Calling in sick

[LemonLife]

I actually find big companies are more compassionate about sick policies, partly because they have such a strict HR rules that manager cannot side track from that. It is usually the small fry companies that think they can blatantly ignore sick policies and benefits entitlement.

I worked for a huge American company (think mouse) and our sick policy was HORRIFIC!

 

[Welsh1]

I remember working for a care provider once whilst I was pregnant, I'd had 2 days of non stop sickness and called in sick as I couldn't possibly provide a level of care while throwing up. I was told 'well we really need you to cover these calls'. I refused, within 3 hours they were ringing me asking me to work a night shift. I completely understand its difficult to cover calls but be realistic! I think that if you never really call in sick then you shouldn't be made to feel guilty or fearful of calling in sick. I'd be more concerned if I was sick quite often. Everyone gets ill. I only really call in sick if I physically cannot get out of bed or my head or bottom has been on or down the toilet quite alot

 

[ClockworkDolly]

I wasn't sure if I should post this in "Off topic" or "Advice" Does anyone else hate calling in sick to work? My first ever job (I worked there for 10 years) the two managers were absolutely vile about anyone that called in sick. They'd try to force people to come in, they'd slate you to other people and they would make you call mid afternoon to say if you'd be back the following day. I no longer work there but feel like this has had an impact on me. I always feel like my managers won't believe me, that they'll think I'm faking it etc. I'm currently off sick but instead of resting I'm worrying about what they're thinking. I very rarely call in sick, often going in when I probably should have called in sick.
Just wondering if anyone else ever feels this way? Any tips for changing my mindset? They've never said anything to me to make me think they don't believe me but I just keep thinking that I don't know what they're saying in their office.

I used to hate making that phone call, especially if it was a genuine reason. At my last job they knew I suffer with migraines, so actually were understanding about my reasons for calling in sick, plus I never got paid if I didn’t work, so it was always genuine.

But, from experience, if you’re calling because you fancy a few days off, just make the call a quick one. When you start rambling and listing all of your ailments, that’s when most people would smell a rat.

For a bad cold, I would shove a bit of pepper up my nose before making the call, so that I would sound as though I had been sneezing and if I sneezed during the call, even better!

One time, I was so desperate for some time off work, I ate some laxative chocolate and well, I will let your imagination take over from there. They sent me home from London in a taxi. It was bliss.

I fractured my wrist on my way to work once (slipped on ice walking to the bus stop) and I knew I’d have to have it x-rayed. I rang my manager once I knew she’d be in the office, explained by saying I may not make it in today (I worked for the NHS in admin) and she was like ‘well can you update me afterwards?’ so of course I said yes. Anyway, I go to A&E and I’m waiting for my x-Ray and my manager turns up looking for me!!! Really couldn’t believe it. The lack of trust was astounding.

You can’t do a lot with a broken wrist.

I broke mine 18 months ago, so know how inconvenient it is.

I got signed off work after I had a mental breakdown. I was asked by my employers to go to the doctors to get signed off as I was coming to work an absolute mess every day due to depression and anxiety. I was on a monthly sick note from the doctors which I posted in to HR. I was extremely unwell and checked in with my manager sporadically when she would just say she was thinking of me and said to just ask if I needed anything. A few months into my sick leave I got a new manager, I was gutted. This new manager rang me every Monday to “check in”. She would ring every week and ask if my depression had gone and if I had stopped being anxious. I bit my tongue and would just say no and wait for her to end the call. Some weeks I wouldn’t answer my phone as clearly stated in my sick note I was off work ill. She text me saying if I didn’t answer every week she would discipline me. I tried to return to work as she was pressuring me to and threatening to have me sacked. I was there a couple of weeks and had had to leave or not made it in as I was still very unwell. She pulled me into a glass see through office that the whole floor could see into. Shouting at me it wasn’t acceptable and I should be better by now. I got signed off straight away again that day. I ended up getting paid out of my job by the company. Another time that manager also said Glandular Fever wasn’t real so shouldn’t be off work. I was just unhealthy and should drink more water. She once left her computer unlocked with an email open (I sat next to her) The email was all just her slagging me off, about all sorts. Not just being ill. I’ve never worked since. The anxiety of having to deal with managers makes me feel sick.

