Jack Monroe #549 Two different one's in three's

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Back on topic, do we think Jack is sat at home in the bungamansion, utterly paralysed with indecision and inability to sort out her Patreon? if I were her, over a year of raking in income and providing no return, I'd just be a mess. The longer it drags on the worse it gets and genuinely not seeing a way out.

The thing is, she has loads of people who think the sun shines out of her a and would be thrilled to help the poor smol pixie, especially if she dresses it up with "ADHD executive dysfunction" or whatever.
I think she’s sat at home thinking “Wow I do absolutely nothing yet still rake in a load of cash per month. Life is good!”
 
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Firstly, butter isn’t soft it’s greasy, do you actually mean your leggings are greasy? Secondly, “buttery soft leggings” is how the horrible MLM LuLaRoe* described their fugly products. That’s all.

*(if you haven’t seen it I’d highly recommend the documentary LuLaRich on Amazon)
🤣🤣🤣

Another vote for LuLaRich. More grifting fuckabootery
 
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To be honest, every £ she’s given (whether the donator expected a return in any way) is too much because she’s based it all on a lie. The tier she had for ‘good feels’ etc… she’s saying you’re helping her to feed her starving child when he never was. To heat and light her home as she can’t (but she absolutely can). To fund her activism (what activism?) and help her run her website with free money saving recipes (has she posted a recipe this year? The only ones she’s posted are copied, rehashed, dangerous and for which she was paid).
There is only a single post on the website in the last 12 months: the unnecessary quiche. Thanks to canal research we know this is one of her sabotaged recipes that simply cannot produce what is claimed.
 
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There is only a single post on the website in the last 12 months: the unnecessary quiche. Thanks to canal research we know this is one of her sabotaged recipes that simply cannot produce what is claimed.
I forgot to mention it at the time, but back in the summer I went to one of the Royal residences (as a tourist, obv, I'm not THAT much of a posh wanker...) and ate the infamous proper Coronation Quiche in the visitor cafe. It was really not that nice at all. I dread to think what guest's Pov version would have been like, even if the recipe had worked as claimed.
 
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I think she’s sat at home thinking “Wow I do absolutely nothing yet still rake in a load of cash per month. Life is good!”
She may have a load of cash coming in but all she has displayed recently is paranoia, fear and anxiety.
I'm willing to bet that she doesn't sleep well despite some chemical relief from medication. She'll be trying her best to distract herself from the press sniffing around (see the recent tea about her strange behaviour at the rave) and she'll trust no-one for fear that they'll turn on her.
She'll have been told not to read all of the places that are critical of her and to be disciplined about it, but her addiction to social media would be too tempting not to look 👋.
Cash rich. Mental health ducked.
 
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I think she’s sat at home thinking “Wow I do absolutely nothing yet still rake in a load of cash per month. Life is good!”
No way. If her income has dropped to 'only' £3k a month she will be panicking. Especially with no prospect of making any more.
 
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Firstly, butter isn’t soft it’s greasy, do you actually mean your leggings are greasy? Secondly, “buttery soft leggings” is how the horrible MLM LuLaRoe* described their fugly products. That’s all.

*(if you haven’t seen it I’d highly recommend the documentary LuLaRich on Amazon)
I second that recommendation. I still have no idea how a documentary about leggings is so gripping. Absolutely batshit.
 
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That's my guess too given I'm a shopping addiction/ credit card debt truther. I'd add that I also firmly believe her ex paid most/ all of the rent on her massive house, probably for a period in advance to actually get the house, because guests credit score and lack of job wouldn't have made her a good applicant. I have no evidence for this but it would not surprise me in the least if she had got her ex to continue to pay for a period of time after she left, in a kind of "you owe me, keep me in the style to which I'm accustomed and I'll let you go quietly" kind of emotional blackmail. If I was a betting woman I'd like the odds on this arrangement being the actual " iron clad three year rental contract" bull.
this sounds realistic. And do the dates tie in with the rent increasing at the end of a 3yr paid-as-a-block-payment type of thing??
 
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When grifter turns on grifter. Has the possibility of a future £73 been assessed as less valuable than the damage by association? 🥺 Yesterday’s guest.

(ETA: I’ve muted breakfast telly so as not to hear guest’s mate Bragg go on with himself. Glanced up as the subs said ‘Thatcher’ but not ‘guest’. What a sad morning for the fetid smol. Good job she never sees a morning, really.)
dragging this from earlier in the thread as a splendid Thread Title Nomination:
Jack Monroe #550 Yesterday’s guest
 
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I've noticed my little solar stake lights in the garden aren't getting much of a charge in this weather & the shorter, darker days. They've only been coming on for about an hour after dusk this week. Admittedly they were only £2 for five, end of season clearance, but if you were buying them to save money on electricity you wouldn't want to spend any more, would you? Really made me think. In the dark.
I’ve had to curb my early hours big light usage. Bought a little LED stick, really throws off a lot of light, more than my phone torch. £2, usb charge lasts around 8 hours. I think poor ness has changed.
 
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Ok firstly I bought some leather leggings earlier and I’m slightly worried I’m having a mid life crisis or I’m becoming Jack. Might air fry an ice lolly later, IDK.

Secondly I don’t have any LuLaGrift leggings but I do have some ‘buttery soft’ gym leggings (like £10 on Amazon) and OMG game changer they are SO comfortable. I am very tall so I wear leggings under jumper dresses to avoid flashing my neighbours, I’ve thrown out all my primarks now, once you go buttery soft you cannot go back 🤣

I’d forgotten about the Royal Quiche, I’m partial to an M&S tomato and broccoli but like everything in M&S it is stupidly unhealthy. It’s a treat quiche only (unlike Jack’s which looked like a punishment quiche).
 
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Ok firstly I bought some leather leggings earlier and I’m slightly worried I’m having a mid life crisis or I’m becoming Jack. Might air fry an ice lolly later, IDK.

Secondly I don’t have any LuLaGrift leggings but I do have some ‘buttery soft’ gym leggings (like £10 on Amazon) and OMG game changer they are SO comfortable. I am very tall so I wear leggings under jumper dresses to avoid flashing my neighbours, I’ve thrown out all my primarks now, once you go buttery soft you cannot go back 🤣

I’d forgotten about the Royal Quiche, I’m partial to an M&S tomato and broccoli but like everything in M&S it is stupidly unhealthy. It’s a treat quiche only (unlike Jack’s which looked like a punishment quiche).
Punishment Quiche is the name of my new death metal band.
 
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I think she's more likely pissed off that 180 people are enjoying her patreon entirely free (even though there's nothing there)
She must be wondering though, how many of them are trolls/ninnies/evil journalists/monkey boys/Eastern European healthcare workers.
 
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Fire Brigades Union marched on Downing St today with demands about more investment and a halt to cuts.

See if you can spot Jack there. Or, indeed, Big Dave. No?


1698864652953.png
 
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I know we're halfway through but bravo again on this thread title, it's a dinger. Bless you, Only Reading 1 Thing At A Time or whatever your handle was.
I hope she's in The Jungle. She's easily famous enough: they're all nobodies. Ricky Gervais's Extras predicted that 'celebrity' would eventually include a member of the public who'd been seen on News At Ten. "I got famous for saying I was poor, outed my child as a vaper on Question Time, and nearly stressed Matt Tebbutt into an early grave - Live!" must surely be a CV to die for.
 
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