Do I want it? No. Do I need it? No. Save it! #3

[Silverback]

I was scammed out of thousands of pounds this week by a trader. I am utterly distraught. Please don’t ever make the same mistake I did and ask their hourly rate before they start work and get a quote.

Prior to that I was in spendy mode. Was looking at insta too much and thinking I ‘needed’ new summer dresses and bits from the white company. Now I feel awfully guilty.

The events of this week have made me and my husband reevaluate our situation. We are thinking of moving house in order to release some cash and make our lives easier. This house seems riddled with problems and while there are good things about it we are thinking about moving to a cheaper area to lower our bills and release more cash back into our savings.

I’ve done a lot of cosmetic work on this house so it’s a shame. I completely made over both front and back gardens and recently painted the front door and put a gorgeous door knocker on it. This scam situation has made me reevaluate our situation though. We are a few thousand in debt and it really stresses me out. We can’t ever afford to go on holiday.

I just feel sick to my stomach right now.

 

[adviseplz]

Here’s your reminder to cut your seemingly empty products in half before putting them in the bin. I seem to be getting another week out of my moisturiser, I was convinced it was completely empty!

 

[whoareyouu]

I love this thread. I’m more of a lurker but I really do love reading all of the advice.

 

[Bread]

I have unsubscribed from alerts from companies.

Sales used to be a big deal but they're so regular now that I feel offended if I buy anything at full price!

 

[50degreesnorth]

I think some people are just the “life above all else” types - hence those poor bloody mutts on wheels.

An old friend once told me there are two types of people in the world; the type who picks up the phone and books the appointment and the type who stick their fingers in their ears singing “La La can’t hear you”.

Having my old boy PTS next week, that’ll be the best part of £220 (reasonable Vet fees thank goodness).

I’m not sure I’ll replace at this point. I grew up in a world where people gave away puppies free to good homes. Nearly died of shock when I saw the prices of puppies now - and rescues aren’t interested because I have children/cat/fences lower than 12’ and no moat/dog’s own room/wfh/no hobbies”.

 

[Jellycat369]

Have managed to save £375 this month despite being the first month of my lower mat pay. So far this year we've managed to save £1,445 which I'm quite pleased with.

We've also managed to clear £5,500 off of our credit cards so they're at a zero balance. Admittedly we did have to use money from our high interest savings to cover half of that.

We'd asked a friend to provide us with a quote to do some work in our garden as we never had the time to get things done. Fortunately we managed to smash through a bunch of tasks last weekend, even managing to enlist the threenager to help with some bits. We're not quite finished yet but it feels good to have managed ourselves and saved some money in the process.

I've been sorting out stuff to sell so need to make time to get that sorted. I also want to make time to create a spreadsheet to track our spending to see if there are any other areas where we can reduce things.

At the beginning of the year we had reserved a new house and started the process to sell our current house. Unfortunately we were told by the mortgage broker that we wouldn't be able to borrow the money we needed for the house, they couldn't even lend us enough to cover our existing borrowing! We had to pull out of the house purchase and lost nearly a grand in the process. Today we spoke to a mortgage broker and we can now borrow more than enough to purchase the house we're interested in and the payments are still affordable despite having to pay more nursery fees come January. Such a result! Going to keep smashing money in our savings and hopefully have even more ready for when we move

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Are you living on it or still investing?

Living on it. enough to manage but not a lot spare - partly my own fault and the monthly regular vet fees for 3 dogs and 2 cats is ridiculous, I shouldn't have so many animals, but I have and I love them so they stay.

 

[Curiouscupcake]

Welcome to our third thread! This thread has been merged with the low/no spend thread so there’s a huge community of us now.

The premise is to be mindful and intentional with our spending, particularly discretionary spending!

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

I think some people are just the “life above all else” types - hence those poor bloody mutts on wheels.

An old friend once told me there are two types of people in the world; the type who picks up the phone and books the appointment and the type who stick their fingers in their ears singing “La La can’t hear you”.

Having my old boy PTS next week, that’ll be the best part of £220 (reasonable Vet fees thank goodness).

