Jack Monroe #276 Breakfast at Griftany’s

[LavaFlake]

When I RENTED in a smol flat we had no choice but to have induction hobs as any modern flat above the ground floor can't use gas. Guess that's not a problem in the crappy bungalow.

Seeing as you're a walking advert for the John Lewis and Cotswold Co. catalogue, I'd zip it if I were you, hun!

Quoting myself like an idiot but it turns out there's a difference between an electric hob and induction hob.

I FAILED my 11+ and had to go to comprehensive school so please don't blame me for making mistakes <\quavery voice>

 

[Froggies]

It's because she mistakenly thinks they're FANCY and has to always be breadcrumbing how very, very poor she is.

Breadcrumbing how poor she is whilst wearing £1100 worth of earrings, that sums Jack up really doesn’t it?

 

[TillyMiffin]

Does Steve buscemi look like Ian Rush? I think a little. Just saying.


So if he bought the jewellery, he’s someone who has a lot of money, really loves Monopoly, but can’t cook and isn’t on Twitter. Oh and he has lots of DVDs and has the patience of a Saint.
View attachment 1158116

I think this could be the only possible candidate for the post of Jack’s ‘OH’:

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

2 pages behind but wanted to drop this here. Was curious as to how much her Patreon take home changes as we play around with the % of subscribers on different tiers, and summarised it by looking at the avg per sub. GC lurkers please don’t share a print screen of this, this frau has anxiety disorders ty.

The blue highlighted range is what I think the reality is closer to being - remember that 100% of subs could be on the lowest two tiers to get an avg subscriber value of £6.50, for £9.50 100% could be on the lowest 3 subs. £4.5k - £6.7k is not remotely an unrealistic figure for her to be netting a month.

Also put 5% fees in cos I do think she’ll be on the legacy tier but need to read and figure out.

PS I know you’re not wealthy cos you’re bleeping thick with it hun, but you’re undoubtedly high income.

 

[jenny2603]

Ugh yes, it’s so gaslighting, for what you said, AND to say that wearing the ££££ earrings.

She uses that claim that she’s a millionaire as a deflection. It’s kind of annoying that that rumour went around. Because it’s easy enough to believe her when she “defends herself against truthers” and says she’s not a millionaire, but means she doesn’t have to mention or defend herself about what she really earns from the Patreon.

I'd be genuinely stunned if she were even close to a millionaire, that said if she wasn't a complete a, had put the work in and not blown a fortune on tat then a pretty decent six figure net worth could have been hers. She's nowhere near poor though and lets remember does have parental wealth to fall back on.

 

[BlendedSlop]

View attachment 1158464

 

[Hollaaa]

I think this could be the only possible candidate for the post of Jack’s ‘OH’:

Did he not have a sense of smell or taste either?

 

[bowiethesdmn]

Net worth - 3 figures?

Hang on a cotton picking minute....

£1200 earrings
£1000 smeg fridge
£600 Iphone
£100 hat

Well, there is almost £3k before we even look at the Emin, designer clothes, cookware, and whatever other tat she has. Net worth isn't whats in your bank account flower!!! If it was, I am literally worth less than nothing! Why you sob, net worth nob!

I simply cannot believe someone as financially forensic as Jack could be unaware of what net worth constitutes, but she's also physically incapable of lying so now I'm really confused!

Enjoying the pre-emptive imaginary scorn she's pouring on herself. I'm delighted she has a series because it will be hilarious, so if this was the aneurysm-inducing news then she needs to up her game. If she suddenly revealed she was shacking up with Mom it might induce a slight twitch, but no. I'm happy for her us.

Spoiler: sex jack

I fell asleep last night with all your various versions of Sex Jack playing in my head and I blame the subsequent nightmares on that and not the analogue horror Youtubers I was watching before bed

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Do I

a) do my last bit of work before the end of the day
b) refresh the threads so I can pick up top pro life tips such as

why can’t I quit you chaos

 

[SarcasticEllis]

Not going there with the rage inducing money chat, but wtf is wrong with her?!
Imagine having one of those days at work that feels really professionally rewarding and exciting (as I’m sure filming a TV show would!) and the first thing that comes to mind is to go on social media and make really sour and snotty comments.
I just don’t understand. Where is the joy and happiness??

