Jack Monroe #474 She's gone on strike like the other essential services

[Emmapism]

I have done a thread! Title by the frequently hilarious @Elsie Ben Felyn

Geetz was technically most voted for but I wasn't sure if we could have 'coke hag and nose boner' in the thread title

Mods feel free to change if I've done the wrong thing! Please posts your recaps you terrible bullying arseholes

WARNED Friendly mod edit: Please keep the thread to Jack and not stans on Twitter etc, and there is a Food and Drink thread for off-topic discussions.

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

Jack deleted her account in a huff and since then the Fraus have been revisiting Favourite Jack Monroe Lies, there's some bangers.

 

[MoistenedGussets]

Jack Monroe Lies, there's some bangers.

Bangers made of bollocks..
Good old bollock bangers, full of dog bits and sawdust.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Jack deleted her account in a huff and since then the Fraus have been revisiting Favourite Jack Monroe Lies, there's some bangers.

More bangers than a Georgian Church Suppers cookbook.

 

[ScarlettOHaha]

I must say Liz Truss blaming a left wing establishment for her downfall is giving me serious Jackie vibes this morning, I was disappointed she didn’t say DO YOU WANT TO STOP ME BREATHING?

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Jack being given a designer dog for free was also a good fib haha. Good old cocknose.

 

[Lucy Aeroplane]

Geetz was technically most voted for but I wasn't sure if we could have 'coke hag and nose boner' in the thread title

FINE. (edit: this is a grand thread title though, I’ll only sulk for a minute x)

I would like to preserve for posterity that the reason “I’m not a coke hag, my nose has a boner” was ever written down in the first place was because a claim was made that noses contain erectile tissue and swell up with excitement.

They do not.

 

[Dobbythehouseelf]

Biggest lie for me... ugh there are just so many. I think the depression and dyeing clothes clinches it for me.

I don't want to trigger anyone, so I won't put any details but I was very suicidal for a while. Medication, the samaritans and my therapist saved my life. I try to tell myself the same thing when times are bleak, that I wont kill myself, today.

No amount of doggos, cattos or black clothes help me feel better. She has probably felt down, fed up etc. But not truly depressed.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

FINE. (edit: this is a grand thread title though, I’ll only sulk for a minute x)

I would like to preserve for posterity that the reason “I’m not a coke hag, my nose has a boner” was ever written down in the first place was because a claim was made that noses contain erectile tissue and swell up with excitement.

They do not.

can you imagine if that was real and people actually got nose boners

 

[stunrw]

Blow your nose and boom..........walking round with a nose semi for the next 20 minutes

 

[Fruitjack]

On the last thread I said that my favourite lie was her saying that she’d never had cats before despite blogging extensively about 2 others. I found the screenshots. Apologies to Milliband for calling him Tony, I don’t suppose it was the first time.

Jack Monroe #36 Drawers of toys, drawers of pills, she needs 5 sideboards for all the lies

If we’re posting pictures of our cats, any excuse to show my 3 😍 Now that is a close up eye I can get on board with

tattle.life

 

[munkibrain]

can you imagine if that was real and people actually got nose boners

Love a good nose wank

 

[SamFoxStuckinaCloak]

Heavily tattooed woman on Sunday Brunch- Jack could never!!!!

 

[Country Bumpkin]

Love a good nose wank

Is that what happens when you blow your nose? I guess a sneeze is a nose orgasm

 

[Foxvint]

Dressing up as Belle cos it was gonna delight the boy and definitely not cos she's a desperate tap dancing attention vacuum was a belter. Btw did she ever post pics of a sample of these letters she cherishes from ppl she's helped? Cos that's 100% something she'd do if they existed. But they don't exist except in her confused little bobble head.

 

[Elsie Ben Felyn]

can you imagine if that was real and people actually got nose boners

I’ve been going around for days thinking a nose boner was a thing but didn’t like to check by asking in case everyone thought I was stupid. True story. I’m stupid

 

[Foxvint]

Looking like its moving weekend. Some poor sod carrying 17 sideboards is being asked jam or cream 1st as we speak. Don't accept a brew fella, she'll start looking at veils and venues.

 

[Reagent]

Coming from the past to reiterate the lie about her disfigured leg. as a polio survivor I had a leg lengthening op when I was 10. Something went horribly wrong and I now have such deep scars the skin is attached to the bone. That is disfigured Jack you melt.
---

Coming from the past to reiterate the lie about her disfigured leg. as a polio survivor I had a leg lengthening op when I was 10. Something went horribly wrong and I now have such deep scars the skin is attached to the bone. That is disfigured Jack you melt.

Edited to add, I didn't say this for attention or sympathy but because she really grates my mushrooms!

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

On the last thread I said that my favourite lie was her saying that she’d never had cats before despite blogging extensively about 2 others. I found the screenshots. Apologies to Milliband for calling him Tony, I don’t suppose it was the first time.

Jack Monroe #36 Drawers of toys, drawers of pills, she needs 5 sideboards for all the lies

If we’re posting pictures of our cats, any excuse to show my 3 😍 Now that is a close up eye I can get on board with

tattle.life

That’s a perfect example of her tricksy language. Ha I said that this was the first time I had ONE cat! I didn’t say it was the first time I had ANY cat! Shut up troll

FFS can you imagine what she’d be like to live with? Arguing over every petty point. Making up stupid pointless lies about everything. She’d just drain all the words out of you

 

[Geetbo]

My title was also technically too early so I will just sit here and STOP BREATHING.

I reckon she might be in for a long break this time lads. Every time she comes back it’s absolute chaos for her now.