Missing Blogger Esther Dingley

[PeggyHenry]

DC was adamant that she wasn’t in the mountain initially. He was convinced there had been foul play. He then searched those mountains as if adamant she WAS on the mountain. That didn’t add up to me. He was directing ‘ look over there not here’ and then he went and searched the very place he said she Wouldn’t be. Being cynical, he wanted the focus to be away from the mountains snd then he went there himself. He has always attempted to direct the narrative, whether through dossier or media. Whether innocent or not his behaviours make us suspicious.

It seems so obvious Esther was delaying her return to him. She even discussed the breakup with a fellow hiker. Yet DC dismisses this and says it is salacious gossip. How very insulting and arrogant. Why should the fellow hiker lie. It is clear all was not good between them, yet DC appears to deny this. It all seems very controlling behaviour.

 

[Savannah_xx]

Has he ever addressed why she was there alone? Like why would you allow her to do that?

 

[SummerSky]

Has he ever addressed why she was there alone? Like why would you allow her to do that?

He's portrayed himself as a hero & victim to the media so no journalist has gotten tough with him.

But I have no doubt the French police grilled him on his toxic relationship with Esther.

 

[LaurieLaurie]

I used to follow the BBC presenter Rachael Bland, who sadly died of cancer. Her husband moved on very quickly with a woman who looks just like Rachael and has also got himself a nice radio/Instagram side gig (even though it was Rachael who spent 20 years building a broadcasting career) out of being a 'cancer husband' where he gets constantly fawned over by women for being such an amazing guy.

(Sorry to go off-topic!)

First person that popped into my head when this subject was mentioned. Him and Simon Thomas.

 

[Agent Krycek]

I don't think he murdered her, but I think he knows that the state of their relationship and the way things were between them were directly responsible for her being out there on her own in winter with inadequate footwear and perhaps not taking as much care as she would have normally done if she was in a better state of mind. That's why he is so over the top having to proclaim their perfect 'soul-mate' love. There would be no need to do that if it were true - he does protest too much I think! And now that he knows that Esther is unable to refute his claims, of course he can say whatever he likes now. I think the final phone call was not a happy one which is why its contents weren't made public in The Dossier when all of her other private messages were. But of course he can now say it was all about how much she loved him etc.

Another reason why I don't think he did it, is his statement in the dossier seems like parts of it were written as a message directly to her - he thought it was possible that she had left him and wanted her to come back. So he talks about how she always does the right thing, references the ups and downs of their relationship etc.

In short I don't think he murdered her, but I also think they weren't together anymore, and he did not deal with that well. But now he doesn't have to deal with it, as no-one can prove that what he says is not the reality of the situation.

 

[Savannah_xx]

I don't think he murdered her, but I think he knows that the state of their relationship and the way things were between them were directly responsible for her being out there on her own in winter with inadequate footwear and perhaps not taking as much care as she would have normally done if she was in a better state of mind.

Oh that answers my question then. I asked why she was even there by herself, why would he allow that?

Yes, I think he feels guilty that because their relationship was falling apart that's why she was there alone and potentially responsible for this. If they were in a better place relationship wise then he would have been there with her no doubt.

Interesting, most on here think he did but on WS most don't think so.

 

[SummerSky]

Oh that answers my question then. I asked why she was even there by herself, why would he allow that?

Yes, I think he feels guilty that because their relationship was falling apart that's why she was there alone and potentially responsible for this. If they were in a better place relationship wise then he would have been there with her no doubt.

Their relationship fell apart a decade prior. He wrote about it in his book for sale on Amazon.

He stated they were in a state of mutual loathing.

This is so typical of narcissist abusive relationships. It's called "I hate you don't leave me".

The reason she stayed a decade ago was his near death & health issues. Stereotypical narc playbook hoover.

Victims are emotionally blackmailed/guilted.

