Cleaning with Mario #78 Rats in the attic, snakes oan the app, a bespoke bedsit full of crap

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Why would anyone ever even post that photo? I took an anatomy course at university and have honestly seen healthier looking cadavers. So aye!
 
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Aww wee baldy Martin looks like a cartoon willy
 

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Mother of God can he not talk about anything but himself. I’ve swerved out of my lane and spent today in a&e with issues relating to my (real) chronic illnesses that I get PIP for (smell the £55 a week wealth) I didnt realise I now need to do a dots of doom insta story all about it. I actually just messaged my mum, my sister and kept husband up to date. No one else needed to know (or to get tae know) until I knew what was going on. I’m now home and awaiting an urgent referal for a CT scan but it doesn’t need to be on social media.
I have haunting visions of wee dirty racist deek prancing round the bed sit in nowt but orange timberlands, a shart card swinging from a sunflower lanyard and a fat spliff on his way to the bumming fort (whilst trying not to trip over 280 plastic pumpkins and a neon pepper) brain bleach please
 
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Aww ma lovely hope you are ok? But please get back I. Your lane there will no sympathy from Marion , “ye not the only one with a disability! “(Not ma quote ) no debates !
 
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Aww ma lovely hope you are ok? But please get back I. Your lane there will no sympathy from Marion , “ye not the only one with a disability! “(Not ma quote ) no debates !
sliding back into my lane clutching ma beak and tightening ma hoose coat. So aye and so forth.
 
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Sending you and hope all will be OK and you can continue to mop kick your way through this tough time.
Chanting you from the rooftops
 
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Dots of delusion...howling

As soon as he said "that's why I never go anywhere" it was beyond obvious he's been reading here again.

That and saying he never stories around family or friends because he finds it too embarrassing. No way any followers have randomly sent him so many messages asking why this is the case...he's definitely read it on here.

Wee fandan.
 
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Sending you and hope all will be OK and you can continue to mop kick your way through this tough time.
Chanting you from the rooftops
thanks! I will continue to spine bright in ma (candy cane) lane and I’ll be back marching down to castleveechi in my timberlands and Paddington bear puffa before you can say “quick Deek turn down the footy, I’ve just seen the Provident man on ma beapoke ring doorbell”
 
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Make sure to eat lots of beige food to build yourself back up more salt the better and use some bronzer (on your face only) if you are a bit pale - gives a real natural Orange sunkissed look
 
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trying to keep ma power and get through his stories but he doesn’t half waffle some shite! Interesting that when he starts talking about this supposed big event with business people he about pulls his hair oot would love to have him analysed by the folk from the bespoke programme Faking It on Quest, would be fascinating.
 
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The worst bit about it is he probs watched the dots of doom and thought it was of a good enough standard to post! Never mind 99,9% of it was pure gibberish !
 
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That’s us in full meltdown Mode now ma lovelies. He’s lost it
 
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Martin. 'I can't possibly film in front of Derk I'm so anxious, I've lost myself, I'm not me anymore'

271617 dots of doom later.

Martin 'Derk, Derk, what is it that I known for on the app?'

'inerflu um, er, enzaarrrr'

Shartin 'eeeeeeee, aye, yeah, I'm a influenzer and I need to own it. Fuck the anxiety'

What a silly, daft bitch!!!!
 
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All this drama, it’s nothing new! He’s said it all before and he’ll say it again, no doubt!

The bottom line is he’s a scheme rat. He’s had an opportunity to change his life. But his scheme mentality stopped him. He’d rather scrounge for his pip, work the least amount of hours than change his life.

That’s what blows my mind. Why would you not want to create a better life for yourself?
A life that you could be proud of.
 
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