Thank you!
Iām buzzing to have a thread title!
And to keep the Monday night excitement rolling Iāve got a recap for you all. So grab a big mug, fill it with Baileys, get under your manky blanky, ignore your kids and your jobs, and enjoy x
The last thread title said it all - where does PUS sleep? Leading to many questions....why have they moved to this house? Where will all the tat go? Did they really choose a house based on a cupboard with glass doors? WTF??
Someone had asked a question on a post about storage which Babs answered and signed off with āHope that helpsā. Basically just suggesting that anyone who asks questions is a pain in the arse, and needs to be spoken down to. How dare anyone question what an Instagram influencer does?!?
Babs didnāt help the Tattle thirst for answers on Tuesday with stories of PUS working at the dining table while sheās on the sofa. Is the office too small/crammed with boxes for them to work in it? Why is the person with a proper job having to work with everyone around him? Why is she such a child that she asked him if they could sit together? Has PUS actually got some balls to stand up to her as he apparently told her no? So many questions!
Our evening treat was an Ocado AD of the four of them enjoying party food. Classic Babs; a half hearted effort where she hadnāt even bothered taking half the food out of the packaging and where the story involved her shouting aggressively, like an over excited 5 year old.
Then a pic of her at a laptop with her āprofessional faceā. Thatās all about that was professional since the caption with it was grammatical nonsense.
Following that was a parade of Tuesday night excitement - a quiz night with a Baileys hot chocolate...think she neglected to post the pint of Baileys she drank separately by the state she ended up in.....and Babs being the champion at recognising Calvin Harris from a tiny part of his face somehow led to drunken posts of her fangirling over Calvin like a
twit. Then slagging off Ste because heād stopped replying to her, like when you ignore a drunk person because they make no sense I imagine. Then he was āsnoringā but clearly he wasnāt as they donāt sleep in the same bed. Her face in the accompanying selfie was the stuff of nightmares.
29 stories on Tuesday, most of them irrelevant, uninteresting and badly written, a couple drunk. How she gets companies to work with her is a mystery to me....clearly thereās a advertising intern somewhere who just looks at numbers of followers and engagement without bothering to check what the influencer actually posts!
Wednesday morning began around 6am with the Christmas film poll, which she did last year and the year before. Shall we say it again for the Babs at the back? Get some NEW content!
Then we were treated to a grid post and stories of her using her chins to tell us Itās Christmas.
No. No it isnāt.
Iām not a grinch, Iām really not, I love Christmas, and I realise this year of all years we need some cheer. However I disagree that Nov 11th is Christmas. To me, and many other tattlers, itās actually Remembrance Day, a day of reflection that people with a platform should encourage others to honour. Anyway the post was unflattering to say the least, but then arenāt all the photos and videos she shares these days?!? As it was pointed out by a Tattler, it seems completely pointless her putting a full face of make up on for Zoom meetings and ADs when anyone she meets in real life or online can check her page and see the faces she chooses to share!
Weād had 17 stories and a grid post by 9:20am on Weds. We find ourselves wondering what sheās going to talk about throughout December if sheās using up her Christmas poll content now. Valentineās? Easter? Summer plans?
They have a Christmas tree up but the room itās in is being decorated on Sun so the tree will come down and then go back up. Wow. There really is no planning involved in this shitshow at all, is there?
Tuesdayās Vlog was a house makeover, altho within a few seconds she said it wasnāt a make over as they havenāt actually done anything except move some furniture, that they possibly didnāt measure for before the moved in, around and make the house look small and cramped. Except for the furniture PUS canāt move alone because thereās no one to help him (Iām sure itās the bad back!) Babs shouted at the family a lot and made people even more confused about why they moved as both kids have lost desks, storage space etc. Someone even asked in the comments if theyāre regretting moving somewhere they canāt fit everything in and Babs replied that they love it even though itās a āPAINā not being able to fit. Honestly wondering if she drunkenly bought the house one evening without even seeing it
The girl doing dance lessons on Zoom means that Babs can sit in her pyjamas watching whatever she wants on telly. So thatāll make a change. Living ādat lockdown lifeā
Her boy made a piggy bank and she loves it. Iām sure they screamed and went rabid over it.