She wasn't a weakling. The manipulations "discombobulate" victims so they become puppets. Even lawyers and psychiatrists have been victims of these relationships. (Real life stories Podcast - Narc Apocalypse)

She was hiking alone because she had to get away or be broken.

She was also hiking alone because he didn't care about her.

Worse still, he drove her to push herself beyond her comfort zone while hiking. She posted about that.

Her food issues are due to his belittling.

She was actually always alone.

Btw Saatchi fits the profile too thus hands around Nigella's neck.

 

[Savannah_xx]

I read something yesterday that they were together 19 years. I never knew it was long (well by today's standards anyway). She was 18 when she met him.

I was wondering why she had stayed with this man so long, (which @SummerSky has just explained perfectly, what with the emotional blackmail and manipulations ) and with true typical narcissist they put on the charm/love bombing at first then only after a while does it wears off and their true self appears.

Their relationship fell apart a decade prior. He wrote about it in his book for sale on Amazon.

He stated they were in a state of mutual loathing.

This is so typical of narcissist abusive relationships. It's called "I hate you don't leave me".

The reason she stayed a decade ago was his near death & health issues. Stereotypical narc playbook hoover.

Victims are emotionally blackmailed/guilted.

She wasn't a weakling. The manipulations "discombobulate" victims so they become puppets. Even lawyers and psychiatrists have been victims of these relationships. (Real life stories Podcast - Narc Apocalypse)

She was hiking alone because she had to get away or be broken.

She was also hiking alone because he didn't care about her.

Worse still, he drove her to push herself beyond her comfort zone while hiking. She posted about that.

Her food issues are due to his belittling.

She was actually always alone.

Btw Saatchi fits the profile too thus hands around Nigella's neck.

Omg! I feel so sorry for her reading all this. Poor woman

 

[Queen Vic]

I don't think he murdered her, but I think he knows that the state of their relationship and the way things were between them were directly responsible for her being out there on her own in winter with inadequate footwear and perhaps not taking as much care as she would have normally done if she was in a better state of mind. That's why he is so over the top having to proclaim their perfect 'soul-mate' love. There would be no need to do that if it were true - he does protest too much I think! And now that he knows that Esther is unable to refute his claims, of course he can say whatever he likes now. I think the final phone call was not a happy one which is why its contents weren't made public in The Dossier when all of her other private messages were. But of course he can now say it was all about how much she loved him etc.

Another reason why I don't think he did it, is his statement in the dossier seems like parts of it were written as a message directly to her - he thought it was possible that she had left him and wanted her to come back. So he talks about how she always does the right thing, references the ups and downs of their relationship etc.

In short I don't think he murdered her, but I also think they weren't together anymore, and he did not deal with that well. But now he doesn't have to deal with it, as no-one can prove that what he says is not the reality of the situation.

Makes perfect sense and would explain a lot of his behaviour for sure but what about the missing items? How do we explain That?

I don't think he murdered her, but I think he knows that the state of their relationship and the way things were between them were directly responsible for her being out there on her own in winter with inadequate footwear and perhaps not taking as much care as she would have normally done if she was in a better state of mind. That's why he is so over the top having to proclaim their perfect 'soul-mate' love. There would be no need to do that if it were true - he does protest too much I think! And now that he knows that Esther is unable to refute his claims, of course he can say whatever he likes now. I think the final phone call was not a happy one which is why its contents weren't made public in The Dossier when all of her other private messages were. But of course he can now say it was all about how much she loved him etc.

Another reason why I don't think he did it, is his statement in the dossier seems like parts of it were written as a message directly to her - he thought it was possible that she had left him and wanted her to come back. So he talks about how she always does the right thing, references the ups and downs of their relationship etc.

In short I don't think he murdered her, but I also think they weren't together anymore, and he did not deal with that well. But now he doesn't have to deal with it, as no-one can prove that what he says is not the reality of the situation.

What I can't get past is him finding the body, I mean really.....

 

[Savannah_xx]

I'm confused. It seems like the dogs were with her hiking or are they old pictures? Also she seems more enthusiastic about being with the dogs than Dan...

