Definitely relate to all of these . I’m 38 with a partner of 20 years and a dog but no real friends outwith my extended family and friends of my family . I was always fairly popular until I hit my teens and ever since then I’ve never really had any proper friends .
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Ladies, I really relate to this thread, and I appreciate the person who started it. It seems that middle-aged women have it the hardest. Seniors usually have someone checking in on them, whether it's a neighbour, a caretaker, or a friend to reach out to. We come home to a cat or a partner if we’re lucky. I didn’t start feeling lonely until my late 20s. At that point, I lost my friends, as they either had children or moved away. I stopped going out and found it difficult to enjoy meeting new people. Small talk and saying hello to the till lady were the highlights of my daily interactions.
As I turned 30 and later 35, I got married but still childless. I’m in my 50s now. My husband became my best friend, but I still keep in touch with fewer than ten people, some family, some from work. It took me years to learn to enjoy my own company. For anyone who is struggling, I encourage you to try something different, go to a café by yourself.
Loneliness can leave you feeling numb, and even if you want to make friends and have a life, you end up isolating yourself. I battled anxiety and depression, but fortunately, that has improved. The real difficulty is when you become numb and feel generally miserable all day every day. It’s hard to dig yourself out of that hole but it’s doable.
Things are looking good for me now, but to all the women in their 20s and 30s please prioritize loving yourself and make an effort to treat yourself. It truly helps. Take yourself somewhere nice once a day. A run, coffee, cinema, walk in the park… anything goes really.
As I turned 30 and later 35, I got married but still childless. I’m in my 50s now. My husband became my best friend, but I still keep in touch with fewer than ten people, some family, some from work. It took me years to learn to enjoy my own company. For anyone who is struggling, I encourage you to try something different, go to a café by yourself.
Loneliness can leave you feeling numb, and even if you want to make friends and have a life, you end up isolating yourself. I battled anxiety and depression, but fortunately, that has improved. The real difficulty is when you become numb and feel generally miserable all day every day. It’s hard to dig yourself out of that hole but it’s doable.
Things are looking good for me now, but to all the women in their 20s and 30s please prioritize loving yourself and make an effort to treat yourself. It truly helps. Take yourself somewhere nice once a day. A run, coffee, cinema, walk in the park… anything goes really.
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I moved with my husband when we retired from work and while he has made friends with other men in the street I haven’t been able to make any connections despite inviting some of the women for a cup of tea or a drink. They never respond and then I feel like a fool.
I find it hard to make friends outside work. But I joined an evening class 5 years ago, and met a guy who lives near me and grew up near where I am from. We now meet up for a coffee or a drink in the pub every 2-3 months….and keep in touch on WhatsApp.
You are not a fool. It’s their loss if you are reaching out and being generous. Keep asking as someone will respond eventually and it may lead to a friendship x
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What is the app called out of interest? How did you get on with it so far?
I didn't feel lonely until my late 30s when my last surviving parent died and the pandemic. I was quite sociable in my late teens /20s , although most of my interactions were superficial, I never felt lonely. Interestingly , that was pre social media.
Being content in your own company is a life skill
I am content in my own company until night times then the kids and husband sleep and I'm on my own it's a different kind of alone at night I can be in the house all day in my own and be fine
It isn't just a feeling of lonliness, sometimes it's the lack of people being around to call on for practical support.
My youngest is ill and I have to take them on the school run with me. It's things like that.
My youngest is ill and I have to take them on the school run with me. It's things like that.
I was quite upset this morning when I read the announcement. I didn't realise how much of a support system I find on here.
I think that’s understandable. You can feel like you’ve made “friends” on here who have come together in pursuit of a common interest, even though we are all strangers who will never meet.
I love a solo coffee and a slice of cake.
Nothing to be ashamed of.
I don't have any friends that I would meet for a coffee at the weekend.
I feel like it's real extravagance to go out alone , that I probably can't always afford. It's more justifiable if it's a social occasion with someone.
There's a ladies social Facebook group just started and a lot of the women are saying similar, they don't have people to just meet for coffee. They are organising little meet ups on the group.
Same. I was proper panicking. We're all just human and seeing familiar faces, even if they're just profile pictures, does make you feel safe.
This thread for example makes me feel safe too. I get most of my daily laughs on here. Of course we shouldn’t overshare too much on here but I’ve really met some amazing people on here so I can’t agree that they’re not real “friends” like BingoFlamingo says though I see your point.It's being able to get your thoughts out , rather than keeping them bottled up. It can be very therapeutic.
I am in my late 50's, divorced, and my 2 grown up kids have left home.
Parents and brother both passed away.
I work from home mainly.
Started a new job last year, but not easy to make friends in the office, when it is huge,
and people work hybrid, and we all hot-desk when we go in.
In my new job, I can travel into the office, and not speak to a single person (apart from on Teams).
All just to prove that I go into the office.....
Parents and brother both passed away.
I work from home mainly.
Started a new job last year, but not easy to make friends in the office, when it is huge,
and people work hybrid, and we all hot-desk when we go in.
In my new job, I can travel into the office, and not speak to a single person (apart from on Teams).
All just to prove that I go into the office.....
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It must be really difficult, I don’t know how people can integrate when working from home. I’m retired now and I’m so happy that I am. I just felt that work controlled my life. I’m married, no kids, just me and hubby, but I love being at home. I don’t have many friends but I’m deaf and have really bad tinnitus and I get fed up with keep saying pardon, so I tend to avoid people