A picture of a manky blanky and a caption explaining love is ignoring each other on different sofas was all we got on Weds eve. Donāt get me wrong; she managed over 20 stories today, but it was all over quite early and the evening was quite quiet on the Brummy front.
Thursday began with her moaning that Elf always wins in the polls. My advice....Donāt put it in then, go crazy and mix up the content!
Hope that helps
Then some film votes and some scratchy pit stories about a red patch on her neck, going for a walk with a friend (Iām only doing the school run from now onā....Babnocchio circa Oct 30th 2020 when lockdown was about to begin) and how sheās starting to think about plans for her birthday.
Personally I am shooketh that Boris hasnāt conducted a press conference and issued new guidelines on how the Kweeeen of Brum should celebrate her birthday. Expecting an announcement from No 10 any day now telling us that on the day of our blessed Babsā birth we must ensure our Christmas lights are up, wear our pyjamas all day and be wrapped in manky blankys or dressing gowns. We must gather on doorsteps across the land to raise a massive mug of hot cock in the air and put our hands under our chins at all times. There will be a national meal of fajitas, with peppers as weāre fancy, and the only program allowed on ALL channels will be Real Housewives.
Honestly every family across the world must have had at least one birthday whilst in lockdown, what makes her turning 43 any kind of special event that must be worried about weeks in advance?!?
twit.
Daily Christmas mug and some chat about mugs, then moaning about Elf winning again. Honestly, no one cares Babs! Oh and she wore the same outfit for the second day and watched the Radfords, who have their own threads on Tattle for some of their questionable choices. So thatās good wholesome content to recommend
An eagle eyed Tattler found a video from a few years ago that Babs did with Toby Carvery, so it was professionally made, but there was a massive difference in Babs herself. What happened to that calm, able to speak at an appropriate level with no hand under her chin, affectionate mum? She used normal words! Where has it all gone wrong?!? I mean we know she fell into the success trap and gave up her normal life for this crazy internet existence, but how has she changed so much for the worse?
Thursday afternoon treated us to the Jude Law coming out of a lift story (if youāre an oldie youāll have heard it before, if youāre a newbie you will definitely hear it again) which was told through captions and close ups of teeth. Yeah Iām not sure why either.
She then spent āsome in the utility roomā. Again, answers on a postcard if you want to guess the word the Kween of incoherent sentences missed out this time
Fireplace is beginning to look festive - as in it looks like the display from a massive garden centre threw up over it. Clearly not a less is more fan is she?? So that will be all cluttered and gathering dust for roughly two months now. Would drive me mental, but hey, I can skip the stories and not look at it. Poor Conways who have to live there and actually want to be able to move around a room donāt have that luxury, so we here at Tattle send you our thoughts and prayers.
She told us that she likes to look at her things to make her happy (the incessant need for shopping, tat and clutter never wouldāve been enough to guess this) but when she told Stephen she imagines he heard blah blah blah. Yes indeed, Iām sure a lot of people only hear that from you!
Then they discussed how many times men poo at work. Wow. Iām riveted.
The photo that came with it was of her and PUS dressed up as Voldemort and Hagrid. Trolling Tattle much? What a sad little life she must lead, spending her time reading here and then posting things to wind up the ānasty trollsā. When in fact the majority of comments on here express concern for her. Yeah we take the mick and make jokes but no one wants to see her harmed or suffering; we also just donāt want to see close ups of her nostrils, teeth, her pit scratching and her fanning her foof every five minutes
We then had a boots in leaves with the dog out on a walk, followed by stories and a grid post about the little Christmas village sheās beginning to build. Just a mum. Writing annoying sentences. Pretending Ste is interested enough to buy things for her village. Putting more tat around her small house.
Then a late evening selfie coming back from a walk that was ānippy round the nipsā. Who wants to have the too much information chat with Babs?? Anyone??