These Managers are the worst kind and Britain is full of them. They’re usually stuck so far up their own arse, whilst brown-nosing someone else’s.

I wish we could ship them all off to a remote island somewhere and let their inflated egos take over. They are the pits.

 

[Countrybumpkingirl]

Ok I now feel incredibly lucky with my current company. I have had a nightmare in the year I've joined.. heart surgery, pericarditis, viral meningitis and then still not fully recovered. I have been paid throughout and then in November the decision was made to furlough me rather than keep stressing my body to actually let me fully recover. In reality I should be on SSP but that would put me on £95 a week which wouldn't even cover half my rent (I live alone) whereas I'm on 80% of my full salary. There is no pressure from them and they just want me to actually get better and return slowly rather than rush and end up getting worse again.
Reading other people's stories I appreciate my company 100x more.

I did also used to work in hospitality but we weren't ever allowed to work if sick. Maybe I have just been really lucky?

 

[MyLittlePony25]

I worked in a restaurant and they told you that you had to ring around to get cover or just go in. It’s so wrong when you are told you should stay away, especially working around food.

I worked in a college and my manager was so lovely but they would pester me to send in sick notes when I was sectioned in hospital and be checking in to see when I thought I would be able to go back. I was detained, I didn’t know! The team I worked with were incredible but the college would put so much on us and at least one person would cry every day. Many people would be off due to mental health. I ended up having to leave as I was constantly in and out of hospital. Calling in was a nightmare and I definitely think that it’s because it is engrained in us from being sent into school on our death beds. I always feel like a fraud.

 

[Countrybumpkingirl]

I've worked in places where it's a rule that you have to phone in personally (including one where my colleague was told she didn't sound sick and if she didn't turn up she'd get the sack - so she did, only to faint mid-morning and have to be carted off to hospital).

Maybe it's just me, but I've always felt that if I'm sick, it's best to actually go into work and show everyone so they don't accuse you of trying to skive off. It's hard to prove things like stomach cramps though. I work from home permanently now, but in this COVID world I wouldn't hesitate to stay home if I was symptomatic.

See it is strange my old work said if you are well enough to come in you are well enough to work. It really shows how different industries and managers work.

 

[Weaselwords]

I previously worked in retail and have been told to ‘come in and see if you can work, if not you can go home’. Recently, I had a chest infection (just before the first lockdown) and called in sick for the first time (I’d worked there for 2 years), I was made to feel so guilty by my manager, he made me drive in over an hour to get a laptop and on arrival I was told ‘you look awful.’ I hate calling in sick and often carry on working (making me feel more unwell) - if I ever become a manager I’d never want to make anyone feel that way!

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I remember when I worked in McDonald’s, my grandad became really unwell and I asked if I could go home as I wanted to see him in the hospital. My manager’s response? “Well you can go, but remember you’ll be letting the team down”. I didn’t go, luckily my grandad was okay though.

i remember once when I worked in retail, I pulled my neck and I was in a lot of pain and I couldn’t move my head, the management made a big song and dance about me going home even though I was in pain!

when I worked in a call centre, they luckily weren’t too fussed and I had a lot of time off sick because the job made me hate my life.

 

[Smallpotato]

Oh my gosh petty shit like this drives me mad.

My partner had to go into hospital with kidney stones years ago so it was up to me to call his employer (McDonald’s at the time) to tell them he wouldn't be in for a couple of days. All I remember at the time is that they tried to ask me to get him to call himself, I was like well no because he’s laid up in hospital with no signal you idiot, me calling up on his behalf should be good enough, and then I hung up on them.

I think even if you had died some work places would still expect you to call up yourself to confirm

I honestly sat there in the meeting shaking my head, I had been awake for 60hrs by Sunday searching for my BIL who was only discovered as he had a shitty tattoo on his arm as his face was a mess. I had to call my MIL, my husband was devastated... sure I called on the wrong day. STFU.

honestly the NHS is the worst. Way back when I was a HCSW, I was written up AGAIN to HR as in the period of 6 months my Nana died, I had a bowel perforation and then surgery. I was off 4 times. I was only 21, and my manager came to the meeting with me and tore strips off HR.

What do employers expect???

