Jack Monroe #523 Everything she does is pointless busywork that solves nothing

[plentyofpepper]

Her last Greenbelt talk is still up, if anyone can stomach it https://www.greenbelt.org.uk/talks/i-was-hungry-and-thirsty-were-you-there/

If not, here's Greenbelt's description of it -

View attachment 2283836

this just reads like Jack herself wrote it

 

[ForgettyBetty]

Greenbelt ... guest, Billy Bragg, and review clips below (it's jollof Riley all over again)

 

[Dr.CM]

uh oh, now coxy's fingering lasagne, slowly morphing into guest

View attachment 2280100

She wrote about making food but didn't mention guest tho... hmm... is something afoot?

 

[House of Carbonara]

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The sad, sad thing is that I could quote that scene line (medal!) by line....
That's totally guest though, isn't it.

 

[friedeggswithmetalfeagmen]

Her last Greenbelt talk is still up, if anyone can stomach it https://www.greenbelt.org.uk/talks/i-was-hungry-and-thirsty-were-you-there/

If not, here's Greenbelt's description of it -

View attachment 2283836

That has to be the most nauseating spaff I have ever read in my entire life. And I was a teenage Goff who wrote "Poetry" FFS.

If Jack wants peace she should maybe start the by repentance for being a liar and a fraud. I'd imagine a tortured conscience could sting like heck.

 

[rage naan]

Wait. Are the Vladverts (if I've got that part of the jargon correct!) weighing in on the mither question?

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

I'm off to bung the dwindling contents of the fridge into a curry for later.
So that'll be a chicken, langoustine and black pudding curry.
Maybe I am guest?

No - there are no peaches in it.

 

[Copacapybara]

SOUL SINGER

AKA “Spirit yodeller?”

 

[Sensible Susan]

Fraus mentioning JCC upthread are on the money. That 'poem' is a really shit approximation of Evidently Chickentown, which Jack probably knows from the closing credits of an episode of the Sopranos a million years ago.

Yep, and John fully admits he may have sub-consciously had Hamish Blair's poem in mind when he wrote it. I wonder if Jack would ever admit to such a thing?

 

[Dr.CM]

Was this when she was in her "Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells" era? Writing cringey middle-aged letters to the local rag about FOULING DOGS and needing more bobbies on the beat instead of iPads in hospitals. Fucking melt.

Unsure, it was a part of her erm... 'poetry' about disaffected youth taking ecstacy and being raided by police horses or some incomprehensible nonsense.

Her writing is the linguistic equivalent of slopping tinned peaches into a sachet of savoury rice.

 

[House of Carbonara]

Akshually, picturing Geetbo saying - if hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet I'll end you.
Nathan Fillion (), Firefly - for the not needs among us.

And of course that was NERDS. Blasted auto

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

It actually made me feel stupidly anxious seeing how often she referenced it! Partly ‘oh hell, everyone’ll think we’re all like that with this constant publicity’ and wondering if I’d be the same in that position.

But although I’m basically the incarnation of chaos I don’t think ND people are typically deliberately deceitful, and at this stage it seems very disingenuous of her to claim it was all an innocent mistake.

It’s also odd for a hyperfocus to be done so badly! I’m not sure if her recipies started well and then just fell off a cliff, but given what she does after years of practise I’m not keep on sampling the earlier work!

It puzzles me a lot, as you say we’re super aware of our weak points and incessantly apologising for them! It just feels like some other issue is in play for her to never express any remorse…

Could it be that she doesn't care?

Yes. It’s also one of a pair that

Spoiler: WARNED

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Do they shovel ?

 

[Dr.CM]

Is Scamanda the podcast a true story? I've googled it and thought it was a fictional drama but now you've got me curious.

 

[Cat Face]

I'm interested to hear your personal points of view about what guest would have to do to satisfy you that she is truly sorry so she could seek some sort of redemption.

I almost said all my wants here:

If she was HONEST about her income/lifestyle (no need to disclose anything, just stop the povplay) I geniunely wouldn't give a shit about what she was sinking her money into. (Maybe slightly irritated that she wasn't giving her Patrons owt for their hard-earned, but that's on them too, if they're still subbed after receiving nowt for months.) It's just the performative stuff, the povplay, that gets on my (large and often in the way) tits when her income is CLEARLY nowhere near as low as even a working class income, let alone a pov one.

I know that there would be multiple things that would still annoy me about her, but that's much the same as many people in the public eye.

If she:
* refunded the Sue Lee money to the donators
* stopped pretending she's a pov

... I think I'd be OK with that. As a "sorry".

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Well, isn't that last the question they need asking?

I think I might renew my NUJ membership....
---

Langoustine isn't a fruit?

Langoustine isn't a fruit?

That depends on just how vegan you are.
---

Like wither

WASH OUT YOUR MOUTH!

 

[Domacles]

I’m going to be honest and say Greenbelt sounds as boring as fuck. I can’t imagine anyone other than white, middle class, middle England frumps going to that.

Sounds a bit like Hay tbh

 

[Copacapybara]

I know this is guest, so normal rules don’t apply but wouldn’t most people be too mortified to show up at an event where they had to release a statement beforehand defending the fact you’re going?!

I kind of like this approach to social events tbh, if everyone’s thoroughly warned I can plow through the snack bar and hurl eggs for trivial disagreements as much as I like because everyone signed up for that willingly in advance.

 

[L3moning]

Oh wow I had forgotten that dream interpretation books were a thing. Do people not want to interpret their dreams anymore or do we just Google it now?

There are many many websites dedicated to it.

 

[Hold my beans]

Look! If I hold my hand like a claw, it looks like a claw.

Maybe she'd been on the mushies

 

[Sensible Susan]

Her poetry reminds me of a girl at a Summer playscheme who read her own poetry out loud to a small group of fawning hangers on every lunchtime. Being one of the adult supervisors I had to cram the corned beef and tomato sandwich down my gob to stifle the sniggers.
Teenage angst is fine. Bad poetry is often hilarious.

She ain't no John Cooper Clarke.

Soz didn't see this, mentioned JCC further down! Great minds eh