Alone on New Year's Eve 2022

[mozzarellagirl]

I thought I'd make a thread for those of us that will be alone (or will feel alone) tonight. We can share our plans (if we have any) and talk about why we might be alone if it helps (?)

I'll be alone tonight and I feel a bit half and half about it. I have woken feeling quite down and alone already. But I did spend last night with a group of people who made me feel utterly invisible.

I'm 26 and the last couple of NYEs have all felt the same. Lonely, depressing and sad. Is this what it will always be like?

(Obviously covid has been at play but also all my friends are spread across the UK so it's harder to meet and organise. Especially with cost of living atm)

I'd just like to know I'm not the only one.

Please tell me your plans for today and tonight 🥹

 

[mozzarellagirl]

I was alone on Christmas, that felt harder. This feels like any other day for me personally.

I bought pizza and chocolate so I'm relatively happy.

Who was the group of people you were with last night?

my sister and her friends. they came over and my mum joined too and both her and my sister love to drink and when they do they get snappy, aggresive and mean (but only at me - im the youngest) reminds me of when i was in school and would come home to my mum drunk and nasty.
my sisters friends are not my kind of people - made awful jokes about horrific things that gave me a lump in my throat and my eyes water. at one point i had to go upstairs because my heart was pounding out my chest and i was on the verge of tears
i tried to speak to my mum about the "jokes" and i was dismissed and snarled at

they didn't even notice when i slipped away and when i did try and re-join it was like i wasn't even in the room. id try to join in and joke and play games and id be ignored and it was like they all decided that anything i said wasnt funny or worth listening to.

i went to bed feeling truly alone and sad in my heart. felt trodden on

this was after christmas where once again, my sister made me cry from being so nasty (but it's all in direct so my mum acts obvliviois most times) and when i want to call her out on it, i get told not to because "it'll cause drama"

that was a ramble, apologies
~

thank you all for posting on this thread, it's making me feel better 🥹

 

[LittlePea]

I'm alone for NYE this year. I was meant to be spending it with my boyfriend, but he dumped 2 days ago. Tbh I've struggled to find something to do on NYE for the past few years.

I feel really, really down about finally having to spend one alone tbh - I feel at 27, I should have a big group of friends to go out with. I've had quite a struggle with my mental health for the past 4/5 years but this year is the worst it's ever gotten to and I've definitely hit rock bottom. My body dysmorphia has left me isolated and I've lost all my friends because of it

Hugs to everyone else that's having a tough time, I hope things get better for all of us.

 

[JSquared]

I think a lot of the pressure comes from social media. People only show their best bits and some of what is shown is staged. That’s what we need to remember x

 

[Lalla]

I'm on my own(ish). Son is here but he spends all his time in his room, so I'm basically on my own.
I've had FOMO for 20 odd years about NYE, always struggled to find something to do, most people I knew always went to the pub which I couldn't as I had young kids, or they went to family parties which I wasn't invited to. Once my kids got older it wasn't any better as everyone started staying in, or going away. Even meeting my Ex didn't help, as he had less friends than me!

There's this whole perception that you should be spending New Year with a big crowd of people and for most of us it's bollocks. My parents never went out on New Year, when I was young we'd have a little celebration at home and toast the New Year and that was it.

Last year for the first time I decided I was over it all. I was happy to be with my then partner, just the two of us. I spent the evening watching shit on TV and he was asleep on my lap from about 8pm til I woke him up just before midnight. And it was fine.

And now this year we're no longer together. So tonight I've got chocolate peanuts and popcorn, and am watching Criminal Minds. I have got some fake Baileys but not sure whether to open it as it's possible eldest son may need a lift home later. He's been an arse today so I should just tell him to get an Uber, but I'm a mug.

Thank you for this thread It's a welcome break from the current bragfest on my social media and a nice reminder that a quite New Year is perfectly normal and entirely acceptable.

 

[mozzarellagirl]

I’ve been on my own on NYE for 7 years now since my last relationship ended. I went out with a friend one year, but to be honest I prefer to be in on my own Just me and my 9 year old who will be in bed way before midnight. I understand how it can be hard. The first year I cried and felt so down. Now though it’s just like any other day to me. I relax in my PJs and watch whatever I want on tv. It’s over-hyped so much, which puts pressure on people. It’s just another day and it definitely gets easier with time

I really do feel the pressure. It quite literally causes anxiety within me. It's the same every year for my birthday too. The pressure to be having a fucking brilliant!!! amazing!!! social!!! partying time!!!

and even if you are at a party in a silver sparky dress, drinking wine and dancing under a disco ball... it still feels like you're not doing enough or having "enough" fun

 

[xbxbx]

I’m alone tonight out of choice. I spend a lot of time alone because it’s the only time I truly feel at peace. Other people can be so overwhelming lol.

Currently drinking homemade margaritas and catching up on YouTube. Will probably do a face mask later or my nails maybe.

Hogmanay is just another day for me. I’ve spent many years going out and getting drunk with friends that I don’t feel like I’m missing out anymore (not that my friends go out anymore either). Just do what makes you happy - pay no attention to anyone else

 

[Kim Mild]

I think New Year is a lonely night. Even in Relationships I'd rather treat it as a normal night and go to bed at usual time.

