I think the parents knew he was going to kill himself. There was no way out for him. They pretty much went straight to where his body was.
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They’re culpable. I hope they rot.
Sadly true
So sad. The footage of her in the back of the police car….. I just wanted to jump through to screen, hug her and keep her safe.
RIP Gabby.A good article for anyone who doesn’t have Netflix
archive.ph
The inside story of how Gabby Petito was murdered by her boyfriend: F…
archived 19 Feb 2025 04:33:51 UTC
Watching the Netflix documentary and it’s so insane to me that the one van life couple posted the video to YouTube instead of referring it to the police teams. So much could have gone wrong there with people interfering and the news
My unpopular opinion is that I understand why the police initially took Brian’s side - we can no longer just work on the assumption that the woman is always being abused and isn’t the abuser. I think what’s more concerning is that there isn’t a set process to follow to ensure that the violence doesn’t progress. It’s all good to say you’re separating them and it’s on them to not come back together for the night but we all know that’s not how coercive relationships end, and it’s just for one night. It’s just washing your hands off of the situation and hoping it doesn’t progress to someone being killed or being injured further
My unpopular opinion is that I understand why the police initially took Brian’s side - we can no longer just work on the assumption that the woman is always being abused and isn’t the abuser. I think what’s more concerning is that there isn’t a set process to follow to ensure that the violence doesn’t progress. It’s all good to say you’re separating them and it’s on them to not come back together for the night but we all know that’s not how coercive relationships end, and it’s just for one night. It’s just washing your hands off of the situation and hoping it doesn’t progress to someone being killed or being injured further
The police were responding to a 911 call telling them that he'd witnessed BL repeatedly slapping Gabby.
I was also shocked the vanlife couple posted that... it was obviously for the views and to promote their channel which is disgusting.
Through out the whole thing they acknowledged that both of them had injured each other and that they both claimed it started far earlier in the day
I get it but also if the roles were reversed and the police shrugged their shoulders and the man being the victim of abuse it would be as problematic
Also, unfortunately the reality is probably that in any case they wouldn’t have done much more than that anyway even if they “enforced” the law because ultimately once you get to “enforcement” part of it it’s usually someone else who decides the charges and whatever else
They were totally in the documentary for the views too as I noticed she said she uploaded it to Red, White & Bethune rather than just saying “we uploaded it to our channel” which would’ve sounded more natural
The domestic violence lethality assessment questions (mentioned in the closing titles of ep3) are excellent. Should be widely adopted
• Has the aggressor ever used a weapon against the victim or threatened the victim with a weapon?
• Has the aggressor ever threatened to kill the victim or the victim's children?
• Does the victim believe the aggressor will try to kill them?
• Does the aggressor have a gun or could easily get a gun?
• Has the aggressor ever tried to choke the victim?
• Does the aggressor get violently or constantly jealous or control most of the daily activities of the victim?
• Has the victim left or separated trom the aggressor after they were living together or married?
• Is the aggressor unemployed?
• Has the aggressor ever attempted suicide to the best of the victim's knowledge?
• Does the victim have a child that the aggressor believes is not the aggressor's biological child?
• Does the aggressor follow or spy on the victim or leave threatening messages for the victim?
• Is there anything else that worries the victim?
• Has the aggressor ever used a weapon against the victim or threatened the victim with a weapon?
• Has the aggressor ever threatened to kill the victim or the victim's children?
• Does the victim believe the aggressor will try to kill them?
• Does the aggressor have a gun or could easily get a gun?
• Has the aggressor ever tried to choke the victim?
• Does the aggressor get violently or constantly jealous or control most of the daily activities of the victim?
• Has the victim left or separated trom the aggressor after they were living together or married?
• Is the aggressor unemployed?
• Has the aggressor ever attempted suicide to the best of the victim's knowledge?
• Does the victim have a child that the aggressor believes is not the aggressor's biological child?
• Does the aggressor follow or spy on the victim or leave threatening messages for the victim?
• Is there anything else that worries the victim?
Thanks for sharing the questions, I wondered what they were.
The Laundries are pieces of tit and if they handed their precious son over he would still be alive today. I do often wander if the Laundries struck a deal because at the least they should've been convicted for obstruction. However I also wonder if one of the reasons they got off so lightly is because of all the media surrounding this. A case could be made that they would never receive a fair trial.
The police who pulled them over imo really had tied hands. You cannot force an adult to do anything. Especially if they deny what is going on and she was even begging to stay with Brian. Yes, they even said privately she'll end up dead but what can they do?
It’s insane to me that there’s a possibility that his parents were totally fine with him going off and killing himself rather than just facing the music
They went through the effort of lawyering up and everything, and yet didn’t seem to use that lawyer much beyond just refusing to cooperate with everyone
They went through the effort of lawyering up and everything, and yet didn’t seem to use that lawyer much beyond just refusing to cooperate with everyone
It's a sad case. I couldn't work out the group dynamics at the start. They seemed such an odd couple. Then an ex boyfriend pop up half way through the documentary. His parents and family are just dark.
