Jack Monroe #64 One hand refreshing Twitter, and the other one playing the piano

[Cuileann]

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...the fuck?

 

[Toffee finger]

Nice new avatar @IndigoStar!

i can't quite get over old Salvo being discussed here on TATTLE !!!

I saw Penny Picker Steve mentioned on another thread too

Wasn't she meant to do a Supper Club as part of her Kickstarter for the top tier contributors? Did it ever happen? (I think we all know the answer to that)

Of course it didn’t. I’m sure it’ll be mentioned now though!

 

[Fiddledeedee]

“I have landed on something good here and entirely by accident and whimsy.” Is this referring to the time she was splattered across a Cotswold Co. sideboard in her giant undercrackers?

I’ve heard so much about the Sideboard Incident - could a kind Frau point me to the thread where it was discussed?

 

[Aug1977]

Will you lot all get out of my song lyrics and Moon Phase niches?

When I look back upon my wives (well, they would have been)
It's always with no sense of shame
I've never been the one to blame
For everything I long to do
No matter when or where or who
Has one thing in common, too



It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a bin
It's a bin
Everything I've ever done
Everything I ever do
Every shop I've ever been
Everything I've ever blended, too
In the bin



At school they taught me how to be
Truthful in thought and word and deed
I didn't quite succeed
For everything I long to do
No matter when or where or who
Has one thing in common, too



It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a bin
It's a bin
Everything I've ever done
Everything I ever do
Every train I've ever been
Everywhere I'm going to
It's a bin



Patreon, forgive me, I tried not to do it
Turned over a new leaf, then tore right through it
Whatever you paid me, I didn't admit it
Tattle, you fought me, 'cause I didn't care
And I still don't understand



So I look back upon my life
Never with a sense of shame
I've never been the one to blame
For everything I long to do
No matter when or where or who
Has one thing in common, too



It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a bin
It's a bin
Everything I've ever done
Everything I ever do
Every Cotswold I've ever had
Everywhere I'm going to - it's a bin
It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a bin
It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a bin

This is epic

 

[help i need some help!]

Ooo do you visit THAT MAN. at the end of the pier?

Good grief no. I'd never make it past the auditions, this face wouldn't fit!

 

[help i need some help!]

My mum used to make mint sauce using the exact same ingredients and I don't ever remember it looking like a saag aloo.

Shes put something properly garrity in it.

My nan made it but never added oil.

 

[Lanie]

She said she filmed on one phone and called police on the other.

If it is true, I expect she filmed it surreptitiously rather than hovering over them documentary style.

"This is Jack Monroe, reporting live from the 00:50 to Southend. Bringing you news of a scrap, similar to the one I was involved in during my stint as an #oitnb body double for Ruby Rose."

Yeah I agree she most likely did it in a "quiet" fashion but still if someone is hopping mad like that and giving someone else a pasting l, would be worried they would see the filming happening and start on you. It would make the situation worse as not only would you be assulted but you would be of no use to the victim afterwards.

Did she never mentioned the victim afterwards, did she stick around, call them an ambulance???

 

[Captainmouse]

She watched THAT MAN do his programme on a camping stove thing is his kind of cellar-y bit of his house and decided she wanted a piece of that action.

She was trying to copy Jamie Oliver but she failed massively and ended up with a shit shed.

but why is it now in the dining room? sorry i am obviously being thick
and what happened 'under the stairs'?

 

[Captainmouse]

Good grief no. I'd never make it past the auditions, this face wouldn't fit!

Do you have to audition? I just assumed you applied for tickets to be in the 'audience' and got yummy food

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

@SoulRebel Just saw your post in the other thread. I didn't see any more tweets after the train ones, and everything up to 2.02am is still visible on my twitter. I have nothing after that.

 

[Captainmouse]

My kids were always terrified of the owl man! Don't know penny picker Steve? Had dealings with swastikas man and manky leg man. I miss the south American pan pipe dudes, though! #southendrocks

Ooo do you visit THAT MAN. at the end of the pier?

 

[Lanie]

Perhaps

Im with you here @PoorPatrol. About two and a half weeks ago I was in a car accident. A car came out of a side road into my path and they legged it, I was trapped under the airbag with two broken ribs. They were unlicensed, uninsured, stolen car, no tax blah blah.

The little bastards legged it, three of them while I was trapped. Anyway, when it happened the police came immediately and I couldn’t leave in the ambulance until I’d given a statement and the police had recorded the scene. If what Jack says happened had happened she would’ve had the police at the next station and the whole journey would have stopped while the police sorted everything out.

As usual...

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Perhaps she only had one of the meals and actually left for home at like 8 pm and was only getting in a 1am after sorting it all... Perhaps, maybe.... Who knows?

 

[Captainmouse]

Thank you @Pocahontas. Seems I have a different idea of dressing up for dinner! Wish I knew what caused the blocking...I've not even opened Twitter for a week. Oh well, much more fun seeing JMs antics on here anyway.

do you use the same handle?

 

[Veronicaaa]

Season 4 was heartbreaking the way it ended for the kids. All sucked into 'the game'in different ways.

Yes - and the less said about S5, the better!

 

[Lanie]

This right there highlights her laziness. She is such a couch potato that she has to have a maky bin down the side of the sofa and or bed. Also referring to her son as a small child in an earlier tweet when in fact at 10 years old a child is no longer small in size or mentality. She just says that to milk her 'single mum's status for all it's worth.

No wonder she cannot be arsed emptying them.

 

[Lanie]

She’s already THOUGHT OF THAT!

Regardless of whether or not people like her food or not isn't it a huge risk to have her in your kitchen because her food is still pretty out there and you normally accquire certain clientele to your eatery. Surely something completely different to something that they are expecting could potentially put them off

 

[PuritySpiral]

Interesting, wasn't she claiming recently that she turned down the movie rights in order to protect her family?

You got there before me. Am on a catch up and I had the exact same thought.

 

[CarrotsandSticks]

I also think she be better getting the bus. Her route seems like a dodgy one. I have gotten the late train a few times and I only ever witness people getting a bit too amorous whilst a little bit tipsy or drunk people talking absolute shite.

I am normally coming back from traveling I don't tend to use the train for nights out.

to be fair, the Southend line is a rough ride.

 

[Begborrowsteal]

Wait, what happened??

 

[help i need some help!]

My kids were always terrified of the owl man! Don't know penny picker Steve? Had dealings with swastikas man and manky leg man. I miss the south American pan pipe dudes, though! #southendrocks

Manky leg guy has kept that ulcer running for years. I have so far avoided him personally, swastika guy I think I may have crossed path with on a professional basis. Penny Picker Steve. He literally walked the Town centre, with a bucket picking up change and legend had it that he was loaded, from the word go... Look, he's a legend! https://www.facebook.com/The-Penny-Picker-Steve-Fan-Club-214620511921430