The Chateau Diaries #305 2 containers full of junk and off to the brocante to buy more. Weeee!

[MRShavershamsdress]

My God, @MRShavershamsdress you have just described to a t my husbands behaviour from about 5 to 10 years ago. I suggested he go and see someone but he adamantly refused. I was also going through a shitload of bad health at the time having had a thyroidectomy due to cancer and, frankly, didn't know which way was up! Somehow we came through it and he rode out his storm of whatever it was and I, after 2 disasters of medical professionals found a wonderful endocrinolgue and got my meds sorted out.

Another bizarre change to his behaviour happened just recently. His mother died. And he has become a lighter more ready to shrug tit off person! It occurred to me earlier this week, this change in his demeanour, and you guys are the only people I've mentioned it to because I guess it's a tricky, thorny subject. He was not close to his mother. She was a narcissist. And having moved here over 20 years ago hasn't seen much of her. But since her death it is as if an invisible weight has been lifted.

It’s amazing the relief one feels knowing that a destructive parent can no longer reach you. Even though a lifetime of damage is still there, just knowing their ability to inflict further harm has ended is very freeing. Plus you can visit their grave and read them the riot act without them being able to fight back.

 

[TorontoGWM]

 

[Beachgirl]

@mrsp67 while I’ve never been married, much less had a successful longterm relationship I do have a few insights into men. As a gentleman of a certain age I began going through andropause in my late 40’s escalating into my early 50’s. It’s also called age related low testosterone. My symptoms were very similar to what you are describing. Short tempered to the point of viciousness, belittling, frustrated, distractible and quite a bit scared. For me the personality changes were confusing and frightening. I also noticed physical changes, some involving the act of sex itself, some just bodily changes. And the hot flashes, dear God, the hot flashes. How you ladies manage that I’ll never know. I think your husband comes from a very macho culture. If so,he’s probably terrified and that will add fuel to the fire. Not all men go through this. I have a terrific care team and both my primary care and urologist did not recommend HRT for men as it often worsens the symptoms, not to mention causing health complications. They still sent me to an endocrinologist, who confirmed the diagnosis and also recommended against it. The best advice I got was to wait it out and let my hormone levels readjust. Once I was on the other side of the process, my symptoms resolved and most of the behaviors reverted to normal. I am still more short tempered and my filters are absolutely shot, but I’ve learned to stop and take a deep breath before responding. That said, if he is indeed going through andropause that’s still no excuse for his behavior. Most men are loathe to get medical help for the simplest of things, much less something they might see as embarrassing. He will probably need to be coaxed into going. I’m not a prayer personally. In this instance I have asked my church prayer chain across the Gulf Coast and up the Eastern Seaboard to put out a request. Even my humanist group is asking for good vibes for you. I hope this helps and you get the best possible outcome to your challenges. This poisonous troll will be here if you need any more support.

It must be my hormones but your reply brought tears to my eyes. 🫶🫶

 

[On Repeat]

How nonsensical is it that Stephanie Jarvis can be in awe of a natural phenomenon, which cost nothing, didn't have a designer tag attached and which was enjoyed by millions of plebs around the world. WTF, enjoyment without a price tag, I don't buy it. Attention seeking bleep.

 

[Ladeda1957]

My God, @MRShavershamsdress you have just described to a t my husbands behaviour from about 5 to 10 years ago. I suggested he go and see someone but he adamantly refused. I was also going through a shitload of bad health at the time having had a thyroidectomy due to cancer and, frankly, didn't know which way was up! Somehow we came through it and he rode out his storm of whatever it was and I, after 2 disasters of medical professionals found a wonderful endocrinolgue and got my meds sorted out.

Another bizarre change to his behaviour happened just recently. His mother died. And he has become a lighter more ready to shrug tit off person! It occurred to me earlier this week, this change in his demeanour, and you guys are the only people I've mentioned it to because I guess it's a tricky, thorny subject. He was not close to his mother. She was a narcissist. And having moved here over 20 years ago hasn't seen much of her. But since her death it is as if an invisible weight has been lifted.