 

[jaymie]

At my last job, I had to leave early because my wisdom tooth had become infected. I went to work that morning though in pain, face swollen and unable to really focus on my job (I worked in clinical trials so I needed to concentrate really!). Anyway my manager let me go early as I managed to get an emergency dentist appointment - she was really understanding about it. Went back the next day and she called me into her office - asked if I’d actually been to the dentist, like why would I lie you saw the pain I was in yesterday. I got the antibiotics out of my handbag and showed her them as ‘proof’. I had to have the wisdom tooth taken out eventually and used 2 days a/l for it as I knew I’d feel rotten the day after the op.

Honestly every job I’ve had, I’ve been unfortunate with managers. I now work in academia (pgr researcher) and theyre a lot more flexible with sickness, family emergencies.

I actually find big companies are more compassionate about sick policies, partly because they have such a strict HR rules that manager cannot side track from that. It is usually the small fry companies that think they can blatantly ignore sick policies and benefits entitlement.

 

[CosmicCreepers]

I worked at a very well known fast fashion company- rhymes with Tribark ...every time I rang in sick I was completely hounded with questions and suspicions. I was always on time and took overtime whenever I could, I loved my job there and would never ring in sick just because I couldnt be bothered. In the end, I was luckily good acquaintances with my department manager and I could text her and she would pass it on. It was honestly awful at the beginning.

 

[WilmaHun]

My workplace allows a text to the office manager if we're poorly, which I am grateful for, I hate the thought of having to actually phone up - not sure why. I very rarely take sick days, I've had 1 day off in the 2 years I've been here. Despite that, if I did need to call in sick I know I would feel horrendously guilty for doing so. I'm not even sure why I feel that way, but I do.

For me I think it stems from childhood. I could have an arm missing and my mum would tell me I was going in and if the school thought I was poorly enough, they’d send me home.

This resonates with me so much. I've never realised it until reading your post, but I think this is why I feel guilty about calling in sick too! My Mum used to say the exact same thing to me! I guess it's just stuck!

 

[Babyyoda88]

I don’t begrudge any of my staff for calling in sick if it is entirely genuine, but the hours were given from head office sometimes mean that shifts are run literally to the wire and one person not coming in could mean the difference between being able to take a lunch break or not. I’m a retail manager and I’ve done double shifts (13+ hours) on no break because a staff member is hungover (or so I’ve seen on Instagram.. ) and I never get thanks for it from the staff member, the staff on shifts or my bosses. So I’m literally on both sides of this! I still come in to work with colds and there are times when maybe I shouldn’t have been at work to try and set a precedent that ‘the sniffles’ is not a valid excuse. That’s probably way harsh to a lot of people but that is unfortunately the culture in retail - everything is trimmed right down to the wire with budgets for hours etc!

well of course it works both ways. Those people who take the p!ss and stay off because they can’t be bothered or are hungover are something else and probably the reason why when most of us are genuinely sick and wouldn’t be able to work efficiently because of it, we feel really guilty.

Retail was savage I was part of the management team for a large company and it was expected that we would show up even if we were at deaths door! I did shifts full of flu, with stitches in my head, with a fresh tooth extraction, with ligament damage in my knee, with migraines that led to me cashing out the till in the dark...

I’m now a teacher and if we cannot be present, we text the admin team and someone emails/texts/rings us back to check we are okay! No expectations they just want to know how we are


This is true I sometimes did 16 hours no break but I would have never ever berated the staff for not turning in

I’m a teacher too, luckily work in very supportive school.

 

[Giggling Squid]

I know exactly what you mean! I used to work in hospitality and they would have wanted you in even if you were in a full body cast. I once had norovirus, the worst of which had been over my 2 days off but I still couldn’t keep anything down/inside so phoned to say I’m really sorry but I am too ill to work and worried I’ll pass it on to someone else. The landlady of the pub I worked at’s reply was ‘but *** hasn’t had a day off and he’ll have to stay on if you can’t come in’ I was like fine dragged myself in, somehow worked a 10 hour bar shift. The next day I got a phone call ‘can you come in (6 hours) early, ***** (the landlady) is really ill and can’t be on the pub floor’ I was so pissed off not only was I not allowed a day off sick, which would have been unpaid too! But I was having to go in early because she’d made me come in and obviously caught the virus off me, it was karma though too

Proper grim what goes on in hospitality. God knows how many other people I passed it on to pouring drinks and taking food out

I worked for a full 6 days with possibly swine flu... absolutely grim when you think about it. But the landlord and his partner were on holiday, so I was running front of house and didn’t feel like I had a choice at the time. Not even sure who I would have called in sick to, thinking about it

 

[kittypaws]

We could probably devote an entire thread to horrendous managers!