 

[SummerSky]

I'm confused. It seems like the dogs were with her hiking or are they old pictures?

She was very upset about having to give away the dogs.

She posted about that.

It appears they'd given away 4/5 to friends and the last 2 to her mother in the UK.

All the dogs were gone by the time of this hike I think. Otherwise I'm positive she'd have taken at least one with.

She loved hiking with the dogs. If only she'd had at least one with her still...

 

[Savannah_xx]

"Stretched out like a rubber band... stressed out like a working man... All I need is a helping hand from someone who loves me...
A little love from someone who cares is medicine"

My much needed helping hand came today frm someone who doesn't know me. Alex Boye doesn't know me. I don't know him. But his love poured into his music, him following his heart and singing his songs, was my medicine..."

She was very upset about having to give away the dogs.

She posted about that.

It appears they'd given away 4/5 to friends and the last 2 to her mother in the UK.

All the dogs were gone by the time of this hike I think. Otherwise I'm positive she'd have taken at least one with.

She loved hiking with the dogs. If only she'd had at least one with her still...

If only indeed. I think I read on here she gave them away because of Dan right? probably was jealous because she gave them more attention than him. And a narcissist can't have that.

 

[2xblended]

This is so typical of narcissist abusive relationships. It's called "I hate you don't leave me".

Would you please you explain this to me? I've never heard of it before (but have someone in my life whom I think is doing this to me). I'm reading stuff on google but getting more confused than ever. The narcissist hates their victim but won't let them go because they like controlling them? Are they just going hot and cold depending on their moods?

 

[SummerSky]

Would you please you explain this to me? I've never heard of it before (but have someone in my life whom I think is doing this to me). I'm reading stuff on google but getting more confused than ever. The narcissist hates their victim but won't let them go because they like controlling them? Are they just going hot and cold depending on their moods?

If you recognise the pattern it's happening to you. They all do the same things.

The best sites to really understand this stuff are HG Tudor's channel on youtube and Narcissist Apocalypse podcasts on Apple. (Lots of people telling their stories).

HG Tudor is a narc and tells it as it is. You won't find a better guide.

It is not about moods. Their sulking etc is used to control you. They are great actors & will do things they know will trigger each person.

They feed off your emotional reactions. So stop feeding him.
Stop reacting. Stop caring. Detach. I'm summarising. It will be hard but with Tudor's teaching you'll succeed.

Learn about the Grey Rock technique. It's awesome.

Would you please you explain this to me? I've never heard of it before (but have someone in my life whom I think is doing this to me). I'm reading stuff on google but getting more confused than ever. The narcissist hates their victim but won't let them go because they like controlling them? Are they just going hot and cold depending on their moods?

He hooked you with a manipulative technique called Future Faking.

Once you understand that you have the key to freedom.

There's nothing more powerful than FF on the human psyche.

Whether it's a boss, relative, boyfriend, girlfriend etc there are few people who have not met a narc.

The marriage/soulmate thing was Dan's future fake with Esther.

"We are soulmates. One day we'll marry... (when you're good enough/thin enough/we have more $$ whatever)".

 

[2xblended]

If you recognise the pattern it's happening to you. They all do the same things.

The best sites to really understand this stuff are HG Tudor's channel on youtube and Narcissist Apocalypse podcasts on Apple. (Lots of people telling their stories).

HG Tudor is a narc and tells it as it is. You won't find a better guide.

It is not about moods. Their sulking etc is used to control you. They are great actors & will do things they know will trigger each person.

They feed off your emotional reactions. So stop feeding him.
Stop reacting. Stop caring. Detach. I'm summarising. It will be hard but with Tudor's teaching you'll succeed.

Learn about the Grey Rock technique. It's awesome.



He hooked you with a manipulative technique called Future Faking.

Once you understand that you have the key to freedom.

There's nothing more powerful than FF on the human psyche.