 

[jenny2603]

Here's Jack in a stunt kitchen from 2015. Fair play she seems to have got through the day without biting the owner of the kitchen or throwing her tit at the walls.

Jack Monroe Cooks In My Kitchen - Mad About The House

Much excitement in The Mad House last week when the Guardian columnist and food blogger Jack Monroe came to film some recipes for a collaboration with Groupon to raise money for Oxfam, for whom she is also an ambassador. She arrived at about 10am walking on a stick having broken about…

www.madaboutthehouse.com

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

Who is she calling illiterate? LOLOLOL

 

[Cucumberthunder]

2 pages behind but wanted to drop this here. Was curious as to how much her Patreon take home changes as we play around with the % of subscribers on different tiers, and summarised it by looking at the avg per sub. GC lurkers please don’t share a print screen of this, this frau has anxiety disorders ty.

The blue highlighted range is what I think the reality is closer to being - remember that 100% of subs could be on the lowest two tiers to get an avg subscriber value of £6.50, for £9.50 100% could be on the lowest 3 subs. £4.5k - £6.7k is not remotely an unrealistic figure for her to be netting a month.

Also put 5% fees in cos I do think she’ll be on the legacy tier but need to read and figure out.

View attachment 1158451
PS I know you’re not wealthy cos you’re bleeping thick with it hun, but you’re undoubtedly high income.

Now *that* is forensic maths

 

[Knit one Pearl one]

Imagine claiming to be as poor as a church mouse in the same thread where you've literally just announced you're filming a TV series for which you will be doubtless paid handsomely. The gaslighting is whiplash-inducing.

Wonder how much one earns for presenting their own cookery show. Any guesses?

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Here's Jack in a stunt kitchen from 2015. Fair play she seems to have got through the day without biting the owner of the kitchen or throwing her tit at the walls.

Jack Monroe Cooks In My Kitchen - Mad About The House

Much excitement in The Mad House last week when the Guardian columnist and food blogger Jack Monroe came to film some recipes for a collaboration with Groupon to raise money for Oxfam, for whom she is also an ambassador. She arrived at about 10am walking on a stick having broken about…

www.madaboutthehouse.com

Enid cat is. I never picked up that Jack had been in the house with all the dark walls. She infiltrates everywhere.

Discovered this morning she is is followed by a relatively big running account. Just piss off Jack.

 

[JombleWomble]

Sell your earrings then, love.

This was the most infuriating part of her claiming that she only buys nice things just in case she needs to sell them one day. If your rent payment has bounced 7/8 (whatever TF she claimed) months in a row then the time to sell your valuable items in order to survive would be *checks watch* now.

I don't give a tit (sorry) what she buys or what kind of hob she has. It's the lying that grates. 3 figure net worth, ok hun

She's purposely sowing these seeds now so that when the new show airs she'll have an orchard of "see I told you they're obsessed with these lies about me" fruits to present to her loyal squigs. It's just her way of making sure they assume every criticism is untrue.

I've never watched a JM show, I've only ever seen brief clips, so I'm very excited for a live watch-along with my fellow ninnies I hope it's on at weekends so that I don't risk losing my real life job bybeing too BUSY watching!

 

[Dogmuck]

Wonder how much one earns for presenting their own cookery show. Any guesses?

£34 (dang too short)
3 figures?

 

[HotesTilaire]

Why you sob?
Induction hob.

Grunking but -
Didn’t someone here tell a story about Gino D’campo having an Italian-accentless hissy fit over being asked to do a shoot with an induction hob
Real chefs don’t use induction hobs, apparently. Or slow cookers LOL

 

[Cucumberthunder]

Enid cat is. I never picked up that Jack had been in the house with all the dark walls. She infiltrates everywhere.

Discovered this morning she is is followed by a relatively big running account. Just piss off Jack.

*Waves* hello from running instagrammers! I didn't clock the user name and when I read the comment on the other thread I did wonder if it was JM you were talking about

 

[HotesTilaire]

I wonder how many different truthers there are among us! I was tempted to be a #1978truther but then I looked. There's the #normalsizedarsetruthers, maybe #EEIdontthinksotruthers...you could have a truther for every lie she's told, then we would be legion!

The #1978truther thing is only so hilarious because we know it isn’t true though!