Bethany Rutter

[ShadieSadie]

Lol but of course she follows her skinny pic with an 'omg I just love eating loads of fried chicken' post.

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Sorry but her biggest olive ever last night is more plus size than her. (But maybe equally green in that outfit!)

I actually worry that people who follow her, buy her books, listen to her and relate to her being large but going running, having a husband, great wardrobe, cool social life, all the stuff women are told you cannot have if you are large are not only feeling gaslit, but those who have eating disorders, mental health issues around body image and felt a solidarity in her unapologetic self may be really spiralling.

She didn’t just lose weight and contextualise it. She lost so much weight so fast a few people here wondered if she was ok eating disorder wise but then now its so much so fast, either she does the Insta bite of all that food ordered for shots or she’s using some kind of help.Whether it’s Ozempic or getting diagnosed with ADHD and the impact of meds, she cannot large is all the amazing stuff she did and then make no reference to so much weight loss except constantly posting numbers about her classes, step count etc.

Stats were one of the good changes bopo and large acceptance brought in. Don’t comparable data when you don’t show all the workings out and when you don’t know know what way people feel. And don’t ask them to buy another bloody book about large but fit gal and yer pal takes on the world. The audacity.

I had an eating disorder and it’s starting to be uncomfortable for me and I never looked up to her in that way. It’s like a friend letting you pick up the bill when they leave their job only to find they actually got a big pay off…

 

[GiftedNotFree]

Dear Bert

 

[Blahblah93]

It's just so hilarious because of how she used to react when ANYBODY would show they were a "good large" i.e. showing healthy eating and exercise. If it wasn't her I wouldn't give a tit if anybody had lost weight but she's made her entire career out of calling out others for what she's become.

 

[Margi989]

Saw her last week and looked like a 12 or 14. I'm a 10 and she was close to me and didn't look much bigger

I saw her last week in central and she does not look a sizd 20. Guessing a 12/14. I'm a 10 and she was definitely not much bigger than me.

 

[controlledrage]

She used to basically gang up and bully anyone in the large community who dared to lose weight, that’s the only reason I’m pissed off with her silence surrounding it.

 

[MissHavisham]

It's just so hilarious because of how she used to react when ANYBODY would show they were a "good large" i.e. showing healthy eating and exercise. If it wasn't her I wouldn't give a tit if anybody had lost weight but she's made her entire career out of calling out others for what she's become.

exactly this
---

She used to basically gang up and bully anyone in the large community who dared to lose weight, that’s the only reason I’m pissed off with her silence surrounding it.

and this

 

[Lurkeryaar]

If anyone fancies a rhyming title for thread number 2...I throw out

Bethany Rutter #2: Expert spinner, out for dinner, getting thinner

 

[ShadieSadie]

She used to basically gang up and bully anyone in the large community who dared to lose weight, that’s the only reason I’m pissed off with her silence surrounding it.

She went OFF on a friend of mine who was really close to her for losing weight after starting more exercise. The friend was about the size Bethany is now actually and apparently there had been some tension that she did not ‘support’ large bodies by getting bigger. We aren’t friends anymore but she was really upset that as someone more pear shaped and the ‘largest’ of the people Bert knew who wore non plus sizes she was ‘picked out’ to be a bopo follower. Basically ‘babes, you’re on the cusp so less of a project.’

Friend was having a lot of pain and possibly had fibro. So took up exercise (under advice) and turned out she had cancer. Had to have her lymph nodes removed in one arm, chemo, radiotherapy and a bunch of steroid treatments and went up from a UK14 to 20 and Bethany told her your body knows the size it wants to be. I saw that text. She may have meant it like ‘don’t diet right now, keep healing’ not ‘got ya large pal!’ but it landed as well as you’d expect to a woman in her mid 20s with cancer.