Now this would be fascinating; I've had some really bad experiences including a couple of managers (who didn't even manage me personally) be determined to get rid of me and make up shit about me. In the end they sort of succeeded in getting rid of me but I played them at their own game and resigned, refusing to work my notice which fucked them over. Some people are vile.

 

[Bitofthebubbly]

Can confirm retail/fast food is terrible for making you feel bad about taking time off sick. I used to work in a sandwich shop and had to take a day off for really bad period pains. So I call up the manager and explained, he asked me if I could take a paracetamol and come in anyway. I refused but felt like I was doing something wrong and it really didn’t help my pain which got worse when stressed.

I used to work in a supermarket too and you’d get the Spanish Inquisition in an interview when you returned. Return to work interviews were never pleasant, there was always the implication that you’d massively inconvenienced the whole work place by taking a day or two off no matter how sick you were, they’d demand doctors notes and all sorts even if it was just one day you were off. Obviously nobody has a doctors note after one day sick, it was so over the top. You got in less trouble at school for skiving.

 

[Giggling Squid]

I’m that person who turns up half dead... I’ve never taken an actual sick day in 8.5 years at the same company. I’ve been sent home because nobody wants me in the office, a couple of times but not willingly.

I get migraines but not badly, so for those days I save my boring monotonous admin and carry on working... dark room, screen brightness right down and I find it helps forget how much it hurts.

even if I’ve been sent home, I’ll still do my best to work from the sofa

 

[LittleMy]

Another time I was leaving my house to go to work in the morning and was in a bit of a hurry as my taxi was waiting. I lost my footing and fell down the steps at my front door and landed awkwardly on my foot. I jumped up in shock and somehow managed to get in the taxi (I think I was definitely in shock, the driver hadn’t seen me fall but he did comment that I looked chalk white, he made a joke about being hungover and I just sort of awkwardly laughed it off). I think I was in such a daze that I barely said anything, focusing too much on trying not to cry.

Anyway, I got to work (care home, half shift so 8pm-2pm). I stayed and worked my entire shift as I was so nervous about asking to go home, despite the fact that I was in extreme pain especially towards the end of it. My foot was so swollen I couldn’t get my shoe off. In the end I called my then partner at the time as my shift was finishing and told him. He picked me up and took me to the A&E straight after my shift. By this point he had to help me in because I was hobbling. I had tore the ligaments in my ankle and was signed off for 6 weeks but ended up going back after 4 because I couldn’t afford anymore time off. The SSP was just enough to cover my rent and nothing else. I still get pain in that foot to this day (worse in Winter) and that was 9 years ago.

It’s just the way they make you feel guilty to the point where you end up sacrificing your own health and well-being just to make up the numbers. I still feel guilty when I have to call in and I have the silent war in my head over it, but since Covid I wouldn’t hesitate. Your health should always come first.

8am-2pm, not 8pm-2pm. Fuck that!

 

[EyeSpy88]

I know what you mean! I feel guilty as hell calling in sick like they think I’m faking it! The job I’m in now they are ok about it not thrilled but wouldn’t make you feel guilty!
My first proper job between 18-22 I had keys (which I shouldn’t have had as was not management.. first job didn’t speak up for myself enough!) there were lots of sets but my manager felt the need to come to my house to get them anyway.. obviously to check up on me I literally came to the door wrapped in duvet after crawling out of bed but still felt like I was being ‘caught out’ that’s probably why I have a complex with it!
I think now it’s easier said than done but you know you’re ill and not just skiving so I wouldn’t worry just try and focus on feeling well xx

 

[jaymie]

I don’t know, I worked for a huge Japanese finance company here in the uk and well... I’ve already said how that played out

HAHA! Bless you I know is shit isn't. I am half SE Asian and used to live in Asia for many years. Different culture and totally not worth the stress and politics.

Hopefully you will be able to get out from your situation