Imagine being jealous of a two yr old!
I have 5 grandchildren and sometimes go without stuff I want so I can buy for them, I wouldn’t dream of making any purchase their parents made all about me.
Self obsessed mare.
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I have 5 grandchildren and sometimes go without stuff I want so I can buy for them, I wouldn’t dream of making any purchase their parents made all about me.
Self obsessed mare.
Mental health issues here for sure.
After much research I identified my mother in law as being a conversational narcissist. She is the most draining person I have ever met in my whole entire life. She does not stop talking. About HERSELF !!
She is also tactless as hell and thinks nothing of telling you how she’s paid off her mortgage through her wonderful management of finances and ‘oh did I tell you I flew first class to Singapore’
She loves praise but minutes of it. Don’t stop at one ‘well done’. She wants a stream of well dones and refuses to break eye contact with you until you have fully caressed her ego
Anyone else experienced anything similar?!
She is also tactless as hell and thinks nothing of telling you how she’s paid off her mortgage through her wonderful management of finances and ‘oh did I tell you I flew first class to Singapore’
She loves praise but minutes of it. Don’t stop at one ‘well done’. She wants a stream of well dones and refuses to break eye contact with you until you have fully caressed her ego
Anyone else experienced anything similar?!
I'm furious about mine at the moment. I often am 
. She insists on booking weekends away ages (a year) in advance without consulting on whether we want to go, the destination, the proposed activities. It's just, we're going here for X nights, on this date and we're booking it now.
She said last July that she was going to book a weekend away for me and my husband, her and her husband and her husband's son and his partner for the first May bank holiday this year. My husband told her we couldn't commit at that time because two of his friends are getting married this year, and they hadn't yet set the dates. She said she'd hold off until he heard more, then two weeks later it's all well, we've got to book now because all the places are getting booked up. Then she books for an extra night and says we can just finish work early to get there!! I'm a news editor and we work on a shift basis, I can't just say ok, cool, let's just hold off on the news now, need to leave for ahostage situation weekend away.
The place is miles from us, my husband refuses to drive so it gets left to me, or we have to take multiple trains (which we're doing this time). It's got activities that none of us are interested in.
She sends a massive long email about the supermarket shopping - the first time I've been included in any of the comms about the weekend - and gives us a 1 May deadline to add what we need to the list. She then sent a crappy message to my husband on Sunday, 28 April, asking why we've not done the shopping list yet, why he's not confirmed what time we're arriving etc. "You've known about it for months, you should both take half a day off work to spend the whole weekend with us."
She's SO draining, SO demanding and SO controlling. She dominates conversations. Everything has to be a big group activity. We'll have to have a Skype conversation with her family in Australia while we're there, nine people plus a two year old on the line.
I've been very clear about my boundaries - I don't want things booked months in advance, and anything that is booked needs to be discussed, I don't want to be dictated to about where we're going and when - but they're repeatedly trampled on. Had a big blow up with my husband about it yesterday, I'm just dreading the weekend.
. She insists on booking weekends away ages (a year) in advance without consulting on whether we want to go, the destination, the proposed activities. It's just, we're going here for X nights, on this date and we're booking it now.She said last July that she was going to book a weekend away for me and my husband, her and her husband and her husband's son and his partner for the first May bank holiday this year. My husband told her we couldn't commit at that time because two of his friends are getting married this year, and they hadn't yet set the dates. She said she'd hold off until he heard more, then two weeks later it's all well, we've got to book now because all the places are getting booked up. Then she books for an extra night and says we can just finish work early to get there!! I'm a news editor and we work on a shift basis, I can't just say ok, cool, let's just hold off on the news now, need to leave for a
The place is miles from us, my husband refuses to drive so it gets left to me, or we have to take multiple trains (which we're doing this time). It's got activities that none of us are interested in.
She sends a massive long email about the supermarket shopping - the first time I've been included in any of the comms about the weekend - and gives us a 1 May deadline to add what we need to the list. She then sent a crappy message to my husband on Sunday, 28 April, asking why we've not done the shopping list yet, why he's not confirmed what time we're arriving etc. "You've known about it for months, you should both take half a day off work to spend the whole weekend with us."
She's SO draining, SO demanding and SO controlling. She dominates conversations. Everything has to be a big group activity. We'll have to have a Skype conversation with her family in Australia while we're there, nine people plus a two year old on the line.
I've been very clear about my boundaries - I don't want things booked months in advance, and anything that is booked needs to be discussed, I don't want to be dictated to about where we're going and when - but they're repeatedly trampled on. Had a big blow up with my husband about it yesterday, I'm just dreading the weekend.
My late mother-in-law could predict the future, after the event of course.After much research I identified my mother in law as being a conversational narcissist. She is the most draining person I have ever met in my whole entire life. She does not stop talking. About HERSELF !!
She is also tactless as hell and thinks nothing of telling you how she’s paid off her mortgage through her wonderful management of finances and ‘oh did I tell you I flew first class to Singapore’
She loves praise but minutes of it. Don’t stop at one ‘well done’. She wants a stream of well dones and refuses to break eye contact with you until you have fully caressed her ego
Whatever events happened in the family she knew it would happen.