Friday morning was a particularly gross start with rash scratching, ear picking and eye touching with the same hand. Lush
She also captioned the stories poorly, which is shocking considering how professional she is and how good she is at her job. She was lying in bed at 7:30 watching the kids choose own clothes for Children in Need so itās safe to assume PUS wasnāt at work and was in charge.
She told us weāre to be treated to a new poll this year (new?! New content?!? Itās like an early Christmas present!!) of āhunksā. Yes you heard me right. Cringey? Sexist? Inappropriate? Ticks all of Babsās favourite boxes!!
Todayās mug was a gift from a follower who she canāt remember
and we had a grid post of the kids wearing clothes. Another oh they used to be little but - newsflash - theyāve grown up post. Shocking. I had no idea kids grow up. I was shooketh and had to sit on the sofa with a hot cock for an hour to calm down.
We had an outfit of the day, a Christmas glasses on to watch festive adverts selfie, a Gary Barlow post and a chat about āsock juiceā. Theyāve never had carpets so she isnāt used to fluff from socks, which isnāt wet, so canāt be described as juice. Poor old PUS canāt do anything right, she really is not a fan of his at all
Friday evening we got the favourite Matalan pyjamas appreciation post- I stand corrected, it was actually before 5pm so technically still the afternoon, I was thrown by the pyjamas but forgot that Babs is in hers before a lot of us are even home from work. And she was (Just a woman) watching a program about a sex cult - I havenāt seen it but the description suggests probably not appropriate to be watching when there are kids around, but I forgot she happily banishes them away from her at 5pm so she can carry on with her choice of crap tv while most mums have to wait until the sounds of snoring fill the house before they put on their grown up shizzle.
Then a reel about PUS suggesting a chippy tea - good for him, he deserves a night off! Babs and her dressing gown were very excited, not sure why since it seems unlikely sheād have been cooking anyway!
Another beautiful Christmas scene shared pretending it was her house and PUS wrecked it, because of course he would seeing as she thinks heās such a disaster
Friday night was separate sofas and ignoring each other, again, and her texting him to ask for a cat.
Plus Lucy is really happy at the new house so perhaps weāve found the reason for the move - the dog
Saturday morning began at the crack of freaking dawn with a rough sounding Babs in the kitchen talking crap about hugging the kids and looking at glass candy canes. Then we were treated to her using said cane to attempt a Liberty X style dance - spoiler alert, she failed miserably. Then a scenic photo pretending itās her house, some ICED pain au chocolat (sacrilege), a festive mug and a pile of wallpaper on the floor.
Lucy watching the kids play hide and seek and bowls of soup were the highlights of Sat. The pics show how cramped the rooms are, so much furniture that doesnāt all fit!!
A reel of the kids doing āStep in to Christmasā a la Gavin and Stacey popped up, Babs of course got herself in there. We saw a red front door and a SMEG fridge, which sheād mentioned they might get and hey presto, there it is!
Saturday evening was yet another photo of PUS on a sofa under a blanket, like every other night this week
The curtains still donāt fit and still donāt look right.
Then a photo of her on the walk she went on (with bad looking skin) where they all named three things they like about each other - Babs has good style, gives good hugs and takes them nice places. But what do they love about PUS and the kids? Alas, we will never know because it is ALL about Babs!
Sunday morning and she was alone in the lounge (thus proving to Tattle that isnāt where PUS sleeps) at 6ish chattering on about boring crap. The boy is becoming a vegetarian which she of course made all about her being a vegetarian for a week in her teens to copy Mark Owen
Sheās arranging books because they still have boxes to unpack and she found her masters! Who knew?!? I was shooketh. Just a woman. Who has a masters. Who now canāt write a coherent sentence. Because. Sheās sold herself out. For a pay cheque.
AD for Studio reveals they have been gifted festive pjs, even tho she dedicated a morning of stories to how she canāt find any, and some other decorations that already seem to have been moved off her trees. Landfill, glorious landfill for the ever wasteful Babs!
New vlog - first Christmas one of 2020. Lucky for us we have such a martyr in Babs, willing to put her decorations up for us and set up a hot chocolate stand. What would we do without her?? Thank goodness shops are open in this lockdown for essentials such as candy canes. More chat about calories not counting at Christmas that being her claims at being confident crashing down, not that we should be surprised as she is one big car crash lately!
