Jack Monroe #401 Is there a ‘blocked by DIVA magazine’ club?

Sunday:

Excellent, now we know where to direct the FOI
(edit: Jack's liked this, so must be correct, no?)

Sorry, was Keffals not the one triangulated by a reflection in her eye?

Thursday Morning huddle, National Cyber Crime Agency. Names redacted to protect identity
1 “morning all, we need to check in and get up to date on all current threats. As you know Iran have suspended Social Media but pictures are getting out of women burning hijabs; servers who hosted these were taken down by bots we traced back all over the world. We need to know who is helping the Iranian regime. We don’t need any more issues in that region”
3 “new PM’s advisors obviously being targeted by Russian bot farms - ongoing surveillance in case of any hostility”
2 “yes and also that Jack one who went viral the other week for rinsing spaghetti hoops, someone tried to log into her PayPal, concerned arseholes have tweeted us to look into it”

People-huv-tae-know said:

'Youre fucked Sunshine' she says. Does she think she is a polis? It sounds very like a 1960s/70s polis phrase; 'You're nicked sunshine'.

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She’s been listening to ‘One Night in Bangkok‘ again, thought “I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine“ sounded badass and American. She’s too young, too think, or too both to remember that it was written by the guys from ABBA.

DinosaurSenior said:

Womp womp! That's the sound of da police

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Enjoying my morning Grunka, laughing at funny stuff.
All of a sudden there's tea in my nose and on my tablecloth and now I'll have this song in my head all day.

PS Thread title pls if not already nommed

I believe this was the most voted thread title. Is anyone doing the new thread?

Mendacious Trumpet said:

Excellent, now we know where to direct the FOI
(edit: Jack's liked this, so must be correct, no?)
View attachment 1596276

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Christ. So, Jack is conflating the importance of her alleged PayPal attempted theft with cyber crimes against the UK by North Korea or Russia? Nice.

PorkandBeans said:

She’s been listening to ‘One Night in Bangkok‘ again, thought “I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine“ sounded badass and American. She’s too young, too think, or too both to remember that it was written by the guys from ABBA.

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And she wouldn't be caught watching Clint Eastwood. But she sounds so darn tough, tho'.

Just thought I'd save the morning shift some work.

NEW THREAD ALERT, SUNSHINES

Nonah said:

I could have sworn she said the swollen eye was from an insect bite. Maybe there’s been more than one. I don’t buy the bathroom tap explaination. The likelihood of falling onto a sink and only hitting a localised area like that is pretty teensy. Especially if falling at speed. Lolling over the toilet absolutely hammered and falling face first onto it is a more plausible explanation.

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That was eye patch era

linzilou said:

i just dip in and out of this thread to be honest since it moves so fast, but context is everything with this type of this. were they speculating because she was complaining it was a long walk? did she mention he had to get multiple buses and it was a faff? did she start a conversation and bait people in to commenting about it.....?

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When she made him breakfast (might have been that pancake sludge), and tweeted about it, some of us were wondering about the timing of him actually getting to school on time (although he probably wasn’t really there). Jack is probably referring to this.
But it’s not abuse or harassment, you absolute melon. Not by any definition.