Whether it was happy, sad, death, illness, divorce, pregnancy, engagements, date of birth and gender of newborn (after the birth) she 'knew it'
I found it very irritating. It also strengthened my belief that she was indeed an old witch
What would happen if you declined? not this weekend (because it would be very awkward to drop out now), but a future one when it's booked as it's no convenient...I'm furious about mine at the moment. I often am
She said last July that she was going to book a weekend away for me and my husband, her and her husband and her husband's son and his partner for the first May bank holiday this year. My husband told her we couldn't commit at that time because two of his friends are getting married this year, and they hadn't yet set the dates. She said she'd hold off until he heard more, then two weeks later it's all well, we've got to book now because all the places are getting booked up. Then she books for an extra night and says we can just finish work early to get there!! I'm a news editor and we work on a shift basis, I can't just say ok, cool, let's just hold off on the news now, need to leave for ahostage situationweekend away.
The place is miles from us, my husband refuses to drive so it gets left to me, or we have to take multiple trains (which we're doing this time). It's got activities that none of us are interested in.
She sends a massive long email about the supermarket shopping - the first time I've been included in any of the comms about the weekend - and gives us a 1 May deadline to add what we need to the list. She then sent a crappy message to my husband on Sunday, 28 April, asking why we've not done the shopping list yet, why he's not confirmed what time we're arriving etc. "You've known about it for months, you should both take half a day off work to spend the whole weekend with us."
She's SO draining, SO demanding and SO controlling. She dominates conversations. Everything has to be a big group activity. We'll have to have a Skype conversation with her family in Australia while we're there, nine people plus a two year old on the line.
I've been very clear about my boundaries - I don't want things booked months in advance, and anything that is booked needs to be discussed, I don't want to be dictated to about where we're going and when - but they're repeatedly trampled on. Had a big blow up with my husband about it yesterday, I'm just dreading the weekend.
Yeah, don't go next time. It's your husband's burden, not yours.
ok being devil’s advocate here … obviously without knowing the history and the detail … but I am in my 40s now with teenage children and going back ten years had these sorts of issues with my MIL. With age and experience comes the ability look back and see things with a bit more perspective and from her side rather than just mine …. It sounds like you are both making it very obvious that spending the weekend with her is the very last thing you would want to do … the excuses/reasons you give will sound false to her … if you wanted to go away for a weekend with her you would make it happen. She will be feeling hurt and rejected and will be pushing more to try and make it happen which pushes you further away. And the cycle continues. Unfortunately to book a weekend away with a group of people you do need to book far in advance. And it’s annoying when people don’t give you a straight answer or say they can’t commit. My advice to you (which I’m sure you won’t want to hear) is that life is too short … let you barriers down and try and embrace the relationship, give her more than you are giving now and she will stop pushing. Yes MILs can be annoying, but so can daughters in laws (myself included). Try and see it from her side and be empathetic. It’s very easy to get tangled in a negative thought cycle and be stubborn and selfish but it just causes stress for all. Let it go, make an effort to let her in and you will all be the better for it. Yes some people are pushy and annoying. It’s life. Deal with it. But the reasons behind it are that she wants to spend time with you both. With her son. It must make your husband sad. Stop being awkward. Suck it up and Do it for him. Try and see the positives that you have family who want to spend time with you, it’s only a couple of weekends a year, do they treat you or do you pay for yourselves? Try and find the positives. We used to make excuses not to see my MIL and I look back now and am ashamed by how wrapped up in myself I was.I'm furious about mine at the moment. I often am
She said last July that she was going to book a weekend away for me and my husband, her and her husband and her husband's son and his partner for the first May bank holiday this year. My husband told her we couldn't commit at that time because two of his friends are getting married this year, and they hadn't yet set the dates. She said she'd hold off until he heard more, then two weeks later it's all well, we've got to book now because all the places are getting booked up. Then she books for an extra night and says we can just finish work early to get there!! I'm a news editor and we work on a shift basis, I can't just say ok, cool, let's just hold off on the news now, need to leave for ahostage situationweekend away.
The place is miles from us, my husband refuses to drive so it gets left to me, or we have to take multiple trains (which we're doing this time). It's got activities that none of us are interested in.
She sends a massive long email about the supermarket shopping - the first time I've been included in any of the comms about the weekend - and gives us a 1 May deadline to add what we need to the list. She then sent a crappy message to my husband on Sunday, 28 April, asking why we've not done the shopping list yet, why he's not confirmed what time we're arriving etc. "You've known about it for months, you should both take half a day off work to spend the whole weekend with us."
She's SO draining, SO demanding and SO controlling. She dominates conversations. Everything has to be a big group activity. We'll have to have a Skype conversation with her family in Australia while we're there, nine people plus a two year old on the line.
I've been very clear about my boundaries - I don't want things booked months in advance, and anything that is booked needs to be discussed, I don't want to be dictated to about where we're going and when - but they're repeatedly trampled on. Had a big blow up with my husband about it yesterday, I'm just dreading the weekend.
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