I’m going though this a bit now hubby just turned 60, just had a thyroidectomy a few weeks ago and the roller coaster ride of mood swings is unbelievable, he’s settled down a bit now but I think the hormones are all over the place. I said to him if this is your new personality i won’t be sticking around, too quick to get cranky. We’ve been together for 40 years and even my daughter noticed and she’s a daddy’s girl.

 

[TorontoGWM]

 

[CocktailGirl]

Derail: attention 15 hags, smart creative intuitive & multi cultural people who I find intellectually stimulating. I’ve found myself in a conundrum. And I know so many of you have many health and family issues, that I do pray for. But i need advice as many of you are in long time marriages and partnerships. I’m embarrassed to talk to my people. I’ve been married for 34 years and have been working with my husband 6 days a week for 25 years, lately he has become so disgruntled, dismissive and angry. Going as fas as embarrassing me in front of the staff. I try walking away and he hates it. Besides medicating myself to numbness I’ve no idea how to handle it!! Please advise!!!

I am really sorry to hear you are so unhappy. I am in awe of any couple that have lived and worked together for so many years. I am hopeless at it, and I have no medical insights to offer either. But I did think of one thing that might be worth thinking about.

Last year, my best friend announced, completely out of the blue, that she was thinking of leaving her husband after, like you, decades of living and working happily together but then suddenly facing living with a angry man that she did not recognize. After a lot of encouragement by friends and family they went for counselling.

The result was this: she had hit menopause and, like so many women, had slowly become more assertive. She was no longer just a mum, wife and workmate, she had found her voice and found her true self after so many years of putting others first. It had happened slowly over a couple of years, but her husband was not used to it and saw her increasing confidence as an affront to his position and his years of feeling in charge. His response was to be dismissive and grumpy.

I don't know where you are on the menopause merry-go-round, but it might be worth thinking about.

The good news is that, once the counseller explained what was happening, they were easily able to recognise what had happened, and they are now both very happily back on course. I hope it will be the same for you.

 

[C'est moi]

I’m going though this a bit now hubby just turned 60, just had a thyroidectomy a few weeks ago and the roller coaster ride of mood swings is unbelievable, he’s settled down a bit now but I think the hormones are all over the place. I said to him if this is your new personality i won’t be sticking around, too quick to get cranky. We’ve been together for 40 years and even my daughter noticed and she’s a daddy’s girl.

It's really tough. The thyroid is such a small piece of machinery but it does so much important stuff. When it's first taken they give you a box of pills and say take 1 a day. They don't tell you anything about the roller coaster you are about to embark on and how to deal with it, what effect it's all going to have on your nearest and dearest. Then they do blood tests and tweak the medication accordingly, quite regularly. They don't consider for one moment that the medication they have given you, the cheapest available through the national health system, may not suit you, may make you ill, that there are alternatives. And when you're feeling that tit and disappearing into yourself you think "these are the health professionals, they know what they're doing". Do they duck! The 2 previous ones I had literally told me it was all in my head and I was over reacting! That I needed to give the medication time. I gave it 4 years and was getting worse and worse. A very dear friend, who happened to be the PA of the director at Cancer centre where I had treatment, saw how badly I was struggling, saw how it was affecting us all and she spoke to a doctor there and then phoned me and said "you have an appointment with the specialist cancer doctor who treated you previously, she's not an endoclinologue but she will see you and see what can be done". I will forever be eternally grateful to my friend for what she selflessly did for us. I still go for my regularly check ups to see the Dr who is not an endocrinologue, it's been 6 years I've been with her and, whilst there are hiccups, we only move forward now.

I can't stress how important it is to find the right medical specialists for you and your condition(s). Here in France we are very fortunate with the system that if we are not happy with the treatment, diagnosis etc., we are free to go elsewhere. There is no jumping through hoops for 2nd, 3rd, 4th opinions or explaining to a medical board why you didn't like the doctor and want to change.

 

[graciemckitten]

How nonsensical is it that Stephanie Jarvis can be in awe of a natural phenomenon, which cost nothing, didn't have a designer tag attached and which was enjoyed by millions of plebs around the world. WTF, enjoyment without a price tag, I don't buy it. Attention seeking bleep.

