I don’t know if she has YouTube but her Instagram is tiarahjoy. I’m not a fan of her stories, to be honest. A lot of body checking, ridiculous filters, and posting #aff links for horrible clothes.
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
I'd really love to know what went down there. She's dancing around on TikTok in her underwear now, pouting at the camera, having previously lectured her viewers on female modesty. What brings about this sort of U turn? A marriage may break down but if you actually believed in the religion, how do you stop believing so suddenly?
Does anyone know what Eva's mother died of? Was it breast cancer?
The two sisters share a habit of being preachy esp about topics they don't know much about, don't they?
The two sisters share a habit of being preachy esp about topics they don't know much about, don't they?
I think her mother died quite suddenly. I’m not sure what from though.
I feel a bit mean for being even remotely critical of anyone suffering genuine grief after two bereavements and especially after a still birth, which must have been so traumatic. But. Am I the only one who feels Eva is becoming totally self absorbed in her grief rituals and needs help? She doesn't seem to be working or doing anything to give structure to her days - I assume poor Alen, who is also bereaved, though I appreciate he didn't actually have to give birth, is supporting them both financially. To be honest, I know Ukrainian refugees who have witnessed mass slaughter of husbands and children who are appearing more functional and motivated to try and heal. I do feel for Eva because she is a really decent young woman but it does feel as if she is being allowed to sink into total self absorbed depression.
I did worry that after Olive’s party she wouldn’t have anything to occupy herself with 
Agreed.
I suffered a life-changing loss 10 years ago, and what got me through was being asked to work on a project. It was tough at first but having that structure helped me to not descend into unhealthy grieving habits. Staying at home with no purpose only made me dwell on the life I ought to have been leading if my partner hadn’t died.
I suffered a life-changing loss 10 years ago, and what got me through was being asked to work on a project. It was tough at first but having that structure helped me to not descend into unhealthy grieving habits. Staying at home with no purpose only made me dwell on the life I ought to have been leading if my partner hadn’t died.
I was actually surprised and impressed that she is trying to pull herself together. Trying to have structure to her day, having small goals and projects, going to back to work, going out of her house. There are days when she seems to fail doing those things, but from her IG it seems there are days when she gets stuff done. The other day she edited the video of Olive's party, today she cleaned up her kitchen cupboards and looks like she had coffee and cake in a cafe. Also, she wants to move on. She posts about learning to live with grief and to find hope again.
It would be nice if she undertook a project or a charity fundraiser to commemorate her mother and baby. Or even just go on a trip abroad like in the old days. A change in scenery would do her good. I'm sure her mother and baby would like her to be happy.
It looks like she got pregnant as a way to cope(?) with her mother's death. Then she went to a stillbirth support group and lots of the mothers shared that their own mothers helped them in their grieving process. I mean, it's like the universe is out to get her. The baby you had in order to get over your mother's death also dies, and then according to your support group, you're supposed to get help from your dead mother to cope with death of your baby. I'd give her at least the same amount of time she was pregnant for her to grieve the loss of her baby.
I do agree that it can come across a little self-absorbed. But on second thought, I think it's understandable. I once chatted with a lady who had a miscarriage. The experience really is very isolating, even her husband didn't understand her feelings.
It would be nice if she undertook a project or a charity fundraiser to commemorate her mother and baby. Or even just go on a trip abroad like in the old days. A change in scenery would do her good. I'm sure her mother and baby would like her to be happy.
It looks like she got pregnant as a way to cope(?) with her mother's death. Then she went to a stillbirth support group and lots of the mothers shared that their own mothers helped them in their grieving process. I mean, it's like the universe is out to get her. The baby you had in order to get over your mother's death also dies, and then according to your support group, you're supposed to get help from your dead mother to cope with death of your baby. I'd give her at least the same amount of time she was pregnant for her to grieve the loss of her baby.
I do agree that it can come across a little self-absorbed. But on second thought, I think it's understandable. I once chatted with a lady who had a miscarriage. The experience really is very isolating, even her husband didn't understand her feelings.
I didn't mean to jump on your comment negate what you said open door. I get what you mean. When Eva feels bad, she really goes down in a hole. And she easily falls into feeling bad. Remember the time when all her ig stories were about her being sad and upset? I think being easily upset and dwelling on it (clinical definition of "neuroticism") is part of her personality basically. It would be nice for her to find people who can help her change bad mental habits.
