Jake Quickenden #107 DJ Dicksplat's in da house. He's an absolute twat with a Beard for a spouse 🌈

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A huge congratlations to me, yes me, for this brilliant thread title for I am currently enjoying some Jamaican rum.

As I have been away for three weeks twerking and acting like 'Shabba' and twerking in the sunshine, nothing much has changed with this wrinkly, old chicken nugget head and his MJ Beard.

Come on Fakeys, make some noise!

https://giphy.com/xUA7b30EbtkaMHvRgk
The Wiki is up-to-date now for a full recap.

We are all desperately waiting for his MasterChef appearance. We have a full menu waiting!

DJ Dicksplat's in da house bros! Spin ya syrups like ya 12" vinyls! Got any gear mate?

Let's get on the ones and twos and raise your hands like ya just don't care!

Oh, and he's playing a nonce in Rita, Sue and Bob Too in 2025.

Stay classy Ratboy.

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Previous thread:

 
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Just caught up with with end off last thread, I’m dead Anyone for some stiff meringue peaks
 
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Never, ever, have I witnessed anyone DUST their cooker top! He’s a total halfwit.
Ah remember the days he slated influencers, now he’s a sleazy (useless) insta salesman.
Embarrassing
 
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Fucking hell, I'm riddled with Jamaican rum and even the cameraman couldn't be fucked with him.

The Nose obviously stayed at home with the Goblin.

I'm having a gander on TikTok.

Shabba!

That fucking syrup!


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That fucking syrup wants to go away.

Far, far away from Bognor Regis.


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Fjck me. Sorry about the spelling errors. 90% prof Jamaicam rum here.
 
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I can't believe he wrote a song about an old flame when he has a wife, or could he not find anything else that rhymes with sad? I'd be fuming if I was soph.
Honestly, if you didn't know , you would think that butlins show was a camp act you would see in a gay bar. Fucking TLC, what a man
 
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Fuck me Fakeys yous were on fire the last few pages of the previous thread still cant stop laughing Keep it up Gotta love this thread its by far the funniest thread on Tattle! Grief Wellington has killed me dead

Im a bit late to the party (like Fakey and Flapz always are) but has anyone offered up a serving of some ‘Carrot Jake’ or perhaps some ‘Spotted Prick’ for the biggest ’Steamed Pudding Bender’ on Instagram

And WTF??? Is that one of those ‘silent disco’s’ Best place for him I suppose! Nobody should be subjected to his screeching! Seriously though who the fuck goes to a silent disco?

Keep up the good work Fakeys let’s make some silent disco noise
 
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Hes always sooo ashamed of butlins. Yet he keeps going back. Next time butlins stipulate in his contract he has to post about it to his socials
 
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I can’t believe he’s actually shared himself ‘performing’ at Butlins He’s not tagged them in, so probably wants people to think he’s somewhere else, but still, considering it doesn’t feature him being on TV for 30 secs, I’m surprised
 

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Christ above, Murder on the dance floor would of been more appropriate instead of trying to sing a kings song the wet wipe
 
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So he’s finally put up his masterchef postDesperate for likes as why else would he leave it so late to announce on his page.
 
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Think he’s put the masterchef post up so he gets more likes. Hes had to put two AD posts before it that he’s his the likes on and got about 10 comments

Can’t have been too busy last night singing cos the sad fuck has been commenting on every love island post again.
 
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