Sexual candles on Sunday morning
Decorating on Sunday afternoon - dark colours to choose from (wonāt look good I wouldnāt think) and a new set of shelves. Personally I like them (I know, shooketh) but they donāt go with anything else in the room. She has a LOT of bottles of booze for someone who claims not to drink much. And she had a lit up E, it was mentioned on Tattle that it seemed unfair for PUS not to have a letter. Lo and behold, within the hour, she was on the internet ordering one
She might as well tag Tattle in there!
7:30pm and she was making a Baileys hot chocolate and watching The Crown. How you might ask? Is she not a busy relatable mum? Has she not got kids to sort, lunches to half make, jobs to do? No my friends, she has The Help for all of that. PUS coming into his own, obviously divide and conquer theses days doesnāt mean a kid each but him doing everything while she sits in the manky blanky on her own.
A photo of her with Gi Fletcher and some other instamums to say good luck for Iām A Celeb. She wonāt watch it until tomorrow as the kids would get cross with her because they love it, even tho itās on at 9 which is post watershed for a reason!
We then got an odd collage of pics with a spiel about how sheās been mixing it up lately, sheās so happy in āthis homeā and hopes we all see that and sheās going to keep up the slightly mundane family life.
Sorry what?!? Mixing it up? Sheās literally posted a mug every morning and a photo of Ste under a blanket every night! She doesnāt seem happy, sheās always doing a close up selfie moaning about something. Last week she was grinding her teeth and waking up at 3am! And the mundane family life is pretty much her whole thing - BrummyMummy?! Cos sheās a mummy?!? So that one was really confusing.
Monday morning began around 6ish again with news of going for a smear - hoorah for a good use of her platform, she may actually encourage someone to have one
Then a jumpsuit sheās going to buy because ladbabymum had one and an Amazon wish list of books for her girl. More buying, more awake all hours shopping, more terrible sleep habits.
And then a mug. Obvs.
She wore pleather leggings to the smear test
and laughed with the nurse about shaving. Hadnāt shaved for weeks, since the last time she left the house for the dentist āweeks agoā.
All well and good telling little stories like that, except when you document EVERY thought and action on Instagram we know itās all crap. Dentist was 11 days ago, not weeks, and Babs has been for a walk with a friend, to an NT place and for at least two dog walks since then
Babnocchio you need to realise that just because a story vanishes after 24 hours doesnāt mean everyone forgets it ever happened!
We then had a delightful treat with some stories of Emma opening boxes where she couldnāt remember what sheād ordered. FFS love read the room - you are living through the second lockdown of this pandemic where millions of people have found themselves, through no fault of their own, struggling financially. Just the last couple of days weāve had Ā£399 shelves, a light up letter, a wish list of books, a Ā£45 jumpsuit, a Ā£1500 fridge.....now youāre opening a Christmas pudding jug and a Mickey Mouse head thatās bigger than you thought?!? What is wrong with you??? I get that some people arenāt affected by Covid financially and I get Instagrammers think we all care what they have. But you could take it down a notch. We donāt need to see every single thing and hear about every online shop you do. It doesnāt inspire people, more likely it makes them feel crappy or it fills them with rage that youāre so greedy and wasteful. Even the Christmas mug a day is showing off how many mugs she can afford to have
We got a dining room makeover post next, leading to some questions about choosing low chairs and a rug under the table. Also annoying to have a fridge in there that you can see from the lounge. Can see what look sheās going for but as ever sheās falling short of planning/organising it enough to actually make it work!
Then the affiliate links started. Making her furniture choices seem more obvious if she got them free/discounted/can earn money from people copying
She went to the supermarket to get special vegetarian food for the boy, then did a crotch photo with smear test info
Why, Babs, why??
Sorry the recap is long but she posts a lot. And Iām just a mum. Spending too much time on Tattle because itās my guilty pleasure of amusement
Hope that helps
(she has finished issues! 
Brilliant spot 