And now she's suffered from a double tragedy. Considering the extraordinary circumstance, i give her behavior a pass. But she really needs help with her underlying mental habits.
Also possibly preemptive couple's therapy?
And now she's suffered from a double tragedy. Considering the extraordinary circumstance, i give her behavior a pass. But she really needs help with her underlying mental habits.
Also possibly preemptive couple's therapy?
Last edited:
I can’t imagine losing my mother and then my baby in such a short space of time. I feel for her so much, and hope she can find ways to get through. It seems like she is trying so hard to live with the grief.
I don’t think she is being self absorbed at all. I think she’s completely bereft. Not that I’m saying there is anything wrong with grieving a miscarriage either just to be clear , but we aren’t talking early miscarriage here we are talking being pretty much at her due date and her baby dies. And her mum had died not that much before too and she’s still processing that loss.
Everyone copes with grief and managing/ living with their mental health differently. She’s trying to establish a routine, had attended some grief sessions and work out what life is for them now. Also as for their financials we don’t know what that is at all. Depending on where she works if she was working, stillbirth can mean you are entitled to maternity leave / pay - so she could be off work because of that or she could be on an extended absence we don’t know their circumstances.
Key maternity rights following a stillbirth
Employees have the right to 52 weeks maternity leave, with the right to return to the same job.
Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) and Maternity Allowance (MA) are paid for 39 weeks to women who meet the qualifying conditions.
I think it’s totally understandable if she isn’t working at all though. We don’t know what Alen’s situation is either. For all we know they have enough funds they don’t need to work.
Everyone copes with grief and managing/ living with their mental health differently. She’s trying to establish a routine, had attended some grief sessions and work out what life is for them now. Also as for their financials we don’t know what that is at all. Depending on where she works if she was working, stillbirth can mean you are entitled to maternity leave / pay - so she could be off work because of that or she could be on an extended absence we don’t know their circumstances.
Key maternity rights following a stillbirth
Employees have the right to 52 weeks maternity leave, with the right to return to the same job.
Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) and Maternity Allowance (MA) are paid for 39 weeks to women who meet the qualifying conditions.
I think it’s totally understandable if she isn’t working at all though. We don’t know what Alen’s situation is either. For all we know they have enough funds they don’t need to work.
Last edited:
I find her posting about it questionable. Her social media accounts, her rules, but cameras have a way of making people come off as fake and begging for attention. She would come off as more sincerely sad if she took time off from social media and privately dealt with her loss. Plus, we all know that social media isn't good for mental health.
I think she is genuinely grieving but she isn't helping herself with some of her choices.
I think she is genuinely grieving but she isn't helping herself with some of her choices.
I feel Eva presents as getting worse. Six months in, she is obviously barely functioning and in high levels of distress, which is depressing to watch. I find it a little disturbing that she frequently refers to Olive as a living presence, ascribing thoughts, actions, personality traits to her when, sadly, she never lived, so it is all a fiction. The grasping on to 'messages' from Olive is, I guess a common reaction for many people in grief but her explanation for the number of the nail polish being a message from Olive was a real stretch. I feel it makes Eva a real soft touch for exploitation.
I feel like she’s in danger of being exploited by charlatan clairvoyants or something.
This exactly what I mean.
I think they should have had a burial instead of a party.
I can’t imagine all the grief and it feels so mean to say it but like you said before - even her instagram stories get disturbing, looking so desperately for signs from them and assigning them so much meaning. I still think she is not getting any better 
(
(
I feel so bad for her, its hard to see someone clearly struggling and so publicly. I too find some of the stuff she writes quite disturbing and worrying. I hope she's getting good therapy and has lots of support from family and friends.
Eva's instagram stories are really concerning to me too. I know someone said earlier in this thread that she's entitled to a year of leave, but I can't help but feel that going back to work would be helpful for her. It might take her mind off things instead of spending all day wallowing in grief.
I am glad many of you have noticed what I have thought for a while now. It makes me quite uncomfortable and while I know what she gone through the past few years is quite traumatic she does seem to be completely consumed by grief to the point she doesn't seem to want to get out of it. I agree that doing normal life stuff (like work) does take your mind off of it, but I can imagine sitting at home in the flat and looking at Olive's room and things all the time is probably not going to help.