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MrsBsDayOff

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Yes, I have anxiety and mild to moderate depression, largely under control these days with medication and management of my lifestyle/thought patterns.
There are certain triggers - if I don't sleep well my anxiety ramps up a bit. I avoid early flights at all costs and try to nap during the day if I get tired.

I tried reducing my meds a few months ago and it was a disaster, I felt awful after 3 days and could not concentrate at work, I had to go back on the 10mg dose.

There is help out there for you, I know what it's like to feel rock bottom and there is a way back. I started by going to my GP who prescribed meds and also recommended a therapist who I went to for a while.
 
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Rodneytrotter

Chatty Member
I had a complete meltdown at work last week and ended up having a go at my boss. Everything had just got on top of me. I do stand by what I said, but the way I said it was inappropriate and almost seemed like i was having a tantrum. I hate having these meltdowns.
 
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Rodneytrotter

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Yes, mostly anxiety but also suffer with ptsd and suffer with extremely low days including today. Im working myself up to telling my boss that I've been signed off for a week 😭
 
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MrsBsDayOff

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Thank you for the reassurance 🙏

Did you feel ok going back after 2 weeks or was it difficult?

I went in this morning, sat in the car park in tears, trying to pull myself together, do my deep breathing etc but just couldn't. Went into the building and told my boss I needed to leave and she said fine but nobody has contacted me and I know the school (I'm a teacher) are struggling financially and cannot afford supply teachers. Im embarrassed as on my way out I was visibly upset and had to walk past lots of staff as they were arriving, I wished I was invisible.

I feel I'm letting the children in my class down and the staff down. Also I'm paranoid I'll be gossiped about.
I was nervous going back, but it was actually fine. I got on with my day and tried to work at a slower pace and take one day at a time. People didn't act any differently (although they didn't know I was out for MH, I'd say they had a fair idea as I'd been visibly struggling).

The school struggling financially isn't your problem to worry about, that's for them to solve and for them to find a supply teacher. That's the last thing that you should be worrying about right now.

I wouldn't worry about staff seeing you upset, I've cried at work and seen others do it too, it's human nature.
I know a former colleague who is on leave because he had a nervous breakdown. I don't think any less of him in a personal or professional sense. I'm sure no one else does either, certainly not the few colleagues that I've spoken to.

Mental health problems are an illness for attendance purposes like a cold or a flu would be. You can't be let go from the school for that. You need to look at it the same as if you had a physical illness like a flu or a broken leg, rather than focusing on it as a 'stigma'
 
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mrs.darcy

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I've had anxiety since my teens (in my 60s now) and was diagnosed with GAD in 2020. I hid the anxiety for a long time but it got really bad during Covid so I sought help.

I had low-level CBT and I'm not on any medication. I have good days and bad days but there are more good days than bad now and the coping mechanisms have helped me a lot.
 
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VioletButterfly

VIP Member
I’m sorry you’re struggling @Rockin' Robin . Till you find a new course of treatment, do you have any methods of de-stressing a little? I hope I’m not repeating myself, but I found that going to a zen moment in my memory, and focusing on the sights and smells and feelings of that moment, can really bring me back to a softer, calmer state of mind. if you can emotionally travel back to that one perfect moment, hold onto it, pause it and stay in that moment for as long as you need, for me it’s like smelling salts to bring one out of a faint. It snapped me right of a full blown panic episode, and that’s the zen moment I grab onto whenever the stress is taking me to a bad place. 🌹 Sending lots of good thoughts your way.
 
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Rodneytrotter

Chatty Member
Don't feel guilty about it, I had to take 2 weeks off work once due to bad anxiety, and I would be the type who is very diligent about work and hates missing a day due to illness. I felt guilty at the time but after talking through it with family I changed my mindset and then didn't feel one bit guilty.
The doctor put a chest infection or something on the sick note for me, if you don't feel comfortable disclosing MH issues to your employer.
Thank you for the reassurance 🙏

Did you feel ok going back after 2 weeks or was it difficult?

