Have you ever known someone who went missing or was murdered?

[Jayjay0203]

When my dad was posted in Germany with the Army a little girl went missing from one of the military shops. She went shopping with her parents, her mum stood at the checkout and turned to grab something and when she turned back the toddler was gone.
her name was katrice lee, and it’s been over 40 years and there’s no clue where she went.

 

[BorisBear]

When my dad was posted in Germany with the Army a little girl went missing from one of the military shops. She went shopping with her parents, her mum stood at the checkout and turned to grab something and when she turned back the toddler was gone.
her name was katrice lee, and it’s been over 40 years and there’s no clue where she went.

I’ve read & listen to podcasts about this, so sad

 

[Lovesitmate]

I live in Brisbane Australia. The primary school I went to had a disco one night and other schools were invited to come. Anyway One of the girls decided to leave the party and go for a walk. She was attacked By a man who was out on bail (he NEVER ever should have been let out of prison- he is truly sick in the head) he raped her several times and did horrific things to her her family never recovered, her parents divorced her mother turned into a raging alcoholic. I still see her dad sometimes, he has a boat and he named it after her. Just so horrible

Horrific this rings a bell too, what year was it?

 

[emm]

Horrific this rings a bell too, what year was it?

I cannot remember the name of the girl but I am pretty sure I listened to a Casefile podcast on this. horrific

 

[nicolaleach89]

Went to Tenerife In 2013 had the best holiday and made friends with a couple of guys from
Manchester, usual story kept in touch on Facebook... he was murdered last year by his girlfriend in Dukinfield Manchester. Was absolutely horrified.

I was also at work one day when a baby who had been murdered was brought in. Never forget watching the consultant I worked with run off to vomit he’s never been the same since.

I'm from dukinfield thts sad to hear xx

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

Horrific this rings a bell too, what year was it?

Do you know her name? Sounds absolutely horrific

 

[princessmaire80]

My brother in law (although he is unaware that he has a sister in law; he’s been missing since long before husband and I were together) has been missing for years. I’ve tried looking for him with husband’s help, but unfortunately he has an extremely common name and husband believes he may have changed the spelling to make it even more common.
I have never actually met him, and I know it’s caused my father in law some heartbreak. Father in law is getting older and I said to husband it’s sad that he’s probably going to die without knowing what happened to his son. His biological mother (parents were divorced and both remarried) died a fair few years ago, but by all accounts she wasn’t all that bothered (long story that I won’t go into as it’s potentially identifying)
He’s missed out on a lot and my husband has said on a few occasions he would love to at least find out what happened to him, and would like to know if he ever managed to settle.
Never known anyone who was murdered, thankfully.

He doesn't know him personally but apparently he comes across as a very cold man from one's who do know him but I believe he is very distant even to family. I personally believe he had played a big part in what happened to maddie.

I used to work in the same hospital as him in Leicestershire and I know people who have worked with him; they all said he’s a very good doctor but he’s incredibly full of himself and very abrupt.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

My brother in law (although he is unaware that he has a sister in law; he’s been missing since long before husband and I were together) has been missing for years. I’ve tried looking for him with husband’s help, but unfortunately he has an extremely common name and husband believes he may have changed the spelling to make it even more common.
I have never actually met him, and I know it’s caused my father in law some heartbreak. Father in law is getting older and I said to husband it’s sad that he’s probably going to die without knowing what happened to his son. His biological mother (parents were divorced and both remarried) died a fair few years ago, but by all accounts she wasn’t all that bothered (long story that I won’t go into as it’s potentially identifying)
He’s missed out on a lot and my husband has said on a few occasions he would love to at least find out what happened to him, and would like to know if he ever managed to settle.
Never known anyone who was murdered, thankfully.


I used to work in the same hospital as him in Leicestershire and I know people who have worked with him; they all said he’s a very good doctor but he’s incredibly full of himself and very abrupt.

I always find it sad when people just decide to disappear for no apparant reason. I kinda want to tell them the least you can do is leave a note to tell people.
Most family find it traumatic and difficult to deal with.

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

I always find it sad when people just decide to disappear for no apparant reason. I kinda want to tell them the least you can do is leave a note so tell people.
Mostly family find it traumatic and difficult to deal with.

Imagine not having any kind of closure at all? It must be awful

 

[emm]

I always find it sad when people just decide to disappear for no apparant reason. I kinda want to tell them the least you can do is leave a note so tell people.
Mostly family find it traumatic and difficult to deal with.

it is apparently abig phenomenon in japan, so much so that they have a word for it https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jouhatsu
I agree though, it must be absolute hell for the family/friends just hoping they might show up again one day, as awful as knowing someone has been murdered, at least you have some sense of closure

 

[Homesweethomesweethome]

This one has already been mentioned but I’ll share.
New Year’s Day murder by the head teacher, pre meditated, his wife was spending it with her fella (he’s my friend of a friend link) from running club his mum knew what he was going to do, she had the children asleep and didn’t call the police until much too late.
He climbed over the wall, and got in through the patio doors, they didn’t wake until he burst in their bedroom and he stabbed them to death. Sad thing is the boyfriend’s ex partner in this wasn’t ready for him to move on and still had somewhat of a candle that they might reconcile.