I was not there for the claim she said maybe exercise caused it and no one who was someone I’d trust outside the Old Bailey and a Bible but at the same time it wasn’t the only claim I heard about her ‘you don’t owe anyone health’ and some very weird views about health and chronic illness and weight.

 

[imjustlooking]

Sorry but her biggest olive ever last night is more plus size than her. (But maybe equally green in that outfit!)

I actually worry that people who follow her, buy her books, listen to her and relate to her being large but going running, having a husband, great wardrobe, cool social life, all the stuff women are told you cannot have if you are large are not only feeling gaslit, but those who have eating disorders, mental health issues around body image and felt a solidarity in her unapologetic self may be really spiralling.

She didn’t just lose weight and contextualise it. She lost so much weight so fast a few people here wondered if she was ok eating disorder wise but then now its so much so fast, either she does the Insta bite of all that food ordered for shots or she’s using some kind of help.Whether it’s Ozempic or getting diagnosed with ADHD and the impact of meds, she cannot large is all the amazing stuff she did and then make no reference to so much weight loss except constantly posting numbers about her classes, step count etc.

Stats were one of the good changes bopo and large acceptance brought in. Don’t comparable data when you don’t show all the workings out and when you don’t know know what way people feel. And don’t ask them to buy another bloody book about large but fit gal and yer pal takes on the world. The audacity.

I had an eating disorder and it’s starting to be uncomfortable for me and I never looked up to her in that way. It’s like a friend letting you pick up the bill when they leave their job only to find they actually got a big pay off…

I’m being witchy here but I don’t think she’s as big an advocate as she has seemed in the past - just say something ! People would respect you so much more if you said something - she’s not as famous as her but Rebel Wilson say - she was just honest and I don’t think I’ve seen * that * much back lash. Just know your audience, say how incredibly lucky you are to also not work a 9-5, can seemingly eat all this food just cos of exercise AND look aesthetically and culturally pleasing AND that you still advocate for large people but alas are not large anymore. Sorry I’m spitballing, I’m part jealous part angry

 

[Margi989]

It does seem very fake to constantly show junk food when clearly she must be eating healthier to lose that much weight. No amount of exercise can negate a poor quality diet

 

[ShadieSadie]

I’m being witchy here but I don’t think she’s as big an advocate as she has seemed in the past - just say something ! People would respect you so much more if you said something - she’s not as famous as her but Rebel Wilson say - she was just honest and I don’t think I’ve seen * that * much back lash. Just know your audience, say how incredibly lucky you are to also not work a 9-5, can seemingly eat all this food just cos of exercise AND look aesthetically and culturally pleasing AND that you still advocate for large people but alas are not large anymore. Sorry I’m spitballing, I’m part jealous part angry

The only pushback I saw on Rebel Wilson was the types who have made ‘large famous people’ their icons no different to stans who blur a line of love and obsession any of those groups who get nicknames. Collective stalkers living through Lizzo or Harry Styles or TSwift. The Rebel rebels freaked when she rebelled. She spoke up that her weight was partly binge eating and needed treatment, she was unwell generally, wanted a kid and all the aspects in the cycle of her weight: binge, jealousy, insecurity, mean girling, over confidence pushback were keeping her single and inauthentic. She wanted to change and drum roll please like all eating disorders: weight and food area symptom of underlying behaviours and beliefs. Treatments aims to change symptoms by changing those.

And then she came out and ooooh the anger she seemed happy by changing. For herself. I don’t much care for Rebel Wilson but they attack Adele for wanting to be more active for her kid, keep working, not deal with weight impacting personal goals but are also salty that Adele, Lizzo, Rebel have glam lives with money etc so how dare they want more? Maybe because fancy lunches and posh clothes aren’t all that compared to health and privilege?