I went in this morning, sat in the car park in tears, trying to pull myself together, do my deep breathing etc but just couldn't. Went into the building and told my boss I needed to leave and she said fine but nobody has contacted me and I know the school (I'm a teacher) are struggling financially and cannot afford supply teachers. Im embarrassed as on my way out I was visibly upset and had to walk past lots of staff as they were arriving, I wished I was invisible.

I feel I'm letting the children in my class down and the staff down. Also I'm paranoid I'll be gossiped about.
 
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Rodneytrotter

Chatty Member
I was nervous going back, but it was actually fine. I got on with my day and tried to work at a slower pace and take one day at a time. People didn't act any differently (although they didn't know I was out for MH, I'd say they had a fair idea as I'd been visibly struggling).

The school struggling financially isn't your problem to worry about, that's for them to solve and for them to find a supply teacher. That's the last thing that you should be worrying about right now.

I wouldn't worry about staff seeing you upset, I've cried at work and seen others do it too, it's human nature.
I know a former colleague who is on leave because he had a nervous breakdown. I don't think any less of him in a personal or professional sense. I'm sure no one else does either, certainly not the few colleagues that I've spoken to.

Mental health problems are an illness for attendance purposes like a cold or a flu would be. You can't be let go from the school for that. You need to look at it the same as if you had a physical illness like a flu or a broken leg, rather than focusing on it as a 'stigma'
I completely agree with you and would always encourage others to take time off if struggling, I just cant do it myself! I'm glad you settled back into work okay after your time off.
 
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Hey 👋 I have suffered from anxiety since 21 when I had a panic attack abroad I suddenly felt scared couldn’t sleep and it lasted most of the week it was petrifying. Since then my anxiety has been the Bain of my life 😭 i had just left uni and I think going into the real world triggered it. I’d been a nervous shy child so was already a bit that way never wanting to leave my mom till year 5 and crying to go in to school most days. I have adhd and not sure how much symptoms are caused by that tbh. But since 21 I’ve suffered horribly. Some times I’ll have better periods and sometimes worse for example the last month for me has been hell my ocd has really played up I keep getting intrusive thoughts and i had a awful panic attack which basically last two days I can never seem to calm down very well :( usually need diazepam to help to come out of it. I’m usually sick and shaky and the fear is just awful. It’s nice to relate to people. I’m on sertraline and also currently doing CBT with the nhs it took two years for the appointment. I’m hoping this helps and it feels like it’s helped so far and now I know it’s ocd and not me it’s really helped me have hope for the future but some days are still harder than others. Because of my anxiety I’m not like other 29 year olds I still live at home and really rely on my family for emotional support which makes me feel really guilty and shit but I feel so weak and helpless at times that I don’t know what to do :( I’ll get there I guess. Also when I have pms my symptoms get a lot worse. I have tried cutting caffeine and sugar out but I haven’t noticed much change or less symptoms :( xx
 
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Carapop

VIP Member
Thanks for your comment, I mentioned it to the doctor over the phone today (I was almost in tears explaining that i'd had a bad speculum experience twice before) and she was sympathetic and said something like 'we'll try make it easy for you'. I hope she's nice in person, she is a new GP in this surgery. They have on my medical notes already that I'm treated in this surgery for anxiety (I take antidepressants). Yeah I really hope she offers valium.
I'll let you know how it goes.
All the very best of luck! Hopefully it being a new doctor will mean she will have a new approach and you’ll not be reminded of past experiences. Try and see this as a fresh start.
 
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Rockin' Robin

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Yes.
Recently diagnosed with a type of schizoid personality disorder.

It causes me to be emotionless and cold. I favour solitude and shun people. I've no interest in relationships or sex or friends etc.

It's not hard to live with tbh, I don't feel distress or suicidal etc. But I neither feel joy or hope.

Make of that what you will.
Welcome to Tattle. Best wishes to you.
 
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Hello everyone,

I wondered if you might be able to help me. I’ve been poorly for years but only received an official diagnosis around 3 months ago. I’ve been diagnosed with EUPD and am currently on a trial of anti-psychotics. I’m being monitored closely to check my body responds to the drug.

