I was sexting my fella one night (he was at work-me at home)Once when my husband was away I sent a very detailed message to a friend of how much I was missing him.. you know best friend talk. Well I thought it was my best friend. I accidentally sent it to my parents in law! I was mortified! There were things in that message not for parents eyes
Oh Christ. That made me cross my legsMost embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me is Mr christmasGrinch has a Prince Albert piercing! (This is important to the story)
after some fun Mr Christmas grinch says “my bar is missing” I said what do you mean your bar is missing?!
Searched high and low and couldn’t find it anywhere. Gave up the search, started to feel a bit woozy and weird.
Rang 111 and explained to the absolutely mortified woman who didn’t know what a Prince Albert was that I thought I had a piercing inside me.
manage to get a doctors appointment so off I trot.
In the most uncomfortable position ever, the nurse says nice big cough for me!! I cough, I hear a clunk and a piercing ball is rolling toward the nurse like some sort of twisted circus prize! The poor woman then had to literally dig inside me for the rest of the piercing as it has lodged itself inside medon’t think I’ll ever live that down
many moons ago then the rabbit vibes where massive my mate bought me a huge purple one to say thanks for babysitting (I didn’t ask her to!)Oh God, loads.
The one that stays in my mind.... I bought a vibrator when I was 18, shaped like a lipstick. Mum found it when she was helping clear out my room so it could be re-painted. ‘Ah, is this the lipstick your dad got you for Christmas? It’s a lovely red, isn’t it?’ She tried swatching itand obviously it didn’t swatch... then found the button... held it out as it vibrated away... then asked LOUDLY IN FRONT OF THE PAINTER “Apple, why is it vibrating, tell me why, what is it?” literally over and over and over, I was mortified, the painter (old enough to be my father) was tittering away although tbf to him he also looked as though he could’ve melted through the floor, she then got the message. Still, “Apple has a d*ldo!” went around my whole family for a while. Sometimes I wonder if you can murder someone via vibrator because I came very close that day (pun not intended) at least nobody snoops around my room any more
That’s fantastic. The only problem is if you get aNot the most embarrassing but this morning I was typing something in a rush first thing and accidentally sent my director a message with a kiss face emoji
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