 

[Sibz]

It sounds pathetic but I get upset at Christmas ending when it's new years eve so depressing knowing everything will be packed away and we'll be back to work (or school when I was younger) in couple of days. I'm listening to Christmas songs atm to cheer myself up

 

[justonemorepage]

Sorry to hear of those struggling at this time of year. It really is a depressing day isn't it? I feel like most people who "celebrate" are probably also feeling low/alone but are trying their best to get through it the best way they know how. I've never liked New Years, even as a child I'd feel low/depressed/sad etc and then one year a family member passed away on New Years Eve and it all but broke me. I couldn't even withstand people saying the words "happy new year" to me, nor could I say it back. I still struggle with that if I'm honest. Usually I try my best to ignore the day now but it's literally rammed down our throats on SM and with the fireworks going off. I always feel lonely, no matter who I'm with. I always feel down, no matter what I'm doing. I usually stay in with my other half and we just eat crap and watch TV and try to forget what day it is. I honestly feel that a lot of people struggle on this day, you're not alone. Sending love

 

[Blonde_moment]

I’ve been on my own on NYE for 7 years now since my last relationship ended. I went out with a friend one year, but to be honest I prefer to be in on my own Just me and my 9 year old who will be in bed way before midnight. I understand how it can be hard. The first year I cried and felt so down. Now though it’s just like any other day to me. I relax in my PJs and watch whatever I want on tv. It’s over-hyped so much, which puts pressure on people. It’s just another day and it definitely gets easier with time

 

[SleepyDibillo]

I don't think social media helps. One thing that always used to get me down (which weirdly hasn't this year so I am taking that as a win) is how much people had 'accomplished' and comparing myself. It got better after I deleted social media a few years ago but was still there for a long time after.

Agreed. Social media is the thief of joy and I’m glad I don’t have to read any of those type of posts this year from people bragging about how amazing their year has been. Social media is just a snapshot in time of someone’s life and is not representative of their day to day life (I still have to regularly remind myself of that even though I’m not on social media any more!) The best person we can compare ourselves to is our old selves to appreciate how far we’ve come.

 

[jenna6387]

Sending you a big hug

I’ve spent the last several years on my own. Firstly i didn’t have any other option but now I prefer it. I do still feel lonely though, though being out with people does make that feeling worse.

That said I’ve always had the offer to be with my mum and her partner, or the last two years my mum and Nanna. I’d still rather be on my own.

What I do is make sure I have a bottle of bubbly, either a takeaway or yummy food. A feel good movie, some journaling or figuring out my new year goals. then going bed when I want to.

Im not always awake at midnight.

I have two cats and a dog so I put on classical radio to counter the fireworks going off too.

 

[mozzarellagirl]

Sending you a big hug
Im not always awake at midnight.

I have two cats and a dog so I put on classical radio to counter the fireworks going off too.

hugs

i wish i could be asleep at 12 but i'm such a night owl

i have a little cat and she finds the fireworks so startling. her ears go back and her eyes are all big and panicked

My plan is to drink some cider and maybe some prosecco and post on tattle (and other places around the web). I've started already.

I've decided to clean my bedroom specifically top to bottom. Full cleanse for my mind and symbolic also. hoovered, clean sheets, incense, polish etc and I just want to snuggle with my cat and probably be on tattle too

 

[FilthyGorgeous]

Christ almighty the speeches are in full flow now Think I’ll stay off social media tonight.

 

[L3moning]

My plan is to drink some cider and maybe some prosecco and post on tattle (and other places around the web). I've started already.

 

[Lola Ruby]

It sounds pathetic but I get upset at Christmas ending when it's new years eve so depressing knowing everything will be packed away and we'll be back to work (or school when I was younger) in couple of days. I'm listening to Christmas songs atm to cheer myself up

I’m exactly the same! I love Christmas so much but feel like I never get to fully enjoy it because I’m so busy with work etc in the lead up to it & then once it’s here it’s over before you know it and people seem to just forget about it? And then I feel like I didn’t get that “Christmassy” feeling enough. I’ve been dragging it out for as long as possible this week listening to Christmas music and watching cheesy Christmas films!

NYE really is the most depressing end to Christmas and I’m never anyone’s choice to spend it with anymore so it’s the second year in a row I’ve spent it at home with my boyfriend. I just about came to terms with it last night & enjoyed not having to dress up etc but it was still quite confronting seeing everyone else at parties etc. I feel like the older I get the smaller my friend group becomes & the more they become closer friends with others & it’s hard when my NYE plans used to include them. Sorry this turned really depressing lol! I just find New Year’s to be really confronting & anxiety-inducing

 

[prozacprincess]

I’m already in my bed after an exhausting week at work. I’ve got to be back in tomorrow as we have a lot of crew off sick, so I’m doing my best to compensate for that. We were invited to a party but I didn’t want to go as it’s quite far away so it meant staying the night. I’m not really a new year person and I find the whole thing to be very melancholic… I usually disappear at 11.55pm if we are with friends so I can be alone with my thoughts and not have to join in the whole “Happy New Year” bullshit.

 

[shadowcat5]

Maybe it's social media nowadays but I think there was a lot of pressure for the millennium and it never really went away for new year.

I don't think social media helps. One thing that always used to get me down (which weirdly hasn't this year so I am taking that as a win) is how much people had 'accomplished' and comparing myself. It got better after I deleted social media a few years ago but was still there for a long time after.

 

[Some People!]

I'm finishing off some New Year's tarot readings, getting the kid into bed before too late, and getting into a scaldy hot bath with a couple of glasses of hot mulled cider.
Then I'll sit around for a bit, write an over-ambitious to-do list for tomorrow, and slope off to bed.
I'll be posting & reading here and elsewhere I expect

I love my own company at times like these when expectations are high. Just opt out and do my own thing.