VIDEO SUMMARY: Packing and Pies | Daily Vlog
[DESCRIPTON: Had a fair bit going on today, but in a great kinda way.]
TLDR:
- SHE WENT TO PT
- SHE WENT FOOD SHOPPING
- HER MASK KEPT FALLING DOWN
- SHE WENT TO PICK UP PRINTS
- SHE WENT TO A BAKERY
- SHE ATE A PIE AND A DOUGHNUT
- SHE WENT SKATING WITH A BUNCH OF PEOPLE INSTEAD OF DOING WORK
- SHE POUTED CHILDISHLY BECAUSE FIWL WOULDN'T PUT UP A CURTAIN POLE AT 8:45PM
- SHE ATE ICE CREAM IN BED
KettleVision is still a thing. Willy mug is what she's using today. SO QUIRKY
She lights incense... this is the same intro as her pube video.
She puts her watch on and then whips off her top
Ties her hair up...
She remembers that she's on camera, so sucks her belly in
It's Wednesday for her today. She says she's spent the last 4 days doing the bedroom and she's done a lot of organisation of her "cloves"
She says she took some time out to get the bedroom done
"I HATE LEAVING A TASK HALF FINISHED I HAVE TO SEE IT RIGHT THROUGH TO THE END"...if only she could put that mentality to her half-arsed content.
"IN TERMS OF HELEN'S WORKING WEEK... NORMAL WEEK... IT'S STARTIN' ON A WEDNESDAY... HEH.. HAHAHAHAHA WEEEEEY!
duck YOU MONDAYS!"
Today she's going for her first "in-person" PT session since before Christmas
She's busy today she's got PT and then is going to film a video and then is going to pick up the Scummy Drones art prints and package the 3 that she's sold.
And "HOPEFULLY, MAYBE, FINGERS CROSSED I MIGHT GET A SKATE IN AT SOME POINT TODAY"
Cut to PT, she's set the camera up ready to film herself to prove she works out.
"I WOZ NOT LUKING FORWARD TO THIS THIS MORNING! I WOKE UP DIS MORNING N I SAID TO FIWL I GOT PT TODAY AND WE ALWAYS WARM UP ON THE ROWER AND I JUST DON'T WANNA DO THE ROWER"
We have no idea what Kat is saying because Helga's hoggin the chin mic
"NO NO NO I'LL DO IT!" Helga replies
She makes excuses that she's been doing her bedroom for 4 days "non-stop" (
bleeping lies, she went out to the pub and had her family over) and she's on her period a week early - poor baby is "
bleeping EXHAUSTED"
She throws her nose up in the air to whine "EHHH I DUNT WANT TA MOOOOVE MA LEGS!"
"BUT IT'S FINE, IT'S FINE"
She waddles over to the weight rack to do deadlifts
She checks herself out as she starts her work out "OOH MA HAIR'S ALL FLUFFY TODAY, I GET MA HAIR DUN NEXT WEEK!!!!!!"
She's chatting all the way through this work out about her
bleeping hair
She's so excited because she'll also be going out for dinner with her manager Ryan and she complains that she hasn't really had the opportunity to properly hang out with him because of "Y'KNOW... LOCKDOWN"
She says she's signed to Gleam when "THINGS" started...
"SO IT WILL BE NICE TO HAVE LIKE A PROPER..... LUNCHY -EON"
She stops to complain about her grubby necklaces becoming so tangled.
She's asking Kat what weight she's putting on her bar now "AM I GUNNA BE STRONG GURL?"
Cut to her lifting - we don't know how much she's lifting but she's lifting and complaining about her armpits being so hairy so it can't be much.
"HELLOOOOO!" She yells to her armpit hair
She's finished now. Cut to her filling up with petrol. Cut to her going food shopping.
Her mask looks like it's going to fall off her ear any second now
She's in the George section and her mask falls down
She pulls it up over her nose, but it starts slipping down again
"THIS IS THE REASON WHY I'M EXCITED TO HAVE CHILDREN!!" She says while zooming into a pair of kids leopard print leggings
"I CAN'T WAIT TO DRESS THEM"
bleeping hell.
Barely out of the supermarket and Helga yanks off her mask which was slipping down as she was waddling out of there
"I DUN IT! I DIDN'T GET TOO DISTRACTED!"
She got what she needed "AND A COUPLE OF OTHER LITTLE BIIIIITS"
Cut to home, she's showered and dressed. Now her camera goes crazy in and out of focus as she has ArseVision as she takes out her washing.
She's got a wall-mounted washing line now as the one she had on the grass was "WELL DODGE"
Now she's getting on with some "work"
Cut to her yelling at Diane for trying to get under the covers
"I DON'T WANT YER CHEEZY PITS UNDER THE BED!!! THEY'RE NEW BED SHEETS!!!"
She's finished filming her video about her pubes and she's going to edit it but she's got "A LOAD" of emails to catch up on, she says dreary
She retakes that and says that with a bit more pep.
She yells at Lola because she keeps barking today
"UGH.... I WOZ GUNNA GO SKATIN'...." She whines before saying "HELEN STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT, PRIORITISE WOT YOU NEED TO PRIORITISE... RIGHT?"
