ItsDaniellesjourney #10 aff link this, swipe up that, come on babes pay for my new build tat!

[PotNoodleHead]

I know the general consensus here is that she's boring as fuck. But can I just say... I woke up at 2am the other day, couldn't get back to sleep, so watched that days 'talky stories' from her and it sorted me right out. Out for the count in 10 mins. So it's got its benefits!

 

[ChubClubThug]

If all she ate was those dry scraps and did long dog walks every single day, she'd be a size zero. Show us your secret choccy stash Dirty Dan because it isn't adding up hun. Bit like your marriage

 

[capriallie]

That bed reminds me of when you go back to a guys house and none of his furniture matches. I’m surprised the bedsheets aren’t the New York skyline and there’s a pulp fiction poster on the wall

 

[Jane Porcupine]

Surely they will just slide off her feet? That's not going to be great when she's running with the curry later.

 

[Doingitforthegramhuns]

What on gods green earth was she thinking

 

[JohannaCawffey]

Righto, you lot will have to keep me up to date with Dan's goings on. I've been kicked off Insta for calling Katie Price and her boyfriend a pair of cunts

 

[Catherinez]

‘The book is for the living room so when we are in the living room we can look at it and then keep it on the shelves in the living room.’

Jesus wept, at this point Dan just do the decent thing and finish me off with a rock because I can’t take much more.

 

[HungryHippo]

She needs to update her bio:

Affilate linker
Expert blinker
Dehydrated food creator 🧆
Purchaser of trinkety bits
Adept in the art of dull 🥱

 

[Catherinez]

Audible doesn’t count as reading Dan fucking hell, you are listening to it. That’s like saying I’ve just finished reading a podcast

 

[Hipbones]

Welcome to Stanley Ferry where the most boring woman in Yorkshire is working her first Saturday in years (cos of her aNnUaL lEaVe babes).

In case you missed it, Dan is WFH (non-rented, possibly non-forever home) in her boxroom/office full of wood, clutter and trinkety bits. Her job is to flog mortgages by boring people into submission until they'll sign anything just to get rid of her. If she's on a video call, her weapon of choice is her super-blinking-abilities which have been known to trigger unpleasant symptoms in those poor people she targets.

She may or may not be going to Bali this year depending on the Rona/Bozza situation, listen carefully for any mentions of holidays as she doesn't like to talk about it (except when going to LiSbOn).

Chesney hasn't been seen since she dropped him off at work one Tuesday in August; not saying there's any cause for concern there but she has done an awful lot of work on her patio and Dora isn't allowed to dig in the garden anymore...

Anyway, Ms Orange-Potato-Head would like to thank everyone for their support and comments (all 7 of them in 2021) and will continue to delight us all with her fashion inspo and gourmet tuition throughout 2022.
Don't forget to swipe up!

I’ve just remembered when Chesney walked home with a curry and he drunkenly abandoned it mid-way (only for Dan to retrieve it and reheat it at 3am) and I can’t stop laughing to myself.

Send help please.

 

[PatsyDarlin]

I'm hoping and praying that the next thread is "we know what you did that summer"

 

[#ad#aff]

If the next thread title doesn’t include something about Dani showing off her trinkety bits to strangers then I’m gonna kick off

 

[#ad#aff]

I like to watch her time lapses of cooking food and see the precise moment that the moisture is drained away

 

[elevatordomino]

View attachment 1003115

He knows she’s cheated

Mmmmm he’s a good egg Chez- Extra dry Dan just how you like it. Unless you’re on holiday then it’s wet n wild.

 

[Wowwwwwwwww]

Don't know why but I'm so fuming about that hiking book, when has ever been on a proper one?! Claiming her and Ben love them

Only thing she hikes up is her knickers when she gets her trinkets tickled in marbs.

 

[JohannaCawffey]

What the heck is she doing to that house? Has anyone watched "Escape to the Chateau?" I swear Danielle has done more work to her new build in 6 months than Dick and Angel have done to their massive old French castle in 6 years!
Maybe she's got a film crew with her for a new show "Escape to the Shithole"

 

[bbbbbbb123]

I might be the odd one out here but I find a bath in the morning before work a bit strange, I mean if you haven’t got a shower fair enough but I can’t get my head round it

 

[Hello Kitty]

Fun fact about Dan, when she went on holiday with her uni friends a few years ago she went back to the hotel room of one of my friends who live down south! He had posted a selfie on his stories and I knew who she was instantly. He told my mate that they done everything except sex basically. Poor bug eyes don’t know who he’s actually married to


I feel like I should include the image with half of the face blurred out….


Angry they got interrupted and taken wedding ring off

 

[Catherinez]

Whoever said that their living room looks like a marstons pub has got it spot on, all it needs is some sticky laminated menus and a toilet sign and no one would know the difference

 

[spillthetea22]

Fuck me! Is this the big reveal we’ve been waiting for? Talk about anti climax! Shitty metal drawers = a pantry! Think she needs to Google what a pantry is.