Monkeypoopants
Well-known member
The Tim Tracker #71: LIVE: From Ft. Pampers it’s The Tim Tracker Home Vlog!
Just to make it official for voting.
Just to make it official for voting.
hcslacs
VIP Member
We had a tie for the thread title so I took a page out of Jen's book and just mashed them together like her nonsensical vid titles.
So congrats to @Galorious and to @airbusA330! Oh, and @airbusA330 is in London so I guess I should also be more Jen-ful and try to be stereotypical and instead of "congrats" something more like “Pip pip, cheerio, jolly good and all that to you guyz”
Previous thread recap:
Tim sits us down for a health update and he tells us he has 1) The hiatal hernia, 2) enosophilic esophagitis and 3) Barrett's esophagus. The doctor advised him to start some medicine but not only does Tim have an engineering brain, but apparently a medical one as well and he decides rather than meds he going to go ham on a very restrictive diet cutting out gluten, dairy, fatty meat, bubbly drinks, chocolate and sugar.
Junk giveaway: The Trackers apparently did some light house cleaning and pulled a bunch of crap together to give to the IG Stans as giveaways. And yes, it was mostly junk comprised of a lot of free stuff they were given at various theme park events or openings. Like grade school carnival prize level junk.
Hooome vlog: Jen somehow seems to have FOMO over the explosive diarrhea outbreak so she drowns her sorrows in trying tinned sardines again. Six-month too late to be on trend influencer Jen still can’t hide the disgust on her face when eating them. And she still has several tins in her pantry because she had to buy a shitload all at once. Sardine Girlie challenge? Fail.
They show off their latest Amazon haul where Jen stays on the fish theme, but this time she bought some face product made from salmon sperm. Sperm Girlie? Success! Tim shows off his SDE by buying giant binoculars. Why you ask? Because his ego couldn’t handle seeing everyone else on the cruise have better ones than the shitty little pair he bought on the ship. But no worries, he’ll continue to use the smaller pair for his Broadway shows. Jen shows off her clown shorts, I guess to match her clown face.
PR haul: The Trackers are still lazy at opening mail and decide to open several PR packages various companies sent them. “Time sensitive” has never meant a thing to them so amongst the packages are some things from Jeanette McCurdy to promote her now 6 old month book and the Orlando Magic from their playoff run back in April.
Chicago: On their way to their Alaska cruise they stay a few days in Chicago to once again feed Tim’s Pokemon obsession. They stay in a historically old Hilton and the Trackers can’t hide their disgust at it. They walked to the Field Museum where we endure Tim reading off every single Pokemon exhibit for what seems like hours. Tim did walk a few extra feet to show us Lake Michigan, from quite a distance. They ventured out a whole block and a half for dinner.
Harry Potter Lug bag. Several “influencers” are invited out to a Lug bag event at Universal where they are given robes in addition to building bags. Even though Tim, Nick and the Bippidi Boppit chick are #hosted they seem to forget the premise of HP and act more like fairies than wizards--well at least Tim and Nick.
Patreon: They promoted a new discounted 15% savings on their Patreon if you buy a yearly membership upfront. It doesn’t seem to be attracting any new members, only existing member that most likely would have stayed around for a year anyway. So win?
Busch Gardens: Tim was invited out to celebrate the closing of a rolly coasty and surprisingly attends himself instead of sending the help. He probably needs his alone time after dealing with Jen and the boys for so long. Tim rides Kumba three times with his pube beard flowing in the wind. He determines all other rolly coasties have too long of a line so he skips them and Jen just adds old ride footage from various old vids. Jen is working on her creativity and works in a few “future” Tims in odd places including in a Teletubby-like sun and, more appropriately, in a trash can. As strict as Tim has been with his new diet one would assume he would also avoid speedy and intense thrill rides. But Dr Tim knows all, right?
Six Ravens: It’s time to gorge on some Hot Pockets at the new concept from Gideon’s with their old pal Nick. Nick waited in the virtual queue for an hour until Tim and Jen joined him near the end. I guess the desperation to be Tim’s friend still blinds that idiot in realizing that they hate him and they only use him for things like this. So they are still looking for any excuse to ditch the kids in what is quickly becoming one less summer that they get to spend with them. Jen devours several Hot Pockets sitting on the ground while Tim asks if she thinks he would have liked any of them. Oh, goodie, Tim gets to try some potatoes. This new “allergy” diet thing is getting real old, real fast. Jen decides to add more voog footage from a different DS day where they spent a shitload of time fondling Halloween merch followed by a brunch at the Boathouse. For yet another meal Tim gets meat and potatoes, with no butter. Jen is amazed that they are so accommodating with “allergies”. Yes, Jen, it is 2026 and allergies are so common where no restaurant wants to deal with any repercussions from allergens so they take this shit seriously.