I’m not sure I’ll replace at this point. I grew up in a world where people gave away puppies free to good homes. Nearly died of shock when I saw the prices of puppies now - and rescues aren’t interested because I have children/cat/fences lower than 12’ and no moat/dog’s own room/wfh/no hobbies”.

So sorry you are losing your poor old boy - it never gets easier, no matter how often you go through it, and even when you know it's the right thing to do (for their sake, not yours).

British rescues seem to have two settings - ridiculously demanding, as you say "What!? No 12' fence, and someone isn't at home 23 hours a day, and you aren't all non-smokers and you don't have access to woodland/ beaches for 3 x 4 hour walks a day!" and the ones that apparently say "Of course you can take this 2 year old American XL bully that has already had seven homes, has killed neighbouring dogs and cats and has come to us because the police have confiscated him from his latest drug-dealer owner. He'll be totally fine with your toddler twins and their eight year old sister who wants to dress him as Barbie."

People don't give away puppies now. They give them a stupid name and advertise them at top dollar for a "chance to own this unique oldenglishcockerbulldoberhound puppy - rare breed!"

It's shameful that nowadays, when we have the ability to limit the number of puppies our dog has by human means, there are more dogs being bred (and dumped) than ever before.

I get very angry about all of the above. Very angry indeed.

 

[allaboutthegossip]

I didn’t realise places were starting to charge refund fees, that would put me off!

 

[really_whythough]

It's such a shame that so many young people are pushed into going to University when there are so many opportunities in trades.

Yep! Anyone who is smart enough to learn and put into practice traditional building and restoration methods, especially insulation that won’t wreck your house with damp, is going to absolutely clean up in any area of the country.

I wish that Stacey Solomon ‘Renovation Rescue’ program was half focused on naming and shaming and suing the people who left them in the lurch in the first place. It’s just far too easy to get away with poor work and frankly criminal behaviour.

 

[Trauma Frotters]

I feel absolutely passionately that pet ownership should not be the privilege of the financially able. My family background is as poor as poor can be but yet absolutely full of animal lovers, pets and lives enrichened by the human animal bond, including solo living elders who would have not opened the curtains in the morning without the life affirming companionship of their dog. "Give a Dog A Bone" is a charity working in this field who I support.

I made my first ever mortgage overpayment. A small enough amount but it feels good. I am now working on finding the balance between feeding my own savings and overpaying the mortgage. We live quite frugally which is fine but I worry that we may scrimp and save away our lives diligently and then something terrible happens to one of us and the survivor is left regretting not living a little more together instead of overpaying the mortgage/having a full savings account. That sounds very dramatic but my family does not make old bones and I can be a bit too disciplined and get stuck in a self denial loop (five years since our last holiday for example and we have had some very heavy emotional stuff to deal with leaving us drained but a holiday just feels unobtainable)

Anyway, I am a long way off that being an actual problem as I am still making small unneccesary purchases - a full set of L'oreal bond repair hair products last week. I need to get back into using what I have first. I also bought a new dog clicker despite knowing I own three as I can't find any of them. Too much clutter and some poor decisions!

 

[really_whythough]

I was scammed out of thousands of pounds this week by a trader. I am utterly distraught. Please don’t ever make the same mistake I did and ask their hourly rate before they start work and get a quote.

Prior to that I was in spendy mode. Was looking at insta too much and thinking I ‘needed’ new summer dresses and bits from the white company. Now I feel awfully guilty.

The events of this week have made me and my husband reevaluate our situation. We are thinking of moving house in order to release some cash and make our lives easier. This house seems riddled with problems and while there are good things about it we are thinking about moving to a cheaper area to lower our bills and release more cash back into our savings.

I’ve done a lot of cosmetic work on this house so it’s a shame. I completely made over both front and back gardens and recently painted the front door and put a gorgeous door knocker on it. This scam situation has made me reevaluate our situation though. We are a few thousand in debt and it really stresses me out. We can’t ever afford to go on holiday.

I just feel sick to my stomach right now.

