Could you marry someone poor/minimum wage?

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Jellybean093

Please don’t back track on what you say. You think someone earning £25k isn’t enough and if it was a fella, you wouldn’t look twice at him.
 
Reactions: 7

Blair-Waldorf

This thread is fucking hilarious. Money truly brings out the worst in people. Makes them talk absolute shite
 
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Cheapseats

Sorry should have said wrote to his creditors not debtors. Noone owed us money haha we owed them.

Debt free now
 
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Kim Mild

latranla said:
As in range was my second car and now I drive the a Porsche ! The range was my first luxury car was the point I’m trying to make and even though I miss the Toyota I would fine it really hard going back to a basic brand !
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Have you ever considered that a lot of the basic brand cars may be company cars that someone gets as part of their high paying job?
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They also don't choose their salary.
 
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Lazarus

My partner earns less than 30k in a (fairly high profile) job he loves. We have long haul holidays once a year and 2 European city breaks every year. He is currently having a suit tailor made; it will hang in his wardrobe alongside the other 4 tailor made suits.
our house is filled with books, music, nice furniture and most importantly, happiness.
We don’t drive, don’t have any debt, love our jobs even though they aren’t massively well paid. We own our house and have a very small mortgage. I’m sorry your bias makes you think that people on a certain income only go to certain holiday destinations or shop in Primark. Perhaps you need to get out of your social bubble.
ETA: your original question is about marrying someone ‘poor’. I already feel richer than you, purely due to my mindset. Poor isn’t only about money and possessions, or lack thereof.
 
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Neo2021

Serious question for the OP.

Say you were single and on a first date, would you ask for their salary upfront? Because 99% of men would run a mile if you did.
Or how long would you be committed to dating until you found out his salary? Say it was a year down the line and you were in love, what would you do?
 
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littlewonder

the world isn’t divided neatly into poor = no work ethic and rich = successful and ambitious… that’s about as useful as saying ‘get a better paying job’

I’d like to have enough money to live comfortably, have my own house and not worry about working. I’d probably volunteer on a casual basis and explore my hobbies and interests or just fuck off abroad now and then. I hate money talk and find it really unattractive though because of my previous abusive relationship - I’m much more interested in who me and my partner are and how we grow as people! I was earning a perfectly fine amount before I had a breakdown then I worked my way back to a decent wage… and then I got ill and now our household income is tiny. We manage and I wouldn’t trade my partner for anyone. I can’t imagine the pressure of a partner who only cared about the number on my payslip and not my health and well-being!

My last ex was obsessed with money and status and it made me obsessed too - it was miserable!! He couldn’t stick to a job because he thought he was too good for minimum wage - he got himself into debt and then started stealing my money because he was never happy with what he had, it was always about what he could get next.

Having a breakdown/illness makes you realise a lot of things and whilst I’d love to earn more and take the pressure off my health, I’m not about to work myself into being permanently bed bound for the sake of a nicer car because I won’t get to enjoy it
 
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emm

So then even when you earned less it was an issue? This sounds more like the type of men you are choosing imo
 
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aidil

A low wage doesn’t equate to zero ambition

Not everyone works in an industry that values their qualifications, hard work and skills.
 
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bluefootedbooby

So for me, in an ideal world I'd find somebody who earns around the same as me so we can have the same lifestyle.

That being said, if they were low paid but loved their job etc, then I'd also find that an admiring quality. Overall as long as they could pay their way themselves, ie doesn't live at home still in their 30s, then that would be enough for me.

Oh and I'm also in the higher wage bracket, and I drive a 12yo Ford Fiesta - the shame apparently I've never been a car person, as long as it drives well, is clean and has aircon, it'll do for me. I'll run mine into the ground before getting a new car.
 
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littlewonder

my standards are as long as I don’t have to de-ice the inside of my car in the winter, I’m winning
 
Reactions: 19

Snippysnips

Black.bird said:
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When a friend's mother passed, it turned out she had heaps of money in the bank, yet lived very frugally and often went without. It's mind boggling. Everything in moderation.