I found this particularly confusing because by the end it seems that he was close to her family? I couldn’t particularly work out whether that was because the situation brought them all together or whether he had kept in touch with her family previous to that as well
Gabby really reminds me of Kirsten Dunst - her voice, looks and mannerismsThere was a Lifetime TV movie made about the case too (sorry if it's already been mentioned) - the woman who played Gabby was very much like her.
Such a sad story ... she seemed like a lovely, gentle soul
I don’t know if this is a complete overreach but I think the reason why the police endangered Gaby so catastrophically is a response to a recent cultural fad. One that I think is very entrenched but now getting some pushback.
The police seemed to me like they had completely assimilated the notion that the difference between men and women is very small or blurred at best and nonexistent at worst. It looked to me that their assessment was informed by cultural memes like the girl boss trope, that women are physically as strong as men, and that being a woman doesn’t automatically make you vulnerable. How on earth else would they think it was a good idea to leave a kid to sleep alone in a van while the older boyfriend is sent to a domestic violence shelter/hotel for the night. The other important consequence of this lack of distinction and the culture at the time is that anyone can be a victim, so we mustn’t assume anymore that the man is always the perpetrator. How else would they forget so quickly they’d been called by a witness who saw him slap her repeatedly. They were very fast to assume she didn’t cause the scratches on his face defending herself or in distress but that she was the primary offender. I don’t think ten years ago this would have been the case. We also must queer everything and never assume we know something because everything is relative or a social construct. I think this is what gave the police the idea that contrary to common sense and experience, and that chances of the girl being the abuser were tiny , that it was not just possible but likely that she was abusing her boyfriend. There are nasty women around, of course, but there was very little to suggest Gaby was the tiny exception of a sadly very common rule. One of the policemen was also very fast to show his “understanding” of mental health issues and was massively projecting his own wife’s behaviour on Gaby . My wife has anxiety as well, he said, and the implication is that he meant she acts irrationally too and a shower sorts her out. That idea is what prevented him from looking at her anxiety as being provoked by a controlling and increasingly threatening man.
In my opinion what killed her at the end was calling her ex boyfriend. I think Brian saw the messages on her phone and that later in the evening he either feared she was going to leave him or gaby told him she was, and we all know that’s the most dangerous time for a victim of DV, when they try to leave.
Poor girl.
The police seemed to me like they had completely assimilated the notion that the difference between men and women is very small or blurred at best and nonexistent at worst. It looked to me that their assessment was informed by cultural memes like the girl boss trope, that women are physically as strong as men, and that being a woman doesn’t automatically make you vulnerable. How on earth else would they think it was a good idea to leave a kid to sleep alone in a van while the older boyfriend is sent to a domestic violence shelter/hotel for the night. The other important consequence of this lack of distinction and the culture at the time is that anyone can be a victim, so we mustn’t assume anymore that the man is always the perpetrator. How else would they forget so quickly they’d been called by a witness who saw him slap her repeatedly. They were very fast to assume she didn’t cause the scratches on his face defending herself or in distress but that she was the primary offender. I don’t think ten years ago this would have been the case. We also must queer everything and never assume we know something because everything is relative or a social construct. I think this is what gave the police the idea that contrary to common sense and experience, and that chances of the girl being the abuser were tiny , that it was not just possible but likely that she was abusing her boyfriend. There are nasty women around, of course, but there was very little to suggest Gaby was the tiny exception of a sadly very common rule. One of the policemen was also very fast to show his “understanding” of mental health issues and was massively projecting his own wife’s behaviour on Gaby . My wife has anxiety as well, he said, and the implication is that he meant she acts irrationally too and a shower sorts her out. That idea is what prevented him from looking at her anxiety as being provoked by a controlling and increasingly threatening man.
In my opinion what killed her at the end was calling her ex boyfriend. I think Brian saw the messages on her phone and that later in the evening he either feared she was going to leave him or gaby told him she was, and we all know that’s the most dangerous time for a victim of DV, when they try to leave.
Poor girl.
I don't think victim blaming (or even victims self-blaming) in cases of domestic violence is a new thing, sadly.
Yes. Especially Kirstin Dunst from The Virgin Suicides
Having now seen the Netflix series I'm convinced Brian's parents knew precisely what he did to poor Gabby.
Those phone records were damming. Making calls THEN hiring a lawyer & not working with the police were all red flags.
I'm pretty sure it was no coincidence either that they 'found' him. I mean imagine that as a complete stranger let alone being a loved one. His condition was dire too.
Gabbys family were exemplary throughout.
Any idea or speculation of what the settlement with the Laundrie might be regarding?
Those phone records were damming. Making calls THEN hiring a lawyer & not working with the police were all red flags.
I'm pretty sure it was no coincidence either that they 'found' him. I mean imagine that as a complete stranger let alone being a loved one. His condition was dire too.
Gabbys family were exemplary throughout.
Any idea or speculation of what the settlement with the Laundrie might be regarding?