 

[princessmaire80]

Last time he showed up was in 1996. Neither husband or his dad have moved since then; I suppose the saving grace is that should he turn up one day he could come back either here or to his dad and they would both be in the same place. I do worry about if that happened though- especially if he turned up here. My husband is very mentally unwell and has been for years and I’m not sure if he could accept it.
As awful as it sounds I do agree, I think it would be easier for everyone if we found out something had happened to him.
I’ve tried everything I can think of and he’s literally just vanished into thin air. We looked into the Salvation Army tracing service but as husband’s parents weren’t married when he was born they wouldn’t help. My husband thinks he’s either emigrated to Ireland, where his dad’s family are from, or he’s in prison. If he has emigrated to Ireland there’s even less chance of finding him, his name is very common in England but in Ireland it’s basically the equivalent of John Smith in England (not exactly but that sort of level of common if you see what I mean)

 

[emm]

Last time he showed up was in 1996. Neither husband or his dad have moved since then; I suppose the saving grace is that should he turn up one day he could come back either here or to his dad and they would both be in the same place. I do worry about if that happened though- especially if he turned up here. My husband is very mentally unwell and has been for years and I’m not sure if he could accept it.
As awful as it sounds I do agree, I think it would be easier for everyone if we found out something had happened to him.
I’ve tried everything I can think of and he’s literally just vanished into thin air. We looked into the Salvation Army tracing service but as husband’s parents weren’t married when he was born they wouldn’t help. My husband thinks he’s either emigrated to Ireland, where his dad’s family are from, or he’s in prison. If he has emigrated to Ireland there’s even less chance of finding him, his name is very common in England but in Ireland it’s basically the equivalent of John Smith in England (not exactly but that sort of level of common if you see what I mean)

I am so sorry for this, I cannot imagine how awful it is. Have you thought about a private investigator? (obviously I am aware this is very expensive so may not be an option)

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

I am so sorry for this, I cannot imagine how awful it is. Have you thought about a private investigator? (obviously I am aware this is very expensive so may not be an option)

I was just about to suggest the exact same thing. It may be looking into, even just for your father in laws sake. It must be heartbreaking.

 

[Justwishfulthinking]

Last time he showed up was in 1996. Neither husband or his dad have moved since then; I suppose the saving grace is that should he turn up one day he could come back either here or to his dad and they would both be in the same place. I do worry about if that happened though- especially if he turned up here. My husband is very mentally unwell and has been for years and I’m not sure if he could accept it.
As awful as it sounds I do agree, I think it would be easier for everyone if we found out something had happened to him.
I’ve tried everything I can think of and he’s literally just vanished into thin air. We looked into the Salvation Army tracing service but as husband’s parents weren’t married when he was born they wouldn’t help. My husband thinks he’s either emigrated to Ireland, where his dad’s family are from, or he’s in prison. If he has emigrated to Ireland there’s even less chance of finding him, his name is very common in England but in Ireland it’s basically the equivalent of John Smith in England (not exactly but that sort of level of common if you see what I mean)

This is just tragic. Does your husband have an idea of what his brother would want to run away from? For him to think he’s potentially in prison indicates he’s got a chaotic backstory. So sorry to hear your husband has mental health issues and sure this situation and potentially what’s led to it must have impacted in some way. Hope you all find some peace and answers x

 

[princessmaire80]

This is just tragic. Does your husband have an idea of what his brother would want to run away from? For him to think he’s potentially in prison indicates he’s got a chaotic backstory. So sorry to hear your husband has mental health issues and sure this situation and potentially what’s led to it must have impacted in some way. Hope you all find some peace and answers x

Thank you for your kind words
There was some childhood issues around their parents split, we only got married in 2020 as husband always said he never wanted to get married due to what happened with his parents. But when my beloved dad was dying he suddenly changed his mind and we got married just in time (my dad died five days after the wedding)

My hubby had a breakdown in 2006 which was caused by overwork- he was working very long shifts with very little time off and his body just had enough. It left him with a long term mental illness. He still works full time in the same job but with dramatically reduced hours, he works day shift now and only 4 days per week of normal length shifts, whereas before he worked 6 night shifts of 12 hours per week with only one day off which often he would work as overtime so he was regularly working 90-100 hour weeks. And he did that for some years.

I’ve been with my husband for 17 years and he’s still a bit guarded about his childhood. He’s told me bits and pieces here and there but I know very little about his brother and what he was like. I know things were difficult for them as they were growing up, he did say his brother couldn’t settle in a job and was very flighty. Husband left school at 16 and went straight into a cadetship scheme in the job he still does, 36 years later, and saved like mad to buy a house, which is now our marital home. His brother is a few years older and I can only imagine that he was more badly affected by what happened as my husband was only a toddler when it all went off and doesn’t much remember the initial split.

All I can guess is that he wants to distance himself which I understand. My husband doesn’t really speak to his family much either; his dad remarried and his new wife wasn’t bothered about him or his brother, especially when his stepbrother was born. And he is very much the golden child.

 

[Dizzy]

I know of murders of a couple of people through friends of friends. Firstly an friend's girlfriend was murdered by her neighbour back in the late 90s. It was a huge case, national coverage. She was about 18, a couple of years younger than me and went missing on her way home from a nightclub that I used to go to. It transpired that her neighbour, who was on the police radar for things like stealing underwear off washing lines and nuisance calls had killed her about 50 yards from home. His mother tried to cover it up but his uncle was a police officer and recognised several things that identified him and gave her a "if you don't turn him in, I will" ultimatum. She's buried not far from where I live and I often think about her.

Then a couple of years ago my friends brother in law was murdered by his, at the time unknown, second wife. He'd led a completely secret life for 20 odd years, married to someone else with a son and his secret wife stabbed him on Boxing Day and then killed herself! Again it was all over the news. The marriage with the first wife wasn't a particularly happy one (clearly!) but she was almost more shocked about the other secret life than she was about the murder!

 

[ThatB***hCarolBaskin]

Not quite, but my friends dad murdered 4 people

 

[emm]

Not quite, but my friends dad murdered 4 people

what was the circumstance?! like all at once or...?!

 

[Melian]

Not murder but did used to know someone who is now a convicted peadophile