Jack Monroe #189 Food Crime Pie

[Joan of Narc]

I love peaches , just not tinned ones. I don't hate cats, they are just not my pet of choice. I could always sort out your cutlery drawer, whether you kept it tidy after would be up to you.


I am sure we would get on just fine

@MancBee are you the source of the Manchester green parrots? (Bored of Jack's non tweeting so starting my own rumours/chaos)

 

[MancBee]

@MancBee are you the source of the Manchester green parrots? (Bored of Jack's non tweeting so starting my own rumours/chaos)

Unfortunately no. Rumour has it that they were let free when they closed Belle Vue Zoo in 1977. They managed to find places for all the big animals, but just opened the cages for the little birds.

Though I like your rumour better.

 

[HotesTilaire]

He's bought himself a separate flat to write in now, so I wonder. He is a lovely guy though, comes up this way quite often. The village of Naver in his latest book is my nearest large village in disguise, he was up here most of the summer he wrote it.

Do the sheep think he’s alright though?
I just cooked a thai red curry. Micro rice. I used the blue dragon thaipastepot, a stock cube, a few handfuls of frozen veg (green beans, peppers, sweet potato) frozen onion and garlic. Half a tin of coconut milk. The rest of the tin is frozen for the next curry. Microwave rice. I think this probably didn’t cost much for two generous servings. It’s tasty and a kid could do It with supervision. It’s like cooking isn’t actually that hard?it bleeping was yesterday because I couldn’t stand up so I just ate Jaffa cakes and crisps

 

[Bellllls]

I'm very disappointed in myself. I have been influenced. Last night I dreamt I made a stirfry and put sugar puffs in it.

 

[Blurp]

You'd never get a fringe that straight with embroidery scissors, it would be too much little snipping. Plus the scissors would be fucked for sewing usage after going through hair, especially thick hair like Jack's.

I'm in the professionally done camp. And it was done that day too, not the few days she claims.

Yup, looking at the top, that's professional. I cut my own fringe but I use my late mother's proper hairdressing scissors, lovingly retained since her apprenticeship. I deliberately make it choppy as it's a nightmare to get straight. In addition, my hair waves, particularly on short bits like a fringe, so that uneven bits are hidden and even a professional cut looks horribly uneven in five minutes of drying.

My heart dropped at the fringe pic as I was already regretting my (cheap as Covid chips as I am POOR) yellow Mac - went on a weekend jaunt to a seaside town and every other woman of a certain age was wearing one. I am a woman of a certain age. Am I older Jack?

I've got one too - a couple of years ago from George at Asda!

 

[FlashBoof]

It seems the “competition” is just a set of advertorials being run on a load of magazine websites - didn’t click through them all but I imagine they are all in the same publishers stable.

104 cans! Not too shabby - I would keep half a dozen and give the rest to a food bank but I won’t enter because it offers credence to the idea that Del Monte and Jack Monroe is a partnership of worth. Plus, I don’t want the damn books! One of the comper kings and queens can have fun thinking of ways to eat the damn things!

 

[Sideboard Bob]

It seems the “competition” is just a set of advertorials being run on a load of magazine websites - didn’t click through them all but I imagine they are all in the same publishers stable.

104 cans! Not too shabby - I would keep half a dozen and give the rest to a food bank but I won’t enter because it offers credence to the idea that Del Monte and Jack Monroe is a partnership of worth. Plus, I don’t want the damn books! One of the comper kings and queens can have fun thinking of ways to eat the damn things!

Wow, what a find! 104 cans... but how many books?

I couldn’t believe lifedeathprizes .com was a real website but here it is. (No shade to them though, I love ”trashy“ things and have some very lowbrow tastes )

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

It seems the “competition” is just a set of advertorials being run on a load of magazine websites - didn’t click through them all but I imagine they are all in the same publishers stable.

104 cans! Not too shabby - I would keep half a dozen and give the rest to a food bank but I won’t enter because it offers credence to the idea that Del Monte and Jack Monroe is a partnership of worth. Plus, I don’t want the damn books! One of the comper kings and queens can have fun thinking of ways to eat the damn things!

Plan.

We all enter.

The four winners are all tattlers.

We give all of the peaches to Poca.

We send the bungles of books to the various copyright libraries around the U.K. (BL, Bodleian, Cambridge UL, National library of Wales, National library of Scotland) with handwritten notes telling them how worried we are that these national treasures will be lost from history and that these copies are to be kept with Newton’s Principia Mathematica/Darwin’s first edition/ The Cuthbert Gospel.

 

[Readingismyhobby]

How many is in a bundle?

Too many if they are mackies books!

 

[HotesTilaire]

Plan.

We all enter.

The four winners are all tattlers.

We give all of the peaches to Poca.

We send the bungles of books to the various copyright libraries around the U.K. (BL, Bodleian, Cambridge UL, National library of Wales, National library of Scotland) with handwritten notes telling them how worried we are that these national treasures will be lost from history and that these copies are to be kept with Newton’s Principia Mathematica/Darwin’s first edition/ The Cuthbert Gospel.

Before donating the bungle we have to take a recipe each and cook it

 

[fauxpoor]

@traumatised sideboard your portion size I can’t stop laughing

same, babe

 

[Readingismyhobby]

Before donating the bungle we have to take a recipe each and cook it

That’s me out

 

[fauxpoor]

View attachment 573371

@fauxpoor assuming the fringe pic is recent she’s very clearly still in the hotel - you can see the wall colour and AC. How tragic tbh.

Thank(space)you for clarification.
What one earth can she be doing so far away from her son/cat/bunny for all this time?

 

[Funsizes]

These competition websites look dodgy as duck

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Before donating the bungle we have to take a recipe each and cook it

Can we all make wicker men too and present the resulting slop/brick bread/fluorescent cakes to the statues at the solstice?

We can all wave and chant and dance in synchrony around the country as the sun rises on the beautiful June day.

(Long week, sorry for going off piste again. This is what happens when Jack isn’t here.)

 

[Powershower]

On what frequency of consumption have they worked 104 cans out to be a years worth of tinned peaches?

I love tinned peaches for the record, my gran used to give us tinned peaches and ice cream and I’ve been known to indulge in the same even though my Gran is DEAD!
One thing is for certain, I have actively avoided del monte since they partnered with jack monroe, the peoples pov

 

[Sideboard Bob]

These competition websites look dodgy as duck

Agreed, but I’d honestly trust LIFE! DEATH! PRIZES! more with my personal data than I would with a certain smol pixie.

 

[fauxpoor]

it would be usual in rehab to address other, neglected, health concerns. dental, gynae, etc so she may well be having treatment for these too. But she is definitely a rehab outpatient.

You know, I think you could be right here!
Nothing else quite fits totally.
Can you IMAGINE being in rehab with Jack Monroe!
That would be an absolute nightmare.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

On what frequency of consumption have they worked 104 cans out to be a years worth of tinned peaches?

A can of Del Monte™️ to enjoy every 3.5 days. Imagine having to eat that many peaches for an entire year

 

[Hollaaa]

A can of Del Monte™️ to enjoy every 3.5 days. Imagine having to eat that many peaches for an entire year