Mike is spotted cruising with Rae and June. A convention of people thrown off Tracker Island?
Cruise: They are off to Vancouver from Chicago via LAX (yeah, it doesn’t make sense) but they are the travel experts. A quick night’s stay at the Fairmont before boarding the ship and the cruise footage must be a disaster because she puts travel day, embarkation and the 2nd day al in one vid. Jen is disinterested in anything Tim has to say and seems to be pretty much crying the entire cruise. Tim seems to be faring a tad better. No booty butts yet, but he attempts to seem interested in the scenery and wildlife so maybe that’s getting him through it all.
Tattler news:
I would like to thank everyone so much for the well wishes regarding my dog's passing. It wasn’t my first, and certainly won’t be my last, but this one was just extraordinarily devastating but your kinds words have helped. Again, thank you all.
And I hate to be selfish and hog all the Tattler personal news but my divorce was also finalized this week and it’s not some place I ever thought I would be and it’s been really tough, but each day I do find happiness growing so maybe in the end it will be for the best, so I am choosing nothing but positivity around it, So I’d like to raise a glass with you all.
Previous thread:
So congrats to @Galorious and to @airbusA330! Oh, and @airbusA330 is in London so I guess I should also be more Jen-ful and try to be stereotypical and instead of "congrats" something more like “Pip pip, cheerio, jolly good and all that to you guyz”
Previous thread recap:
Tim sits us down for a health update and he tells us he has 1) The hiatal hernia, 2) enosophilic esophagitis and 3) Barrett's esophagus. The doctor advised him to start some medicine but not only does Tim have an engineering brain, but apparently a medical one as well and he decides rather than meds he going to go ham on a very restrictive diet cutting out gluten, dairy, fatty meat, bubbly drinks, chocolate and sugar.
Junk giveaway: The Trackers apparently did some light house cleaning and pulled a bunch of crap together to give to the IG Stans as giveaways. And yes, it was mostly junk comprised of a lot of free stuff they were given at various theme park events or openings. Like grade school carnival prize level junk.
Hooome vlog: Jen somehow seems to have FOMO over the explosive diarrhea outbreak so she drowns her sorrows in trying tinned sardines again. Six-month too late to be on trend influencer Jen still can’t hide the disgust on her face when eating them. And she still has several tins in her pantry because she had to buy a shitload all at once. Sardine Girlie challenge? Fail.
They show off their latest Amazon haul where Jen stays on the fish theme, but this time she bought some face product made from salmon sperm. Sperm Girlie? Success! Tim shows off his SDE by buying giant binoculars. Why you ask? Because his ego couldn’t handle seeing everyone else on the cruise have better ones than the shitty little pair he bought on the ship. But no worries, he’ll continue to use the smaller pair for his Broadway shows. Jen shows off her clown shorts, I guess to match her clown face.
PR haul: The Trackers are still lazy at opening mail and decide to open several PR packages various companies sent them. “Time sensitive” has never meant a thing to them so amongst the packages are some things from Jeanette McCurdy to promote her now 6 old month book and the Orlando Magic from their playoff run back in April.
Chicago: On their way to their Alaska cruise they stay a few days in Chicago to once again feed Tim’s Pokemon obsession. They stay in a historically old Hilton and the Trackers can’t hide their disgust at it. They walked to the Field Museum where we endure Tim reading off every single Pokemon exhibit for what seems like hours. Tim did walk a few extra feet to show us Lake Michigan, from quite a distance. They ventured out a whole block and a half for dinner.
Harry Potter Lug bag. Several “influencers” are invited out to a Lug bag event at Universal where they are given robes in addition to building bags. Even though Tim, Nick and the Bippidi Boppit chick are #hosted they seem to forget the premise of HP and act more like fairies than wizards--well at least Tim and Nick.
Patreon: They promoted a new discounted 15% savings on their Patreon if you buy a yearly membership upfront. It doesn’t seem to be attracting any new members, only existing member that most likely would have stayed around for a year anyway. So win?
Busch Gardens: Tim was invited out to celebrate the closing of a rolly coasty and surprisingly attends himself instead of sending the help. He probably needs his alone time after dealing with Jen and the boys for so long. Tim rides Kumba three times with his pube beard flowing in the wind. He determines all other rolly coasties have too long of a line so he skips them and Jen just adds old ride footage from various old vids. Jen is working on her creativity and works in a few “future” Tims in odd places including in a Teletubby-like sun and, more appropriately, in a trash can. As strict as Tim has been with his new diet one would assume he would also avoid speedy and intense thrill rides. But Dr Tim knows all, right?