For the past three years I haven’t been well enough to work due to random psychotic breaks. I’ve been hospitalised 3 times. I can go weeks feeling and looking completely normal and then wake up like a different person. It’s so random, I’m unable to plan things very far in advance. We are hoping the medication will help this. My psychiatrist is confident but I’m very wary.

Anyway, I’ve been living on my savings and not claiming anything at all. He told me I may be eligible for PIP due to my diagnosis and medication on record etc. I’ve just started the process and I’m waiting for the claim form to arrive. Does anybody have experience with this? I genuinely think I won’t qualify because as I said, I can be a completely happy and normal person for weeks at a time. It’s like there’s 2 different people living in my head.

PIP would definitely be helpful as I could stop dipping into my savings until I’m stable enough (fingers crossed) to go back to work.

A x
Hi, I have this condition as well and can totally sympathise, it's the worst thing ever! I currently take Duloxetine and Lamotrigine, it has worked for the past few years but I'm not sure if it's starting to not be as affective as my spending is becoming a problem and my relationship with my boyfriend is starting to deteriorate because of my moods, one minute I love him so much and the next I'm telling him to drop dead 🙄. I don't know how I feel, it's a nightmare although he is very patient with me. I also have suicidal thoughts on a daily basis but I know I'll never go through with it because of my children.
I do claim ESA and PIP, (I do have other medical issues though), I will warn you applying for PIP is a very stressful process, the assessors are ruthless idiots who tend to lie. PIP is based on how the condition affects you on a daily basis not the actual condition. I was told years ago by a lady from DWP that you fill the form in as if it was your worst day ever, if you get what I mean. There is a charity called Fightback who are based in Bury who are really, really good at helping with advice, they have a Facebook page. I would definitely contact them before filling in forms.
Wishing you lots of luck x
 
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Black.bird

VIP Member
Random question, and may seem a bit superficial, but has any one had issues losing weight on Sertraline?
I gained weight when I first started taking it again recently (have been on it for 25+ years but had a huge break in between as I didn't feel I needed it, then tried some other things). The weight gain wasn't an issue when I first took it all those years ago.

Anyway, moving on ... so, weight gain more recently. I went down to having two big meals a day instead of three, which has been a huge help - the weight went back down to what it should be, and I still feel as if I'm eating enough.
 
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JSquared

VIP Member
I gained weight when I first started taking it again recently (have been on it for 25+ years but had a huge break in between as I didn't feel I needed it, then tried some other things). The weight gain wasn't an issue when I first took it all those years ago.

Anyway, moving on ... so, weight gain more recently. I went down to having two big meals a day instead of three, which has been a huge help - the weight went back down to what it should be, and I still feel as if I'm eating enough.
thank you! I’ll keep to my calorie counting and see what happens! 🤞🏻
 
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Yes 100% as for as long as I can remember… have been on medication for about 8 years now, to be honest I don’t think I’ll ever be fully off them. A recent bereavement due to suicide in my family has torn me apart, I’ve gained a lot of weight and just seem to be in survival mode… going to work and that’s it. I’m going to get help and I need to look after myself better.
 
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Tatooine_legend1

VIP Member
I suffer from anxiety, which can be extremely debilitating; I've had it for almost 30 years and it was triggered by a succession of events. I have to be extremely careful about what I watch on TV, listen to on talk radio, and see in print, which I'm good at doing. At my worse, I will shake (uncontrollably), find it hard to breathe, and start vomiting.

I take Sertraline (have done for years) - before this, I tried several other drugs but suffered side effects with every single one. Sertraline sort of numbs everything ... it can't stop an anxiety attack in its tracks though.

I have done, and do, cognitive based therapy sessions via online and in person ... these are a great help; and I surround myself with things and people that keep me balanced (I do at least recognise triggers). I also attend a support group from time to time.

Lately, I've been wondering if I might have ADHD/OCD too; however, my GP is confident it's more likely to be symptoms of menopause.

I used to feel very alone in having to take medication for mental health issues, but during the first Covid lockdown suddenly realised how many people take it in my community when the pharmacy ran out of Sertraline!

