Years ago my bf was a comedian and he told me that there was soooo much stuff on this guy, if it all came out people would be very shocked. At first I was, like no way you are just hearing that from people jealous of his fame, but then I heard a story from someone not in that comedy scene, so it kind of confirmed it.
There are a lot of real narcissistic creeps in the Irish comedy scene who treat girls/lads terribly and laugh about it like its some perk of their job. Met a few through the bf and some of the stuff that came out last summer about a certain comedian actually didn't surprise me. I won't name names but some Scottish comedian actually did a set specifically about knowing his rape victim.
I think, personal hot take here, that there is a pervasive mentality in Ireland to not believe a woman when she says she was attacked. Its bred into us, women have been silenced since the founding of the state. A few of those mother and baby homes reports recently had details of girls raped while in industrial schools and getting pregnant from it and the reason they were admitted to the laundries was 'SHAME'.
The girls bore the brunt of took the blame, like they were at fault for their rape and ensuing pregnancy and don't forget here alot of these girls got pregnant at ages like 15. But no it was their fault, the man is a good man, decent guy, from a good family..
This attitude still exists, its inherited trauma bred into all of us, and people seem to default to thinking the girl is lying, or making it up or agreed then changed her mind after. And look I'm guilty of having thoughts like that cross my mind when hearing stories years ago. And when I got raped myself I didn't tell many friends for years because I knew some would sympathise in person and then go home and say well I must have been asking for it... I only confided in a friend who also had been assaulted. As I knew she'd immediately believe me and not question how I let it happen (a question I did get asked by someone!!)
I do believe victims coming out and talking these days , it took me 5 years to process what happened to me and be able to move forward from it. Some people are faster to recover, others take decades, and especially if you are a child when this happens it can really take a long time for your brain to catch up to the trauma you suffered and be able to correctly label it.
Anyways back on topic, I definitely think Irish society still minimises the female voice, previous well known rape trials know that the default discourse is 'sure she asked for it, or she shouldn't have been wearing a skirt or a thong' or 'she must have led him on, he's a decent guy didn't the priest speak up for him at trial'
Even with the family annihilator murders in Ireland recently, the men murdering their wife and kids then themselves, it's always 'oh he was a good man, pillar of the community, did loads for the locality' the victims of his crime, particularly his wife, silenced again. Honestly I think this country is entirely polluted still by the effect of the Catholic Church, a real Mary magdalene is a bleep mentality..
As you can tell this boils my piss
Wow really well written and I agree with all the points you made and it actually makes me sad and more needs to be done we need change in this country and fast