Six Ravens: It’s time to gorge on some Hot Pockets at the new concept from Gideon’s with their old pal Nick. Nick waited in the virtual queue for an hour until Tim and Jen joined him near the end. I guess the desperation to be Tim’s friend still blinds that idiot in realizing that they hate him and they only use him for things like this. So they are still looking for any excuse to ditch the kids in what is quickly becoming one less summer that they get to spend with them. Jen devours several Hot Pockets sitting on the ground while Tim asks if she thinks he would have liked any of them. Oh, goodie, Tim gets to try some potatoes. This new “allergy” diet thing is getting real old, real fast. Jen decides to add more voog footage from a different DS day where they spent a shitload of time fondling Halloween merch followed by a brunch at the Boathouse. For yet another meal Tim gets meat and potatoes, with no butter. Jen is amazed that they are so accommodating with “allergies”. Yes, Jen, it is 2026 and allergies are so common where no restaurant wants to deal with any repercussions from allergens so they take this shit seriously.
Mike is spotted cruising with Rae and June. A convention of people thrown off Tracker Island?
Cruise: They are off to Vancouver from Chicago via LAX (yeah, it doesn’t make sense) but they are the travel experts. A quick night’s stay at the Fairmont before boarding the ship and the cruise footage must be a disaster because she puts travel day, embarkation and the 2nd day al in one vid. Jen is disinterested in anything Tim has to say and seems to be pretty much crying the entire cruise. Tim seems to be faring a tad better. No booty butts yet, but he attempts to seem interested in the scenery and wildlife so maybe that’s getting him through it all.
Tattler news:
I would like to thank everyone so much for the well wishes regarding my dog's passing. It wasn’t my first, and certainly won’t be my last, but this one was just extraordinarily devastating but your kinds words have helped. Again, thank you all.
And I hate to be selfish and hog all the Tattler personal news but my divorce was also finalized this week and it’s not some place I ever thought I would be and it’s been really tough, but each day I do find happiness growing so maybe in the end it will be for the best, so I am choosing nothing but positivity around it, So I’d like to raise a glass with you all.
Previous thread:
The Tim Tracker #255 Please stop feeding Oliver only grilled chicken; he's going to sprout feathers soon!
Congrats to @Iwantallthetea and @ETsMomma for the thread title! Previous thread recap: I apologize that the recaps are such a mishmash but with the inconsistent video posting mixed in with overlapping IG posts it just seems incoherent. We will start with Alaska I guess. Courtney posted a...
tattle.life
xmasbdaygirl
VIP Member
You've mentioned this about 9 million times...the answer is always the same. Jackson and Oliver are a part of TheTimTracker channel, why would they need their own thread? They are prominently featured on TTT vlogs, which is where the comments here generate from. Jackson and Oliver having their own thread literally makes no sense. Should Jenn have a separate thread from Tim? This thread is about the channel and the characters on the channel, if you don't like that, you don't have to comment on it. It's a free country and last I checked we still have the right to free speech. There is no reason for them to have their own thread.
Nick is a supporting character in TTT universe because he does the podcast and talks about all this nonsense on the SHARED podcast with Tim. There is no reason to have a separate thread for the podcast vs the channel. It all overlaps. But again, we've gone over this with you a million times, yet you continuously bring it up, just to get a rise out of us. And I realize I fell for the troll bait, hook, line and sinker, but JFC, enough already.
xmasbdaygirl
VIP Member
Also (and I know, now I seem a little obsessed here) her hunting me down and blocking me on Twitter post-cruise should be enough for any lurkers to believe that I have nailed every single thing that I've said about them. And it hurt her that someone got behind the smoke and mirrors and told everyone how it is.
This is why it's taken so long to get these cruise vlogs up. You can't have a family channel when your family is dysfunctional and people have seen it.
Looking forward to the Castaway Cay vlog, Jenn, where you husband ditches you to film booty butts and kids in swimsuits and your kid is throwing a fit in the water and you're carrying a naked baby around. Oh, are you going to leave those gems out?
This is why it's taken so long to get these cruise vlogs up. You can't have a family channel when your family is dysfunctional and people have seen it.
Looking forward to the Castaway Cay vlog, Jenn, where you husband ditches you to film booty butts and kids in swimsuits and your kid is throwing a fit in the water and you're carrying a naked baby around. Oh, are you going to leave those gems out?
pkd81
Active member
Rebelle
VIP Member
Cold&Bitter
VIP Member
The Tim Tracker #139 There’s not enough sponsored deodorant in the world to cover the stench of this dying channel.
xmasbdaygirl
VIP Member
Someone just mentioned to lurk on Tattle and we'd have the tea...so welcome new folks! We are a fun bunch here who seem to care more about the children than their actual parents. Please refer to the Wiki tab up at the top of the page to catch yourselves up.
