Imagine the cheesy foot smell, after you've used it for a while, wafting out along with the chemical febreze smell. Eeewwww.
Don't they have central heating? Why is he always rugged up like the granny in Little Red Riding Hooood.
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Don't they have central heating? Why is he always rugged up like the granny in Little Red Riding Hooood.
I still call it a hoose coat EEK !!!
That woman is a total gobshite and the way she speaks in front of kids too
Does anyone remember Billy Connolly and theThe big slipper
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TURN YOUR bleeping TELLY DOWN!!!!!!
Has he robbed this plate from costa?! 
Been caught stealing AGAIN. Proper little kleptomaniac is our Mazza.
Edit - just remembered I bought my aunt & uncle a Costa hamper for Christmas (they go there every bleeping day without fail and even buy the baristas Christmas presents
) and I think saucers were included.
Just checked - no they weren't!
Edit - just remembered I bought my aunt & uncle a Costa hamper for Christmas (they go there every bleeping day without fail and even buy the baristas Christmas presents
) and I think saucers were included.Just checked - no they weren't!
Nah, you can buy them....
They actually sell them in Debenhams - I know someone who bought them in sale 
Wonder if he is declaring these extra earnings to the tax man.
They can have a great game of hide n seek in the grey Wanket when the new grey luxury carpets arrive........woo hoo Our Derek, coming ready or not!!!
And he can’t even get the most basic of things right like bye felicia “See yi later felicia“He genuinely wonders why no one will gift him anything other than wax melts and blankets? ITS BECAUSE YOU SWEAR LIKE A SAILOR AND ITS BAD FOR BUSINESS MELV, no free shark for you
Why does he never have any home stuff from Debenhams or show us things he has seen at work he likes? I find that a bit odd ....
“FACK YOOO”
Stay classy Melv
Stay classy Melv
If he’s getting such nasty messages, and he’s such a little prick, why doesn’t he post the message? Because Mario, I think your pants are on fire!! You got no message. You’ve been poking your big wonky nose into our thread 
He is such a fanny. He has really changed, he never used to get involved in all the drama but now he's noticed it gets him engagement and bleeping loves it when he can pull out the troll card
Can’t believe how much crap he’s actually got on his fablon wrapped worktops ...dont know why I’m surprised really his whole tiny flat is stuffed with cheap tat ....so aye !!!!!!
And I can't remember a time when he didn't just wipe around the stuff. Unless his proper cleaning isn't for the gram? Same with the vacuuming. He might give himself a fright when it's time to clear the place for the crapets coming up
This is now worrying me that I'm so in tune with Saint Saviour of Small Businesses (but only when they are gifting him something) and Healer of the Sick (just not Kikini's fake Mum).
C U next Tuesday Melvin, with his see ya later Felicia
Boo! well, that’s no fun is it?
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