Recap for you cow bags
*Every morning she questions why she’s so sweaty and asks if her followers think she’s pre-menopausal. Uh, it’s the long sleeved thick pyjamas under a massive duvet, with no fan or open window in July love. Stop jumping on any old bandwagon.
*Lots of wisdom and advice about the summer holidays and how you can cope with your kids and what you can do to entertain them. Scrapbooks, palming them off to grandparents and booking in “play dates” basically.
Bit rich really coming from Babs; who according to her spreadsheet detailing holidays, clubs, play dates and family days will have approximately 9 days on her own with her kids. And who also has local family support, no actual job/work to go to or do at home, and plenty of money to throw at keeping them occupied.
*Disney room for Ethan, ‘surprised’ him, he acted as though he was happy, and Babs got to spend loads of money and make a lovely amount of content out of it. Win win. Love how she claims she redecorated when all she did was put some stickers up and get some toys out, must have missed her becoming Kweeeen of interior design. For toddlers
*The room decoration led to a “oh my kids are getting older, all feel sorry for me” story, which was then conveniently followed by an AD
GoHenry bank cards for kids, Erin in the starring role with the worst scrunched nose smile ever to be seen. Poor kid, not her fault that her mother is a melt.
*Followed by another crappy rhyming reel, old footage with her sickly sweet voiceover, about how much the kids love HER and how SHE wants to be their number one, and how SHE feels about them growing up. Narcissist much?!?
Fake woe is me tears and Babettes telling her what an amazing a mum she is. Hmmmmm…..these oh so precious kids that she loves so much, but doesn’t want to spend time with when she can watch Netflix instead. If you think they’re growing up too quickly maybe actually enjoy them and don’t just use them for ADs/content.
*Ear plugs in and all alone while England won their semi final, history being made but Babs has no interest in enjoying it with her family, including the oh so precious kids that she can’t believe are growing up. She might not watch the final in case she’s a bad luck charm, because of course it’s all about her
*Loads of content, again, from doing a home dye job on her hair. It looks awful.
Followed by a
tit home hair cut a few days later. Of all the things she does that annoy me, not paying for a decent hair cut and treatment has to be high up there!
*Managed to find time to watch crap TV on a weekday morning before school, because that’s more important than spending time with the oh so precious kids who are growing up.
*Some absolute tosh about workmates picking people for their imaginary love island and how she was never picked but now she’s happy and body confident. Honestly there is no end to how active her imagination is when it comes to making up
crappy sob stories.
*Another crap reel, this one about taking a bra off from under her pyjama top
*Some (drunk at 7pm) chatter about the prawn cracker dance she used to do every Friday. People ask her about them (DO THEY THOUGH?!?) but they don’t have a take away on a Friday now, they have it on a Sat. And she always got comments from “cow bags” about how cringe she was, how just because she can dance doesn’t mean she should and how they didn’t want to see her do it.
HI BABS
She can only be referring to here
I mean, they were cringe, and she can’t dance, and she used inappropriate songs, and it’s really embarrassing for her oh so precious kids that she’s out in the world like that. So all fair points, but made on here, so she doesn’t have to read them, or take them to heart, or worry about them. Live like Elsa Babs and Let. It. Go.
Anyway we’re all cow bags so that’s good to know, and she’s going to bring back the dances to prove she doesn’t care what we think. Which is obvs why she directs 80% of her daily content at answering what’s said on here! The Babettes who don’t know about Tattle must be so confused, bless their little hearts.
*Saturday night saw the triumphant return of the cracker “dance” - actually not much movement involved, just a little shuffle as she just drew a red lipstick cross on her face, looked aggressive and smashed some prawn crackers with her head to the tune of Sweet Caroline, just like she did at Easter. Wow. Creative. And really sensitive to the issues of domestic violence increasing while football is on. So out of touch, as always.
*Sunday off, she’s managed two now!
*Returned Monday morning with smug and patronising pit stories about England losing in the final, except she didn’t actually mention the game, just pulled lots of irritating faces as she pretended to care when obviously she thinks such things are beneath her. Smug cow. At the very least she should have got involved to make memories with her oh so precious growing up too fast kids and encourage them to be part of something that will be mentioned for years to come. And she could also use her platform to discuss bigger issues like racism and domestic violence, but I guess that’s all a bit grown up for Babs, and doesn’t sit within her boundaries as people might actually, God Forbid, challenge her or disagree with her and she’d have to, you know, actually know what she was talking about. The horror.
*Grid post family selfie with her “quarterly” update on them all. Never seen that before but ok. No one actually cares, there was a massive event in the country and the fall out is ongoing, people are worrying about that; no one gives a
tit that Erin wants to watch Friends and Babs doesn’t know whether to hang washing out
The “sad things” said online (IE systemic and violent racism) may have affected you (IE you may be worried about your safety, your family, your children) and so she sends you lots of love (IE she’s vaguely acknowledged it without mentioning the actual issues and so can move on to more important topics like hair cuts and TV watching).
*Another reel - just her talking about all the old lady things she wants to do in the summer and shoving a magnum in her face. Which she made a point of aggressively saying is calorie free when it’s a prop “KAREN”. Guess that’s aimed at us as we discuss her massively unhealthy diet? Are we cow bags or Karens now?!?
*AD for ThinkTank, a place to visit in Birmingham. Kids took the starring roles, much better than her and wooden PUS, and it was nice that it’s a local place people can actually visit. But it’s aimed at younger kids and was blatantly filmed on her “day off”
*Some body confident bull
tit about being all the weights but only being happy when you love yourself. Blah blah bull bull crap crap.
*Getting content out of poor old Lucy, so we’re going to hear lots about how worried and emotional Babs is. Which I get, because I love my dog, but I also think she won’t handle well because, well, her track record…..she’ll overshare them moan when she gets comments, she won’t actually discuss grief/bereavement seriously, she’ll disappear and then pretend nothing happened.
*Outfits with belts and ugly shoes
and so much boring droning on about every day things that people barely care about in their own lives, never mind in the life of a stranger on the Internet. But she seems to have a need to post at least 25/30 stories a day, so drivel it is.
*She’s still a size 18. In EVERYTHING.
*Shes still gross in the morning, lazy in the day and drunk at night.
*She still needs some kind of help or intervention.