I’m so so sorry that has happened to you, sadly it’s extremely common. Please don’t blame yourselves.

The consumer protection act is there to make sure you have some pushback against people like this.

We are taking TWO incompetent builders to the small claims court for thousands of pounds each.

I’d really encourage you to speak to citizens advice (call them early in the morning - I’ve always gotten through then). Explain clearly what has happened.

It sounds like the issue might be that you were massively overcharged? Maybe because a price wasn’t agreed first?

I can’t remember the exact wording but the cost of work must be fair and reasonable, they can’t just take advantage you as you didn’t agree first.

For one of our cases, he overcharged (we thought we were paying for reliability and skill - ha! Not so much…) and CA told us to get 2 other quotes (not easy once the work is done but you’ll probably have an easier time, ours was a massive job). Then you can take them to court for the difference.

We’ve done a lot of learning and speaking to solicitors (for free, they all say do small claims as it can get silly expensive unless you have legal cover - maybe you do?!) and many of them say if it does go to court, usually if you are the ‘good guy’ you’ll win, then it’s a case of making them pay.

Anyway, if you’d rather just put it behind you that’s totally understandable. At least they’ve buggered off and you’ve learnt your lesson! That’s worth something.

This country is absolutely broken when it comes to trades. Where we are it’s at least 90% crap, narcissistic cowboys. I wish I was exaggerating.

 

[Bread]

Any of you lovelies know of any car insurance deals?

Thank you

I did the four major comparison sites and then got my current insurer to match the lowest offer! Worth looking at Go compare I think as they offer £250 excess cover (so they'll pay up to £250 for your excess) and this meant I could have a higher excess which brought my costs down.

Well done on the closing the window 50degreesnorth! That takes strength though I'm sorry to hear about the earring. I'm sure it will turn up, these things always do.

I've had a bit of a panicky day which suddenly sparked a Spend. Nothing massive, but bits add up and it was just like I stopped caring. I get 'paid' on Friday (I've left my job and I pay myself a monthly salary, but I do dip into my money in between ) and I suppose I'm thinking well I'll pay it off then... But I feel ill about it. Swim cap, swim shoes, flip flops, toothpaste, a dress I liked which had gone down more than 50% off to £15, walking sandals... I hope to have a new job starting next month, but I feel very ashamed of myself and not sure what to do about it. I may ask my parents if they'd like to give me the shoes for my birthday. I feel very out of control, so I'm going to sit down and go through everything I've spent, everything I have left and do some calculations. I was so frightened by this settlement coming to me and me having money that I couldn't breathe because I was scared I'd screw it up and now I am, I suppose.

 

[50degreesnorth]

@Bread A £15 dress is really not worth the self-flagellation - enjoy the heatwave. As for the swimming stuff - exactly how expensive WAS this swimming cap? I’ve a suspicion it was made of rubber, not platinum. It’s not like you’ve blown ALL your cash on a sports car. You’ve spent realistically a very tiny amount of money for things which will likely last years. I have one pair of swim boots I bought I don’t know how many years ago - not something I upgrade annually. Flip-flops - can’t cost the Earth etc etc. unless they’re bloody Chanel, in which case get thine arse to Primark!

I’ve just had my last bill of this calendar month go out and was feeling twitchy around Sephora (the date I need new make-up is approximately 17th Never 2079)… so I bought a premium bond instead.

Checked the results from last month quickly - some lucky fucker won £50k from £300. It’s been there over 20 years. Probably bought for a grandchild and forgotten about.

 

[Darvos]

Living on it. enough to manage but not a lot spare - partly my own fault and the monthly regular vet fees for 3 dogs and 2 cats is ridiculous, I shouldn't have so many animals, but I have and I love them so they stay.