She starts making groaning throat sounds before cutting to her going out again.
She's off to pick up her prints.
"YEAH
witch!"
"I'M GOING TO THE SCREEN PRINTERS TO PICK UP SUNNY BONES ART PRINTS FROM WELL.... GUD? WELL.... NICE? WELL GUD? I FINK IT'S WELL GUD..."
(it's not it's Well Nice)
"THEY WERE.... UHHHHH... I FINK IT'S THE SAME PEOPLE...? IT'S THE SAME PEOPLE WE WERE USING BEFORE"
Nice of her to remember their names.
Not content with all the places she's stopped off at already, she wants to nip to Bread Sauce because it's around the corner.
"I'M VERY MUCH OF A OPPORTUNIST WHEN IT COMES TO FOOD." we know, Helga,
"I LOVE THE TREAT-OS"
She's got her skates in the back of the car just in case she can squeeze in a skate with the gang
She goes into the studio and yells "HELLOOOO!" at the dog.
She's back in the car now
"THAT'S ONE FING I'M LIKE, SUPER CONSCIOUS OF.... ONLINE SELLING FINGS IS I JUST WANNA MAKE SURE THAT THE PACKAGING IT COMES IN IS AS ECO-FRIENDLY OR RECYCLABLE AS POSSIBLE... BECAUSE... I FINK IF YOU CAN HELP... IF IT WILL HELP
tit LIKE THAT THEN DO IT"
(Funny that she says that but she'll keep going out to get takeaways and food that's wrapped in all sorts of unrecyclable shite, she accepts so much PR still which is also filled with plastic and goes to waste)
She complains about a growing skin tag on her neck which is catching on her necklaces. She might get it removed, she says as she plays around with it.
"UGH... AND IT'S A LITTLE WOBBLY! BLUHLULULULULUL!"
She hyperventilates at the Bread shop being open, she's drooling as she lists off all this
tit she wants to eat
"I WANT TO GET SOMEFING SAVORY AND I WANT SOMEFING SWEET... AND I MIGHT GET A COFFEE" She then screams "OH MY GOD I LOVE BREAD SOUCE SO MUCHAAAAAAH!!!"
She's been in and she's back in the car now. She says she got too excited in there "AND I PROBABLY MADE A BIT OF A SCENE!"
Jesus Christ.
"BUT IT'S EXCITING, BAKERY'S REALLY EXCITE ME!"
She got a Mediterranean pie
She got a mocha doughnut
She puts the pie in her mouth before taking it out to say "OH I GOT A FLAT WHITE"
Then shoves it back in again
Ugh the noise of her munching into her chin mic
She's speaking wiv her mouth full "OH MY GOD OH MY FUCKIN' GOD"
She's saying it's sooooo full of flavour and is packed.
Hungry Helga throws her head back out roars with a mouthful of food "WOOOOOOOW!"
She's so
bleeping gross. I bet she didn't even bother to sanitise her hands before she ate.
She's off skating now. I love how she blurs out her number plate, yet doesn't bother to blur out the car next to hers...
She was debating whether to go home and do some work, but because it's a nice day she's just going skating.
"OH A MASK!"
"DEZE ARE DA MOXI PAMFURS" She yells to the small crowd of skaters who have also turned up.
"COR I JUST LOVE DAT PERFUME. IT'S MY HAPPY SMELL" she says randomly while skating with someone.
"IT REMINDS ME OF MY.... FUH.. MY... SEE I HAVE DIS FING WHERE I GO ON HOLIDAY FROM DE AIRPORT BECAUSE IT MAKES ME... FINK OF...." She gasps for air "IT'S LIKE... WEN I WEAR IT.... I FINK OF... DAT TIME?"
Why is she talking like a 5 year old?
Oop, she's still going. This girl next to her is just "yepping" along
"AND I BOUGHT CHLOE WEN I WENT TO VANCOOOOOHER BECAUSE MY BEST FRIEND WENT OUT THERE AND I WENT TO VISIT HER AND SO WHEN I PUT IT ON NOW I FINK OF MA BEST FRIEND"
What a long
bleeping way to say that.
She's back home now.
"DAT WOZ NEEDED. DAT WOZ FUN. GUD TIME. GUUUUD TIMES."
Fiwl's hopping around indoors, he's getting ready for a run.
"HELLOOOOO YOU OKAY?" She yells
"YEAH, YOU?" He replies, doing whatever... this move is
"YEP" says Helga "YOU WARMIN' UP?"
No dingus he's having a
bleeping stroke. What does it look like he's doing.
Oop, actually he's summoning
bleeping demons
He does lunges towards the camera and Helga giggles like a child "HE HE HEEEEE HE HEHE HEEEEEH!"
Whilst Fiwl's out she's going to print off labels for her prints
"NOW THEY'RE HERE I'M GUNNA POST ABOUT IT LIKE THEY'RE HERE! ORDER ONE! ORDER ONE! ORDER ONE! ORDER ONE!"
She says that she puts in a "free" sticker for every order
She then moans about where she got her stickers from, she thought she'd ordered a whole reel of stickers but they're printed two per A4 page.
