I'm following this thread as I have struggled with binge eating throughout my early twenties, especially as a student, using takeaway and junk food to deal with my feelings.
I am conscious that this is a bad habit, however during lockdown, I have simply lost the motivation to even try and control my binges. I have moved back with family at the moment, and when I do a food shop I will pick up specific binge foods to snack on later, I will then put all evidence wrappers etc in a bag and take it out to a public bin so all very secretive, not sure if anyone else here does the same?
I'm very overweight at the minute and this is due to my binge eating tendancies, I will have 'good days' of eating and then if I have a sweet thing I will see this as ruined and will binge later on.
I will keep following this thread as I'm interested to hear coping mechanisms, definitely the longer I go without a binge the more likely I am to carry on.
I think during lockdown it has been especially easy to over eat.
I also suffer with this and have done for years.
It can be very mentally draining just thinking about food constantly. It's also not well publicised, almost unheard of I would imagine to others. Its an eating disorder and there is help out there. I found myself feeling utterly awful after binging, not so much ashamed but I would feel so lethargic. I ended up doing a lot of research about calorie deficits etc and I actually haven't binged in 6 weeks now. I feel like I just got to a point where I decided to choose myself rather than choose food. I feel so much better with so much more energy. For me it was a case of, I could either let it consume me and possibly end up killing me one day or I could fight the battle against it.
As for your comment 'he will realise how big I actually am', he is your husband, he sees you every day, he sees what you look like & I'm sure he loves you just the way you are. Reach out to him, you'll feel better.
What you've said about deciding to choose yourself over food, is such a powerful statement and one which has actually really made me feel inspired, thank you