I feel for you @TheMiceInTheShed. Pet costs are up there with energy prices when it comes to goalpost-moving of past budgeting (like working out what you need to live on with a pension).
We lost our old dog earlier this year and it’s not just that awful heartbreak that everyone who loses an animal they love goes through that is stopping us from getting another. I feel so angry inside that a few companies are cynically hoovering up the UK veterinary industry, right to the pet crematorium stage, and the prices for treatment and routine care are shooting off the scale, with pet insurance premiums responding accordingly.
Responsible animal lovers are feeling it and there are terrible animal welfare repercussions with those less responsible.
Apart from a couple of aquariums the only animal we currently have is a 15 yr old cat, whose insurance is a few pence off
£50 a month. I am open to another cat, or a bonded pair, as I can’t imagine being without one, but in my heart my home should be a amiable pile-in of animals who need a home, and I just will not do that. Poorer in pocket or poorer in heart isn’t a choice I’m enjoying making but I feel so taken advantage of by the big vet companies.

 

[rainbowlemon]

I've had a bit of a panicky day which suddenly sparked a Spend. Nothing massive, but bits add up and it was just like I stopped caring. I get 'paid' on Friday (I've left my job and I pay myself a monthly salary, but I do dip into my money in between ) and I suppose I'm thinking well I'll pay it off then... But I feel ill about it. Swim cap, swim shoes, flip flops, toothpaste, a dress I liked which had gone down more than 50% off to £15, walking sandals... I hope to have a new job starting next month, but I feel very ashamed of myself and not sure what to do about it. I may ask my parents if they'd like to give me the shoes for my birthday. I feel very out of control, so I'm going to sit down and go through everything I've spent, everything I have left and do some calculations. I was so frightened by this settlement coming to me and me having money that I couldn't breathe because I was scared I'd screw it up and now I am, I suppose.

Try to be kind to yourself. Everyone makes financial mistakes, and it's important to learn from them rather than dwelling on guilt or shame.

It's okay to ask for support from your parents or someone you trust. If you feel comfortable, you can discuss your situation with them and see if they can help you with birthday gifts or other support.

Reflect on your recent purchases and categorize them as needs or wants.

 

[50degreesnorth]

I got kinda suckered yesterday. Quidco sent me an “extra cashback” for buying something electrical on eBay. Before I knew it there’s a ninja air fryer on its way. In my defence, the current one is in pieces as the children have been using it for basketball practice I assume and I could only turn it on using pliers.

Cheap eats right now. Rhubarb is growing like the weed it is - crumble crumble anyone? And one of the chickens keeps giving us double yolkers.

 

[Bread]

I had the same thing with rescues in the UK. I adopted from Romania and am so, so, so thankful the UK rescues all simply ignored me as I adore my little boy. It was soul destroying at the time though, I wanted a dog so badly yet rescue homes wouldn't even respond to me.

I'm very sorry you are saying goodbye to your dear chap. I hope you enjoy your last days with him x

 

[Notworthy]

I’m so so sorry that has happened to you, sadly it’s extremely common. Please don’t blame yourselves.

The consumer protection act is there to make sure you have some pushback against people like this.

We are taking TWO incompetent builders to the small claims court for thousands of pounds each.

I’d really encourage you to speak to citizens advice (call them early in the morning - I’ve always gotten through then). Explain clearly what has happened.

It sounds like the issue might be that you were massively overcharged? Maybe because a price wasn’t agreed first?

I can’t remember the exact wording but the cost of work must be fair and reasonable, they can’t just take advantage you as you didn’t agree first.

For one of our cases, he overcharged (we thought we were paying for reliability and skill - ha! Not so much…) and CA told us to get 2 other quotes (not easy once the work is done but you’ll probably have an easier time, ours was a massive job). Then you can take them to court for the difference.

We’ve done a lot of learning and speaking to solicitors (for free, they all say do small claims as it can get silly expensive unless you have legal cover - maybe you do?!) and many of them say if it does go to court, usually if you are the ‘good guy’ you’ll win, then it’s a case of making them pay.

Anyway, if you’d rather just put it behind you that’s totally understandable. At least they’ve buggered off and you’ve learnt your lesson! That’s worth something.

This country is absolutely broken when it comes to trades. Where we are it’s at least 90% crap, narcissistic cowboys. I wish I was exaggerating.

It's such a shame that so many young people are pushed into going to University when there are so many opportunities in trades.