Age gaps

[anon2345]

Yeah he’s a similar age to my parents (partner is 55, my mum is 54 and my dad is 58.) I’m happy, obviously, but people do think he’s my dad a lot and that’s not nice to deal with!



that sounds so romantic!

Does it bother your parents or do they all get along?

 

[Mr Daydream]

13 years, I’m 27 and he’s 40. I would never date a man that wasn’t at least 10 years older than me but 16 years gap is my limit

 

[bringingdownthebs]

Really sorry you went through a crap time with you ex but it’s lovely you got your happy ending like we all deserve! Yeah I know what you mean about dads wanting us girls to be looked after. I’m really independent, earn my own money etc but my husband gives me a great life, yes we work together to achieve everything we have but his like mindiness makes it.
We’ve a 6 year age gap, I’m 34 and he is 40. Both of us married before and now trying for a baby together (I don’t have kids, he has a son)

thank you! Sending you lots of baby dust! how old is your partner’s little boy?
I’m finding it difficult to adjust to the whole ‘step mum’ role. My partner has 3 children with his ex wife - they’re 21, 19 and 17.

He’s 6 months and 5 days older than me met at our local park. Childhood sweethearts lol we’ve been together from we were 15!

that’s beautiful

 

[Laughingforlife]

I must admit we have a much bigger age gap than you but have never had comments like that. Maybe we're lucky...

I think it's maybe because I started to like him when I was young, so they didn't think I actually loved him.

 

[Tinkerbell cat]

I am 32 and my partner is 29. I can't wait until he turns 30, haha. He definitely is the more mature one that is for sure. I know there isn't much in it though!

My last long term relationship my partner was 14yrs older I think I was like 25 and he was 39! we got on really well at the start but then we wanted diff things.

 

[Stitched]

Almost 4 years, he’s 27 (turning 28 soon), I’m 24

 

[Laughingforlife]

I totally resonate with your post.
Recently a new mama friend told me that I need to make plans for me and my baby in case something happens. ( referring to my husband dropping off ).

I thought she was so brazen I decided to say well,
“I am married first and have my finances in order. Secondly your partner/bf may end up in a car crash what will you do ? ”
Never ever would I dare say that to someone on a normal day, but I was so offended with what she said as it wasn’t the first time so I decided to use her partners name.
I will tell you something I have a 20 something age year gap and many friends/family have judged.
Most don’t care now. They wish to find love like we have and they don’t even mention our age gap.

As long as you have basic morals I don’t think you should care what other people say. Live your own life and laugh at those comments.
There are couples who are similar age gap and stay together and have no love.

Thank you. I should learn to laugh it off, but when I was younger it really did get to me.

 

[Amyx1518]

Nine years and 3 days! Lol

 

[Mrs Cucumber]

5 years between me and my husband, there was 21 years between me and my ex and apart from sex, we had nothing in common.
My friends have 19 year age difference and have an amazing relationship

 

[Moolo]

8 years. I'm 38 husband is 46, so not much of a difference but I like having a slightly older husband. Past relationships have been my age or younger than me and i found it quite hard work.

Some people are funny about age gap relationship....who cares as long as you are happy

Mine is the same (7 years now as I just turned 39)

Not a large age gap I dont think and never really noticed much of a difference as my friendship group is all ages as well.

 

[Randy Marsh]

17 years. He's the older one.

 

[WilmaHun]

I’m 8 months older. It’s not until I’ve commented on this thread I’ve realised I’ve been telling people wrong for years I normally say Im 6 months older which is a lie, I just can’t count. Been together 8 years since we were 17

 

[LittleMy]

2 years. I’m 32, he’s 34.

 

[Lanie]

Six year gap husband is older.

Been married almost seven years and together ten.

 

[Laurenia]

He is 6 years older than me. We met at work too!

 

[ElectricDreams]

He's 2 years older than me, I'm 39, he's 41

 

[bringingdownthebs]

Oh my love, I had a similar miracle baby and high risk pregnancy and it really is like you’re holding your breath for 9 months isn’t it? It took me a year to even decorate her room so I can’t imagine how it must be for you dealing with finances like this. Sorry to go IN like this but it just worries me so much as so many women end up financially disadvantaged through marriage and motherhood. I had similar but different in that my husband was financially supporting quite a few family members when we met just as he’d “done well” which is lovely for them but not good for him growing his long term life, had to get rid of all that and ended up in massive dramas with it all, tbh it was so upsetting at the time it probably would have been a deal breaker had I known about the degree of financial leaching beforehand but you live and learn ey. Sorry to lecture you from afar it’s just as someone who’s been through 3% of this I wouldn’t wish a nasty surprise on anyone! Enjoy those baby cuddles most importantly tho xx

Exactly like you spend 9 months holding your breath! It was really stressful too as the reaction from his eldest daughter when we announced we were pregnant was awful, as well, and every time I went into hospital with a problem I kept it really quiet because I felt like she’d be glad if something bad happened. She’s come round a lot now, though, and loves spending time with the baby so I guess time was a healer! Ironically, me catching Covid and ending up in hospital when I was 30 weeks pregnant seemed to bring everyone closer together! It’s been an absolutely crazy 18 months really.
I just dropped the idea of talking about money into conversation after the kids went to bed last night and he said he’d actually been looking at his pensions when he was doing paperwork yesterday… so I feel like that’s a promising start!!

 

[bringingdownthebs]

Our age gap is 10 years, he's the older one. Been together 15 years now.

Do you have any future-proofing plans yet, such as insurance, wills, etc? And what to consider when he has retired and you're still at the peak of your own career.

My OH is retiring next year and I'll be in full time work still. He is going to be taking on another job to see him through to state pension age in 12 years time.

We’ve only just started discussing the future proofing plans as his divorce is taking ages and we’re unsure exactly how much he’ll be left with after the sale of his family home etc. I’ve said if we ever get married I’m happy to sign a prenup as I’m absolutely not in this for his money at all - hence us only just starting to discuss the future in terms of finances etc. We have a child together (he’s 5 months old) so our main priority is making sure everything is secure for him.
That being said… my partner has always said he’ll work until he’s 65 so he’s got another 10 years yet!

11 year between us.
8 year together and 5 years married. I'm 30 and he's 41 but 18 at heart and just a big kid. He's my absolute best friend and the age difference has never made any difference.

that’s so lovely

 

[bringingdownthebs]

Agree completely. I think the grooming element is still a v important convo even if the younger participant is in their 20s or 30s as there will inevitably be a power/financial imbalance between the two. But the same applies for large income disparity relationships even of the same age. I’m relieved that the way in which we talk about consent, grooming, and abuse is getting better (but not silly enough to think it’s perfect) and hoping the next gen of girls don’t need to go through what was normalised for us all.

completely 100% agree with this!

 

[bringingdownthebs]

I think older men know what they are doing! my ex was 21 years older, absolute dickhead but amazing in bed!

yeah I can attest to this! They deffo know what they’re doing!