To the question asked on the Facebook group---yes, Tim and Jenn did say they were planning on keeping the boys separated. This can be found in the video where they install the baby gate at the top of the stairs, after J$ turned 3, which way too old to install a gate to prevent him from hurting himself on the stairs, it was meant to "jail" him. They mention this way Jackson (we refer to him as J$ here, Jackpot, he's the OG Buddy monemaker) can be kept upstairs and away from the baby. They did a very, very poor job preparing J$ for his new brother and if you closely watch the videos, they are very, very rarely in the same place at the same time and when they are, Tim and Jenn are usually freaking out and constantly correcting him, not to touch, not to hurt.
Our basic mantra here is: Those poor children. Feel free to join along, we are always open to newcomer and new opinions.
PS--Contrary to what Tim and Jenn told y'all, there are way more than 3 of us here.
To the question asked on the Facebook group---yes, Tim and Jenn did say they were planning on keeping the boys separated. This can be found in the video where they install the baby gate at the top of the stairs, after J$ turned 3, which way too old to install a gate to prevent him from hurting himself on the stairs, it was meant to "jail" him. They mention this way Jackson (we refer to him as J$ here, Jackpot, he's the OG Buddy monemaker) can be kept upstairs and away from the baby. They did a very, very poor job preparing J$ for his new brother and if you closely watch the videos, they are very, very rarely in the same place at the same time and when they are, Tim and Jenn are usually freaking out and constantly correcting him, not to touch, not to hurt.
Our basic mantra here is: Those poor children. Feel free to join along, we are always open to newcomer and new opinions.
PS--Contrary to what Tim and Jenn told y'all, there are way more than 3 of us here.
Dub Dublington
New member
Heeeyy Guuuyyzzz!!!
Long time lurker but freshly minted member of the “unwell”
So this day 6 vlog finally broke me. I knew they had become completely unrelatable but now it’s just straight up lies. The way they tried to control the Covid narrative….
I could almost buy it, however if you look closely at about 9:15 when they go back to the room and Jennbo says to the buddy “are you gonna say hello to grandpa” if you look outside, you can clearly see the ship is in port - not at Sea. Buildings in the background….
Also, the pre lunch on the aft of the ship just after is also in port, you can see land AND another cruise ship alongside them, and Dim is mysteriously absent….
If I had to guess, this footage was cut in from their Grand Cayman day where they stayed on the ship, no way the buffet is that quiet on a sea day.
Considering they had “such a full day guyzzz” I can’t help but wonder what got left out to put old footage in
Long time lurker but freshly minted member of the “unwell”
So this day 6 vlog finally broke me. I knew they had become completely unrelatable but now it’s just straight up lies. The way they tried to control the Covid narrative….
I could almost buy it, however if you look closely at about 9:15 when they go back to the room and Jennbo says to the buddy “are you gonna say hello to grandpa” if you look outside, you can clearly see the ship is in port - not at Sea. Buildings in the background….
Also, the pre lunch on the aft of the ship just after is also in port, you can see land AND another cruise ship alongside them, and Dim is mysteriously absent….
If I had to guess, this footage was cut in from their Grand Cayman day where they stayed on the ship, no way the buffet is that quiet on a sea day.
Considering they had “such a full day guyzzz” I can’t help but wonder what got left out to put old footage in
hcslacs
VIP Member
I would like to re-submit this suggestion from the last thread since it was a close second and still so timely.
TTT 233: Griftmas is starting now
Credit to @xmasbdaygirl and @airbusA330
TTT 233: Griftmas is starting now
Credit to @xmasbdaygirl and @airbusA330
airbusA330
VIP Member
well it didn’t do it as an action figure but lol
xmasbdaygirl
VIP Member
I have to admit I didn't go back to check that post and wow, it’s pretty overwhelming the support you have all shown. I also think for a bunch of jealous hating basement dwellers, you are all pretty amazing humans. Words can’t describe how grateful I am for your support.
Are you Jenn?
Lambyo
Chatty Member
You could always wear a disguiseThat’s kind of what I meant—they figure out who I am, I wear my room key around my neck sometimes, they could see my name. My first name is on my door because it is heavily decorated. Not necessarily doxxed—here’s my name, address, make/model of my car kind of dox. I should have said I don’t want to blow my cover.
---
Off Jenn’s tray.
Havok Karlsberg
Well-known member
The TT #173: Same shitty parenting, now with softer water