Jack Monroe #168 Darling, bit gauche

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colouredlines

colouredlines

The lock story also exposes another lie.

The kitten was locked in the bathroom at night. People said this was cruel. Then Jack changed the story: the bathroom door was in fact open, so the kitten could make it into Jack's room and climb into her bed (probably impossible, given her disabilities)
 
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MaineCoonMama

MaineCoonMama

What a Grunka that was, so much to take in.

Dying at the Scottish Squiggle telling her what's what re turnips. I shan't get in to what is classed as a turnip here because it's boring and pointless. Soooo Jack-esque.

Some cats are polydactyl, it's a trait somewhat common in Maine Coons (sadly none in Australia ) but they don't get super door opening powers just cos they got extra tootsies.

Many happy returns to all the birthday Frau und Frauen! You guys are the breast.
 
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FlashBoof

FlashBoof

Dogmuck said:
Happy birthday 🥳 all you birthday bastards - have a great day.

People I cannot find Kirsty, I’m pretty sure I was following her and now nothing. I’ve tried to find her but to no avail- with that said I’m tit on Twitter. Has she done a Jack?
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I think Kirsty (and one of her colleagues) regularity suspend their accounts over weekends so as to have a proper break with their family/child etc.
 
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C

Cariad

OhHeck said:
Does Jack have a magical cat that can open doors by the handle? Why is a bolt required for cat-proofing? Is this a thing cats do? Have I grown up unaware that this is a cat thing? I am a dog person and to keep him out of rooms I do that radical thing of shutting the doors in my house (rented) which has worked a treat for the last 9 years. Nary a bolt in sight.

ETA: Snap @PoorPatrol!
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Pixieboots

Pixieboots

OhHeck said:
Does Jack have a magical cat that can open doors by the handle? Why is a bolt required for cat-proofing? Is this a thing cats do? Have I grown up unaware that this is a cat thing? I am a dog person and to keep him out of rooms I do that radical thing of shutting the doors in my house (rented) which has worked a treat for the last 9 years. Nary a bolt in sight.

ETA: Snap @PoorPatrol!
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My cat knows how to open door handles! He leaps at them and hangs off them by his front paws until his weight pulls them down.
 
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holliebollie

holliebollie

Tie some (poorly) painted tin cans from each (rented) door handle so you can hear if someone is attempting a burglary.

#JackShacks
 
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Dogmuck

Dogmuck

FlashBoof said:
I think Kirsty (and one of her colleagues) regularity suspend their accounts over weekends so as to have a proper break with their family/child etc.
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Ah I know Beth does but never knew KS to, but this could explain it. Was worried our Jackie had spooked her. Thanks 😘
 
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F

FrumpyCat

PoorPatrol said:
She’s said before that her son is almost taller than her. Also, we’ve seen all her stupid (rented) doors, I don’t remember any mendacious locks on them. Also, what’s the point, would you not just pull a door closed at night? Cats don’t have opposable thumbs.... or is Cooper diagnosed as gifted & talented?
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Cats don't work like that. They either find an open window, or wait until you open a door, then slide in when you aren't looking.
 
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