Tomi2015]

A few of those 'toys' she hung on the coop, we have them for our hamster
Why can't people just tell her no for a change. Those poor kids can't have free range of the garden because it's taken over by alpaca tit, hen tit and Hens tit. She is so far from reality and so far up her own arse.
And they way she goes all high pitched when she talks and the squeals that she does. She sounds like a child.

I think no cock gets off on her acting like that. The woman is a wife and mother yet she still acts like a immature little brat. I bet she has mega tantrums if she can’t get her own way

 

[Justanorthernlass]

When the chickens have a better outdoor playarea then the kids fml

 

[Chicken89]

Post about her in the local news acting like she’s the second coming of Koan Of Arc, to which I replied in the negative. Going to be hilarious when her brainwashed sheep start bleating at me

Please tell me Koan was an autocorrect another word to add to the nusty hens list

 

[Oldcat]

I’m not an expert (though I expect I’d likely know more than sofa), but yes, it does.

Its her stupid squealing I think

 

[springheeledyeti]

Go off to spend time with my beautiful family and there’s a new fred

Interesting to hear input from the nusty fat hens on her useless set up, guess none of her dissssschplay books were on keeping chickens!! Poor chooks

 

[Oldcat]

What I've noticed is when she’s filming and unpacking or doing something that involves moving she is really breathless

 

[Tomi2015]

Please tell me Koan was an autocorrect another word to add to the nusty hens list

Hahaha didn’t even notice that