Mrs Hinch #259 Take my dog for a walk? That'll be 24k please.

[9Pine]

You’ll love this.......22nd October. Thursday.

 

[Eleanor Abernathy]

Hinch’s horse after being owned by her for 3 months.

 

[watermelon sugar]

Tumble outta bed and I stumble to the kitchen
Pour myself a cup of mugshot
And yawn and stretch and try to film Ron & Hen
Jump in the shower and the blood starts pumping
Out on the street people have spotted my audi
With con artists like me on the job from 9 to 5

Working 9 to 5, what a way to scam people out their money
Barely getting by, there's no social distancing
You just copy other peoples ideas and don't give them credit
That tattle is enough to drive you crazy if you let it
9 to 5, Ron & Hen then some shit cleaning
Want to move ahead but Freda won't let me
I swear sometimes that Tattle is out to get me

 

[Poppysmimi]

Going through google and found these gems

Jamie looks like he’s trying to flog watches to passers by

 

[shadyessex33]

So she’s sitting on the loo with her hippos yawn out on display. Maybe I just have an irresistible crotch, but every dog I’ve ever known tries to have a sniff of my nethers.
She telling me Henry ain’t gone for a little huff of her fresh morning hairy clam?

 

[Sneakymum101]

“I love using my platform to share things that I highly rate” yeah for 24k I bet you do

 

[AreYouHavinAGiraffe]

Highway Code states: “When in a vehicle make sure dogs or other animals are suitably restrained so they cannot distract you while you are driving or injure you, or themselves, if you stop quickly. A seat belt harness, pet carrier, dogcage or dog guard are ways of restraining animals in cars.”

Doesn’t look like she is following the rules.
Does this mean she put Henry unrestrained in the back seat next to Ronnie’s car seat? What the fuck?!

Why can’t the fat bastard go in the boot? That’s what range rovers were designed for....

 

[hinchlighting]

Thread suggestion (in the tune of a nursery rhyme....)

“Sing a song of Hinchy, a pocket full of lies. 4 and 20 thousand pounds; baked in a swipe”

 

[calmyourritas]

Who is voting for tinned chicken pie please

 

[CoolMom]

Hello Nusty Cruncky Trolls, I have replied as below. I shall keep you updated though I doubt lovely Joanne works Sundays x

 

[Bigbluebox]

Couldn’t find the pic she posted of herself on mad barkers anniversary but did come across this in her wedding highlights... what the fuck?!

 

[Allthevest20]

That poll was more of a "what would you think had the least risk of killing you off"

 

[watermelon sugar]

Omg I got another thread suggestion? I might start charging 24k a post at this rate. Also love that my poll idea happened i voted waffle maker concoctions the best out of a bad bunch,

 

[DipsyDoodle]

Afternoon all, bit McCann to the party as I've been busy, I have been reading on here though!

Just thought I'd mention that yesterday I developed a Covid symptom, so I followed Soph's example and went to soft play, to donate clothes at a closed donation point, went out for lunch, went to the zoo and had a mate round, all in between trips to Boozers & Mingers and Home Bargains of course!

Only kidding, I went online and booked a test, went and had it done and am now isolating at home with my family until I get the result. If you're reading Soph, THAT'S what you're supposed to do during a pandemic, not eat porridge and hope for the best.

(Side note: It's a good job I'm a lesbian because the way I gagged when the nice lady was swabbing my throat I would never manage to deep throat )

 

[IrishCatlady]

So she’s just announced she’s having the whole weekend off Insta, code for birthday weekend away with Vestlife and Ma Barker looking after the bruvs . More lies and rule breaking

 

[watermelon sugar]

Groundhog Day is on Dave. Never seen it before, can't believe it. It's crazy

Basically, Bill Murray wakes up, goes downstairs, gives his baby processed chicken to feed a dog that looks like a chicken select, then they run round, look out the back door, all while You & me by James TW plays. Then he shines his sink and pines his loo. Shows everyone what he's cooking for lunch and it always involves pastry. Then he shows everyone his dogs dick before bed. Then he relives it, over and over and over again. Everyday! So crazy

 

[The Dowager]

singing lessons for a Christmas single?

Ooooh I can see it now, dressed in a white OTT dress, lots of twinkly lights and snow-covered trees as she does her own version of the S Club 7 Christmas classic...

"Never had a dream come true,
'Til the day that I fleeced you,
Even though I pretend that I still clean
You'll always be mugs to me,
I never found the words to say
You're the one who bankrolls Inch and me,
And I know no matter where life takes me to
No part of me will ever care about you"

 

[Poppysmimi]

Sorry guuuuyzzzz, just need to rant about hubby and don’t like actually doing it to my friends.
Hubby goes to kickboxing three times a week in a bid to lose weight. Well done. I go absolutely nowhere but work. (He works days and I work nights) so, I’ve just done my third night shift out of 4 and come home to him announcing he’s doing an extra session this morning. Told him he’s taking the 3 kids with him because I’m going to bed. Apparently I’m being unreasonable. Cunt.
Hinch has absolutely no idea how hard it is juggling parenthood without help. She’d be fucked if Jayymeeee suddenly got a hobby!

 

[mgh727]

Hinchers, I think it’s safe to say she just truly couldn’t be fucked with keeping you all entertained this weekend, she’s literally taken ya money and don’t care so much for keeping her phone away this weekend

 

[Mrsstaff]

She'll use those orange skins as christmas tags. What a laugh, she does realise they'll be all curled and bad within days doesn't she!