But to flaunt weight loss and her non stop luxury life and acknowledge neither is audacity. She posts that reel about another woman exercising while large (and used a large black women’s words) instead of ever being a writing and writing about this dilemma. It’s not a easy write and I now think she may not be acknowledging it because her skills haven’t grown beyond early influencer show don’t tell…

Also disclosure, I am just so livid today that she reposted the Grenfell slide in amongst her lunchy lunchy, spin, oh holibobs tomorrow, large activism slide in such a performative way. Her London and her reality is so shallow. Even Carrie Bradshaw raised the odd issue head on!

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

But to flaunt weight loss and her non stop luxury life and acknowledge neither is audacity.

She did a really good job back in the day at concealing how much of a generational wealth girly she was? When she was constantly upset/complaining about her tit medical (??) copy writing job and tit boyfriends and tit landlords/renters rights she seemed just like any of us early 20s in the early 2010s girlies trying to make things work, but that’s been abandoned and now we’ve got to readjust for the fact she is just a rich girl that doesn’t need to work? And probably will have absolutely nothing interesting to say to us again.

 

[TrolleyParton]

She went OFF on a friend of mine who was really close to her for losing weight after starting more exercise. The friend was about the size Bethany is now actually and apparently there had been some tension that she did not ‘support’ large bodies by getting bigger. We aren’t friends anymore but she was really upset that as someone more pear shaped and the ‘largest’ of the people Bert knew who wore non plus sizes she was ‘picked out’ to be a bopo follower. Basically ‘babes, you’re on the cusp so less of a project.’

Friend was having a lot of pain and possibly had fibro. So took up exercise (under advice) and turned out she had cancer. Had to have her lymph nodes removed in one arm, chemo, radiotherapy and a bunch of steroid treatments and went up from a UK14 to 20 and Bethany told her your body knows the size it wants to be. I saw that text. She may have meant it like ‘don’t diet right now, keep healing’ not ‘got ya large pal!’ but it landed as well as you’d expect to a woman in her mid 20s with cancer.

I think I might know who this is, won't name her as she's not got a huge follower count online but, if it's the same person I'm thinking of, I can remember a lot of nasty subtweets about fatphobia from our Good Pal Bert after this person tweeted that she was feeling uncomfortable due to a weight gain after steroid treatment on top of having lost her hair etc. If it's not the same person you're thinking of then it seems BR has done this to two different people. Such support. Much feminism.

 

[ShadieSadie]

I think I might know who this is, won't name her as she's not got a huge follower count online but, if it's the same person I'm thinking of, I can remember a lot of nasty subtweets about fatphobia from our Good Pal Bert after this person tweeted that she was feeling uncomfortable due to a weight gain after steroid treatment on top of having lost her hair etc. If it's not the same person you're thinking of then it seems BR has done this to two different people. Such support. Much feminism.

This person was pretty much Yer Pal Bert’s level of influencer when I knew them: blogger, podcaster, hosted events, big Twitter following, award winning, getting published, anthologies, magazine selections. I no longer keep contact and believe they went dark online but no idea why.

So it might be two different people which actually really upsets me. The person I knew was part of that group around The Arched Eyebrow Edgy Era who had multiple private Twitters and groups and were all subtweeting each other like Granny Gen X me passing notes in high school but they were the alpha betta fish in the pond and rich AF when Bert was trying to disguise her own bank balance so I fear it might be more than one. It would be vile at just one but the person involved did also plough through people like a butter knife and I could have seen it as ‘low blow because they screwed her on a deal.’

Ugh, I wish she was just hairy earrings level grifter not actual Grifter™️ level. That’s a spin she can’t boast away…

 

[IOrderedASandwich]

I am DYING to know whomst this is as I used to follow a lot of the bopo crew back then and the only big fish I can think of weren't especially loaded
---
Now thinking about all the back in the day blogs like Fuller Figure Fuller Bust, A Thrifty Mrs and Domestic Sluttery

 

[ShadieSadie]

I am DYING to know whomst this is as I used to follow a lot of the bopo crew back then and the only big fish I can think of weren't especially loaded
---
Now thinking about all the back in the day blogs like Fuller Figure Fuller Bust, A Thrifty Mrs and Domestic Sluttery

Less bopo, more literary and queer. Bert was in hindsight really trying to get into the literary scene to the point of going to anarchist spoken word nights because the host’s GF worked at a big lit agency or publishing house. But this person was the heaviest in those circles, maybe a UK 14 as the others were quite wafty waify exist on white wine that is vinegar at an event types. So she was encouraged to join the ‘anarchy’ of bopo and ‘riots not diets’ because clearly Bethany assumed she would be onboard.