Great point! Something for nothing Jarvis was trying to act like a martyr and a “ friend” by offering to people who pay $32,000 monthly to support her extravagant lifestyle, a free download of two or three pictures of a natural phenomenon that was actually seen by billions of people on this planet for free that same night. The photos themselves, taken on this date, under these particular circumstances, were of no particular monetary value, so Stephanie decided to generously offer them to her patrons and then try to use them to lure other people to sign up to be a patron. There isn’t an honest or generous bone in her greedy body. So predictable. Wait until potty returns and adds his photo shopping skills to exaggerate the northern lights around the dump in a limited edition print that he will proceed to sell for €200.

 

[TorontoGWM]

 

[Bleu Lala]

So here’s my theory. Little Princess Stefameee was told by a wise person she needed to lighten the structural load on the falling down castle. She told Cuz and he was like “Oh hell no! I told you when you put all that literal tit up there it was a bad idea there is no ducking way I’m packing it up and carrying it back down! Yo Nat let’s go to the South of France and help Mama and Papa! Peace out Stef!”
Little Princess Stefameee was sad and went looking for a manly man to help her in her time of need. She looked at her fiancé and rolled her eyes and thought Well you might break a nail. You’re not going to be any help at all. She was right. She then called the other two owners of the falling down castle. One said “Sorry Stefameeee I’m going on vacation with my actual family.” She rolled her eyes and thought, you have to wear that damn bag on your head, you’re not going to be any help at all. She was right. Then she called the other owner, “Oh hey Babe, we sure had a good time in Japan didn’t we? Wink wink! Oh no I gotta go shoot the zoom zoom cars, but maybe you could meet up with me in Dubai later on? Wink wink!” She rolled her eyes and thought, You’re no help at all, welllll maybe he is . I sure can’t have well him throwing his back out if I’m going to Dubai!
Princess Stephamee pouts her lips and thinks really hard, she really tries to wrinkle her forehead (to show she’s thinking really hard, but that is impossible nowadays).
She thinks of other manly men she knows - Dan’s busy, and besides that he’s just use my channel to get more views on his channel (the bastard). Hmmmm, oooh what about Grant? He’s a manly man (and boy how I could use one of those around here) and I’m sure he would literally fly half way around the world to do manual labor like packing up literal tit and carrying it down several flights of steps and across the castle grounds into a mouldy, rank shipping container, where it will be destroyed.
Thats my theory!
Too bad there’s no equivalent to Two Men and a Truck or College Hunks Hauling Junk in the whole of France….

 

[TorontoGWM]

 

[Lady Avonlea]

It's so telling that Fanny used the term Arctic Circle as a travel destination, that's very misleading. So where exactly did she go? Finland, Sweden, Iceland, Russia, Alaska, Greenland, Canada or Norway? She likes to present it as she was hobnobbing with polar bears by omitting information. It reminds me of people that say that have been to this country or that country when all they did was go through the airport in said country. She's so full of herself. And why mention that her slippers got wet? So? What's that got to do with anything, other than her stupidity of not wearing proper footwear.
---

The wellies were in the boot of the Porsche or sitting in back hallway, but Fanny didn’t think she needed them. The poor little princess doesn’t mind ruining her footwear because she’ll just purchase another pair.

My question is if it was wet out, therefore apparently rainy/cloudy, how did Fanny see the lights? Is this a photoshop job?

 

[CountessPompidoo]

Look how Fanny brown noses her Pateons. She marks the comment with a heart (can't see it in this cut & paste jobbie) and Mummy (allegedly), joins in. No other likes or comments on any other message, just this one.

They certainly know how to manipulate and keep them sweet. She'll do anything to keep the money rolling in :

1 day ago
Thank you Stephanie I am one of your patrons from California. I love your blogs. I have a 7 year old daughter and because of your blogs I am able to show her a different culture. She thinks of you as part of our family. We will go to a store and she will say Stephanie will like that. She has learned so much. In the future we hope to stay at the Chateau.

@isabellejarvis7805
1 day ago
Thank you for your support.

