Holidays with friends when you have a boyfriend

[TheScarletgirl]

Friends holidays are the best ! Her mother sounds judgmental . I use to get judged for going on holiday with my friends and not my boyfriend (who doesn't like flying) I don't know why people think you have to be joint to the hip in relationships.

 

[Bae56]

Is there definitely nothing more to it? Does the mother usually get involved to this extent?
Is your friend maybe scared he'll break up with her if she goes since he's said he's not sure about being with her?

 

[RoseBush23]

Actually whilst these thread is still active could I get some more advice?

so my best mate is now not talking to me, I expressed that I was disappointed as we had been talking about this trip since we were teenagers and it all seemed so positive and the the last 2 months her boyfriend said he wasn’t sure how he felt about her. Of course I want her to have children and experience all of that but I know her better than she knows herself and she wanted to start trying in a couple of years time.

Now because he’s been so distance and strange with her she said that she’s Really thought about what she wants to do with her life in the last 2 weeks and that she wants to start trying for a baby; which is great and I will support her in all that she does! She said that we would do our dream trip one day, but I know we won’t, so I just asked her to not make false promises. She then flew off the handle and said she has apologised and that she thought I would understand her decision and be supportive, but obviously she was wrong. That really hurt me as I have always been SO supportive in everything she does, it’s just that I feel she is just saying what her boyfriend wants to hear.

she then turned around and said I can’t do this right now, neither of us can and has spoken to me since. Has she done this because she can’t talk about it because it’s not really what she wants? I’m over the holiday, I was naturally upset of course! But I was more upset that she had not spoken to me about all of this because I’m single, and for some bizzare reason, some people don’t think single people are worthy of advice! I don’t want to lose my best friend over this

thanks so much and sorry it a long one!

 

[jazyblu]

Update if anyone is interested!

woke up this morning from her saying that she can’t go on holiday with me anymore

It is unfortunate but it is her decision. I think going on holiday with friends while in a relationship or married is totally acceptable but going on a once in a lifetime style long haul holiday is a bit different. Perhaps this have goals for this year like moving in together or saving to buy and the holiday is too much financially for that still to come off?
Hopefully at one point you still get your dream holiday!

 

[Tree_]

Omg how is that even an issue. Hope your friend gets a grip and doesn't stitch you up. I leave my partner and kids to go on girls holidays and he happily (used to before he was depressed) do the same. We encourage it. I'll be off to Tenerife next year for a girls holiday

 

[Charsior]

I have a long term BF and I have 2 very very best friends. One my age (C) and one a few years older (A). I have known one for 18 years and the other 15 years. All three of us have become very best friends as we have a big shared interest (keep horses together) these girls mean the world to me! For a few years C and I would holiday to her grandparents in France for a week (without OH, he drops us at the airport and has flown us there (Commercial pilot)). A break for us both and to be looked after by her grandparents which is so lovely of them!
A and I have done trips away (she doesn't like flying) but she has been single up until 2 years ago where she met a great guy!
Now next year is C and my 30th Birthday and we are planning a road trip and want A to come. A said her OH was unsure how he felt about he coming for 2 weeks. I went and spoke to him, told him our rough plans and basically said i have known her for so long its been a bit of a dream to holiday with my best mates, carefree and enjoying the sights, sounds, smells, food and each others company. He felt bad that he shut it down quite so soon and understands. So our planning is underway and both My OH and As OH are told of our plans and asked for opinions.

Maybe you can talk to him?

 

[RoseBush23]

she wants to try for a baby with a guy who “isn’t sure” he wants to be with her and who’s mother seems to do all his talking for him? She’s an idiot.

if she’s your best friend then talk to her. Have a full & Frank conversation about everything- forget the holiday, it’s never going to happen but try to talk to her about this ridiculous notion of having a child with this guy. Are they even in a position to have a child? Do they live together? Do they both work? Do they have support from family? Do they BOTH genuinely want to have a child together? She just sounds absolutely ridiculous.

Yeah they have been together for 11 years and have a house together! I want to talk to her about it but unfortunately she just flies off the handle and doesn’t read or listen to my voice clips! What I don’t understand is he has put her through hell and all that but he hasn’t got any crap from her, it’s all me!