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This was my dad's side, you would never have known how much they were worth by how they lived, they had a nice 3 bed house, a small car an never went anywhere for holidays really apart from some small little day trips on buses an they were incredibly happy, turns out they had saved all their life an were living without spending money because they had wanted to put most into trust funds for us 4 grandkids (my great aunt also done this) an when the time come that they passed we didn't know just how much they had been putting away into inheritances for my dad an his brother an us 4 grandkids, they had all come from wealthy backrounds from having been from land owner family's an STILL worked hard to save money, an I feel as if this is why my dad also lives quite frugal when he has good money because he's been brought up being taught to put it all into savings

I honestly hope that people don't think that all with money are stuck up their own arse as someone who was in the performing and dance world an at stageschools (many friends went onto film an TV) I was always surrounded by kids who's parents had good money, but aside from the odd one who had a brat, they were all really nice an most of us kids actually had to earn our own money if we wanted somthing so they could teach us the value of money an what it was like to work for something, even though many of them could have bought whatever without even batting an eye
 
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shadowcat5

Rippedjeanmaybe said:
i feel like the people actually missing out are the ones who’ve never experienced a maga holiday
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I've never experienced a maga holiday. I genuinely went to malta for my girls holiday... Am I high brow enough yet?
(I don't drink though so maga would have been pointless)
 
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Snippysnips

Black.bird said:
A person's job does not define them.

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That would worry me as in they were saving for a rainy day, retirement, or whatever, but what if that day never came? We never know what's around the corner for us, and you can't take it with you.
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Honestly I think it was his upbringing that done it because his family were like this, I will say he's relaxed a bit more now, we did talk about why keep saving like this an not enjoy ANYTHING, sometimes you need balance, it's good to have savings but also you need to live a little bit, because like you say it can't go with you, an we have enjoyed many Walt Disney/Universal holidays now (our choice as we love it there) an my 2yo neice (the first grandkid for him) gets some nice family days out
 
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MagpieTree

I work an office job, Mon-Fri 9-5, £26k. I was previously a supervisor in my current department but my mental health couldn't cope with it so I stepped back down. I am so much happier now and have no ambitions to step back up. My job allows me to clock off at 5 and enjoy my life without worry or stress. I could earn another £3-4k if I chose but my happiness is more important.

My wife worked in a supermarket when we first got together, then switched to working in a care home just before Covid struck. She worked relentlessly through the pandemic, despite hating every moment of it. Last year she'd had enough and we agreed she would hand in her notice, without having a job to go to. Her mental health was more important to us, even though we knew that we would struggle a lot without her income. Luckily she got a job fairly quickly, she earns £20k and she is HAPPY! She occasionally has the choice of overtime, maybe one weekend a month, which she does and adds to our savings account.

Basically, we could both choose to go and find jobs that earn more but we are happy. We both finish at 5pm and can spend our evenings/weekends together. We don't want foreign holidays, prefer holidays in this country with our dogs. We both want the same in life.

I would rather be without someone that is happy in their life and wants to spend time with me, than someone who earns more but spends all their time working.
 
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Jellybean093

shadowcat5 said:
It is my worst nightmare. I'm sure the island is gorgeous and I'd go to the other areas but that part... no thank you
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I wouldn’t recommend
We stayed just outside and it was beautiful. The nightlife. Well. Wow. What can I say
 
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Rippedjeanmaybe

shadowcat5 said:
It is my worst nightmare. I'm sure the island is gorgeous and I'd go to the other areas but that part... no thank you
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I love Majorca. The beaches are amazing, the sea is so blue. I went to Palma last year which is just up from Magaluf and it was a great holiday.

To be honest I went to Maga out of season and it wasn’t bad at all. Quite clean, nice beaches, didn’t see any drunks to be fair. Although this was 2012 and October time! It’s definitely not like they make it out to be
 
Reactions: 3
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