 

[Beachgirl]

The wellies were in the boot of the Porsche or sitting in back hallway, but Fanny didn’t think she needed them. The poor little princess doesn’t mind ruining her footwear because she’ll just purchase another pair.

My question is if it was wet out, therefore apparently rainy/cloudy, how did Fanny see the lights? Is this a photoshop job?

Good thinking. I went onto the grass in my garden that night to take my photos and my feet remained completely dry.

 

[Lochness Monster]

@billybudd - you and @Hedda Hopper hit the nail on the head- FRK only knows what she knows, and is stuck in a rut. People become chefs because they are passionate about food- they eat everywhere from "hole-in-the-floor restaurants" to Michelin-starred venues because they want to experience and learn something new. They know what produce is in season, and where to source the best meats, cheeses, baked goods and wines because they've tried them. While we are not all fans of Stuart, whose personality is as big as Texas, she knows what is in season, and continually experiments with dishes.

When is the last time (if ever) we saw FRK go to the weekend local Farmer's Market? While the weekends are when she is making guest meals, she could carve out a few hours to buy produce, chat with the locals (make new friends), and discover new local products (cheeses, wines, etc.) Additionally, while she probably does not make much money (if any), it wouldn't hurt Fanny to step up and take her out to a restaurant (not Maccas) for lunch once a week so she can at least experience French cuisine and try new things. This would also provide her with the one-on-one time with Fanny that she so desperately craves, and Fanny would have an actual clue about what restaurants there are in the local area for a change. I'd rather see FRK go to the Farmer's Market than watch another Brocante shopping excursion!

Where Fanny goes Snorts must go too. He only eats spaghettini, steak and chips and burgers. Snorts ruins everything .

 

[graciemckitten]

Look how Fanny brown noses her Pateons. She marks the comment with a heart (can't see it in this cut & paste jobbie) and Mummy (allegedly), joins in. No other likes or comments on any other message, just this one.

They certainly know how to manipulate and keep them sweet. She'll do anything to keep the money rolling in :

1 day ago
Thank you Stephanie I am one of your patrons from California. I love your blogs. I have a 7 year old daughter and because of your blogs I am able to show her a different culture. She thinks of you as part of our family. We will go to a store and she will say Stephanie will like that. She has learned so much. In the future we hope to stay at the Chateau.


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@isabellejarvis7805
1 day ago
Thank you for your support.

Granny farming runs deep in the Jarvis family.

 

[Scorpio]

Good thinking. I went onto the grass in my garden that night to take my photos and my feet remained completely dry.

I haven't said but I have been on holiday in France for several weeks. The rain has been horrendous. This last month I have been fairly close to Fanny and her crew of misfits. The ground is saturated and water is running fast still in all the streams and drains. So she could have got her feet wet.

If it helps with plotting timelines, the past 4/5 days have been sunny and warm but this afternoon is back to thundery rain. The forecast for the next week across the whole region is for rain and more rain plus fairly moderate temperatures. So if she is mincing around the garden in the sunshine you will know it is old footage.

 

[Lochness Monster]

If not fox, raccoons, pine martens, skunk and cats are all predators as well and pine martens can climb

Foxes can climb up fences and jump pretty high.
I think it was Ratso. Hens can die of fight/ heart attack. We have seen Ratso chase the peacocks.
If Pavlina or Curtsey clipped a wing then unlike the peacocks the hens would be unable to fly away.

I do think Fanny would say if it were a fox.

 

[CocktailGirl]

Foxes can climb up fences and jump pretty high.
I think it was Ratso. Hens can die of fight/ heart attack. We have seen Ratso chase the peacocks.
If Pavlina or Curtsey clipped a wing then unlike the peacocks the hens would be unable to fly away.

I do think Fanny would say if it were a fox.

Are they holding back because of a grand reveal for the TV programme? The unveiling of their palatial new hen house, complete with central heating, hot and cold running water, gold plated taps, toile wallpaper, and expensive panelling? A project that Amaury has been secretly working on? A miniature model of LaLande?

Either that, or they are frantically scouring Europe searching for lookalike chickens to take the place of the slaughtered flock. A bit like you do with your kid's dead goldfish or hamster...