EmmyLou Loves #89 The return of Hoochylou, mumma's hips don't lie but her scales sure do

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Great minds @Michy02 - I just created a thread too (I've asked for it to be deleted).

There is a lot to unpack (DKNY baby pink matching suitcases and Amy's shitshow life) in the past week.

Coming back from nearly 2.5 weeks away from her 3 kids under 12 and old Limpdick no-balls is still looking after the kids like she hasn't even been away.

She has not brushed her hair since Vegas, she's probably just had a quick swipe of the micellar on her jaxxy and she is fresh as a daisy and ready to take on The World Port Melbourne on her daily walks.

SMM and Neds have both missed her so much, especially Brad. It's like she's been gone for years.

Can I just add that the barbie pink nails really go with her grotty dark brown Nike sweatshirt.

Over to our friends for a proper recap.
 
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Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…

Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

8928568F-284F-4DCC-A1E6-BB529218D482.jpeg
 
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Brilliant @#Super Cute 👏👏👏👏

I'm not sure if Red Rock Deli plants or the picture you have included with Treasure cat or the TEMU ad for black and pink bike shorts (bum-hole shorts) is my favourite. 😂
 
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O
Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…


Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

View attachment 2217835
Oh this? Sheer, unbridled, stone cold farking amazing brilliance.
 
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This
Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…


Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

View attachment 2217835
This is farkin’ brilliant 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 👏🏻 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
 
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Thank you @Michy02 for the new thread.


Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…


Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

View attachment 2217835
I can't stop laughing. This is brilliant! The photo is so detailed and covers every in joke.
 
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Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…

Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

View attachment 2217835
I didn't know Pantygate had a name. How funny. My "merican" friends sure got a kick out of it.
 
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Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…


Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

View attachment 2217835
The recrap we didn’t know we needed but the recrap we deserved thank you @#Super Cute ❤😂
 
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Thanks for stopping mid-coddling and creating the new thread @Michy02 😻

Now for a Recrap of Thread #88
My Mum went on a dicke chasing trip to Vegas and all I got was this crappy tshirt.


Location: Loose Vagus USofA 🇺🇸
We put our Krusty Kinis, Vida’s shorts and “sweet baby girl” voice on and buckled in to Daddy Babe’s Camry for a road trip to Red Rock Deli!! Slappin our own ass in excitement at seeing where literal and actual Red Rock Deli chips grow, We were very disappointed to not find any chip plants. Very confusing and misleading #ad #adstandards 😏

Time to bid the Babes 🧢of USA 🇺🇸 goodbye with a farken layover in fricken Santa Monica. Oh mah gawd!! We headed straight to the historic food halls and farmers markets 🥨🥯🌯 [Get in mah belly!!] and saw a bewdiful farken swanky AF fountain, OUR best friend Charlotte’s store and some other tit n stuff on the way. Food glorious farken food!! Mumma was livin the farken Merican dream!!

Location: United Airlines dunny 🚽✈
Face masks and fanny wipes in the airplane loo and a farken bewdiful welcome home with hot air balloons too!! Sahhhh prity for Port Melbourne’s favourite daughter 👧🏻

Location: The Hovel, Port Melbourne 🇦🇺
And just like that…..in a hawt minute we were back with our nearest and dearest - the Mitsubishi, crossbody bag collection, fresh oxtail, Braaaaddddd and cookin up a storm in The Hovel. Showering is optional y’all ✌🏽

Supervised access with The Children on ALove’s weekend to give them their crappy presents then this hometown hero took the farken dogs for a walk cos farken bloat from flyin n spendin 2 weeks in the farken hawt dessert an mah tummy tuck swellin. Prayers and Sorrows for mah waistband 🙏

Dear Diary -
Fark me ALove never changed the batteries in me scales at the end of daylight savings so they told me I put on 4 farken kay gees on mah peen holiday!! I literally and metaphorically only ate salad a dark meat 🍆 I made bewdiful memories so who farken cares…imma just go an have a farken steamin hot bowl of sumthin….or a bagel….crossiant…


Mumma is hungrier than her arse in her favourite pink gbanger!!

……10kg chicken wings, 2 ‘small’ bowls of sugar free ice cream and a cuppla steamin hot bowls of oxtail slop later, Mumma slapped her own ass and curled up on the sadza stained couch and played a game of Candy Crush.

Gewwwdddd mornin happy farken Sundy from Naaaaadsss Cafe!! Got meself a latte but no coin for those pesky kids waitin in the Mitsubishi. Fark no! Mumma gots to hustle now!

[Meanwhile “Codegate” threatened to send Fezzas into a civil war to rival “Pantygate” started by our Merican fren @Buttercup123 many threads ago but thanks to the distraction of Emmy’s cankles in her Jordans and @Limpy Love getting castrated in the Chaddy underground carpark, we popped on some Kanye and hip hopped back into our Sunday Snark Sesh]

Monday’s hot tip was how to “coddle” your milk to make buttermilk for your pancakes…🤷‍♀️

The pollen count appeared high in Port Melbourne this weekend and the Fezza Meteorologists in residence predict this will rise mid week as Mumma tries to survive on her version of intermittent fasting (eat 16 hours:fast 8 hours) and climax 😳 on Friday as Babe 3.0 posts stories of romantic day trips to Walmart in his dad’s Camry with his newest peen puller 🍆 fresh off the tarmac from Bulleen Heights 🥨🧢

“Aunty Bubs is in da farken house!!!”

View attachment 2217835
“Peen puller” …dead! 👏
 
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And whoever asked in the previous thread about the buttermilk substitute - it is curdle not coddle. She is truly illiterate.
 
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And whoever asked in the previous thread about the buttermilk substitute - it is curdle not coddle. She is truly illiterate.
And she "published" a cookbook duck me dead. Perhaps I can run for American President.......
Seems the LIONESS is due a litter anytime now 😆😆
 
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That jersey dress is stretched within an inch of its life... can clearly see her light coloured bra underneath 🤦‍♀️

And as for the prancing in those heels? 🙄
 
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And of course she hasnt unpacked her 3 suitcases. Those clothes must stink.

Mumma is heading out to an event.
Screen_Recording_20230605_081620_Instagram_exported_39267~2.jpg
 
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Mumma’s got some new shoes!! I hope she has to sit down somewhere again, in that dress that is way too tight and way too short 🤞🏻
 
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