Spoiler alert: she was not. But stuck around arguing about the definition of anarchy because she knew Bethany was rich and playing at the whole ‘common people’ thing and they all made good cover for each other which is why actually having not met posh people who do that (or any posh people) it took me ages to work out how much family wealth must be involved for so many.
(Domestic Sluttery was a hotbed for it btw…)

 

[smartalec]

I’m putting money on Ozempic cause 1. Rapidity of her weight loss 2. Apparent not changing diet - it’s why people like Mindy Kaling show up photos of constant baking etc as they can genuinely have a bite then leave it.

Its totally fine to do that, but obvs she has sneered and sub-tweeted anyone doing what she is doing before…
---

Less bopo, more literary and queer. Bert was in hindsight really trying to get into the literary scene to the point of going to anarchist spoken word nights because the host’s GF worked at a big lit agency or publishing house. But this person was the heaviest in those circles, maybe a UK 14 as the others were quite wafty waify exist on white wine that is vinegar at an event types. So she was encouraged to join the ‘anarchy’ of bopo and ‘riots not diets’ because clearly Bethany assumed she would be onboard.

Spoiler alert: she was not. But stuck around arguing about the definition of anarchy because she knew Bethany was rich and playing at the whole ‘common people’ thing and they all made good cover for each other which is why actually having not met posh people who do that (or any posh people) it took me ages to work out how much family wealth must be involved for so many.
(Domestic Sluttery was a hotbed for it btw…)

Ah man I really enjoyed Domestic Sluttery

 

[IOrderedASandwich]

I knew one person who wrote for them who was a freelancer and if she didn't happen to get enough work in for that month her parents would pay her London rent for her. Which is galling when I know so many people who were in creative industries that ended up being sidetracked into 'proper jobs' as otherwise they couldn't afford to live.

 

[ShadieSadie]

I knew one person who wrote for them who was a freelancer and if she didn't happen to get enough work in for that month her parents would pay her London rent for her. Which is galling when I know so many people who were in creative industries that ended up being sidetracked into 'proper jobs' as otherwise they couldn't afford to live.

I loved Domestic Sluttery and wrote for them and OMG, their invoicing was very ‘third new moon of the year when waxing not waning’ vague. Biodynamic bookkeeping. All very lovely if like the person you knew mum and dad are able to step in.

I don’t have that kind of back up so I had to chase and they genuinely couldn’t understand. It was ‘I’m off to see Shrimpy in Barbados and then it’s the artisan cheese awards so I’ll be adulting in three weeks babes. Promise.’ I had to go back and explain that if they did not pay me I was going to be a domestic bleep and have to earn money to pay bills the non subverted way. They were really shocked that I lived on freelancing without a partner or parents. ‘Oh you need paid to pay rent? Gosh, how modern!’

I liked working with them but the LOL of feminism that assumed you worked for pin money not wages. Then they and The Pool just stopped paying at all and I never knew if it was lack of cash or that whole ‘if you do what you love it doesn’t feel like work’ attitude to accounting followed some of them round.

TBF once I got my head round the existence of these unicorns and went on slum it upwards safari after the initial mutual shock of ‘I did not know you existed!’ I had a ball. No hard feelings toward any of the specific people. Just an urge to smash the whole system

 

[IOrderedASandwich]

Ah SS, I like you. And probably read a fair bit of your stuff back in the day!