Dating after lockdown #30 WHY ARE MEN SO BORING

[Thank(space)you]

Previous thread here:

Dating after lockdown #29 Dating advice from June (87) "Don't"

I’m in the bubble bath with a G&T and a good book. @triesherbest & @LaBlonde I wish I could give you both a big hug. It infuriates me that dating is such a frustrating process and I absolutely despise the worth society attaches to marital status and such. There are so many lovely people on...

tattle.life

Congrats to @sleepflowers for the thread title suggestion

If anyone wants to recap, feel free

 

[TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo]

One evening on a dating site has cemented what I thought, that dating isn't for me at the moment. One lovely man was irritated with me because I hadn't replied to his first message within two minutes. Nope!

I encountered the ubiquitous 'man holding fish', a dodgy Darren and several references to wanking in the profile sections. What a night, what a journey .

 

[Universal]

I’m just getting ready for my date today. He’s booked a table so we are going for lunch.

 

[Hot_Dogs_Or_Toes]

reads thread to try and learn how not to be a boring man...

 

[melisnusty]

New to this thread and very new to dating after 25 year marriage ended. I was reading here and joined Facebook dating now after 5 mins I’ve freaked myself out. On the back of this and because I am dramatic, I feel like I will die alone.

 

[Tangent Tiger]

New to this thread and very new to dating after 25 year marriage ended. I was reading here and joined Facebook dating now after 5 mins I’ve freaked myself out. On the back of this and because I am dramatic, I feel like I will die alone.

Take it easy!

I'm new to it after a few years of celibacy and am already tutting at him as he messaged at 2am after I'd fallen asleep. I messaged back when I woke up.

Now I feel like: where are you?? as I haven't had a response!

Luckily I would just raise an eyebrow if he ghosted me but it's a mental readjustment after years!

Is there anyone that you like?

 

[Clementine]

Can @MsCurly do one of her fabulous recaps please?

My date last night went well - we got on and I felt comfortable in his company. Only lasted 4 hours though because getting home is a bloody nightmare where I live after a certain time. He’s hotter than I originally thought, isn’t a fan of Andrew Tate and asked to kiss me. Am so old and deaf though so our second date will have to be somewhere quieter 🧏‍ and not in an Irish pub with live music

 

[EddyDarling]

I've redownloaded tinder.

I've matched with so many really fit blokes 🥲
My F1 love is being appreciated finally
My bumble is going nuts
The opposite to Hinge

 

[Usagisakura90]

I re downloaded tinder and bumble last night, 1 match so far lol but I've swiped on lots of women.

The amount though that are coming up looking for a man, makes me wonder how LGBTQ+ friendly these apps really are and if I'm just swiping on straight women and also the amount of actual men that are coming up in the swipes.

 

[melisnusty]

Take it easy!

I'm new to it after a few years of celibacy and am already tutting at him as he messaged at 2am after I'd fallen asleep. I messaged back when I woke up.

Now I feel like: where are you?? as I haven't had a response!

Luckily I would just raise an eyebrow if he ghosted me but it's a mental readjustment after years!

Is there anyone that you like?

I think I’m a wrong ‘un because I read their crappy bios and just think oh do duck off.
I don’t know what I’m looking for so it’s not their fault.

 

[EddyDarling]

I re downloaded tinder and bumble last night, 1 match so far lol but I've swiped on lots of women.

The amount though that are coming up looking for a man, makes me wonder how LGBTQ+ friendly these apps really are and if I'm just swiping on straight women and also the amount of actual men that are coming up in the swipes.

I have LOADS of straight women pop up on mine.
It even says "straight" in their profile?!
I don't think they are LGBTQ+ friendly at all.
Horrific amounts of couples as well. Bumble gets rid of them tbf when I've reported but it's still annoying.
And still very much shows that bisexual women are seen as sex toys even in 2023

 

[Tangent Tiger]

I think I’m a wrong ‘un because I read their crappy bios and just think oh do duck off.
I don’t know what I’m looking for so it’s not their fault.

It's not you at all, you're allowed to 'filter' and you're not used to it. It's taking tentative steps.

Sorry I should have said I was taking the Puss out of myself a bit as new bloke is in a different country (but nearby) and it's silly I was expecting a response within a time frame

 

[Clementine]

Some food for thought.

 

[Rayne]

A reminder to all the men on bumble

 

[Usagisakura90]

I have LOADS of straight women pop up on mine.
It even says "straight" in their profile?!
I don't think they are LGBTQ+ friendly at all.
Horrific amounts of couples as well. Bumble gets rid of them tbf when I've reported but it's still annoying.
And still very much shows that bisexual women are seen as sex toys even in 2023

Yeh I see alot of couples too or women looking for someone to have on the side of their husbands/partners. Like sorry no I'm not dating you whilst you go off and shag your man living the married life, I'm not going to be shared either.

Like you say, speople seem to think bi women are toys.

Maybe I should change it to lesbian maybe that would filter more. Saying that I have run out of swipes lol. I did try LGBTQ+ dating apps but there was alot of women there wanting to experiment or they were too butch for my tastes.

Is this what men experience when women don't swipe on them this still doesn't explain why there are so many butthurt men I'm not even angry.

 

[melisnusty]

It's not you at all, you're allowed to 'filter' and you're not used to it. It's taking tentative steps.

Sorry I should have said I was taking the Puss out of myself a bit as new bloke is in a different country (but nearby) and it's silly I was expecting a response within a time frame

I think I’ve been married for so long that internet dating wasn’t even a thing back then!
I’m struggling with how to pitch it. So much nuance is lost in messages.

 

[tomato_paste]

Downloaded bumble again and 15 minutes in I'm already annoyed with it. So many men that just... don't put anything on their profile

 

[LaBlonde]

Downloaded bumble again and 15 minutes in I'm already annoyed with it. So many men that just... don't put anything on their profile

and so many men where it’s impossible to judge what they actually look like!! drives me mad. how am i meant to start a conversation with you?!

oh and also:

 

[Usagisakura90]

and so many men where it’s impossible to judge what they actually look like!! drives me mad. how am i meant to start a conversation with you?!

oh and also:

View attachment 2248822

They are always the shortest weirdest looking ones too, maybe they think we will see past it if their mates are fit

 

[LaBlonde]

They are always the shortest weirdest looking ones too, maybe they think we will see past it if their mates are fit

i messaged a guy who matched with me the other week like “thanks, but despite you having seven photos on your profile i literally do NOT know what you look like”

he unmatched and i will never know if it was a loss or not (probably not).

it’s the ones who just upload a seemingly random photo from their camera roll too! like, your dog is cute and that ocean view is pretty but, sir, this is a DATING PROFILE.