It's nothing to be ashamed about; although I'm disappointed to share that I have had former friends and family members scoff and say that "anxiety" is something that everybody has, and who have said that anyone who claims it as an illness is self-serving. Ignorance at its finest!
Sorry for late reply. I made this thread and totally forgot. Yeah so many people seem to be on meds these days. I think it's just the way it is these days as so many people are stressed out.

It sounds like you've been on a journey. 30 years is a long time. I think mine is hereditary. You are the same as me, I also have triggers. I have also been back n forth to doctors and hospital, getting tests for some health concerns. This is the worse for me as It's all waiting, waiting, waiting on results etc. This makes me super anxious and I struggle to sleep, shake, sweat, you name it.

How are you coping with your mental health these days?

I have suffered with social anxiety all my life. I also go through periods of depression, I am going through one at the moment. These last two years have been some of the most difficult in my life, I'm not just talking about the pandemic. I'm talking about things that have happened on a personal level.
I have spoken about some of the difficulties I have experienced, in other threads on Tattle, so I won't bother repeating them here. I am lucky to have a supportive partner, but he has his own health problems. I prefer not to go down the medication route, I would rather try talking therapies. But that is just me. I should also add, that I tend to do a lot of comfort eating, when I am stressed or unhappy. I do not recommend this.
Anyone who says that anxiety and mental health issues happen to everyone, needs to walk in our shoes. If someone has a broken leg, we can sympathise with them because we can see the symptoms. Mental health is much more complex, and can be difficult to understand.
Yeah I agree about mental health is so often overlooked because it isn't something people can see. I know people in other countries, one being in Kenya. The mental health issues out there are overlooked and not taken seriously.

Sadly, this has led to many men committing suicide because they get very little help. Across the world it seems that mental health issues are often overlooked. We do a better job in this country at diagnosing and treating, but it's still not ideal.

Yeah, there's a difference between feeling down and having depression or anxiety disorder. The latter can be and are debilitating.
 
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Rockin' Robin

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I’m sorry you’re struggling @Rockin' Robin . Till you find a new course of treatment, do you have any methods of de-stressing a little? I hope I’m not repeating myself, but I found that going to a zen moment in my memory, and focusing on the sights and smells and feelings of that moment, can really bring me back to a softer, calmer state of mind. if you can emotionally travel back to that one perfect moment, hold onto it, pause it and stay in that moment for as long as you need, for me it’s like smelling salts to bring one out of a faint. It snapped me right of a full blown panic episode, and that’s the zen moment I grab onto whenever the stress is taking me to a bad place. 🌹 Sending lots of good thoughts your way.
Thank you so much for your reply, I am trying to deal with things one step at a time.
Today was slightly better, I managed to get some important stuff done. I don't think I'll be doing too much tomorrow though.
 
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Some People!

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Oh definitely.

I have some very dark depressive episodes and have been seriously depressive since my early teens (am 42).
I've been medicated for that on and off - sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't.
I paid for private counselling for a couple of years which was somewhat helpful, but I could never afford that again (it was only affordable then because it was a pay-what-you-can-afford situation, there's nothing like that around now).
The NHS sent me for a short course (like 3 months maybe?) of IPT which would maybe have been useful if I could have continued it longer term. It was just getting good when it was over. I accessed this after making a case for CBT over the phone being unsuitable. I hate that there's this Trial By CBT now that you have to go through to access anything more/actually helpful.
There is definitely more to my MH issues than depression, probably some type of social anxiety or similar in the mix, probably a massive personality disorder. Making friends is hard, keeping friends is harder, and at times I've been so lonely it physically hurts. I take things very personally and deeply and some early instances of this have really shaped my life.

I get by, most of the time. I'm seldom super happy. After all this time I've kinda come to the conclusion that, objectively speaking, I'm just basically not a very nice person who is also deeply flawed and unlikeable, especially by myself, and it's probably too late to do anything about it.
I'm just trying to raise my kid to do and be better than me, to try things, be social, be kind, not hold grudges, to ask for help at the first signs of sadness and to give her the best help and support I can.
That'll be the best thing I can do for myself now.
 
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