Whether it's a boss, relative, boyfriend, girlfriend etc there are few people who have not met a narc.

The marriage/soulmate thing was Dan's future fake with Esther.

"We are soulmates. One day we'll marry... (when you're good enough/thin enough/we have more $$ whatever)".

Thank you so much! I'm seeing a lot here that I am experiencing and am only just piecing it all together! My mind is blown. I'll check out the sources you posted. Thanks again

 

[Basicbasic]

What food issues did she have?

 

[The_Investigator]

Oh that answers my question then. I asked why she was even there by herself, why would he allow that?

Yes, I think he feels guilty that because their relationship was falling apart that's why she was there alone and potentially responsible for this. If they were in a better place relationship wise then he would have been there with her no doubt.

Interesting, most on here think he did but on WS most don't think so.

They do, they just aren’t allowed to say,.. hence all the talk about equipment etc,.. they aren’t allowed to say anything about family etc.

 

[SummerSky]

What food issues did she have?

Laura the hiker she travelled with briefly told the police Esther only had a lettuce leaf & some seeds to eat one day. For dinner I think.

Laura shared her dinner with Esther.

Esther had a habit of asking strangers for fruit during her hikes too which they reported very odd.

 

[Queen Vic]

Thank you so much! I'm seeing a lot here that I am experiencing and am only just piecing it all together! My mind is blown. I'll check out the sources you posted. Thanks again

I

I don't think he murdered her, but I think he knows that the state of their relationship and the way things were between them were directly responsible for her being out there on her own in winter with inadequate footwear and perhaps not taking as much care as she would have normally done if she was in a better state of mind. That's why he is so over the top having to proclaim their perfect 'soul-mate' love. There would be no need to do that if it were true - he does protest too much I think! And now that he knows that Esther is unable to refute his claims, of course he can say whatever he likes now. I think the final phone call was not a happy one which is why its contents weren't made public in The Dossier when all of her other private messages were. But of course he can now say it was all about how much she loved him etc.

Another reason why I don't think he did it, is his statement in the dossier seems like parts of it were written as a message directly to her - he thought it was possible that she had left him and wanted her to come back. So he talks about how she always does the right thing, references the ups and downs of their relationship etc.

In short I don't think he murdered her, but I also think they weren't together anymore, and he did not deal with that well. But now he doesn't have to deal with it, as no-one can prove that what he says is not the reality of the situation.

I've been thinking a lot about this explanation and whereas before I was certain he had harmed her physically now I'm not so sure. There are still some aspects I cannot get past such as him 'finding' the body. I cannot think of any other case whereby a body has been found by a loved one after the official searching has taken place. I suspect that if it had happened in the UK then our authorities would be taking a very different view to that of the french/spanish police.
The news today that he has led a tribute to the authorities calling them heroes made me want to throw up. If they didn't find the body and he considers them heroes then what does he consider himself to be, seen as how he " succeeded' where they had failed. How vainglorious can one person be
The bit you mention about him speaking directly to ED in the dossier I thought sounded more like a eulogy
The other aspects that intrigue me include why was he 'searching" for her alone- surely they had hiking mates familiar with the terrain and you'd think they'd have volunteered to help just like countless people do when a person goes missing. I suspect that it was crucial for him not to be accompanied and that he may well have declined offers of help.
I'd love to know what her family think of him often in these cases they either adore them or dislike them intensely

 

[Agent Krycek]

Makes perfect sense and would explain a lot of his behaviour for sure but what about the missing items? How do we explain That?

Well the 'missing items' are only missing as Colegate says they are - we don't know for sure what she was carrying I don't think..

Laura the hiker she travelled with briefly told the police Esther only had a lettuce leaf & some seeds to eat one day. For dinner I think.

Laura shared her dinner with Esther.

Esther had a habit of asking strangers for fruit during her hikes too which they reported very odd.

She also ate a mostly raw food plant based diet, but still worried about over eating