"AND I'M PRETTY PISSED OFF BY THAT. I FINK IT'S SUCH A WASTE!" Says the person who has to go to the dump every
bleeping week.
She says that learning about postage is "scary but kewl"
"DIS ONE'S GOING ALL THE WAY TO LOS ANGELES! WOW!! DAT'S MAD!!!"
"YOU GOING ON HOLIDAY!" She sings to the t-shirt
She talks about having to wait till May to get a new round of t-shirts printed. She's touching her face and sniffing as she's packing. Yum.
Cut to her yelling up the stairs to Fiwl "SHALL WE DO SUM TEA?"
Now she's singing to the dogs.
Cut to Fiwl crying on the floor because this is his life now... I mean he's playing with the dogs.
She's got a plant based dinner.
Now she's putting up her curtain pole.... with great difficulty
"WHY DID I DO THAT? HELEN IS SUCH A
twit SUMTIMES" She says to herself "I'M GUNNA BREAK SUMFINK SOON"
She then pulls a face and starts whinging
"I DUNNO WOT I DO"
She says If her mum's watching this she'd be pissing herself "SAVAGE SUEEEEE!"
She grunts and groans trying to put the brackets up
"I HATE MYSELF!"
She's just constantly complaining.
She passes Fiwl as she goes to get some higher steps and says that she's getting it all wrong
"PROBABLY" he replies.
I think Fiwl's in bed, he's complaining
"IT'S POINTING RIGHT AT ME AND IT'S REALLY ANNOYING!" He moans about the light.
Helga turns it and now pretends she's on stage
"HELLOOOOO!"
She send Fiwl to his van to get her something
"OH LOOK IT'S GONE ON THE WONK!" She complains
Before whining to Fiwl to go "OH GOOOO ON... JUST DO IT FOR ME, IT WILL TAKE YOU FIVE SECONDS TO DO THIS. IT'LL TAKE ME TWENTY HOURS"
Fiwl cackles loudly at her.
He wants to do it tomorrow
"NO I WANT TO DO IT NOW!" Demands Helga
"DO YOU HAVE TO DO IT NOW? IT'S QUARTER TO NINE!" Asks Fiwl
"YEAH!" Yells Helga, putting her foot up onto the radiator
"DON'T STAND ON THE RADIATOR" Warns Fiwl
"I'M NOT! I'M JUST PUTTIN MA FOOT ON IT!" She says with a moody tone
Fiwl's had it with her
tit
"IT'S QUARTER TO NINE AT NIGHT! I'VE BEEN AT WORK ALL DAY.... YOU'VE HAD A BUSY DAY. WE'VE ALL HAD A BUSY DAY. WE'VE JUST HAD DINNER AND CLEARED UP THAT DOESN'T NEED TO BE DONE RIGHT NOW DOES IT?"
(LOL she's had a busy day.
witch could have done this instead of stuffing doughnuts and pies in the car or instead of going skating)
Helga pouts and sighs loudly
She stabs her belly with the screwdriver and quietly says "....NO"
"NO... YER RIGHT... IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE DUN RIGHT NOW" She snot sighs loudly, but still stands up on the steps hoping that Fiwl will change his mind if she keeps pouting
"YOU'RE JUST STRESSING YOURSELF OUT FOR NO REASON," says Fiwl
Helga interrupts him "YER RIGHT!! IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE DUN RIGHT NOW! I NEED TA...." She inhales loudly as she gets down the steps, she stops halfway and pouts - hoping that Fiwl will give in.
"I KNOW YOU WANT TO GET IT DONE AND YOU'RE EXCITED," Says Fiwl as Helga stabs her thigh with the screwdriver in frustration
"YOU'RE LIKE A CHILD" notes Fiwl,
"I AM NOT LIKE A CHILD!!!!!" Sulks Helga, "I'M LIKE YOU! YOU'RE IMPATIENT! YOU LIKE GETTIN' FINGS DUN!"
Erm, no Helga. You are a child. The difference between you and Fiwl is that he can get things done, you always need someone to hold your hand and fix your
duck ups.
"AND YOOOU DON'T STOP FINKING ABOUT FINGS UNTIL DER DUN!" She carries on this bizarre twisting it to be Fiwl's fault... "SO YOU KNOW WOT IT'S LIKE TO BEEEE ME!"
She starts packing up
"BUT THEN I'M BEING THE... YOU'RE BEING THE ME IN THIS SITUATION BECAUSE I'M DER ON THAT'S NORMALLY TELLIN YOOOOU.... JUST FORGET ABOUT IT DER'S ALWAYS TOMORROW"
Helga caves and she's going to do it tomorrow.... I mean, she could have done it today if she got whatever she needed out of Fiwl's van herself... but okay...
She decides to make herself a cup of tea.
She climbs into bed and finally asks Fiwl how his run was (wasn't that like 4 hours ago?)
She asks Fiwl for her ice cream and they eat it in bed.
She's done her skincare in bed.
Fiwl's locked the dogs in their dungeon
Helga wipes a jade roller around her face and then puts it all over Fiwl's face. Yum.
She thanks us for watching.